Back to poetry more poems to put on old and new.

The single rose.

When the wind blows it opens one single rose.
When the rain comes down the whole roses are very washed down.
When spring has just started lovers have ran.
When summer is on it's way lovers pick roses everyday. September 1997

Lovers.

Eating ice cream on a hot summer's day in the park.
Eating fish and chips, kissing and hugging wrapped up warm on a cold winter's night in the dark.

Eating pop corn in the back seat on the back row hugging the night away.
Drinking in the pub getting drunk, hugging and kissing September 1997

I hope you feel the same as I do.

I am sitting writing poetry about you.
Thinking about you as I do.
You love me like I love you.
Your not only my lover but my best friend.
What happens happens.
I can't except it to happen forever but never say never. 8.9.2002

September.

September is a mouth blowing in the wind.
September can be also warm.
Most Septembers can be cold.
Lovely India summers can happen. 12/9/2002

Molly.

Molly my longest friend.
Can't say she's my oldest friend but best friend.
Twenty to thirty odd years of knowing her since school.
Always be my best friend, we have known one another long enough.
There's no friend like Molly. 8/9/2002

War.

Protecting yourself from gas and smoke with a gas mask.
Bombs going off and going mad.
Boots getting stuck in the mud.
Sore wounds as one moves from place to place.
Hoping and dreaming that the war will be soon over to give love and peace.
Young men and woman been poised by gas.
Worrying about losing loved ones. 7/9/2002

I love you madly.

Hello my lovely laddie, I Love you so madly.
I hope you don't leave me so sad.
Why I am I so mad as a lass to meet such a lad?

I may as well lose love from start to end.
One way or the other I will manage to be loved again and dumped again.
I once ended up with a laddie who went off with another.
We fell in love for two and a half years, after that I had so many fears.
It took me a long time to move on, now gladly and madly I love another laddie. 1997 - 2000

The voice of homeless people.

I can't cope any longer, I don't have any money to live on.
I keep on feeling sick because I am not eating a lot.
Please save my life!
Please give me a home!
Please me a job and career!
Please give me a normal life like all of you! 1997 - 1998


What has it done to my life?

When I go into a relationship, I fall in love too easy.
I know I dream and hope for too much for the future.
I should take things day by day.
I need to accept that break ups happens, I can't help this when I love someone.

When my relationships end I always seem to go to pieces because it hurts so much.
It's as if the whole world has crashed on top of me.
Sometimes I have felt as if something has been missing in life. 4.7.2000


I live in hope.

I live in hope that I won't you like I lost the rest of them.
I live in hope that I will hear your voice on the telephone.
There is not time that I don't think about you or miss you.

You don't have to fear me, I won't give you a hard time.
I love my freedom and space.
Most of all I love you for you.
The time we spend apart the more I enjoy seeing you.
My fear is losing you but then nothing lasts forever.
I love you so much so much.
I fear because I want to carry with what we have got. 28.8.2000

I'm in love but I have space.

No ties on my life and no strings attracted.
I am still faithful.
I love partner and he loves me.
We can trust each other too. 28.8.2000


I have no fear.

I have no fear of trust.
There's a lot about you that makes me feel as if I can trust you.
I love you for you.
In my mind there's no one like you.
When I am without you, I miss you so much.
Now I am brave enough to cope without you.
It does not matter to me what life is like and how hard it is nothing or no one will put me off you.
Please get some sleep while you can with you working all night long.
I don't want anything to happen to you.
I'd rather miss you because your working than knowing that I am not going to see you again. 28.8.2000 onwards.


In your dreams.

Once a upon a time, I knew you for two and a half years which seemed like a life time.

Thinking back you were not knowing.
I know the truth hurts but not as much as you hurt me.
Why has it taken you so long to knew that you made a mistake leaving me in the first place?

Well it's only your own loss.
If only you had not hurt me in the first place, you know now that you hurt the wrong woman.

Don't ever think if she leaves you that you can come back to me.
You must accept that nothing can be the same again.

Things will get worse for you not better, you would either up end living with a nasty old woman or you could end up being a lonely old man.
It's far too late now.

If you still love me, please leave me to love a man who will love me for me not what he can get out of me.

If you don't love me, why should I be bothered, I don't love you either. 25.6.2000


Are you lucky or not?

If you met a nice girl I hope you don't hurt her like you hurt me.
I hope you won't hurt her at all.

Who is this unlucky girl who you are lucky enough to have?
Is she out there for you?
What is her name?
She is brave enough with you but will she put with you as long as I did?
If you are lucky enough please don't let her down like you let me down. 25.6.2000


I love you and I know you love me.

I love you and I know you love me.
I have that loving feeling that we are meant to be.
I love your lovely dark hair, those lovely brown eyes stick out a mile.

It's so sad I can't see a tiny bit more of you.
I just want to make it clear to you that my feelings are very strong towards you.
I hope we are right for one another.

To me you are a love waiting for, I hope I am right in thinking that.
You are very special to me.
No other male has made me feel like you do. 26.6.2000

You and me.

Ups and downs may well happen time after time but good and bad is excepted to be.
At the end of the day we are strong for one another.
There's not a day goes by that we don't think of one another. 2000 - 2001


I can't live with or without love.

Why don't I see you, I miss you badly.
Go back to work, I'm only joking.
When I am without you I miss you so much as much as it hurts.
When I am with you I can't leave you alone.
Never the less the more I don't see the stronger our love is. 2000 - 2001


Flashes of lighting.

The clack of lighting flashing of white sparks.
Rain running and rushing so fast in the middle of the night faster than water running out the tap.
Wet hair and clothes. 8.9.2002

I had time to heel.

I cried my eyes out that cold winter's night when you left.
It seemed so long I thought it was good.
When you walked back in my life on that Hot summer's night that was when I saw the light.
We loved for so long yet we had so long apart.
After you had been gone for so long I thought you'd stop loving me for good.
I found myself in the end putting a brave face on just to show I was strong. 20.1.2002

Nothing stops me.

I am feeling tired and unwell but nothing stops me from enjoying life.
Now I accepts the turns I have that is part of my life.
I love studying, working, writing and being with the man I love so much.
I love going out drinking every now and then. 20.1.2002

My mind is blank.

My mind is blank.
My eyes are tired but I can't sleep.
I want to write but I don't know what to write.

It's winter time, it's so cold and I want you to keep me warm.
I feel lazy to do anything, please keep me warm. 20.1.2002

Advice in poetry.

Absence makes the heart grow founder.
If you see too much of one another you fall apart.
Longer time a part : longer time together.

Action speaks louder than words.
Never promise what you can't do.
Never say one thing than do another.
Always let someone know if you change your mind.

An apple a day keeps the doctor away.
Eat something healthy everyday.
Eat fruit, meat vegetables or fish.
Have at least a little exercise is the main thing.

What makes a man healthy and wise, as long as you keep yourself alive?
As you get older you should get wiser.
Why worry about having not enough money when you just have enough to live on?
Why ask for too much when some people have nothing at all?
Little bit of what you fancy does not do you any harm.

As you make your bed you can lye in it.
If you have a chance in life take it.
Don't play around, one can only stand so much.
You won't be left off the hook forever.

A bird in hand is worth two in the brush.
Be happy with what you have got, you don't need anymore.
One love is enough don't be greedy!
Don't date someone and promise to date another at the same time.

You can't always get what you want.
If you learn to live with not getting what you want, you will get what you want.
It comes to those who wait.

Early to bed : early to rise.
When you go to bed : you should wake up full of life.
20.1.2002

Lying to rest.

Long lasting love on earth.
May be that kind of love will be in heaven.
Love is here in memory.
Rest in peace.
No arms to hold one tight.
Keep each other warm on the winter nights.
You can get out to cool down in the summer.
Love over heats in summer.
To be brave.
To died for us.
Without you we would not be born. 8.9.2002


How lucky we are.

We have a home to live.
We may have a family.
We may be lucky to education and a job.
We must not depend on families all the while.
We must fly the nest ; our families have bought us up. 29.5.2002

Verse one.

Never leave what you can do.
One reason or another there are people the streets begging for money.
How we tell the people who really need money?
Are some people too lazy to get a job?
Life is what you make it 29.5.2002


Get off the streets!

Get off the streets and find yourself a home, education and a job!
There's no need to be homeless.
Most of you have had normal lives in the past.
Why put your life on hold because you have had some disappointment?
If you look forward don't look back.
People will help you if you help them.
Never attention seek just for the sake of it, otherwise people will get fed of it if you them for money all the while.
No one likes feeling used but no one likes being misunderstood, it should not be all one sided.
There's no need to beg for money, wait for people to give you, it comes to those who wait.
That way you will gain more friends.
If you keep asking you don't get.
Most people don't have that much money themselves, they get fed up of been ask all the while.
If you have an education and job use it!
Help people who need more help.
People who are on the streets for disappointing reasons but some people are there to make they are because they don't want to work, we need to look out for the reasons why most people are. 29.5.2002

Outsiders.

It's cold outside, no bed to keep warm.
Saw logs off the tree, get lighters and matches to light a fire.
Feel hungry so cook food on the fire.
The winter nights are dark and lonely.
You need someone to talk to.
You need a home.
The street floors are hard to sleep on.
You are lucky to get a cardboard box, which is as bad as the floors, a bed would be better. 29.5.2002

Today is hard for families.

If you have the sense don't have children, it's a unkind world out there today.
Life is mostly unkind us without been unkind to others.
The future is worry for us let alone them.
If we are not allowed to teach our children right from wrong, what's the point?
Leaning did not do us any harm.
Children are lovely but they don't know what's right and wrong until they are taught.
How much worse can it get, if it's like this today what will it be like tomorrow?
We are just left with a load of crime and Anti - social behavior in today's society. 21.4.2002

Today's society.

Never be too kind to people.
They will want off you all the time.
Always turn your head to see who is behind you.
Be careful : never be too careful.
Enjoy your life : you only have one life.
Don't live in fear but always be on your guide. 21.4.2002


Children are not children, they grow up.

Cutting teeth, having colds, growing pains, tears, happiness broken hearts, relationships, friends and lovers letting them down, worrying about their safety in today's cruel world mainly in society, hoping and wishing them to enjoy their live safely.

Are you going to have children?
They are a worry and a heart all their lives and yours.
This makes this society very scary.
It would be lovely to be able to say your only on this earth once so make the most of it, it's not easy to enjoy yourself today in this cruel and unsafe society.




You can never be too careful, life goes on.
Never let it stop you from living a life, you'd be locking yourself behind closed doors otherwise.
Children are not children, they grow up too fast.
As soon as you turn round, they have lives of their own.

Make the most of children they are not children for long.
Children grow even faster now than before in this fast world.
Every day, every hour, every mouth and every week and every year keeps ticking away from us.

There should be love, care and tenderness.
Never wait until it's too late.
Every child achieves an award in his or her's own way.
Every child gives you ups and downs in their own way.
There should be always something everyday in different ways.

Every human being has a heart of gold in different ways.
When children grow up some built nests and become parents themselves.
Sometimes life gets too much, families can care for us so much it's hard for them to let go. 10 . 12 . 2001

You only have one life.

You only live on this earth once.
Within reason you can do what you want.
You can only get one chance in life so don't blow it!
If you live twice you come back as a different person or even an animal.
Make the most of life because it sails so fast before you know it.
Try not to do anything to regret in later life.
Never think you can turn back the clock because you can't.
Think very carefully before you do anything.
If you get another chance to take anything again, take that chance don't blow it!
Try not to make the same mistake loads of times over.
Your a fool if you don't take a chance for anything while you can. 10.12.2001


Find my work when I am dead and gone.

My work is here to read.
What you think of my work is up to you.
If money comes it will go to my family, lovers and friends.
I must take no notice of the press, I must write for my readers.
When I am dead and gone, have what you want of mine.
If anyone is interested in my work, you are more than welcome.
I just enjoy putting pen to paper, I just help for it to be understood and to make sense.
The words I write on paper come to my mind. 5.12.2001


The days of hard times.

No homes for the poor.
Millions of people living on the streets.
No work to earn money.
People eating food that could and even find.
Millions of people's lives have lived and died through been homeless.
Children going down chimneys sweeps to earn money.
Young men breathing the coal mines to earn money for their wives and families.
Some things may have got better but nothing is completely right. 5.12.2001

Quiet.

Now it's quiet at midnight and I can write.
Millions of people sleeping on the street as I write sitting in my home.
The wind is blowing a storm, there's nothing quiet about that when the people living on the street are trying to sleep.
I will just put anything down on paper about the storm.
I must turn on my lamb to give me the light.
I will sleep until the morning light.
As a student I will study in the day light.
To write on a winter's night is anything that comes to mind. 5.12.2001

Stacey from ' THE HAPPY SOCIETY ( she was!)

Stacey was full of life and free to do what she wanted.
Stacey had so many friends and so many people to see.
Stacey shared the same birthday as me October 24th, she wrote poetry just like me and she had Autism like me.
Every year my birthday comes round I think of Stacey.
The sad thing is that I never saw any of her poems and Stacey never any of mine.
I don't know what kind of poems she wrote and she did not know what kind of poems I write and wrote in the case may.
In my eyes a poet never dies : a poet's work lives on.
Poets who live in heaven look down on you while you read their work.
Stacey is still with us even though she's in heaven.
I believe Stacey is watching me write poetry.
There will be plenty of young and new poets to be but not like Stacey, Stacey is my best friend.
Little do we know how short life is until it's gone.

Stacey had so much in common with me even though she was and still is in my eyes about twelve younger than me.

I am so much older than Stacey was, she was only her early 20s.
I am so lucky to reach my 30s.

Stacey had plenty of male and female friends, she was friends with you if you were friends with her.
Stacey made you laugh, she made the Happy Society the Happy Society.
Everyone looked forward to going to the Happy Society when Stacey was there.
Stacey was too young to go to heaven, the Happy Society became Sad Society without Stacey.
Why Stacey, why not me she was younger than me?
She went to college in London for her poetry lessons.
Stacey had such a string of boyfriends, no one could count them. 26.5.2002

Memory to remember.

One hundred English people had been killed in the America war.
As you may image that everyone was angry and upset.
There was such nasty damage to America a lovely country.
Two brothers were aboard hijacked Untied 175, which crashed in into word trade.
Some people even died pentagon. 12.9.2002

Life one.

I hope you have not got a crush me.
I am very fond of you as a friend.
I don't want us to hurt one another.
You have plenty of time to find happiness, you are so young.
You are fifteen years younger than me.
Age may not matter but it's your future you need to think about in a grown up manner.
You may not understand what I mean because you are so you but you will one day.
I was young like you once, I used to have these feeling towards people but I got over it.
Love does not always happen how you want it to be, we live miles apart in life and age.
When you get to my age you will know what it's all about.
You will live and learn, you never stop learning right from wrong through adult life then you get older and wiser, this works well for most of us anyway. 9.5.2002


Don't get me wrong.

It's very flattering to be fancied by someone as lovely as you.
Don't take it the wrong way, I am about fifteen years older than you.
I'd get done for going with very young boys like you, I know you are nearly a young man.
I am almost a middle age woman even though I may look as young as you.
A woman of my age should know better.
You may think that I could teach you a few things, believe me you could end up teaching me a few things, you will learn faster than me through everyday life.
You make mistakes in life then learn from them, at least most of us do.
Some of us make the same mistake loads of times like I have done so what could I teach you?
I have just had to learn without no computers, mobile phones but everyday life.
You have mobile phones, computers, everyday live and etc to learn from.
I think will learn better without me, I have made too many of own mistakes, what do I know if I can't get things right myself?
Without you knowing it, you know more about life than I do.
You most likely be teaching me more so than I would be teaching you.
It just does not feel right someone young teaching someone old.
I have been around far too longer than you, I should know more than you but that's not always the case. 9.8.2002


Homeless old people.

No one to talk.
No children, no Grand children, no Great Grand children.
Far too cold, there needs to be warm.
Nowhere to cool down from the hot sun when your near enough passing out.
Not knowing what tomorrow is going to bring. 29.5.2002

We are all together.

Getting together for a drink and a talk.
People finding out from one another how they got on the streets in the place.
How are they going a normal life?
How are they going to live through the world of the four seasons in one?
Winter cold, snow, rain, sleet, hale and sun.
Autumn cold winds blowing leaves as they change colors
off the trees on to the ground.
Spring is meant to be warm not cold but it does not seem to be the case anymore.
There are very few leaves on the trees that are green but it happens bit by bit until the summer on sun baying hot days.
More green leaves on the trees and a lovely garden life homeless people may talk about. 9.5.2002


I am so sorry it can't happen my friend.

I hope I have not lost your friendship.
I hope I have not hurt you.
I still care about you and look out for you.
Your so young and I am old enough to be your Mum.
It would not be fare on either of us if we got together.
I am sure you would get fed of me one day anyway.
One day you will find someone more special, I am not special at all only special needs.
I am just too old to look at. 9.5.2002


Memory of Eddie dog.

He was so fluffy.
He was so soft.
He was only nasty if anyone hurt us.
Me and my family were the people who knew him and loved him.
He went to another home where he's well looked after, we are just too busy with our lives to look after him.
He loved to play ball.
He loved to go out for walks.
He loved to run across the park.
He hated been on a lead because he was a country and farm dog.
He would pull you around so hard and fast when he had his lead on.
He would only attack if he saw strangers.
Eddie, where have you gone?
I understand why you left us, we could not give you the happiness you wanted.
We are so sorry to let you down, I hope you are happy now.
Never forget us for the happiness we gave, we hope we gave some happiness.
We are always thinking about you, you are a lovely dog. 25.1.2002 - 12.9.2002


The America war.

It was the day I never forget.
On September 11th 2001, I think everyone thought the world was over.
It was 9.00am in UK and 3.00am in US time or the other way round.
It hit New York and Washington.
It was a dramatic explosion that hit nine people pulled out alive.
A fireman had been on the 38rd floor of one of the towers of New York. 12.9.2002

My feelings.

The war of America did not sink into me at first.
When my Father told me on the phone, I thought I was hearing things and I thought I was having a nightmare.
I put on the news on the television, watch those two towers full down turned my stomach over just watching them and I felt sick.
I found it very hard to write anything down at first.
I know there has been bad wars before but I would say that's the first one I have seen in my life time.
I could not talk, I could not stop thinking about it. 12.9.2002


What a mess.

The two towers of New York had gone through bombing planes.
They were very tall towers, I am sure those towers must have took a long time to build.
I feel sorry for whoever it was know who worked so hard to build those towers.
There was not just 1000s of lives lost, a lot of homes had been broken and smashed. 12.9.2002

What happened?

A fireman had been rolling down the stairwell floor by floor.
The whole building collapsed.
Five other fire fighters and police officers near enough lost their lives. 12.9.2002


Sometimes hurtful things happen for the best.


Life is here to enjoy but sometimes all good things have to come to an end.
You have plenty to look forward to but happiness may take it's time to come back.
Sadly we can't get by without making mistakes and learning from them but how many of us do?
We are only human : no one is perfect.
It may take a long time while we want to get but most of us get there in the end.
At least once if not more in our lives something will happen what we don't like, that's life for everyone.
So long down the line I hope I will be right that some disappointing things happen for the best.
Most pain can turns into happiness.
I hope you will be glad of my advice one day, I hope I will be right in some things if I am not right in all.
It will be hard for us to understand that I was once your age.
I had strong feelings towards people that I have had to learn to accept what I wanted was not possible.
When you get as old as me, you will understand that disappointing things can happen for a good reason.
The reason is you may like me a lot now but you may not like me at all in ten years time, you could get fed up of looking at an old woman like me.
This could save us quite a lot of hurt and pain.
You don't need to be tied down to someone like me. 20.8.2002


Studying poetry.

I am studying to remind myself how I can interest my readers.
Sometimes I can think of a subject others times I can't.
I don't except everyone to be interested in what I write as long some people are. 8.9.2002


I dream to be a poet.

I dream to be mostly a romantic poet.
I dream to write fiction and non fiction.
I dream to be a poet of all or many subjects.
I dream to write poetry of good and bad in life.
I dream to understand the minds of animals and human beings.
I dream to put down what goes through my mind from pen onto paper. 8.9.2002

I love the sun, sand and sea.

The hot summer not cold winter.
Not too hot just warm.
Blue sky, blue sea and yellow sand.
That says it all. 8.9.2002


Lovers part two.

Two hearts.
Four arms.
Two lips to kiss. 8.9.2002


What do I see?

In my 30s still young : not getting any younger.
A few lines under my eyes.
Not looking bad but not good either.
Trying to look the best I can.
We all getting older but not younger.
There's no good and bad in getting older only wishing we could turn back the clock and do things more different than we did but it's good going back to things it's too late to do anything about.
Sometimes life gives you another chance but other times it does not, it may teach many of us to become not just older but wiser. 8.9.2002

The winter.

The snow may look white and pretty but it's cold outside.
The evenings become gray and short:the nights become dark and long.
Dark early mornings that look like night. 8.9.2002


In bet ween the lines.

In-between the lines we live a life that could fit into poetry.
In-between the lines we live a life that we could write into stories.
In life things don't happen the same, there's could be good and bad in life, which makes our writing more interesting. 8.9.2002

The nightingale.

The nightingale the bird of love and romance.
The turtle dove who sings sweet romance songs of love.
The poet's dream is the art of love.
No broken heart : heart of love.
Passion is another way of love. 8.9.2002


The rose of love.

The red rose is the sign of romance.
To hear the song of love.
To dream about romance. 8.9.2002

Love verse.

To love to kiss one another.
To look is not always to touch one another.
To look in to each others eyes to know it right or not right in the case may be.
To sleep and dream of happiness.
For each heart to feel love.

To love on a warm sunny day under trees.
To cool down in the stream on a hot summer's day.
To love in darkness.

To enjoy the body of love.
To get close to make love.
Love is not everything to life.


You don't have to involve making love.
The main thing is loving the person for them.
You should not get just anything you want out of them.
Love, freedom and trust is important.

I like a man not too cheeky and not too shy.
I like him to talk to.
I don't like a man who thinks he knows everything.
Show off, cheat, he tells lies and he's too big for his boots those are the men I hate.10.12.2001 - 8.9.2002

Future of child.

Coping without a Father.
Mother bringing up a child or children in this unkind world.
To have family and friends to support.
Is a child strong enough to face this unkind world of fear and no enjoyment? 8.9.2002


Hope.

From heaven we are looking down to earth.
We make another life in another world work.
We become another person or an animal.
That's if you believe heaven is another world.
Life goes on.
No more crying.
Love again.
Be happy, we only live one. 8.9.2002

Animals.

Do you believe that you will come back as an animal?
For most people memories live on.
Do you believe that you come back as a human being if your an animal and an animal if your human. 8.9.2002

End of war.

Loving arms round the man you love.
No weeping and crying unless your love is not alive.
Living at peace and love at last.
The future to think about and look forward to.7.9.2002

War verse.

Feeling the future in sin and alone.
Death and live is so cruel.
Blood and burns is what you saw.
It was not all sad times.
Happiness, dancing, sing and having a good time to hide the sadness of the war away with the hurts and losses of life.
Memories of love.
Tears of the future and past.
The wounded survivors.
Cradle the war babies to sleep.
Feel angry about the war. 8.9.2002


Freedom at last.

Sleep in peace.
What a horror of war.
What a emptiness without love.
Life goes on, it hurts, we will get by.
Lucky for the ones who have the men they love. 7.9.2002

Poets.

We are poets.
We see you.
We hear you.
We feel you.
We smell you.
We taste you.
We touch you.
None of these things you don't do to us.
Keats, Wordsworth, Thomas, Eliot and many more.
They may not be here : there work still lives on.
In memory and love, they will always be here with us. 8.9.2002


Let's let words flow.

If the words rhyme, they rhyme.
If the words don't rhyme, they don't rhyme.
As long as words make sense that's the mail thing. 8.9.2002

Lucky.

Lucky to be alive.
We go through good and bad through life.
Lucky enough not to suffer : lucky enough to live through whatever happens in life. 8.9.2002

Write to tap words out on computer.

It's very hard to about words to write to tap to type on computer.
It can be hard to think about a subject to write about without having to research.
You can't always put pen to paper right away : sometimes you can.
Sometimes something going into your head to put down paper.
Sometimes it comes out wrong : other times it comes out right. 8.9.2002

Great Granny.

The Great Granny who loved me so much.
The Great Granny who never thought I could no wrong.
No memory of anything else other than her bonny body and bonny smiling face.
She wore those blue turned in glasses that she wore in the 1960s.
Why could not she lived a few years later so I could remember her?
I would have at least would have known her a bit more than I did. 8.9.2002

Coal.

Men going down the coal mines.
In hale dust and dirt.
Young children far too young.
Living on portage, bread and water.
Going to bed early at night and facing very early hours of the mornings.
Having been frightened of been stuck down the mines.
Young men and young boys risked their lives to feed their families, many of them did die.
Still they had to do the job to keep their families alive.
What a cruel life it was. 8.9.2002

Drinking too much.

Enjoying drinking at the time.
It's fun and alright on the night.
Up and down to the toilet.
Feeling rough the next day.
Ringing work with a bad hang over.
Can't eat and frightened of being sick.
The after affects are not fun not like when your drinking at the time. 8.9.2002

Why do I write?

I enjoy writing to put pen to paper.
Any subject that comes to mind.
I hope I interest my readers at the time. 8.9.2002

I want to help people.

I want to help people who are alone.
I want to talk to people who are worse off than me.
Each and everyone of us have problems one way or the other : some people have problems than others.
Some people are homeless others are not.
I am very lucky, I want help people who want to be helped but if I can help.8.9.2002


Help.

Help get the homeless off the streets!
Help to stop the sunshine burning them!
Help to keep them out the cold on cold winter's night.8.9.2002

Last chance.

I have given you your last chance to be.
I did not except to be loving you again, it just happened because I love you so much.
Your forgiven this once but hurt me again no matter how hard it hurt me to let you go, I will have to let you go.

How lucky you are to get me back, you have taken this chance.
Don't let me don't because there will be no going back.
You only live once, you will end up a lonely old man if you let me down again.

If you are not careful someone else could step into your shoes, you don't want that do you?
Whatever came over you to go off with her in the first place?
Whatever has got into me to go back to you?
The answer is that I love you.

What does it matter what happened in the past, now we will look to the future.
I look into your eyes, I knew too well that we knew each other so well.
Now that I am back in your loving arms, I hope that this is where I belong.
I hope you are here with me to stay otherwise you can go away.

My heart and mind can only write about whether our love is right or wrong.
This is how I feel about you, my love is strong enough for you but please be honest with me if you can't stay with me.

Sometimes action speaks louder than words.
When hurt me you told me how you felt at the time about me.
You made it very clear that you did not love me anymore.
You were the only man I loved, I still do.
You locked my heart now you have opened it back again.
I have always held the key for you, rightly or wrongly I always will but not if you hurt me and lock my heart again. 8.9.2002


Lonely.

I am so lonely without you.
I don't know anyone without you.
Just like you I have been put on this earth for a reason.
Where do I come from?
Who do I belong to?
Who am I?
Someone talk to me!
Someone help me get through this hard life? 29.5.2002

Time goes slow.

Time goes slow when nothing is going on.
Time goes slow when you are waiting for something to happen.
Still things to make you happy comes to those who wait.
Nothing worth the wait comes quickly.

When you don't want anything to happen it happens too quickly.

I wish I could eat and sleep, it's taking so long.
I am tossing and turning in bed.
I love you so much, I can't wait to see you, it's not long until I do see you but it feels like forever as I love you so much.
I don't understand what's wrong with me.
Things to worry me or is it just inside my head?
I just need to wait until I see you tonight. 20.1.2002




Hunting horse.

Hunting horse of the night.
The birds flying at such a height.
The army running out to fright for their country and their lives.
Ships sailing on the rough sea on a rough windy night not a pretty site.
Hunting for food for children and wives. 8.9.2002


Life two.

Bare winter trees without leaves.
Summer starting and ending so quickly.
No flowers in a glass, just mud.
Loads of snow or no snow to make a snowman.
Birds not to be seen, only robins singing as they fly and flap their wings.
Other birds keep themselves warm hiding until the spring.
Children playing in the snow passing the days away into the Christmas holidays.
Christmas bells ringing and people singing for the white Christmas season.
Keep your eyes closed children Father Christmas is on his way to give your presents on Christmas day. 8.9.2002


Putting on a brave face.

I used to sit with my head in my hands.
I wanted to hide away from the world.
I did not want to hear or seen the world anymore.
I felt like knocking my head on the brick wall.
When I lost the man I loved so much, I found it so hard to move on.
When people looked at me, I always thought I'd done something wrong. 25.1.2002


The way to live.

Rest
food
breath
warmth
love 8.9.2002


Picking myself up.

I felt as if the whole world was coming down on me.
I never thought I'd get used being with and without the one I love.
I never thought he's love me again.
It was hard to love someone else after loving him so long.
Deep down I knew I loved him.
He was so lucky to get me back, if I did not love him I would not have gone back.
It was hard to put a brave face on.
It's hard to stop loving him. 25.1.2002


You.

You bring me happiness.
You give me love.
You tell me wonderful things that I dream about every night.
You give me lovely thoughts to think about the day.
Hoping that our future lies together.
I hope our love will grow every day in every way.
To have fun and romance with you is all I want to do. 8.9.2002


Words.

To sound sweet music.
Resting by a warm fire.
Sleep to dream about nice things.
Riding a horse through the water on a hot summer's day.
Some dreams come true but others don't.
The cool warm air is so good for you.
In the winter the river is flowing dry through the cold, in the summer flows wet again.
Words could mean anything from the heart and mind.
Words can be said or and written down without thinking about it most of the time. 8.9.2002


The weather.

The sunshine
The blowing wind
The stars of the night
The voice that egos through the wild wind of the night.
Being sheltered under the hut from rain.
The gates blowing back and to from the wind.
No wild wind or rain, it's time to play.
I hear someone calling me.
Day light there's not a star in the sky but may be a cloud in the sky.
The shadow is following me.
Who could it be? 8.9.2002


To feel.

I need to feel I am next to you.
I love you.
You are mine to be.
I've known you far too long to stop loving you.
Your face is with me when I don't see you.
I remember you all the time. 8.9.2002

Me.

Sometimes I feel alone.
I don't always feel happy.
This is not over I just don't feel well.
You can't be happy all the time but you can't be sad all the time.
I am happy with you. 8.9.2002


Time to sleep.

When it's time to sleep, I dream nice things about you.
I don't want a lot of money, just enough for food, clothes, etc and to be with you.9.4.2002


The Queen Mother.

Queen Mother of England's Mum, Granny, great Granny and friend to us all.
Most of us may not like the Royals, she was the mail lady to love in this generation.
She was a very special for us, who worked and lived through the two world wars.
In health and wealth, not many of us will live as long as she did.
There would not be this world without her.
It's seem strange without her but she lived to be a good age 1001.
I hope she will rest in peace.
She has earned her sleep.
She will be missed by us all. 9.4.2002

Children of today.

You can never bring your children up how you were bought up, you'd be breaking the law.
It's not easy because some children can push you over the edge.
What is the world coming to?
World war 3.
There's no respect for any of us. 2002 onwards.


Epilepsy.

If this is not epilepsy again, what is it?
Why have I not felt well for twelve mouths or so?
What's wrong with me?
My head is aching like someone has put a bomb inside it.
I keep getting electric shock, storms like water mixing with wires.
I have been feeling sick, dizzy, shaky and my head feels heavy.
Flashing lights are worse and when the sun gets into my eyes.
When opening my eyes, it's like my eyes flicker at anything flashing as if I am going blind.
Loud knocks and fire works scar the life out me, I jump out my skin on Bonfire night. 26.5.2002


My love.

My love is lost completely without you.
My future is nothing without you.
When I lost you it was true, I was having a nightmare.
I could never see what was going to happen.
I did not know where I was going to end up.
I can't get lost again : I have found you again.
I needed you more when you were not there but still your here now.
How did we find and lose one another in the first place?
Now that you are back I am very happy again.
How did we met to love again?
It just happened, I am so glad it did.
I hope you are here to stay this time. 26.5.2002

Life three.

It makes you wonder why we were ever born.
It makes you wonder why there is a world.
Is there a god in this world, if so where is he?
He makes people then breaks people.
Why does he bother at all?
He just waists his own hard work.
I remember my childhood and teenage years as if it was yesterday.
Yesterday has gone, now it's today, it's come and gone too quickly.
When I was twenty- three I started writing my life story.
It's taken me a long time to write one single line.
My memory and mind goes blank to know what to write all the time. 26.5.2002

A change from poetry.

I have dug out some short stories I have written over the years may be you could call it pieces of writing that has not been published because I am not sure whether it's good or not. Before I start with my pieces of writing I think I lie because I just one poem that could be a long poem or it could be a piece of writing depending how you want to look at. This first of piece is what I did on a Creative writing course.

Cat and owner.

The cat smelled a tin of whiskers' Super meat' as he was eating it while his owner drank a pint of lager, faggots, chips and peas.

The cat stared at his owner as if to say.

" Your food looks better than mine."

When they had both finished their food, the owner of the cat took off his Docs off his as he put on his slippers as he sat in the chair and put his feet on the poof.

He sat the cat on his lap.

The smell of food from both of them was still around.

The cat got off his owner's lap as he heard a nose, he looked through the window, shot through the open window as he saw a angry dog with sharp teeth who attacked him.

The owner put his coat, shoes and went to the pub for another pint of larger.
The cat became very restless while he was out.

so Mr Owner took off his coat and jumper, suddenly he saw his cat in the pub with his fur covered with blood so he took his cat home and called the vet.

The morning he bought a parrot, who kept on telling him that he had too much beer. Mr Owner put his feet up, he had not shut the cage well enough so he peaking the slippers of Mr Owner's feet while he was a sleep.

He bought the cat some fish then put it in a dish so Mr Owner ended up eating fish and chips.

For reason at night time the cat was restless wanting to in and out. Mr Owner called him a pain.

Up to date Cinderella.


Up to date Cinderella lived in a flat on Merry Hill, Warstones Wolverhampton, it was no castle. Up to date Cinderella always seemed to be in rags, she never seemed to have a fella. Her Mother always seemed to nag about doing the house work. That's all she did, she never seemed to have a life of her own. She never seemed to have any other clothes.

The up to date Fairy God Mother bought up to date Cinderella some very nice clothes, short tops, mini skirts, a black dress, black tights and a fur coat. It was a cold night so up to date Cinderella wore a black dress, tights and not forgetting black shoes.

" Where am I going up to date Fairy God Mother?"

" your going to the Waggon and Horses on the Cannock road."

" That's a bit common but it's better than no where at all."

" Like hell it is up date Cinderella, you will be traveling on the Travel West Midlands bus."

" Oh well that's nether polish or common?"

" Who will I be meeting by the way?"

" You will be able to get to know a group of people."

Up to date Cinderella caught the 6.00pm to the rough bus in Wolverhampton, then she was off on 6.30pm bus to the Cannock road. The up to date Fairly God Mother introduced up to date Cinderella to a lot of people but she saw Prince Spanish Anthonio giving her the eye, she took no notice until he kissed at 11.40pm and took to the bus stop. She started to feel very merry at the end of the night.

Up to Date Cindrella's Mother went mad when she saw the drunk state she was in.

The next morning up to date Cinderella went to town to do some shopping for her Mother. She saw the handsome man waving at her as he kindly bought her back her fur coat she left in the pub the night before because she rushed off for the last bus. He asked her out for a drink and he asked her for her mobile number as well.

It turned out they were together fifteen years on and off.

Sid the talking horse.

Hi my name is Sid. I am a horse who can talk! I am a welsh Arab breed. I am very very welsh. I am a very black stallion. My height is 14 to 15 hands. I live with my owners Bill and Mary Evans. They had two grown up children Susan and Dave.

When Susan and David were children, I was an untrained horse. Susan and David learned how to ride me. Now that Susan and David are grown up I am now twenty years older which is rather old in horsey years. You human beings have longer years to get old, us animals get old quicker.

The last time I saw Susan and David was while ago, they were living here with their parents. Susan had taken me out hunting. It was a very cold and muddy winter's day during in November. Susan could not believe how dirty and muddy I was.


" What are you doing Susan?"

" I am grooming you, Sid."

" Are you exercising me Susan?"

" I have already told you that I am taking you out hunting."

" Well Susan I don't know whether I feel twenty years older or younger."

" Well Sid you may well feel old when you get going with me today, you will feel twenty years younger."

Susan picked out the mud and stones out of Sid's feet.

" Mind my frog in my feet, Susan!"

" Don't be silly Sid trust me I have been working with horses all my life."

Susan brushed the mud off my legs with my dandy brush. She used a rubber curry comb after she brushed my mane and tail with the body brush, used a dandy brush to get the mud off legs. When Susan put on my tack on my back, I felt as if I had a bath.

As Susan mounted on my back off we jolly well went. When we got to those fields there were loads of jumps. I got as far as one jump, I could not believe it.

" Oh dear sorry Susan this is not like the old days."

" Oh Sid move!"

" Oh Sid if you don't move, I will use my whip."

Suddenly Susan gave me a little tap by my girth, off I jolly well went into slow trot because I was so unfit. I had not hunted for years. Susan gave me another tap when I got across the fields I went flying across the jumps like a very young horse again. I had so much freedom because Susan was as light as a feather. I would have had even more freedom if no one was on top of me. When the jumping was over we went into a slow trot again along those very empty fields. I was feeling rather tired.

" Oh Susan I feel like retiring."

" Oh Sid you are only saying this because you can hear the horns of the hunt."

People were hunting from every farm in Wales. Off came the hunts men. Animals such as foxes, hares and rabbits. I started to feel hungry. Susan got me into gallop to stop me eating the rabbits as they ran wild. I was so glad Susan stopped because I love all animals apart from myself.

It was almost tea time at last.

" Soon be time for tea." said Susan

" At last I am so tired."

Susan had taken me to my stables, I was so hungry I could not wait for my food. I banged my feet on my stable door to hurry Susan up. I could hear the water running into the bucket from the tape at last.

" Get me a drink of water please"!

" Hang on Sid, I am on my way now."

I huffed and puffed until my water came as I carried on stamping my feet on the stable door. When the water came I drank it like a fish. It was like a human being banging a pint glass on the bar. Sometimes I wonder if I am a fish or a horse.

" Now that I have had my water, can I have my food, Susan?"

As I almost kicked the stable door in.

" I am coming Sid, I am just mixing you when I can find your bowl."

" Hurry up Susan, I can here you stirring my feed."

" Your stirring trouble you are Susan."

" Very funny, Sid."

" If I was a human man, I'd pick up my plate out of the cupboard and bang on the table until I had my tea."

When feeding was over Susan left the stable door open by mistake. I thought I'd take a walk because I was bored. I started to feel full of life again after a hard days work. I think Susan fed me too many Oats. I cantered up the top of the yard. Along came Pickle Duck as she nearly went under my feet. There were many hens got in the way too.

" You under my feet, you silly Pickle Duck."

" Oh don't talk to me like that Sid!"

I started to feel tired again so I went very slowly into a trot then a walk.

There I saw Bill and Mary's house so I thought I'd go and take a look. I'd lived near there all my life but never seen the house as I lived on the farm. Well I can't remember Bill and Mary may have took me inside when I was a foal. I knocked on the door with my hoof.

" Who is this at the door? Shouted Bill in his Welsh deep voice.

" It's me, Sid the talking horse." In my Welsh Arab voice.

" Go away Sid, you know this house is only built for human beings."

" Oh please let me in Bill!"

" Oh Bill don't be so hard on him." said Mary

Bill huffed and puffed the idea of a horse in a human's house was just madness in Bill's thoughts.

" I only want to have a look round, Bill"

" Oh go on then!"

I just lay across the rug by the high flamed roaring coal fire. It was so relaxing I kept myself warm as Mary gave me a piece of homemade bread with very thick butter. I felt very sleepy but I felt bad laying because of Bill.

I asked Mary if I could look round the house. I would not dare ask Bill. There's no way he'd let me in but Mary would. I opened the living room door with my hoof and mouth. There was a bright pink rug on the living room floor, then I opened the door going up stairs to the bedrooms.
Suddenly I saw David.

" Hello David how are you"?

" I am fine thanks Sid."

David was far too shocked to see me as he hold of my mane, took me round through the tack room at the back of the house, right back to my stable. He very kindly gave me some hay and water to see me through the night. Written in 1993.


Holiday. Day one When seven year old Susan broken up from school, Mum and Dad took her to Mar gate on the train. Susan was most surprised at the shining steel railings on the train.

" That's how trains are. " said Mum

" When is the train coming."

" About five minutes, Susan."

The engine was streaming and blasting, as the wheels were going round very fast. Susan was very excited.
While the family were waiting for the taxi to the hotel, it poured down with rain so out came the coats. The strange thing was it was so sunny at home. Everyone seemed fed up.

" What a fine break is this." said Dad
" Give it time Dave, we have only just got here!" said Mum

The taxi turned up to take them to the hotel. As soon as they were in their rooms and got their bags sorted. Susan said.

" Come Mum and Dad, let's play snap."

" That's a good idea Susan." said Dad

Suddenly the sun started to shine, it was lovely and warm. Susan was very excited again she changed her mind from playing snap to going to the beach. She wanted to see the sun and sand just like all children do.

" Let's go to the beach."

Everyone got everything ready for the beach. By the time the family got to the beach it started to rain. again. It really was a good job, they had taken their rain coats. The sea was crashing over the rocks, water was shattering, it ran through the shore and it was rushing over the cliffs. The sand was blowing in people's eyes through the heavy wind. There came the sound of thunder over the mountains.


Day two. Good morning. Dad took some trousers for Susan in case it rained. The sun shone all morning long. Dad had taken Susan out fishing with her net, with Dad's help she caught a piece of salmon for tea. Dad had skinned the fish. Susan very excited to eat the fish but she did not like it be skinned. She was not sure whether she wanted to eat the fish or not with it been alive one minute and dead the next.

Dad and Susan went for a swim. David swam along Susan with her arm bands on. The water seemed to get deeper as David held on to Susan as they swam back to the sand. On the way back the water seemed to start to get shallow as David and Susan found a treasure box while the water was a little deep. Susan opened the lid.

" Look Dad."

" Wow." said David as he looked.

David told Susan that it was old money that he used to spend as a little boy. Susan was amazed. All old sliver, gold and notes still great condition but could not be spent. It was so hard to find the history and how it got there. David took the box to the bank them his detail so they could write to tell about the money box when they found out themselves. A few weeks after the holiday David contracted the bank they told him they could not find out anything, which was sad.

In the afternoon, the family went on the ferry to France. The sea was very rough and Susan was very sick sea. David and Emily managed to get Susan a travel sick pill from the staff on the ferry. Susan felt a sleep then woke up to feel much better.
When the family got to the beach, the sun was shining in the lovely blue sky. Susan and Mum collected shells in a bucket. Mum put them into a polythene bag, so they could built sand castles, towers and sand pies.

Susan and Mum went for a swim while David had a relaxing afternoon. Susan near enough had a mouthful of sea water and spat it out, it was very salty. Susan caught crabs, cokes, whelks, and jellied eels with a fishing net. When they came back David went fishing.

The weather had got better compared with the first day they came. It was a very shocking storm first day on the beach.


Day three. Good morning. David got out his motor boat while Emily and Susan were enjoying swimming in the sea. It was very much the same kind of day as day two. It was just a very happy family holiday. Susan did not want to go anywhere else but the beach. She loved wearing her little pink swim wear, orange arm bands and white swimming cap.

In the afternoon David went sailing his yacht after lunch. The fresh wind cooled David down from the heat.
Susan and Emily were having a lovely time riding the donkeys on the beach. They were making the most of the last day, it was fun for Susan.

Day Four. Good morning. Susan wanted to stay the full six weeks holiday but David had to go back to work the next day. In fact the whole family would have liked to have stopped a bit longer.

On the way home Susan asked the same questions about the train as she did going. The family were not looking forward to going back to Wolverhampton. Late 20th century onwards.


Negative to positive.

David Sars Bride was a Wolverhampton man with a learning disability. A lot of things were playing on David's . It just seemed as if society was not accepting David's disability, this made David very angry. He kept on blaming himself for been how he was and been born in the first place.

David just wanted an equal life like everyone else but he could not seem to get the same rights as everyone else. The main thing he wanted in his life was a job. Don't get me wrong he had little jobs but employers put him on the same job all day long. It made him feel bored, fed up and angry.

David got very well with his brother John so well that it made him very angry that he could not go to the same school as John. David had to go to Penn fields special school. The school did not support david with his school at all because that was not possible when David was a child.
John became a very successful business man in art and design even though he did not have time for relationships, children or his parents. When he did have time he support his parents with David.

John and David had not had a holiday since childhood with their parents, which was the in1950s and 1960s.

It was Friday 13th October 2000, when David went to Wolverhampton college Bilston from the Job centre. The Job centre gave David a lot of stress over getting work and not getting work. This good David in a very bad mood. He started off very calm as he enrolled on his Sociology course. He walked into the canteen. He stood in the quene for a bacon and egg sandwich and a cup of coffee. The quene was very long and he could not wait for the staff to cook the bacon and egg. When David had bought his food and drink, a student named paul who was a lot younger than David looked at him very strangely. David did not like the look of paul because his hair was dark black, thick and brushy. All Paul said was.

" Alright mate,"

" What's your problem, mate?" asked David as he throw his hot coffee all over Paul.

Suddenly David took one bit out of his bacon and egg sandwich, it tasted off and smelled bad so he throw it all at Paul.

" Godness sake, what's up with you!" said Paul

The egg run down Paul's face.

" You looked at me strangely because of my disability."

No one did a thing about the row.

The truth of the matter was it was not as bad as what David thought. Paul did not think what David thought at. David just did not feel understood by non - disabled people. The Job centre did not help David either but then David should have tried to have been more calm in himself.

David moved on to the library to get some books for his course. He should have been looking for Socology books but he was looking at the psychologhy books instead, he was standing at the wrong stands. For a long time David walked round the library in an aggressive mood following this young female student Mandy about. She wore a short mini skirt, a pink low neck with her bra poking out, brown leather boots and long dune blond hair. David was just about to lose his temper with her until suddenly she told him some good news out the blue.

" My name is Mandy I work for Mencap in Wolverhampton, they are looking for a Learning Disability speaker, would you be interested?"

" Oh yes, I will fly for the chance, I am sick of doing the same job all day long."

" Well it be like that anymore, you will be doing different things."

The day Mandy took David for an interview as he canceled he Sociology course. David just was not thinking straight at that time. Written 2003 onwards.


Taking it out on others, very quick changes.


Sam and Bob Johnson were twin brother, they both had disabilities and they lived in Dudley. Bod was in car crash in 1980. They were very successful business men working in night clubs in the 60s and 70s. They dressed very smart suits and the women loved them. They were both students at Dudley college study Business management.They went on boys nights out together. They led equal lives despite of their disabilities

Sam's behavior changed him very quickly after he lost his brother Bod died in a car crash in 1980. Sam and Donna were going to get married but after Bob died but she could not cope with Sam's behavior. Sam hit the drink very badly. Sam went from been a lovely young man to a nasty old man. Sam's Mum Jean was too old take Sam's bad behavior. Jean was very scared of Sam mainly when he had been drinking too much. Sam was very bad tempered and dangerous. Jean was near enough having a nervous break down. Jean was mot strong cope with her son's behavior because of age and having to cope with her other son's death. Sam was making her worse with the way he was coping with things. Jean ended up not wanting anything to do with Sam anymore because of the sake of her age and health. He gave her no choice but kick her son out her life.

" You will have to go Sam, you are making me ill."

The way Sam spoke to Jean was not nice.

Sam moved to Wolverhampton known as a dangerous tramp, he was a very well known unlikeable man. Sam lost his business and everything. He slept and walked the streets of Wolverhampton. People who faced him were scared of him. As the years flew, he could not be bothered looking after himself. He never kept himself clean or change his clothes. He smelled like a tramp. He sat on park benches eating fishing, chips and having loads to drink and smoke.
He smoked like an old hag.

As the years rolled on the pain and anger over the loss of Bob got worse, it ate Sam up inside himself more and more. He was liked very few people.
He just could not move on, he found it very hard to. When people advised him to move on, he used to go mad, he would say.

" He was my brother, leave me alone!"

People walked away so he did not have any friends because he was not very nice to them. Sam never tried hard enough to help himself.

One day Sam was walking through Wolverhampton town centre. His mood got even worse than ever but that did not surprise people. He rushed around here, there and everywhere. He knocked into people without a care in the world. Pushing people down and meaning it as well.

Sam walked into the Counseling services to get help to see if he could get advice to cut down on his drinking. His behavior was so bad that staff did not want to help him. He could not and would not help himself, he was also very bad tempered.
Sam hung around outside until counseling place closed. It was Friday 31st October 2003. A young dun blond seventeen year old Y.T.S girl named Susan walked out. She wore blue jeans, black boots and a white tee shirt. Sam ran very quick round the back of the building. When he heard the key lock the door, he ran back round again. Strangely Sam wanted some money for some Crack cocaine. He put his hand round Susan's neck. He spoke in her ear.

" Keep quiet or I will slit your throat open." As he held a knife across Susan's neck.

" Have you got any money?"

Susan opened her purse, she only had £2.00, which was not enough for him. Sam cut her throat , as he flipped his blood shout eyes and grinned his teeth. Sam strangled Susan to death. Written 2003 onwards.


Working teenage boys. Mum trusted her boys Alan and Robert to take care of household while she was working until 10.00pm. When she got home she was hoping to find the boys in bed ready for school the next morning.

Robert was very fed up because he could not go out with his friends. The society in London started to get worse in the 1990s, Mum did not want her boys mixing with the wrong children. Parents were breaking down with a lot of upset and anger.

Alan asked Robert to change into his normal clothes after school.

" Oh Robert don't give me a hard time, you sound just like Mum."

"Don't you give me a hard time, I am on my own, your not fare and I am trying my best to do things right."

" I should feel free with you, I'd understand if you were Mum Alan."

" Don't push your cheek with me, Robert!"

" Do as I tell you in the first place, Robert then you can help me cook the tea."

" I have got home work to do."

" So have I Robert but the house needs to be taken care of as well."

Robert huffed and puffed.

" As Mum is not here I have to make sure that we are both doing our bit, Robert."

" I have had enough of this, Alan."

" Get up stairs and change your clothes, Robert!"

Robert could see that Alan was ready to lose his temper, so he changed his clothes and watched the television. Alan wanted Robert to cook the tea and wash up.

" Get up lazy bones, work has not stared yet."

Robert ribbed up his home work note pads, paper, text books and the lot.

" Right Robert, I am ringing Mum."

Alan rang his Mum, Mum spoke to Robert.

" Your so unfair, now I have to pay for all those books for the school."

" Now you can start off by doing paper rounds, you hate hard work don't you Robert!"

" I am not worried about that Mum, Mr Davis is going to kill me for not doing my work."

" You only have yourself to blame Robert, I think Mr Davis will be more cross about the damage books than the home work."

" Now help Alan out Robert otherwise I'll think of other ways to make life hard for you."

Alan managed to get Robert to tidy the mess up but it took a lot of hard work for him to get him to do it. Robert knew he would not get any food or pop if he did not help with the house work.

Robert knew he only had himself to blame for the damage of the home work.


" Good bye Robert, you have finely done some work, why is hard work to get you to do some work?"

Robert went quiet.

The boys eat their fish, chips bread and butter drank their glass of lemonade as they passed the the sauces and things . Suddenly Robert started flicking peas under the table which made Alan angry yet again.

" What are you doing Alan?" asked Robert as he was laughing.

" I am trying get away from your bad table manners Robert, this no laughing matter."

Robert started picking his spots. Robert had ginger hair, freckles and he was over weight. He blow his norse on his green school jumper as Robert kept on telling him to change school clothes to home clothes. Mum was unhappy with Alan because he should have been cooking a meat and veg dinner but Robert wanted fish and chips.

Suddenly Alan heard a smash, it made him very angry.

" What can I do to get a bit of peace"?

Robert smashed all the crocks so he did not have to wash up. Alan read Robert like a book.
Alan ended up sweeping all the mess up, this made Alan more and more angry. In the end he did not feel like doing his own home work but he had to do it. Alan loved his education but Robert did not. Alan was so tired he had to force himself to do his home work. He was not going to get himself a mess like Robert.

" Can I have some Apple pie and custard?"

" I don't see why you should Robert, after what you have put me through tonight. "

" We have no dishes, no plates, no cups, nothing and Mum is going to kill us both."

" You have to do without Robert, you should not have smashed everything up."

Robert just went around banging doors and giving Alan dirty looks, Alan just took no notice.

Alan did his home work and left Robert to it.

When nothing could get more worse than suddenly Alan could smell something burning in the house.Alan was close to a break down. Robert tried cooking in the saucepan, it was black and Robert stuck it in the dog's bowl.

" Taste that Alan, it's lovely."

" No thanks, Robert!" shout Alan in a very angry voice.

" I would not taste your cooking even if you paid me, Robert."

" Get away from me Robert!"

Alan did not know what to do next. Robert banged the door and stormed out his bedroom. Robert was in a bad mood all night long because he could not see his low life friends. It was a very time for boys of 13 and 15, even more stressful for Alan having to control his brother.

At last it was peace and quiet for Alan. Robert spent the rest of the evening in his bedroom. Alan looked in the mirror, he could see the bags under his big brown eyes. Alan stopped longer to tell his Mum about Robert otherwise he would have been in bed. Mum was well pleased with Robert, he was grounded for a week. The week after he was grounded he did paper rounds to save up money for the damage of the school books and breaking Mum's crocks. 2003 onwards.


Making sense of it all.

Mala Kaur was born in Bombay India in 1949. She never spoke of her childhood, it was too painful for her.

At the age of sixteen she moved to England in 1967. Friends from Bombay paid for her to get to London, then she was on her own. She had knocked on many doors asking for money. People turned her down because they did not know her. She slept on the street begging for money until people got to know her and had trust in her. She was always talking to herself because no one would talk to her. She was very unsure what to do with her life. She felt guilty for begging but she no choice.

" I never thought life would be like this." she said to herself,"

A few weeks came down the line, Mala finely made a friend. His name was David who lived with his parents. David would give Mala so much money a week. Mala stopped begging for money, she made more friends. David felt very sorry for Mala, their friendship grew and grew into love but that love did not last forever. Mala had got a job in paper job and started paying her but that job not last, the staff could understand her. The employer put her on a college course to learn English but she left because there were a good many students she did not get on with. As soon as she lost everything she lost David as well. David robbed her for every penny and kicked her out the house, she also turned to drugs, then in jail.

One day Mala walked into the Victoria pub, people give her strange looks and stared talking about her.

" That young girl has been there a while Fred but no one has spoke to her,"

" I know John, it's hard to understand her because she does not speak English,"

" I have seen her sitting on streets Fred talking to herself and begging for money, "

" Asking for money is the only I have heard her speak, Fred,"

" Strange, John,"

" Did she say her name at all, Fred?"

" No not what I am aware, John," Wednesday 7th November 2007.


The wondering boy who lived in a field.


He was put in a field called Kingswood common how he was there was unknown. He was born in round the 1800s. He was in a world of his own. He did not have a name. He wore rags and his history was unknown before Kingswood common. He lived in stewberry field. When he was found everyone was amazed he lived all those winters all those years with such heavy snow.

It was one winter's morning when Mr Robs notice him the first time pottering around in the field. It was a cold winter's morning when Mr Robs asked.

" When the summer comes, would you like to work for me as a stewberry picker but for now you can dig up the snow."

" Oh yes please." said the strange boy when he was the age of five.

A little Mr Robs knew that the boy had a learning disability, no one else knew. No one knew him anyway, he was seen but not heard. My Robs notice that the boy and himself were not understanding one another very well. Mr Robs knew there was a problem but he did not know what.

Mr Robs took the boy to the Coal mines, which was just down the road from the pony and trap.

" What's your name boy?"

The boy looked very confused as if he did not understand plus he could not speak very well either. The boy stood looking into space instead of looking at Mr Robs while he was talking. Mr Robs suddenly took out his whip and belt to him because the boy was not answering him. Mr Robs got more and more cross because he had never come across people misunderstanding before. Mr Robs did not see it like that he thought the boy was been rude.

" Do you have a tonge in your head, boy?"

Well it turned out no one had even tried to teach the boy anything, he all left on his own. He was trying to talk but he was finding it very hard.

" Pick up the coal!" shouted Mr Robs

The boy jumped out of his skin. He ran away as Mr Robs chased him with the cain. The boy was very scared, confused and he was not use to any human being. He had never had a memory of anyone been nasty or nice to him but after that he had flash backs and nightmares. In the end females ended up feeling sorry for him. He did not know how to answer people. He was very scared of males after what Mr Robs did to him, he was scared of the big wide world.

Although the boy could not speak, Mr Robs could tell how he was feeling even though he did not understand what was wrong. He looked at Mr Robs as if he was telling him to go away, with the look he was giving him.

Mrs Price was a Green grocster, she was very cross with Mr Robs.

" What do you think you are doing?"

" Mind your own business, woman."

" I asked him question he would not answer me."

" May be he's scared of you, Mr Robs."

Very slowly the boy started to come out of himself. Mrs Price learned that he could not speak so she taught him to speak. It took he about five years to speak, she even gave him a name. She named him Albert.

Mrs Price's husband Mr Price was a very hard man but not as hard as Mr Robs. Albert had temper paddies and wet himself, when that happened Mr Price cained him as Mrs Price broke down in tears. Little did people knew that Albert had Mental health problems. Things were really bad, Albert was still misunderstood.

One day Albert escaped from Mr Robs, he was just about caught him by getting run over by a pony and trap. At that point for some strange reason Mr Price was very drunk, he hit Mr Rob in the face. Albert had a fit through the shock of almost been run over, Mr Robs put a spoon in Albert's mouth in thinking Albert was been naughty. The got himself off the road when he came round, no one knew he was having a fit. He tried walking to the common where he know, he walked slowly as he was weak on his legs.

" You should not take children to the pub, you have got the boy drunk."

" What a horrible thing to say, Mr Robs I would not do that."

" What is the point saving this child, he does not speak, move or do anything, Mr Robs."

" Don't let your wife hear you say that, Mr Price!"

" There's nothing wrong with the child he's just naughty but he still has the rights to live."

Mr Price was so drunk he could not hardy speak himself.


Mr Price took Albert by the hand despite of been drunk. Mr Robs thought Mr Price took Albert to the pub as Albert was weak on his legs. When Mr Price bought Albert to his House, Mrs Price gave him a lolly pop from the Old Sweet shop and wiped the tears out his eyes. Mrs Price was like a Mother to Albert.


" Would you like some clothes , Albert?" asked Mrs Price but Albert did not seen to understand, Mrs Price did not get cross with him because she knew that was the way Albert was.

Mrs Price took Albert out to buy some clothes. From a boy in rags he turned out to wearing verlet suits. In time Albert started to smile, he showed his bright blond hair which had been washed in soap and those bright blue eyes that bought the girls alive. Mrs Price even gave Albert a bath, he felt such a different boy.

Mrs Price went off to see Mr Robs at the coalmines to show off her clean and smart dressed boy.

" I am not having him in the coal mines dressed like that, Mrs Price!."

" Don't you worry Mr Robs, this clean boy is going to no coal mines!"

" This boy can work for you Mrs Price now."

" Well jobs are cleaner than your Mr Robs."

Suddenly Albert pushed Mr Robs down the mines, he suddenly came out with.

" I will never get dirty again, well not over your dead body."

" Too right, Albert you won't get dirty again." said Mrs Price

" Mr Robs is so thick that he is coal." said Albert

Mr Robed choked himself to death on the coal.

Years and years went on after Mrs Price died, Albert still had to go through a lot of misunderstanding with people. Everyone thought he was rude and naughty. It got so bad that Albert ended up in jail not understanding why he was there. Albert wondered in and out of jail. It turned out that he had a lot of mental illnesses, until he took his own life and he could not take anymore. If Albert would have been born a century later, things may have been better for him.

Mr Price was a sound man when he did not drink too much, he did get on with Albert sometimes even better than Mr Robs did sometimes. He could be hard on Albert sometimes but nice to him two. When Mr Price died it upset Albert very badly, he remembered the good times that he found hard to talk about. Albert even had a speech problem when Mrs Price taught him to speak. Written 2007 onwards.

Hidden Murder.

John Brown lived in a black and white house on the Yorkshire moors. The house was very much out in the sticks for a young man in the 1960s. His house was on a very land.

John was doing his ironing on hot summer's day of Friday 30th June 1963, he was 21 years old. His five year old daughter Julie was breaking from school. He was in his back kichen John was happy he was in love with his girlfriend Susan he sang along to his Beatles LP. Even though he was on his on at the time, the patio doors were open and the birds were singing. Suddenly someone came behind John while he was ironing, he was not excepting a shock like that. The person grabbed him by the neck of his white tee shirt, a knife when through the spine of his back as he skit on a banana skin, he came down with the ironing board and the wire of the iron caught spikes.


It was 4.00pm when the child miner Donna dropped his five year old daughter home from school. Donna saw a man in a black mask, leather jacket and gloves as she was driving, he was walking along the country lanes. Donna took no notice. Donna knocked and knocked door. It seemed very strange that there was no answer. It was very strange because normally John opened the door right away. Lucky the patio doors open. Poor five year old Julie walked into the kichen to find dried blood out of her young Father's head, a knife through his back and a banana skin stuck to his shoe. Julie yelled a shock of her dead Father, donna found it hard to believe what happened. Blood was all over the ironing board cover and all over the clothes on the ironing borad.

" Daddy!" Julie screamed

Donna and Julie were both as white as ghosts. Julie was shaken as Donna calmed her down.

The murderer took off his mask he was a blond haired man with dark brown eyes. Written 13.2.2003


Family drama.

Maria was a little girl who raised her seven brothers and sisters in the first world war while her was working to make ends meet. She grow up to marry an evil man named George German but the marriage ended after 20 yrs. After the married ended Maria's daughter Mandy had a disabled daughter named Alice. Mandy had to go out to work to pay the bills look after her daughter. Maria looked after Alice while Mandy was at work.

A few years before Alice was born, Maria send Mandy to the pub to ask for money for food. George looked very old even when he was very young. He was a bit of an army great coat hung round his shoulders, revealing a blue suit that had seen better days.

His food was all down his tie, outline his lunch meni he smelled of fish, chips and pub. He sat in the pub wearing steel caped boots that he wore for work. He wore a mental cup with a string round his neck because he begged people for his beer money even though he was working. He should be using his working money on his and children. He was a very greedy man.

When he did not go home to his wife, he's sleep rough with all kinds of strange rough drunk women, which was unknown to Maria. May be he was a tramp who slept with female tramps.

He steady leaned across the pub table as his oldest daughter Mandy who was 13 entered the pub. His trousers were too long as they dragged on the floor and in the mud.

" Dad, have you got any money for Mum for food?"

" Go home your just a child, go to bed and you must not be in this pub young lady."

" I will put a check in the post."

Mandy was shaking like a leaf when she he Father so angry and drunk.

" You after my money again, aren't you?"

He took off his belt off his trousers to his daughter, scared the life out of the poor child.
Mandy was too scared to speak.

" Go home!"

" I'll whip you will my belt, I don't give a dam who is there."

" You are having no money off me, this is my beer money."

In August 1984, Mandy got married at Saint Peter's church Wolverhampton before she took her guests to the Victoria hotel. On that morning George went into The George pub as soon as it opened. There were mates in there he had not seen for 20yrs.
As soon as George turned up at the church half way through the service, the family knew he was drunk, he could not hardy walk in a straight line. His behavior in the church seemed very calm. The whole family were stilling hoping he would not turn up at the hotel, they were dreading it. Sadly for the family he turned up. Well Mandy did not mind him been there.

The family entered the Victoria hotel.

George did not like Germ's husband Tom. George started shouting at Maria for letting Mandy marry Tom.


" Mandy should not be marrying that man, he has a bloody other woman."

" It's Mandy's life, your always like this when you have too much to drink, don't swear at me George, you know I don't like it!"

" How can you let this bloody happen, Maria?"

" Mandy is 31 yrs old, she an adult she will do what she wants whether like it or not George, please stop swearing."

Maria thrown Mandy's wedding cake right in George face as strangely he was falling anyway through been drunk.

" I swear if I bloody want to swear."

George nose started to bleed as the sliver when up his nose.

" Mum, look what you have done, I have worked hard baking that cake and plus you have knocked Dad out."

" Good Mandy, he gave me plenty of beatings when I married to him, now it's my turn."

Germ laughed when Maria throw the cake but Mandy did not find funny after she spend hours baking it .

Mandy her sister Germ.

Follow on from the cake.

" Germ can you drive Dad to the hospital?"

Germ huffed and puffed at the idea of taking her drunk and ill Father to hospital.

" Yes, I really will to do that Mandy."

It turned out as bad as Germ thought, George behaved very badly as he started rowing with his youngest daughter in the car. He just got worse as even the nurses were scared of him. On a very hot day, he a very long blue thick coat, he must have been boiling but he was too dangerous for anyone to take his coat off.

Maria's best friend Sue was a nurse.

When George came round.

" Why did you leave my coat on Sue?"

" You were too drunk George."

George laughed.

" Not funny George, are you still married to Maria?"

" No way, I can't spend my money on what I want to when I am with her."

" You mean drink don't you George?"

George laughed yet.

" Not funny, George."


Mandy and Maria entered as Germ came back from having a coffee.


" What are you two doing here?"

" I feel guilty about throwing the cake at your Dad."

" Don't be silly Mum, I don't." said Germ

" Mum, that was just class when I saw you thrown that cake." said Germ

" I don't think it's funny, she could have killed Dad." said Mandy

" Good." said Mandy as she laugh

" You mean you are, Mandy."

" So were you when you cut my eye lashes when I was little."

" Go on you two go and have a coffee and calm down."

Maria went out for a smoke as the girls had a coffee.

The girls entered the ward to find their Mum kneeling at their Father's hospital bed kissing. They both look shocked after all these years.


" Mum, fancy another coffee, let's have a private word?"

" Ok, Germ."

As they entered the cafe Germ said.

" Mum, are you mad, are you both back together?"

" I would not be kissing him otherwise."

" Why, Mum?"

" I felt guilty about the cake, we thought we'd give it another go."

" That's no reason to get back together."

" I have something to tell both you and Mandy."

" Ok, we will talk about it when go back to the ward then!"

There was a very long pause on the way back from the cafe to the ward between Maria and Germ.

When Germ and Maria entered the ward, Maria asked the girls.

" How do you feel about me and your Father getting back together?"

" I don't know, Mum." said Mandy

" Well I have breast cancer and I feel bad about throwing the cake at your Father."


The girls had both asked their Mother how long she had Breast cancer but she had only found out a couple of days ago. Germ was rather angry because she was worried that her Mum going back with her Dad with the way he would give her more still with her Breast cancer. Mandy thought this point in time it was better than her been a lone. This caused Mandy and Germ to full out because they did not have the same views about their parents getting back together. May be Maria having thrown that cake at George gave her chance for the first time to get her anger out on him on what he did years before but then she felt as if she had done a crime.


" All the hard work I went through baking it." said Mandy

" That no reason to get back together. " said Germ

" Blood is thicker than water as long as they love one another." Germ

There were a lot of things going through Germ's mind but did George, make up your own . 12.12.09

Profound and multiple learning disabilities.

This study is apart of your package for Learning Disability week Health June 21st - 22nd 2010.

I am raising Learning Disability and Health Awareness.

This is about Profound and Multiple Learning Disabilities, why do we need to talk about these people? We need to talk about these people because they need to be notice as much as what everyone else does.

People with Profound and Multiple Learning Disabilities are individuals just like everyone else.

They often have more needs than everyone else so they need more help to get along in life.

If you find out what those needs are you can do more to help these people.
People do not listen to them because they all have different ways of communicating with people. Every Learning Disability is different, people just need to learn how to understand them.

People with Profound and Multiple Learning Disabilities have more than one disabilities, in most people every disability is different. Well you need except anything from anybody and everybody.

People with Profound disabilities need lots of support because they may have other disabilities as well.

People with Physical disabilities do have problems with their bodies or different parts.

People who use wheelchairs have Physical disabilities, that can can either mean Profound or Multiple Learning Disabilities.

Sensory disabilities is when people find hard to see and hear.These people have lots of Health problems,Mental Health problems and even Autism.

People with Profound and Multiple Learning Disabilities need a lot of help. They also find it very hard to communicate.


People with Profound and Multiple disabilities communicate in lots of different ways. Not every person communicate the same, they do what is easy for them.

USING THEIR FACE. People might show how they feel by changing from happy to sad for eg;

MAKING A NOISE. Making a noise could be their way expressing themselves and to make themselves notice.

USING THEIR BODY. People may show you how they feel by the way they use their bodies. For eg; they may learn towards you if they want something.

CHANGING BEHAVIOR. People may show you how they feel with the way they behave. For eg; push over a table if they are anger.If they don't feel listened to they may become anger, if they don't think you understand what they are trying to say or what they want.


USING SPEECH, SYMBOLS OR SIGNS.


Most People with Profound and Multiple Learning Disabilities find it hard to understand what others say.

It is important to spend time getting to know each person and learn about the way they communicate.

It's also important to learn they the way these people understand things so you can help them.

One way is to show someone an object to remind them of something they do often.

For eg; if the person likes art you could show them a paint brush or a picture to give them a choice to do art if they want to.


Some people might need special aids to help their bodied stay straight. Aids is something that help people do things more easily.

If someone has Physical disabilities they could have Physiotherapy.

Physiotherapy is where someone called Physiotherapist helps them move their bodies more easily.

There are lots of other people who are paid to support people use their bodies. For eg; Occupational therapist helps people learn skills with the right aids.

Carers of people with Profound and Multiple Learning Disabilities must be trained so they can help take care of these people in the right way.


People with Profound and Multiple Learning Disabilities often need lots of support with their health.

Many people have Epilepsy.

Some people need lots of help when they swallow their food.

This is important as everyone needs food to stay Healthy.

Some people might get food through a tube.

Some people may need a carer to use aids to take liquid out of their throat so they don't choke.

Someone with these disabilities find it hard to tell you if they are in pain. They may need to support to know they are in pain and to make them feel better.

Some people may behave in a way that most people find hard.

This might be because they are not getting enough help to live their lives.

It's important to understand why a person behaves like they do. For eg; I used to pull temper paddies as a child because I found doing things for myself was hard for me but I wanted do them myself without help just like other people. Late in my life, I found even people without disabilities needs help at times.

They may behave in a certain way because that maight their way of telling you that they are not feeling well.

They may not like the place that they are in.

People with Mental Health needs need the right help.

Most people need help personal care, for eg; washing, bathing, feeding and going to the toilet.

People should have help to tell other people what they want and need.


People with these disabilities will carry on learning things all their lives, just like everyone else.

They will learn slowly though, a bit at a time.

It helps these people to learn when someone shows them lots a times.

Some of the things these people learn are things that people learn when they are young. For eg; how to press a button to make something happen.

Other people with these disabilities are not treated in the same way as other people.

Other people do not understand that they have the same rights as everyone else.

Other people need to understand that people with these disabilities can make their own choices and do things they enjoy like everyone else but with the right help.