Sunday 9 October 2011

You never know!

Everything is unknown for everyone.
You could be right as rain one day.
The future seems very bright.
You feel on top of the world.
You can cope with everything and everyone.
You feel fitter, quicker and brighter than ever.
Over night something bad has happened you, this has affected the rest of your life.
Now you feel worse than ever because you are so unaware of the world around you.
To be sure you don't know what is and is not coming to you.
Suddenly everything and anything is out of you.
It's all gone for life.
You are a changed person.
You've gone from an very unsuccessful person to a most unsuccessful person.
You will be very lucky to be that successful person again, if you are it could take a lot of hard work to get your life back together again.
Make the best of what and who you are in case you may not see tomorrow.
Please try harder to understand people who have not got as much going as you have or they may have to work harder for longer to get there!
The truth of the matter is that you will never understand unless it happens to you.
Everyone has to go through good and bad in life as I write, some worse or and better than others.
Birth, nursery, school, college, friendships, friendships gives some happiness but also stresses in life.
People with disabilities and health problems get stress out, ill or and even die easy due to on top of the problems we have already.
There's support for some things for us but not for others.
Without the same right as other people we will be alone in the world even though we have one another.
We understand that it's hard for other people, we just have to work harder to get there than other people or we don't get there at all. 9.10.2011

Trying too hard.

Too easy to fear the worst in life which doesn't turn out as bad as we think or not bad at all.
The worst isn't always as bad as it seems.
At times the excepted can which could be good when you thought it was bad.
The future is unknown so don't plan, life is mapped out for you.
It's not helpful to worry about something that seems likes everything but then it's nothing at all.
Everyone is to blame at some point for worrying about something we should have done.
To move forward.
To believe in yourself then you can believe in others around you.
Don't lose trust in others because many others have broke your trust.
Like and love yourself then you can like and love others.
Something small seems really big.
The hole needs to be sewed up before it gets too big.
The mole needs to stop growing before it becomes a molehill.
The hardest part is to think positive when you have been thinking negative too long.
We can only think positive if we want.
In many cases in life there's no such word as can't, the words are won't and want. 26.10.2011

Fear.

When I know I am going see you, I fear I'm going to blow because I have blown it with the people I used to love.
Every time with you I have surprised myself that I haven't done and said the wrong things when I have been and not drunk.
When I am not with you I fear the worst of myself but then I learn to trust myself, which helps me a lot to trust you.
I love you far too much not to trust you.
I wouldn't lose in you because others before you broke my trust. 26.10.2011

Tomorrow is another day.

Never think good or bad about tomorrow.
You don't know what tomorrow is going to be like until it comes.
Even if the bad is here the good will come another day or bad may turn into good.
Good may happen as soon as tomorrow just wait and see.
Good will happen to those who wait.
Nothing can be good all the time.
Nothing can be bad all the time.
Change happens whether we like it not but some things happen for the worst others happen for the better.
Nothing can stay the same but some things do stay the same.
Life would be boring if everything stayed the same yet if everything changed.
It's not good to stay sad all the time, too much pain can damage you.
It's not good stay happy all the time, too much happiness can spoil you too much.
Pain can make you strong.
Too much happiness can make you weak but a lot happiness can make you stable.

Morning.

The day has just started.
The clouds are white.
The sky is grey.
I find hard to think good or bad thoughts, I just get on with my day.
Nevertheless I am ok until.
I come back from the Job Centre, I get a letter through my door from Income Support.
Saying I said I am working when I haven't said anything at all.
I am working hard not to let these Benefit people stress me out before I scream and shout.
The only you in my mind keeps me calm.
I'm willing to stay stable and calm despite the fact the problem needs to be looked at soon as possible. 27.1o.2011


Everyone is looking at me.

The bar is crowded.
I try to find a condor.
I try to find a space to wait for the crowd to calm down.
Everyone is looking at me knowing that I fear crowds.
I walk out the pub, where I go next is unknown.
I come back there are less people standing by the bar as I get myself a drink.
Now I take forever to find a seat, in the mean time people are starling at me knowing that I am stressed.
They are looking at me strange, then I turn my head away.
In time I smile, they wonder what I am smiling at.
I am thinking that I don't need a reason to make me smile.
Who cares what they think?
So what I am smiling for no reason, mad they might think.
There's no point being sad only because they might be. 27.10.2011

Change.

You cannot avoid change.
One bus has gone but another bus is come.
When is an unknown question.
One love has gone but another love is soon.
When is an unknown question.
Some people or and things are meant be the same but not everything and everybody.
When is any time?
Today
Tomorrow
The next day
Next week
Next year
Who knows?
Whatever or whoever you are waiting for something or someone may be right for you.
There's at least some things and some people stay put but not all.
Some things you need to work to get what's right for you but some of us never find it or who.
Don't try hard because that will never do, you will never get anywhere.
Try hard hard enough because you never get anywhere if you don't try at all.
Don't hope too much, you will never get anywhere.
Take everyday as it comes, if that isn't good enough nothing ever will be.
Never think you can get all what you want. 27.10.2011


You.

Whatever worries me you ease my mind all the time, whether I see you or not.
Having you on my mind keeps me going when life is tough.
I can accept every in life when I have you on my mind.
I ride my exercise bike even though I am not getting anywhere.
I think about you all the time whether I am down in myself or not, then I start to feel good.
I do everything I can to keep myself strong. 27.10.2011


no more tears to cry.

No more tears to cry but sadness is still here.
It was all so long ago.
Nothing was ever done because it was understood or believed.
Pain is unknown whether I like it not.
Even now no one understands or believes me.
I find it hard to talk about even now.
I may not be crying on the outside but I am crying on the inside.
I am smiling on the outside but feeling pain on the inside.
I used to find it hard to sleep in fear of seeing one of you, a few of you or even more.
Now none of you bother me at all.
You have all been here far too long to stay.
My mind is just wondering away thoughts.
I find that I am believing in myself at last.
When I have been through this pain so long nothing is new to me.
The thoughts have been inside my head far too long.
The grass is always greener on the other side. 20.11.2011


Just get on with it!

How I get through everyday, I don't know.
There must walk around as if nothing has happened.
No one knows what one another are thinking.
I don't shut myself away from the world because life is for living that's what your born for.
I just get on with life, I have never known anything else.
More than 30 years on since the first one, they have still got away with it just because me been just a child and having learning disabilities.
No good talking about it whatever I say nothing gets done.
The present is here yesterday has gone let's live for today.
Tomorrow is unknown.
Time to move on.
The pain has gone on far too long to hurt me any more.
I was far too young to tell anyone.
Far too young to know what was going on.
Too young to understand.
Too young to be understood.
Even now over 40, my words just can't speak. 20.11.2011

Face truth.

Friendship is best or nothing at all.
If we love again we'll hurt one all over again.
I don't know about you but I am too old to take any more.
We must face the truth, we can't fall out if we aren't lovers.
Remember you broke my heart, I had to go along with what you wanted.
Now it's my turn to walk away but I am never coming back only as a friend.
If you can't take that you'll never see me again.

If only I knew that one day my pain would come back on you, what you caused me.
At the time I felt as if I had no future and my whole world was broken.
I never thought my life would be better without you. How wrong was I to think I could never live without you, I felt so alone?

Now it's far too late for you, I am not going to let you hurt me any more.
I am not spending the rest of my life wondering whether or not your in or out of my life.

In fact I don't think you loved me at all, I believe you still don't, you only love me because you know I don't love you any more.
If I still loved you wouldn't have loved me.
I know we have both been there before.
I had to leave for that mouth because the stress was getting far too much.
Before long I stopped loving bad news for you and good news for me.
I never thought I would have ever stopped loving because I loved you for so long.

One day you will meet someone who you will love ten times more than you loved me.
She won't be able stand for what I stood for.
If you walk all over her she'd be out your life like a flash for good then you will really will know what pain is.

To think I was scared of losing you for good after you hurt me so bad.
Now I realise that I am better off without you or we are better off been just been friends.

I understand that this year has been taught for you with everything happening all at once but sadly everyone goes through death at some time, you aren't alone.
Moving on is hard I know, you need to make a life for yourself or end up a lonely old man.

You soon moved on when you left me and went out with someone else, didn't you?
I was the one who found it hard to move on but not any more.
I am having a happier life without you if not better. 21.11.2011

Believe your there somewhere.

I believe whoever you are, you are out there somewhere.
You may not be there yet.
I have had too many bad thoughts in my head to think any more bad thoughts.
Never chase never hope just life day by day.
To dream is to hope too much and end up disappointed.
Let luck and love find us.
Just get on with life! 20.11.2011

What happened?

You were so sweet when I first met you, I thought butter wouldn't melt in your month.
Nothing and no one could take me away from you.
Then you weren't the man I thought you was.
You broke my heart when you left me for someone else.
My feelings carried on the same nothing stopped me from feeling love for you.
13 and a half years on and off I stuck out until I had enough.
Sorry I couldn't take more pain that you were giving me. 21.11.2011

I can do no more.

The truth hurts you so it should.
I can do no more.
You had your chance of my romance, which didn't took.
You said that there will be no one else in your life, it was never like that when I did love you so why be any different now?
I don't believe that anyone else will let you hurt them like I let you hurt me.
I must be the softest door mat of all but not any more.
Why did I take so much?
Because I loved you so.
Now I can't imagine how and why I loved you so.
All I ever wanted was someone who would love for what and who I am not what they can get out of me.
All you have from me now is friendship or nothing at all, your choice.
I have a happy life now that I'd be a mad fool to walk away from.
No way would I be as sad as you, walking away from happiness you could do without.
You will never spoil my happiness. 21.11.2011

I believe someone loves me, somehow, somewhere.

Someone loves me somehow, somewhere, even if it's not who I think it is.
In that case I don't know but I believe he's out there somewhere.
Despite been knocked over and picking myself up all the time I never give up with love, I believe your out there somewhere.
No matter what pain puts me through I don't give up on love.
I have stopped chasing hopes and dreams.
I am a fighter, I will go through whatever life throw at me.
We are put on this earth to enjoy life even though life is what you make it.
Not to waist time starling into space.
Life would be boring if it was all the same so life is full of happiness and pain in all areas.
Time is to use not to waste.
There's no right or wrong, go for what makes you happy and move on from what makes you sad.
Not all happiness works out. 21.11.2011

We are are never too old.

We are never too old, we are forever young.
Life is for living and drinking.
Take what comes never stop.
New will come along if nothing is right for you.
May be one day something or someone will be right for you.
Believe in yourself, then you can believe in others.
Enjoy life rather than waste life.
Life isn't happy all the time otherwise we'd be all spoiled and get away with what we want.
Never doubt yourself because something or someone has let you down.
There are plenty of people who won't let you down so you don't need the people who do.
Enjoy drink and fun.
Face the tomorrow day to look forward to tomorrow night.
If you ever get old, you can look back on a happy life, no matter how much it costs you.
There's always a way of balancing career with your fun. 21.11.2011


Feelings.

Feelings are hard to control when you love someone.
Falling in love is not easy to control but you don't have to fall in love to love.
When you fall in love it can be hard to let go if things go wrong.
Here I go again loving again, goodness knows how long it will last.
With knowing what I learned from the last love I believe this love will end.
As I said feelings are hard to control but one but never knows the future.
When many relationships have failed in the past, it's hard to think positive.
It's my feelings that make me never give up.
The future is any one's guess.
No hopes are built but I love him so much.
I miss him so much but he's a man, I guess he will love as long or short as he wants to.
I'll have to move on and start like I have always done, goodness know how many times I will fall in love before I die.
Who knows he may be the one for me and I may be the one for him?
The future is unknown.
All I know is that I love him and miss him so much. 21.11.2011

It all seems like a long goodbye.

It all seems like a long goodbye, seeing you tomorrow is unknown.
Goodbye for another day, mouth, week, year or whenever it is as long as your still mine I will never give up on you.
May be I will see you tomorrow but I can't take the pain of saying goodbye not knowing when I will see you again.
I will call you.
I will text you.
I will wait until I see you again.
I don't want to spoil what we have got, a little bit more time together wouldn't go a miss but I understand if not.
Still I will go along with however it is because I love you so much. 21.11.2011

Everyone is alone but not alone.

Today the world seems far too dull.
Money is tighter than ever.
No one is alone we are all in these hard times together.
We are alone when it comes to choosing our lives, now money doesn't give us a lot of choice.
Jobs and courses are very hard to find.
It's hard to think positive about the future when negative is around us in the present.
One can only go by what it's seems like.
It's more likely very little brightness at the end of the tunnel one can see.
We must make the best of what we have got even if it's not a lot.
Anything is better than nothing at all.
If you have nothing at all then there's war, the government shouldn't let it go too far.24.11.2011

Putting on a brave face.

We have to get on with life to live it.
We have to cope with what life throws at us.
All we can do is smile to fight the pain.
Life is what you make but not when you don't have choices.
We need to keep ourselves and one another the best we can.
Help one another just as we did when times were hard all so long ago.
Let's believe we are strong: we can work it out. 24.11.2010

Love.

Love can bring us happiness.
Love can bring us pain.
Never hope when it comes to love.
Love can last for a long but the longer it lasts it can break your heart.
Pain can hit you in the face when you don't know it's going to happen.
No matter how hard it is, we must get up again not every love is the same as the last.
It all goes on like a roller coaster, one never knows unless they try.
It doesn't happen for everyone but there are some people who have thousand fail relationships then one day the right person comes along for them.
Either your lucky or your not, if you give up on yourself you will be completely alone.
It's best to try not to think about get on with life day by day, which isn't easy when you really love someone. 24.11.2011

Another world.

It's hard to know whether life is real or not.
It's hard to know if happiness is real or not.
We may not like the truth but real is truth no one likes pretend and lies in real life.

Sometimes it's hard to know what the truth is depending what it's about.

What we are told, we don't always like.
What we don't like may be better for us.
What do like may be bad for us.
Don't cry the world isn't always black and white.
Not not everything we enjoy is bad for us.
We don't have to feel guilty about everything we do, say, eat, drink and etc.
There are some things we like what are good for us.
It's very rarely enjoyment becomes good for us.
On the whole anything that's bad for us we tends to enjoy, then regret is sooner if not later.
we can't come quick enough enjoy the good and the fun.
We are happy to avoid the things we don't like that are bad for us.
For a lot of us we tend to go with what's bad for us because we enjoy it.
Still we only live once.
If we can't have fun, why are we born? 24.11.2011


Too hard to say goodbye.

It's too hard to say goodbye once I have seen you.
I know it could or and seem like a long time until I see you again.
No matter how much I miss you, I will never give up on you.
No matter what life is like I will never stop loving you.
Nothing and no one will know and spoil what and who goes through my mind.
No matter how much or little I see of you I love no one else.
No matter how hard it is to say goodbye, my patients don't run out for you. 17.12.2011