Chapter four What is a learning disability?

Learning disabilities are conditions that affect everyday lives in peoples' bodies or and mind. Mental disabilities are to do with the mind and Physical disabilities There are all different kinds of disabilities. Muscular Dystrophies is when a person's body weaken gradually in a limit of time. It seems to be more common in male than female.

Spinia Bifida can happen during pregnancy when the spinia cord (nerves run down the spine.) This can affect peoples' balance, movement, bowel and bladder control. It's a bone and joint deformities what affect peoples' movements. Hydrocephalus is high pres sager to the brain because of the fluid not being drained away.

Cerebral Palsy happens during pregnancy. It's a Mental and Physical disability affecting the body and mind. The brain controls the movement of the body in early stages of growth. Almost like one form of Autism that links with Dyspraxia as a hidden Physical disability. With Cerebral Palsy the damage can happen during birth even though the disability happen before birth or any other brain injuries at a very early age. ( Such as a lack of oxygen to the brain or if a child has been shaken. Children face these difficulties, posture(ability to put the body in a chosen position and keep it there.)

There are more disabilities than I have just written. All disabilities can affect everyday lives one way or the other. For eg; mobility, ability with hands, physical co - coordination or bladder and bowel control, ability to lift and carry, move heavy objects,, remembering things, concentration, learning, understanding and or danger awareness. There's still enough awareness on Dyspaxia yet. It's called Dyspaxia Developmental Co - ordination is when people can only cope doing one thing at a time, which slows people down. I have had this problem all my life I'm nearly 42years but people have only started to learn about it about just over ten years ago.

For eg; people can find it hard to fasten shoe laces and buttons.
Finding it hard to carry a hot joint of meat out the oven and heavy hot pans.
A new born baby can slip ones arms.
Can't skip.
Can't ride a bike.
Can't drive a car.

I haven't been diagnosed Dyspaxia but my Auntie think I have Dyspaxia. Over the past
ten years or so she has come across a few who have the same problems as me. I still
think I need to be diagnosed but I wouldn't be surprised if I am because my Co - ordanation is bad are Motor skills. now I have learned what my own problems could be I would like to help others like me to see they will get more help than me. For eg; seeing that young children better exercise support than what I did. Support aids and seeing that people get the support people need.

My experience of Dyslexia is very often a memory problem for eg; I remember getting bs and ds mixed up I was needing to write the word dog. I suddenly went blank so when wrote the og I know I was wrong because bog didn't look right to me. I rubbed it out to put dog, yet I have stories and poems in my mind. I have always been known for missing words out of sentences and numbers back to front 82 becomes 28, yet I have always found maths very hard. Yet getting numbers back to front and bs and ds the right way round doesn't happen as often now, I still miss words out of sentences and get letters in the wrong places even though I know they are in the word. Sometimes I notice my mistakes other times I don't that's why I need a proof reader.


Hearing, speech, eye sight needs braille and sign language, these disabilities can link into a lot if not all disabilities.

it's like when I said there's different kind of Autism. Sorry to confuse you, Autism is a learning disability. As for how people with disabilities cope with like I said with Autism just except the unaccepted not two people with the same disabilities face the same good and bad in life. Learning disability websites adultprotection.org.uk, WWW.mencap.org.uk and community.care.co.uk. There are many more if you tap in learning disability websites in your search engine.

Mencap say that 1 in 5 people in the uk have learning disabilities. Learning disabilities either start before, during or after birth depending what the disabilities are.

Anxiety Disorder is a kind of Mental illness that causes people to feel worried and stressed whether we have anything to worry about or not. Other than counseling,
exercise and cut down on coffee is the only treatment I'm aware of. Most medications may be on the market but I have been living with it far too long to notice, it just
something you learn to accept if you have been living with it all your life. It's
just hard getting people to accept the way you are as a person as well as a person with learning disabilities.

The causes are unknown, it can either
be on it's own or linked to other disabilities like mine is. There's no limit of
time of long we feel worried and stress for. It can be even harder if it is linked
on to other disabilities because you feel angry not been equal to the rest of society. When you have been living with it all your life you learn to live with it
and you more calmer than you used to be and accept bad things better. We get dryness in our mouths, we feel shaky, tense, fast heart beat and we find it hard to sleep. Just because a person may not face all these things, it doesn't mean they don't stuffer from Anxiety Panic attacks are the main causes of Anxiety.

British men are three times more than likely to take their own lives than British woman.

At least 75% of people in the uk, suffer from depression, I guess that includes people with and without disabilities but I don't know for sure. Only about 3rd of people try to get help. My worry is if people keep on suffering alone they will make themselves ill. Depression affects one in five older people who live in the community, even more care homes.


Stress is the biggest killer of all for everybody maily in today's credit crunch, we are all in the same boat. Bear in mind that stress plays on a lot people's state of mind anyway, which can course Anxiety and depression when people worry too much over things. Some things just won't get out of peoples' minds or it can take a long time. For example; things from relationship and marriage break ups to death even worse paying bills which is more common that ever today. Mencap say People with learning disabilities 58 times likely to die before the age 50 but that's not in the case in everybody. Like I said Stress is a killer for all people but if you have learning disabilities or and health problems on it's own it's double the pressager.

For example; Panic attacks can also bring on Epilepsy but then with my disabilities whatever they are for sure. I was born with lack of oxygen to the brain, which caused me to have fits from birth. When I have stress or I think I have things to worry about I panic but sometimes it brings a fit on other times it doesn't. This can mainly be when I have been misunderstood or and even confused with something like information for eg; some things can make me panic then get me angry and if I get too upset it may bring on my fits, depending what the situation is and how stressful it is to me. I went 20 yrs without having a fit bit during that time I was working at Camnant a living in riding stable in Newtown powys Wales. My Boss Miss Coyne thought I was having Peta Mal fits, which I couldn't understand, I wasn't feeling unwell. She had got the doctor to put me on Tregratol tablets without my families say so. When was 20 I was so depressed with taking them for no reason I over dosed on the lot but lucky enough as you know I pulled through. My family went mad and got the doctor to take me off them. Most medications can make people depressed which are caused by the side-affects.

This is something that doctors should look into because this does not just accept the whose taking the medication but others around mainly if the medication causes the person to have behavior problems for example if someone is Moody a lot. Like I say I have written in many reports advising people to except the unaccepted in all people. That means except anything. Some people seem don't in themselves with medication others without. It's all swings and roundabouts.


Even most good things can be stressful for example; taking exams and waiting for exam results is another example even though on the other hand it could get me through life. I am very keen person if I fail I just keep going but despite of the panic it causes me, which is part of disability, I cope somehow. This can happen in any ones' case not just mine.

When Anxiety links to Autism is when change happens mainly when something can either
shock or even surprise a person. Good change a little bit of time to get used to as well as bad change. Anxiety is the reason why I am writing about Autism again. It
can make us more upset if we have different information on one thing off two or even
several different people. Autism is a life time disability and some people even call it a disorder. Most of us with Autism have learning disabilities. We find it hard to social interact, communicate. We find it hard not to let things get to us, which is
part of our Anxiety. Anxiety also kicks in when a person doesn't feel sure of themselves and the rest the world around them. When something is new whether it's good or bad to friendships/ relationships and or someone has died. For eg; Broken up relationships and deaths can make you feel depressed and as well as angry. Depression can make you feel very low in yourself, lose interest in everything, not wanting to talk to people, a mixer of feeling lonely and wanting to be on ones' own, smoking a lot, drinking a lot, taking drugs, feeling useless and as if the whole world is against you and not wanting to live anymore. Some of us pull out of it, try to help ourselves and get help like counselling for eg; whereas others give up on themselves.

Asperger Syndrome is a foam of Autism in people who have high intelligence but it's also a hidden disability, which means people don't see the problems people have. If
you spend a lot of time with us you will learn that we need more help than you thought. Yet we don't have difficulties in languages. Like expect the unexpected
because these disabilities, illnesses, conditions and disorders can affect different
people in different ways. I have found that I have got better than I used to be since
I have got older but it has been a very slow journey but I don't stop believing in myself and others like me.

Some of us like to spend more time alone, others like people round and some of us can feel like I do a bit of both.
We find it hard to understand people's thoughts and feeling, which may seem selfish but then I am better than I used to be.
We behave in a strange manner without been aware but I have found since I have got older I become more worried and more aware of it knowing off people I've known all
my life have told me.
This can be why we can find hard to make friends but that get better from my experience the more I have been aware of my Autism.
Be also aware of poor eye contract.

Communication Little language, speaking in the same tone, unable to understand meanings of gesture and facial expression, hard to understand jokes, mixing up words like you and I, repeating what they say or and what other people say.
Flapping hands, twirling toes, fixed on the same route round our lives, getting upset by change, sensitive to sound, smell, touch and etc, misunderstanding peoples' thoughts, feelings, actions and etc. Not everyone faces the same all problems so it doesn't make them not Autism depending how many of these problems they do face.

Cause of Autism is unknown yet although in my case it's unknown whether I do
have Autism or not.I guess I'm more than likely Asperger if I am.
I guess just before the 21st century there was a case on the news about the MMR injection to protect Measles/ rubella, what I don't understand how can any learning disability a side - affect in any table, injection or any medicines and ect? If I do have Autism it is caused by what I was born lack of oxygen to the brain so I guess it's possible that MMR causes Autism Spectrum if that's the case.

Family history.

My Mother and me different ages of my early life.


My Mother's name is Jane Gorman and my Father's name is Malcolm Marriet, he likes to be called Max's not  Malcolm. My parents met at the Wolverhampton Bowel ling Alley in 1968. My Mother was 16 and my Father was 22,  he'd just finished the Merchant Navy as a cook. They only lasted about 12 mouths together. January 1969, they found out I was on the way, which a big shock to everyone. Mum was a ballet dance teacher while she was carrying me. She taught a child named Sara, which is how she got my name from. Dad moved to London and married someone over there, that lasted 15 years. My half brother Jay was born January 1978. It wasn't only hard on Mum having a child with disabilities but also been a unmarried Mother and her Mother's marriage was breaking down very badly. I think it made my Mother quite strong in the end. Single families were very rare so it was a sin too be too young to have a child and not be married. Now it is more accepted for each child to have different Fathers.

Not long after my birth my Mum became a bar maid at the Giffther Arms pub in Wolverhampton. Later on she was a Manager res of the Wolverhampton Sports and Social club on the B'ham New road, which she enjoyed for many years. Her boss John Russian sent her to work in London, Santa Pod and Derby as a bar maid.
Later she marriage my first step Dad Roy in August 3rd 1984, my step sister Holly was born January 1983, Mum and Roy parted in 1993 and divorced 2003. She marriage for the 2nd time to Warren August 2009.

My great Grandmother's name was Elizabeth Kendrick, she had eight children my Nan was the oldest. There were three girls and five boys. Since Nan died in 2007, there's now two girls five boys. When the 2nd world war 1939 to 1945 broke out my Nan was 8 years old, Nan had to look after the ones who were born at the time because great Gran and Granddad Tom worked very long hours. Great Gran worked in a Sewing factory and great Granddad made Bomb shelters. There were no washing machines, Microwaves and etc like there is today. There could be still a good many back to back houses during the war. No central heating but gas and coal fires.You could still feel very cold drafts under the doors.

In those days great Gran was tall and blond and great Granddad had a thick mass of curly hair but his later years he went bald and he was always thin. He smoked about 40 Woodbine's a day, he loved his garden, tea, arm chair and sleep. He loved it when I rubbed cold tea on his head when I was little because he left his tea far too long. He said to my Nan.

" Let, I'm sure that child has made my hair grow back."

Great Gran and Granddad had only been around 4 years of my life to see me before they both died. I can't remember a lot. I remember walking on Granddad's garden patched without any shoes on socks on. He was growing flowers and veg. Suddenly a bee sting my foot as I screamed he picked me and told that's why I couldn't use his soil as a sandpit. He was more worried about than his flowers and veg. Nan always said he was very fond of me.

Great Gran's last job was a cleaner at the Express & Star Queen Street Wolverhampton. She'd push me in a Sliver Cross pram and dress me up in bonnets and bows. In her later years she was a very bonnie built lady wearing a blue Flamed turned in glasses 60s style in the 70s.

My Grandparents Letty Kendrick and Ramsey Gorman married in 1949 but I don't know where. It was a marriage that started off from very tall dark, handsome and sun tanned me to spending all his wages in the pub that he needed to keep his wife and family. 20 years of marriage was more than enough for my Nan you will see as you read on.

My great Granny Fiall was Welsh and great Granddad George was Irish. Believe it or not I don't anyone knows how them two got together. Granddad George's Father was German and he was a tap dancer. Nan got on with Granddad George but not Granny Fiall. Nan said she never kept the house clean and she bet on the horses, I can't remember if Nan she said she drank heavy or not. Nan used to call her a dirty old woman. She must have been a female Step Toe, say no more. It makes you wonder how my great Granddad put with her, mind you divorces were very hard to come back then.

My Granddad bet on the horses too this why my Nan had to work extra hours to feed and clothe Mum and Auntie. Nan ended up wasting loads of food because Granddad never came home from the pub when he promised to. He spoke to Nan with his fists. Nan divorced him after 20 years. My great Grandparents said.

" Your should have divorced him sooner, Let."

As adults Mum and Auntie Vicky must have found it hard to trust people after they had seen what their Father had put their Mother through. I guess it was too easy to feel over protected over your own family, They mainly were with me because of my disabilities.

More or less than 40 years ago support was very little. The only benefit around was Child benefit. Nappies were Terry toweling so if your child had a weak bladder like I had, you were washing nappies for a very long time.I must have been at least five or more when I stopped wetting the bed.

I must have been just after my great Grandparents died when Uncle David my Nan's brother took the family to the caravan in Wales about 1974 to 1975. I think I may have just started school. I had Me seals or chicken poxes. Uncle David only drove as far as the Victoria hotel, which is now the Britannia hotel. I suddenly said.

" Are we nearly there?"
" Are we nearly there?"

Two years before my Mother was born, Nan had a son named Tony. He never lived to have children, sisters, nieces, nephews and etc. Tony would have been 60 last May. Nan said she never forgot when she poked a nappy in his belly by mistake. That haunted her for the rest of her life, she never forgave herself.
One day Nan found Tony choking in his cot, he had German Me seals in his throat and he was fitting. In those days cot deaths were very common and hard to treat. He either dead a week before or after his 1st birthday around the 9th May 1951. Nan died June 2007, she wanted her ashes over him so she got her wish because the family did just that.