Here's some of my early work.
I had splendid love he was the best gentleman I had ever had.
I thought he was the best I ever had, how wrong was I.
I thought he gave me what I wanted in life, he was my lover.
I don't think we will ever love one another again.
May be I will be with him in heaven.
Now I am without him my life is like hell.
If only he still loved me or if only I did not love him anymore.
If only he would have stayed with me he would have been still with me now.
If only he still wanted me.
The year is 1997, Monday 16th May 1994 we met, would have been three years today if we would have still together.
Whatever went wrong bet ween us for it to come to this?
Why did he leave me in the dark alone? Written May 16th 1997
Love poems.
I love you more than just a true friend.
Please would you be my true boyfriend or is that too much ask?
I have had so many men who have ended it with me so blue, I really want a love that's forever true.
It seems to me that you are true, I have a lot of trust in you.
Please don't rush things, I would really truly hate to lose you.
I love and miss you just as much.
May be one time I will become your bride but not for a long time yet, we have loads of time.
Please don't worry I would not dream of ending it with you because I easy get upset too.
I mean what I say is true, it's the whole truth nothing but the truth.
I hope you believe me too. Written 1997
Love and life.
Love can hurt you enough like a knife that goes through your veins.
When love ends it brings so much pain, strain and shame.
When love begins it can bring the sweetest of things.
With any luck your love will be mine right up to the end of time.
Sometimes love can be so mean when you are so keen, it sends up blind right until the end of your time. Written Late 20th century to early 21st century.
Having friends.
Everyone should have friends everywhere.
Everyone's friend should be with them there.
Friends should be there to care and do things together for one another.
Keep hold of your friends but love comes and goes.
When I was a girl my school days were the worse days of my life.
I don't know why adults used to tell me that school days are the best years of your life.
The day I left school I felt peace.
School used to really get to me because in every school I went to there were bullies everywhere.
Bullies were my worse nightmare.
Bullies were the death of me.
I learned more out of school than in.
I was born in Wolverhampton but sadly there's no sand and sea.
There's no summer year round to to be.
To me Wolverhampton is just where I live.
Roads, traffic, paths, houses, shops, pubs, night clubs and hospitals.
The traffic is a big danger to any animal and human being.
Wolverhampton is very dull and boring place to be.
Wolverhampton was bad enough when I wrote this poem but now due to smoking ban and credit crunch it's got even worse with very few people going in the pubs.
Peace and quiet is a lovely sound for me because there's no noise to hear.
No war of guns and bombs outside our doors.
No fireworks going off through the midnight wind.
We have seen and heard everything that there is to hear.
Children go out to have fun without parents worrying whether there children are still living on this earth.
Adults should be able to know their children are safe, not anymore those days are gone.
This poem explains that it is not a peaceful world now it's got even worse with anti - social behavior.
Father Ray.
When I was a baby and small child, Father Ray use to take carry me, here there and everywhere.
He use to held my hand everywhere in Fathering care.
Father, Ray use to kiss and cuddle me with tender loving to be.
Father, Ray was always there to make sure I ate all my tea.
When I was fifteen years old he drove round the night clubs in Margate looking for me.
Father, Ray is such a gentleman and Dad to me better than my real Father has been.
In emergency Father, Ray is always there to care and to share.
Father, Ray is a loving Dad as much as he can be.
When it was my birthday Father, Ray was still here with me.
When my Mother told me that my Father was not Ray, I was confused not knowing what was happening to me.
I was mad, angry and I cried.
I was frightened to go to sleep that night in case I had nightmares.
When I was ill Father, Ray took care of me.
Confused parents make confused children, it does not help their relationships either still that's life. In my case I have just left a confused man over mouth ago after 15yrs. I am not confused now at least I hope not anyway.
LOVE.
One always wonders why we are all ever born.
Our parents fall in love and bring us to the world.
Most parents break and then that cause anger, hurt and pain to us all.
We fall in love and the pain of ended love hurts even more.
Love is like a story, love is like a book, please turn over a lot more than a thousand pages your welcome to have a look.
I have got to the stage of thinking either forever love or no love at all the pain is too much to cope with.
I hope I am wrong in thinking I could be so weak, I hope I become strong.
Will I ever met my forever love?
I have fallen in and out of love so many times every love I have had has a Farly tale dream story and nightmare in them.
Our dreams will more than likely come true but life is one big dream for you and me.
The character
What do you see god when you look at me?
Why did you make me?
Would you agree there's a character in me?
Why did you bring this disabled world to me?
Thank you god for making me.
Am I the human being you wanted me to be?
What are you seeing and thinking when you look down from heaven to earth at me?
You see a human being who is not very wise.
How can you see me god with those far away eyes?
As a human being I am sitting here still.
I'm human baby, child and teenager inside an adult who used to dribble her food and make no reply.
You look down from heaven to earth in a loud voice saying I wish she'd try.
Did you ever you used to notice the things I used to do like loosing a sock and shoe?
Did you notice the things my family used to do like feeding and bathing me all the days through?
Do you still see the baby in me?
If you open your eyes god I'm a disabled person who has or should the rights to live my life the same as other people and that's the same for other disabled people too.
I will tell you as the human being sitting here all through my childhood I could not see a brother and sister with me.
It was the beginning of my teenage years when my baby sister came to me.
No sign of my Father until I was twenty - one all my family were there for me from birth.
When I was a young girl of sixteen I used to dream of wings underneath my feet dreaming of the man I'd marry, how wrong was I to think such a thing. I was just too blind to see but what will will be. Never say never there's still time for me but I have also learned not to build my hopes up you see .
Why did you make me?
Would you agree there's a character in me?
Why did you bring this disabled world to me?
Thank you god for making me.
Am I the human being you wanted me to be?
What are you seeing and thinking when you look down from heaven to earth at me?
You see a human being who is not very wise.
How can you see me god with those far away eyes?
As a human being I am sitting here still.
I'm human baby, child and teenager inside an adult who used to dribble her food and make no reply.
You look down from heaven to earth in a loud voice saying I wish she'd try.
Did you ever you used to notice the things I used to do like loosing a sock and shoe?
Did you notice the things my family used to do like feeding and bathing me all the days through?
Do you still see the baby in me?
If you open your eyes god I'm a disabled person who has or should the rights to live my life the same as other people and that's the same for other disabled people too.
I will tell you as the human being sitting here all through my childhood I could not see a brother and sister with me.
It was the beginning of my teenage years when my baby sister came to me.
No sign of my Father until I was twenty - one all my family were there for me from birth.
When I was a young girl of sixteen I used to dream of wings underneath my feet dreaming of the man I'd marry, how wrong was I to think such a thing. I was just too blind to see but what will will be. Never say never there's still time for me but I have also learned not to build my hopes up you see .
When I was twenty - eight I thought my life was over I thought it was too late, even though I was in love with a man who wasn't right for me.
I may go through pain in my life like everyone else but I pick myself up and move on.
I believe there's always someone for someone.
Only you god can tell me what my future is to be.
When I was a young woman of thirty I thought I'd live a normal life to be.
I though by the age of thirty I'd be rearing young of my own but now I have seen the world today it's not a safe world for children to be.
Being disabled is stopping rearing children like everyone else I just needed the support that was all.
Not everyone is lucky to have their dream home and lover to be which has taught me not to live in Farly tale land to be.
I must say it would be nice to be with a gentleman who will bond with me to love forever endlessly.
Now I am nearly forty the years are rolling fast.
I have walked out on one man who was not meant to last with me but now I have learned to see what happens when tomorrow's door opens.
Who knows where I will be when I am fifty, will there be the man for me?
My dark future will be upon me so I will now try to live my life without regret.
Loneliness and old age will give me so much to dread.
While I'm still young enough I will enjoy the life I have yet.
Old age will not make a fool out of me, if that was so what a sad character I would be.
I don't expect people to feel sorry for me, old or young I must enjoy life while I am here.
I want my peaceful body crumbled away with happiness and grace but no pain.
Now and again I will look down from heaven to earth to see the people I leave behind who I remember well.
You must accept the fact that we can't live forever.
So open your eyes god open and see, under that disabled person is an able human being and she is a real character in me.
I will still write short stories, novel, play and romantic poetry. 1996 - 97
I may go through pain in my life like everyone else but I pick myself up and move on.
I believe there's always someone for someone.
Only you god can tell me what my future is to be.
When I was a young woman of thirty I thought I'd live a normal life to be.
I though by the age of thirty I'd be rearing young of my own but now I have seen the world today it's not a safe world for children to be.
Being disabled is stopping rearing children like everyone else I just needed the support that was all.
Not everyone is lucky to have their dream home and lover to be which has taught me not to live in Farly tale land to be.
I must say it would be nice to be with a gentleman who will bond with me to love forever endlessly.
Now I am nearly forty the years are rolling fast.
I have walked out on one man who was not meant to last with me but now I have learned to see what happens when tomorrow's door opens.
Who knows where I will be when I am fifty, will there be the man for me?
My dark future will be upon me so I will now try to live my life without regret.
Loneliness and old age will give me so much to dread.
While I'm still young enough I will enjoy the life I have yet.
Old age will not make a fool out of me, if that was so what a sad character I would be.
I don't expect people to feel sorry for me, old or young I must enjoy life while I am here.
I want my peaceful body crumbled away with happiness and grace but no pain.
Now and again I will look down from heaven to earth to see the people I leave behind who I remember well.
You must accept the fact that we can't live forever.
So open your eyes god open and see, under that disabled person is an able human being and she is a real character in me.
I will still write short stories, novel, play and romantic poetry. 1996 - 97
TO FANNY BRAWNE LOVE FROM JOHN KEATS.
My future is very dark without you, I can't see the light of life at all.
I don't have any happiness to look forward to without you at all.
I don't have love inside me for anyone but you.
Fanny you are the sweetest girl of all.
I want to hide away from life, I can't live any longer without you.
Without you my dear I can't think very clear.
People don't like the fact that my feelings are so strong towards you.
They told me that you'll hurt me, yes you did when I caught you making eyes at another man yet I still foolishly love you all the same.
People think I should get on with my life may be they are right.
My feelings are here for you that I can't help.
Can I face tomorrow without tears?
Fanny if you want me to stay alive please give me your love. 1996 - 1997
I don't have any happiness to look forward to without you at all.
I don't have love inside me for anyone but you.
Fanny you are the sweetest girl of all.
I want to hide away from life, I can't live any longer without you.
Without you my dear I can't think very clear.
People don't like the fact that my feelings are so strong towards you.
They told me that you'll hurt me, yes you did when I caught you making eyes at another man yet I still foolishly love you all the same.
People think I should get on with my life may be they are right.
My feelings are here for you that I can't help.
Can I face tomorrow without tears?
Fanny if you want me to stay alive please give me your love. 1996 - 1997
Why do I like poetry?
I like poems because I can write about how I feel about life.
Mostly I write about love and romantic.
I try to be a romantic person but then I get hurt.
One thing you will lean romantic poets are loving people but the people they love can easy hurt them.
Poetry gets us through life.
A lot young poets have died young through not be able to cope with relationship break ups for eg John Keats.
Like everyone we have gone through a lot of good and bad which goes into our poetry.
Through childhood I dreamt of my Farly tale love.
I always dream of true love but I keep on learning by mistakes.
I now do my best protect myself from getting hurt again but I feel bed if I upset my partner and it never stops me from loving again someone who I love who loves me for me.
There's very few of us in this world who is lucky enough to meet the right person mainly today.
Even true love has it's ups and downs.
I hope we will do it right this time. Written 1996 - 1997.
If getting over the one I love is to be.
If getting over the one I love is to be, I must get over the pain I am in.
It's very hard to get love when feeling is not something one can control.
No matter what they put you through you feelings do control.
It's hard to get over love that means such a lot to you.
He still means a lot to me.
New heart please come to me under the sea.
I must put the past behind, there must be someone out there who loves me a lot better than he did.
I used to think I had trust in love but I am not sure I believe in true love anymore.
The love I lost now feels like death.
My happiness has passed away.
I am so frightened to fall deeply in love again, I do not think I can bare the deep pain.
I do not think I want the chance of a high romance. Written 1996 - 1997.
I like poems because I can write about how I feel about life.
Mostly I write about love and romantic.
I try to be a romantic person but then I get hurt.
One thing you will lean romantic poets are loving people but the people they love can easy hurt them.
Poetry gets us through life.
A lot young poets have died young through not be able to cope with relationship break ups for eg John Keats.
Like everyone we have gone through a lot of good and bad which goes into our poetry.
Through childhood I dreamt of my Farly tale love.
I always dream of true love but I keep on learning by mistakes.
I now do my best protect myself from getting hurt again but I feel bed if I upset my partner and it never stops me from loving again someone who I love who loves me for me.
There's very few of us in this world who is lucky enough to meet the right person mainly today.
Even true love has it's ups and downs.
I hope we will do it right this time. Written 1996 - 1997.
If getting over the one I love is to be.
If getting over the one I love is to be, I must get over the pain I am in.
It's very hard to get love when feeling is not something one can control.
No matter what they put you through you feelings do control.
It's hard to get over love that means such a lot to you.
He still means a lot to me.
New heart please come to me under the sea.
I must put the past behind, there must be someone out there who loves me a lot better than he did.
I used to think I had trust in love but I am not sure I believe in true love anymore.
The love I lost now feels like death.
My happiness has passed away.
I am so frightened to fall deeply in love again, I do not think I can bare the deep pain.
I do not think I want the chance of a high romance. Written 1996 - 1997.
Moving on and trying again.
This new lover of mine is very kind.
Now I have a new heart that belongs to mine.
Once upon a time Antonio was mine.
Lynn took Antonio's heart away from mine.
I did not think she was very kind at the time.
Looking back now she was very kind, I can get on with this lovely new life of mine.
My longest relationship has gone may be this relationship may be even longer.
I don't want him back anymore, a new love has come to my door.
I live my life everyday hoping that my new will come my way. Written September 1997.
He no more any love of mine.
He walked walked out my life after two and a half years, with another lover on his mind.
He will never find another love like mine, he was warned that he was making a big mistake.
It services him right, now it's too late for him to love me again.
Now I have a new lover he's very kind I hope he knows his own mind. Written September 1997.
0h please stay with me, please never leave me.
Oh please stay in love with me until the end of our time.
Other men have given me such a hard, it's muck up my mind.
Please promise me not to leave me alone other wise I will cry, I will take my own life.
Your always on my mind, I love you and miss you all the time.
After having goodness knows how many boyfriends ended it with me leaving me so sad and blue, I don't think I can't get through.
I love you more than just a true friend.
Please can I trust you as my true boyfriend?
I really want a love who will want me forever.
I only hope that you are the gentleman for me.
Please do not rush into our love, I'd hate to lose you so much.
It's seems to me that you are so true, that you won't leave me blue.
One day at a time I slowly hope to become your bride.
Please please please give me loads of plenty of time.
Please don't worry darling, I never dream of ending it will you. Written September 1997
This new lover of mine is very kind.
Now I have a new heart that belongs to mine.
Once upon a time Antonio was mine.
Lynn took Antonio's heart away from mine.
I did not think she was very kind at the time.
Looking back now she was very kind, I can get on with this lovely new life of mine.
My longest relationship has gone may be this relationship may be even longer.
I don't want him back anymore, a new love has come to my door.
I live my life everyday hoping that my new will come my way. Written September 1997.
He no more any love of mine.
He walked walked out my life after two and a half years, with another lover on his mind.
He will never find another love like mine, he was warned that he was making a big mistake.
It services him right, now it's too late for him to love me again.
Now I have a new lover he's very kind I hope he knows his own mind. Written September 1997.
0h please stay with me, please never leave me.
Oh please stay in love with me until the end of our time.
Other men have given me such a hard, it's muck up my mind.
Please promise me not to leave me alone other wise I will cry, I will take my own life.
Your always on my mind, I love you and miss you all the time.
After having goodness knows how many boyfriends ended it with me leaving me so sad and blue, I don't think I can't get through.
I love you more than just a true friend.
Please can I trust you as my true boyfriend?
I really want a love who will want me forever.
I only hope that you are the gentleman for me.
Please do not rush into our love, I'd hate to lose you so much.
It's seems to me that you are so true, that you won't leave me blue.
One day at a time I slowly hope to become your bride.
Please please please give me loads of plenty of time.
Please don't worry darling, I never dream of ending it will you. Written September 1997
When we were lovers.
What a kind sweet gentleman he used to be.
Whatever has happened to we?
He was full of love, happiness and joy to be.
He used to be a lovely gentleman and boy.
He still has lovely brown eyes.
People think he has lost his mind.
People think he's gone blind.
Now that I have lost him, I am very weary who I find.
What if they don't replace the love I lost?
Where's the man's voice that made me laugh?
Where's his handsome face that made me smile?
Where's the touch of his arms?
Where's the touch of his charm?
Where's the man who walked me home in the dark and the rain.
Where's the man I'd dreamt about in my sleep without a doubt.
Where's the man who beauty me every time he looked at me. written 1997
My lover has gone forever.
My lover has gone forever, my history fellow.
I feel lonely without Tony Romany.
Is everything going very slowly?
Sadly enough I won't be able to love Tony Romany ever again.
Isn't he a dear fellow, feeling under the weather. written 1997.
I love the sea.
I love the beach and the sea.
The beach and the sea is a romantic place to be.
I love the sun shining and rising over the deep blue sea with a lovely yellow sun set.
I think it's the place to be.
I love the yellow sand; it's lovely to lovely make sand castles with children by the sea. 1997 - 2000
Whatever has happened to we?
He was full of love, happiness and joy to be.
He used to be a lovely gentleman and boy.
He still has lovely brown eyes.
People think he has lost his mind.
People think he's gone blind.
Now that I have lost him, I am very weary who I find.
What if they don't replace the love I lost?
Where's the man's voice that made me laugh?
Where's his handsome face that made me smile?
Where's the touch of his arms?
Where's the touch of his charm?
Where's the man who walked me home in the dark and the rain.
Where's the man I'd dreamt about in my sleep without a doubt.
Where's the man who beauty me every time he looked at me. written 1997
My lover has gone forever.
My lover has gone forever, my history fellow.
I feel lonely without Tony Romany.
Is everything going very slowly?
Sadly enough I won't be able to love Tony Romany ever again.
Isn't he a dear fellow, feeling under the weather. written 1997.
I love the sea.
I love the beach and the sea.
The beach and the sea is a romantic place to be.
I love the sun shining and rising over the deep blue sea with a lovely yellow sun set.
I think it's the place to be.
I love the yellow sand; it's lovely to lovely make sand castles with children by the sea. 1997 - 2000
I try to be romantic.
I try to be romantic, that's the way I want to be.
If it's not right for women to be romantic I won't be, I will only show my feelings out in poetry.
My feelings towards someone who means a lot to me yet I don't mean a lot to him anymore, he loves another woman.
He hurt me very badly.
I can't help the way I am I was born to be soft and romantic yet I can't help who I fall for either.
He may well rip my heart into a thousand pieces yet I love him like there's no other man on this earth.
Now I find it hard to stop writing poetry as my feelings are uncontrolled.
Believe me that man was not as special as I made him out to be in this poem, I only thought he was. How blind was he not to understand how much I loved him but how blind was I to not understand that he did not really love me? Then we may have just loved one another as much as we could. We were both blind in our ways in our minds. written 1997.
If only I knew whether you are right or wrong for me.
From the day I first met you I thought you were the right person for me.
You left me sad, lonely and blue.
You know it's true that even now I still love you but you don't feel the same way anymore.
I don't understand why I still love someone who has not got the time a day for me.
Sometimes I feel like locking myself away in my bedroom and never coming out but other times I feel lonely.
Live in the bedroom with a kettle, food, toilet but I need to cut down on my heavy drinking.
Not seeing the world again to get away from pain is how I feel.
I don't feel very strong at all, there doe not see to be an end to all this but there must be an end to pain somewhere and somehow.
Surly I can't keep on feeling depressed like this, there's got to be light at the end of the tunnel somewhere.
All I do is write pages and pages of romantic poetry about you, it shows how mad and crazy I am about you which makes me mad and crazy when you don't feel the same about me.
How strange is that?
I feel ashamed to love someone who does not love me but my feelings have so much control over me.
There must be someone better out who loves me for me but I find it hard to believe that I will love him because foolishly my feelings are still with you.
I must love the wrong man, what is it about love it just blinds you?
Now you have gone, I must move on I must carry on without you.
It's hard to do because I miss you so true.
Everywhere I stand I see lovers kissing and hugging everyday.
They must think I have lost my way. Written 1997
I try to be romantic, that's the way I want to be.
If it's not right for women to be romantic I won't be, I will only show my feelings out in poetry.
My feelings towards someone who means a lot to me yet I don't mean a lot to him anymore, he loves another woman.
He hurt me very badly.
I can't help the way I am I was born to be soft and romantic yet I can't help who I fall for either.
He may well rip my heart into a thousand pieces yet I love him like there's no other man on this earth.
Now I find it hard to stop writing poetry as my feelings are uncontrolled.
Believe me that man was not as special as I made him out to be in this poem, I only thought he was. How blind was he not to understand how much I loved him but how blind was I to not understand that he did not really love me? Then we may have just loved one another as much as we could. We were both blind in our ways in our minds. written 1997.
If only I knew whether you are right or wrong for me.
From the day I first met you I thought you were the right person for me.
You left me sad, lonely and blue.
You know it's true that even now I still love you but you don't feel the same way anymore.
I don't understand why I still love someone who has not got the time a day for me.
Sometimes I feel like locking myself away in my bedroom and never coming out but other times I feel lonely.
Live in the bedroom with a kettle, food, toilet but I need to cut down on my heavy drinking.
Not seeing the world again to get away from pain is how I feel.
I don't feel very strong at all, there doe not see to be an end to all this but there must be an end to pain somewhere and somehow.
Surly I can't keep on feeling depressed like this, there's got to be light at the end of the tunnel somewhere.
All I do is write pages and pages of romantic poetry about you, it shows how mad and crazy I am about you which makes me mad and crazy when you don't feel the same about me.
How strange is that?
I feel ashamed to love someone who does not love me but my feelings have so much control over me.
There must be someone better out who loves me for me but I find it hard to believe that I will love him because foolishly my feelings are still with you.
I must love the wrong man, what is it about love it just blinds you?
Now you have gone, I must move on I must carry on without you.
It's hard to do because I miss you so true.
Everywhere I stand I see lovers kissing and hugging everyday.
They must think I have lost my way. Written 1997
I need help!
I need help to build my happiness back.
I need joy back in my life again.
I need help to end sorrow and pain.
It's hard to know if I will see a better day tomorrow.
The only way I can get on with life is write about how I feel about in my poetry day by day.
I know I need to help myself but I believe that will happen slowly.
I am not alone in this happiness, joy, sadness and sorrow.
It happens to every man, boy, girl and woman.
When problems have everyone needs their family and friends round them.
When help is given, things get taken on people when someone is stuffing from a break down.
The good thing is that you end up helping someone to get over the same thing as what you went through. written 1997
I miss my high romance.
I once had a high romance I'd have it back if I had a chance.
I don't think I will ever have the chance to get it back.
I will sleep, then see what tomorrow brings.
Before I sleep I puff the pillows up and weep.
I don't dream anymore, my dreams have turned to nightmares that's why I can't sleep.
I have nightmare of been hurt and nightmares of been alone.
I don't have any feelings of love to let out, I am just mixed in my mind.
I only have love inside me for one person but he does not love me.
My beauty in love has been loved but lost.
Now there's no beauty left to love.
May be I thought I was in love but I was not.
It's hard to know If I am in or out of love. written 1997
I need help to build my happiness back.
I need joy back in my life again.
I need help to end sorrow and pain.
It's hard to know if I will see a better day tomorrow.
The only way I can get on with life is write about how I feel about in my poetry day by day.
I know I need to help myself but I believe that will happen slowly.
I am not alone in this happiness, joy, sadness and sorrow.
It happens to every man, boy, girl and woman.
When problems have everyone needs their family and friends round them.
When help is given, things get taken on people when someone is stuffing from a break down.
The good thing is that you end up helping someone to get over the same thing as what you went through. written 1997
I miss my high romance.
I once had a high romance I'd have it back if I had a chance.
I don't think I will ever have the chance to get it back.
I will sleep, then see what tomorrow brings.
Before I sleep I puff the pillows up and weep.
I don't dream anymore, my dreams have turned to nightmares that's why I can't sleep.
I have nightmare of been hurt and nightmares of been alone.
I don't have any feelings of love to let out, I am just mixed in my mind.
I only have love inside me for one person but he does not love me.
My beauty in love has been loved but lost.
Now there's no beauty left to love.
May be I thought I was in love but I was not.
It's hard to know If I am in or out of love. written 1997
Lye in bed.
I lye bed wondering what kind of future I have left.
I'm trying to think about what I should do next.
I am trying to work out what is the right thing to do.
I never forget the first day we met it was the happiest day of my life yet.
My mind is so mixed up and confused about you I can't rest yet.
When you told me it was over, I knew I had lost you for good.
The sadness feels like death.
Very happy memories of you never forgotten.
I wish happiness and love with your future loves.
I know I can't change how you feel you love her not me. written 1997
I lye bed wondering what kind of future I have left.
I'm trying to think about what I should do next.
I am trying to work out what is the right thing to do.
I never forget the first day we met it was the happiest day of my life yet.
My mind is so mixed up and confused about you I can't rest yet.
When you told me it was over, I knew I had lost you for good.
The sadness feels like death.
Very happy memories of you never forgotten.
I wish happiness and love with your future loves.
I know I can't change how you feel you love her not me. written 1997
A man I thought I loved and lost.
There was once a lad I thought I had.
He was so charming at the time I thought he was the man.
He was such a bad lad, I must have been mad.
In the end he made me so sad.
When he was not in my life anymore I was gland.
He was such a Jack the lad, he went after so many girls with so many curls.
He put his untrue charm that didn't get him very far.
He lied to me, he told me he had a flash car that also didn't get him very far.
His name was Preen, who pretended to been keen.
He wasn't keen, he was mean.
He's a loser, who doesn't give a dam about any woman only having their money off them.
He was a con man and woman beater, user and abuser.
We talk about the man, gentleman and mouse, Preen wasn't either of them Preen was an evil rat!
He would sleep with girls, frightened them and give them fear of other men.
He would talk about their private life, he would break other relationships with a knife.
He gave me so much fear for many years in the relationship I had after, I am only just starting to trust now.
I was on my own for six mouth after me and Preen finished, I never thought I'd love again.
I regret ever knowing him let a lone going with him.
My next lover was alright but even though I loved him I had a job to trust him which drove him to another woman in the end.
I said to myself for a long time to be friends with someone and see how it goes.
I want someone who will get me over my fright and fear after all those years.
Did you get me through this dear?
No you didn't I got over it myself somehow.
I want someone who understands my problems, someone who has been there himself.
Now I have long come terms with what Steven Preen put me through but it took good many years to get over that.
He once loved me no he didn't it was a silly nightmare of mine.
I wanted someone who cared about me and who could help me come out of my problems.
My partner after Steven coped with it for a while then he could not stand anymore and then he came back to then now it's clashed for good. written 1997 - 2009.
There was once a lad I thought I had.
He was so charming at the time I thought he was the man.
He was such a bad lad, I must have been mad.
In the end he made me so sad.
When he was not in my life anymore I was gland.
He was such a Jack the lad, he went after so many girls with so many curls.
He put his untrue charm that didn't get him very far.
He lied to me, he told me he had a flash car that also didn't get him very far.
His name was Preen, who pretended to been keen.
He wasn't keen, he was mean.
He's a loser, who doesn't give a dam about any woman only having their money off them.
He was a con man and woman beater, user and abuser.
We talk about the man, gentleman and mouse, Preen wasn't either of them Preen was an evil rat!
He would sleep with girls, frightened them and give them fear of other men.
He would talk about their private life, he would break other relationships with a knife.
He gave me so much fear for many years in the relationship I had after, I am only just starting to trust now.
I was on my own for six mouth after me and Preen finished, I never thought I'd love again.
I regret ever knowing him let a lone going with him.
My next lover was alright but even though I loved him I had a job to trust him which drove him to another woman in the end.
I said to myself for a long time to be friends with someone and see how it goes.
I want someone who will get me over my fright and fear after all those years.
Did you get me through this dear?
No you didn't I got over it myself somehow.
I want someone who understands my problems, someone who has been there himself.
Now I have long come terms with what Steven Preen put me through but it took good many years to get over that.
He once loved me no he didn't it was a silly nightmare of mine.
I wanted someone who cared about me and who could help me come out of my problems.
My partner after Steven coped with it for a while then he could not stand anymore and then he came back to then now it's clashed for good. written 1997 - 2009.
It's hard to keep it quiet that I love you.
It's very hard to keep it quiet that I love you.
There are times I feel happy.
There are times I feel sad.
That depends on whether things are good or bad.
It's hard to love someone else after loving you so long.
Now I am upset more.
Don't get me wrong, I must tell myself that it's not the end of my life.
You did not have to love me for life.
Why does love and loneliness cause so much pain?
I understand now that I don't have to have a lover I can just have a good friend.
It's hard to explain, you can't live without love but you can't live with it either.
Whatever you do, do what makes you happy.
One thing I have learned in life, whatever it it is if you sussed try and try again but if someone let's you down in love and friendship, it's not going to work, I know I have had the pain more than once. written 1997 - 2001
Marriage.
Marriage should full of love and support.
Nine out of ten marriages end in divorce.
Marriage should be full of happiness and joy.
Marriages should be full of laughs not cry.
Marriages should be full of a girl and a boy.
We must accept love and marriage is not a bed of roses.
If it was perfect it would be boring.
Like all walks of life, marriage is either a success or it is not. Written 1997
You beauty is love forever.
Your beauty and love is forever.
Please sit and dream of wonderful love my lovely fella.
You will met the love of your life when it's lovely weather.
I can't say the love you choose will be me.
I hope and wish happiness for you to be.
May be one day you will met a lovely lady that will swim with you under the deep blue sea, I wish her to be sweeter than me.
I know it won't be me. Written 1997
It's very hard to keep it quiet that I love you.
There are times I feel happy.
There are times I feel sad.
That depends on whether things are good or bad.
It's hard to love someone else after loving you so long.
Now I am upset more.
Don't get me wrong, I must tell myself that it's not the end of my life.
You did not have to love me for life.
Why does love and loneliness cause so much pain?
I understand now that I don't have to have a lover I can just have a good friend.
It's hard to explain, you can't live without love but you can't live with it either.
Whatever you do, do what makes you happy.
One thing I have learned in life, whatever it it is if you sussed try and try again but if someone let's you down in love and friendship, it's not going to work, I know I have had the pain more than once. written 1997 - 2001
Marriage.
Marriage should full of love and support.
Nine out of ten marriages end in divorce.
Marriage should be full of happiness and joy.
Marriages should be full of laughs not cry.
Marriages should be full of a girl and a boy.
We must accept love and marriage is not a bed of roses.
If it was perfect it would be boring.
Like all walks of life, marriage is either a success or it is not. Written 1997
You beauty is love forever.
Your beauty and love is forever.
Please sit and dream of wonderful love my lovely fella.
You will met the love of your life when it's lovely weather.
I can't say the love you choose will be me.
I hope and wish happiness for you to be.
May be one day you will met a lovely lady that will swim with you under the deep blue sea, I wish her to be sweeter than me.
I know it won't be me. Written 1997
He will know when he's met the love of his life.
He will know when he has met the love of his life.
He will enjoy love better when the weather is better.
He will met the love of his life when the time is right.
He will live with and marry her to be his bride in time for the rest of his life . Written 1997.
The lover that was mine.
The one I love is burned alive.
He used to be a lover of mine but not at the end of time.
I do not want or love him anymore, he is no longer my lover.
I now have a have a new lover who is like no other.
I love my new lover ten times more than I loved my old lover.
I thought my new lover would find it hard to find me but it was not that hard after all.
This new lover is very very kind to me.
Now that I have a new heart that belongs to mine I can learn to get Antonio off my mind.
Once upon a time Antonio was mine.
Lynn took Antonio's heart away from mine, at the time I though she was not very kind but now I know I need to get him off my mind.
No matter how hard I try, I just can't get him off my mind. Autumn to winter 1997
Do I hope?
I will believe in myself a bit more.
I will get stronger in my self a stream if you know what I mean.
I will get rid of fears.
I have hope for the future rather than feeling as if I don't want to be on this planet anymore. Written 1997.
I know I can't expect all good luck.
Bad luck comes at it's worse.
When a lot of bad things can come at once then it all can be too much.
It does not hurt to turn to good luck. Written 1997.
He will know when he has met the love of his life.
He will enjoy love better when the weather is better.
He will met the love of his life when the time is right.
He will live with and marry her to be his bride in time for the rest of his life . Written 1997.
The lover that was mine.
The one I love is burned alive.
He used to be a lover of mine but not at the end of time.
I do not want or love him anymore, he is no longer my lover.
I now have a have a new lover who is like no other.
I love my new lover ten times more than I loved my old lover.
I thought my new lover would find it hard to find me but it was not that hard after all.
This new lover is very very kind to me.
Now that I have a new heart that belongs to mine I can learn to get Antonio off my mind.
Once upon a time Antonio was mine.
Lynn took Antonio's heart away from mine, at the time I though she was not very kind but now I know I need to get him off my mind.
No matter how hard I try, I just can't get him off my mind. Autumn to winter 1997
Do I hope?
I will believe in myself a bit more.
I will get stronger in my self a stream if you know what I mean.
I will get rid of fears.
I have hope for the future rather than feeling as if I don't want to be on this planet anymore. Written 1997.
I know I can't expect all good luck.
Bad luck comes at it's worse.
When a lot of bad things can come at once then it all can be too much.
It does not hurt to turn to good luck. Written 1997.
The love has come back to my heart.
My love has come back into my heart but I know that we live so far apart.
We must not upset the apple cart, we will look forward to seeing one another when we do. Written 1997.
Tonight I will sleep without you but I will still feel your love.
I wish now I could win your love for good.
You are too far away for me to love but I love very much.
I really hope our love will never ever end. Written 1997.
Love calms.
Love is like a breath of fresh air for a lad and lass to share.
When you are young you can never know how long it will last.
Love can be such a painful thing.
The dart hit the human love of his heart. Written 1997
When my lover has gone away.
When my lover has gone away, my whole life feels as if it's going down the drain.
What have I got, I won't want to be lonely but that's the way it is?
At the moment I need help off my friends.
I just need a man to love.
Could be any man?
In 1997 I though Ian Hucthinson was the man for me.
Would I believe in love at first site?
I am yet to see it once and the last time in my life.
That is a good question, I wish I really knew the answer. Written 1997
After a long time crying.
After a long time crying, I awake my crying eyes into happy eyes from my sleep.
The sere ct is that I love you again, I think I am falling back on my feet after a long crying sleep.
I faint back in my seat of the thought of being loved again.
When I awake again from a long nightmare, I open the curtains ( What do I see?)
I see the hot sunshine looking at me with blue blossoms on the tall trees.
Open the windows for fresh, smell or the blossoms.
Finely walk my lover in here, I am in the arms of the tender lips that will kiss.
His tender eyes appear with his tender happy smile.
He has a lovely sweet smile.
When we are together our hearts become on fire, only cold water can cool our desire. Written 1997.
My love has come back into my heart but I know that we live so far apart.
We must not upset the apple cart, we will look forward to seeing one another when we do. Written 1997.
Tonight I will sleep without you but I will still feel your love.
I wish now I could win your love for good.
You are too far away for me to love but I love very much.
I really hope our love will never ever end. Written 1997.
Love calms.
Love is like a breath of fresh air for a lad and lass to share.
When you are young you can never know how long it will last.
Love can be such a painful thing.
The dart hit the human love of his heart. Written 1997
When my lover has gone away.
When my lover has gone away, my whole life feels as if it's going down the drain.
What have I got, I won't want to be lonely but that's the way it is?
At the moment I need help off my friends.
I just need a man to love.
Could be any man?
In 1997 I though Ian Hucthinson was the man for me.
Would I believe in love at first site?
I am yet to see it once and the last time in my life.
That is a good question, I wish I really knew the answer. Written 1997
After a long time crying.
After a long time crying, I awake my crying eyes into happy eyes from my sleep.
The sere ct is that I love you again, I think I am falling back on my feet after a long crying sleep.
I faint back in my seat of the thought of being loved again.
When I awake again from a long nightmare, I open the curtains ( What do I see?)
I see the hot sunshine looking at me with blue blossoms on the tall trees.
Open the windows for fresh, smell or the blossoms.
Finely walk my lover in here, I am in the arms of the tender lips that will kiss.
His tender eyes appear with his tender happy smile.
He has a lovely sweet smile.
When we are together our hearts become on fire, only cold water can cool our desire. Written 1997.
Coming to terms with you and me apart.
I know I could not forget you if I wanted to.
I could not stop feeling in love with you.
When I did not see you I still could not stop loving you.I could stop caring for you. Written 1997.
Which is it to be love or loneliness for me?
Which is it to be love or loneliness for me to be?
Plenty of people have told me there are plenty more fish in the sea you see.
The amount of loves I have loved, I hope I will catch the fish or will he catch me?
There's always a fear back in my mind that my fish may jump back in the sea as they mostly do.
To be brave is the way to aim to be, otherwise I will always be frightened to love again. Written 1997.
I have had a lucky escape.
I have had a lucky escape, a lassie has taken my laddie Antonio away from me.
Now I am happy to say I have my new lover on my way.
At the end of the day happy history memories have melted away.
I hope I will be just as happy with this lover as I was with the other.
My new happiness washes my tears away.
I just hope my new lover is here to stay.
My old lover really truly hurt me.
I am glad to say that Antonio has gone away.
Now at last slowly my life is getting back together again.
It may well not be the same as what it used to be like.
I know deep inside my heart, I have had a lucky escape.
I never ever want my old lover back again.
I hope my new love won't turn out like my old love.
I will never forget the day we met on the 16th May 1994.
My older lover and I fell in love at first site, we should have known it was not right.
Now I have had a lucky escape I can move on with my life. Written 1997.
I know I could not forget you if I wanted to.
I could not stop feeling in love with you.
When I did not see you I still could not stop loving you.I could stop caring for you. Written 1997.
Which is it to be love or loneliness for me?
Which is it to be love or loneliness for me to be?
Plenty of people have told me there are plenty more fish in the sea you see.
The amount of loves I have loved, I hope I will catch the fish or will he catch me?
There's always a fear back in my mind that my fish may jump back in the sea as they mostly do.
To be brave is the way to aim to be, otherwise I will always be frightened to love again. Written 1997.
I have had a lucky escape.
I have had a lucky escape, a lassie has taken my laddie Antonio away from me.
Now I am happy to say I have my new lover on my way.
At the end of the day happy history memories have melted away.
I hope I will be just as happy with this lover as I was with the other.
My new happiness washes my tears away.
I just hope my new lover is here to stay.
My old lover really truly hurt me.
I am glad to say that Antonio has gone away.
Now at last slowly my life is getting back together again.
It may well not be the same as what it used to be like.
I know deep inside my heart, I have had a lucky escape.
I never ever want my old lover back again.
I hope my new love won't turn out like my old love.
I will never forget the day we met on the 16th May 1994.
My older lover and I fell in love at first site, we should have known it was not right.
Now I have had a lucky escape I can move on with my life. Written 1997.
What is love, where is love?
Love can be full of romantic wonderful things.
The happiest times should be when the birds sing in spring.
You just catch the right fish in the sea, that can be hard to be.
Sometimes love can end with anger, sorrow and pain.
Sometimes love can be such a strain.
Sometimes love can be anywhere to be.
Sometimes you can met love in the most strange places to be.
Love can happen anywhere to be, it could be under the sea. Written 1997
Love can be full of romantic wonderful things.
The happiest times should be when the birds sing in spring.
You just catch the right fish in the sea, that can be hard to be.
Sometimes love can end with anger, sorrow and pain.
Sometimes love can be such a strain.
Sometimes love can be anywhere to be.
Sometimes you can met love in the most strange places to be.
Love can happen anywhere to be, it could be under the sea. Written 1997
Some Men
I have had many friends but only one as a boyfriend if and when I have one.
Should say men friends or baby boys, friends, depending on whether they act their age or shoe size?
Do men ever grow up?
Where are these men to be?
When men goes down the pub women don't always see them unless the men are drunk.
Men will then go home and go to sleep.
Why can't I find love, who wants me?
Why can't there be a match bet ween their feelings and mine?
At the end of the day, they should know where their bread is buttered.
Women ask men anything then they keep too much to their chest. ( What's on your mind love?)
He should also know how to make the bed at his best.
If he does not know how to make his bed, he can still lye in it.
Sometimes I wish I was an animal, I would not cause any problem to other animals.
Whatever god wants me to be I must if god is to be.
A human being I was born to be.
I wish my love felt like a wild red rose.
I am a young lass who does not drink splits very often but when I do I land on my knees.
Through the hot summer I lye along the glass catching the sun on my body dreaming about the next gentleman to be.
Some men lock themselves in a room keeping their problems to their chest.
That's one thing woman do not do, they share their problems mostly with each other.
Men never really tell woman what is on their minds but woman tell men what's on their minds.
Girls are the best at getting things off their chests, men kept problems to their vests.
Some men tell their wives and girls to keep out their way to make the females worry about them.
Some men don't tell women anything.
It may hit some men more when love comes to an end. Late 1996 to mid 1997
I have had many friends but only one as a boyfriend if and when I have one.
Should say men friends or baby boys, friends, depending on whether they act their age or shoe size?
Do men ever grow up?
Where are these men to be?
When men goes down the pub women don't always see them unless the men are drunk.
Men will then go home and go to sleep.
Why can't I find love, who wants me?
Why can't there be a match bet ween their feelings and mine?
At the end of the day, they should know where their bread is buttered.
Women ask men anything then they keep too much to their chest. ( What's on your mind love?)
He should also know how to make the bed at his best.
If he does not know how to make his bed, he can still lye in it.
Sometimes I wish I was an animal, I would not cause any problem to other animals.
Whatever god wants me to be I must if god is to be.
A human being I was born to be.
I wish my love felt like a wild red rose.
I am a young lass who does not drink splits very often but when I do I land on my knees.
Through the hot summer I lye along the glass catching the sun on my body dreaming about the next gentleman to be.
Some men lock themselves in a room keeping their problems to their chest.
That's one thing woman do not do, they share their problems mostly with each other.
Men never really tell woman what is on their minds but woman tell men what's on their minds.
Girls are the best at getting things off their chests, men kept problems to their vests.
Some men tell their wives and girls to keep out their way to make the females worry about them.
Some men don't tell women anything.
It may hit some men more when love comes to an end. Late 1996 to mid 1997
I put my head in the sand.
No one seems to agree with my way of thinking when it comes to love so now my head is in the sand and my thoughts are kept to myself.
My head is in between hands I may not make the right choices in my life.
There seems to be no where forward than feeling as if I am sitting inside a train as it's driving through a dark tunnel that has not got to the light, it seems to go on forever.
There must be an end a dark tunnel somewhere.
Turn on the light please or is there no light?
I am scared of the present and the future.
I feel very lonely and very sad.
A lot of frights and fears are inside my mind.
Every time I tell people my thoughts it does not pleases them but it's pleases me, what pleases them does not please me, it's just time to wait and see or life is the end for me.
I understand people are only protecting me from getting hurt but my feelings have control over me, can't they see?
How can I love without being blind?
I may as well do what I want and let people talk all they like.
One thing I feel like is living my life in sin, no man does not seem to be right for me and I do not seem to be right for them. Written 1997.
You are my lover and your love is sweet.
You are my lover who gives me such a romantic time.
Lovely romance, so glad I have taken the chance.
I while make the most of it while this romance lasts.
I am a lass who loves to enjoy the chance of love and romance.
I love romantic gentlemen but there are not many about.
I could never ask for a romance to last forever because that's too much to ask.
When you kiss my lips your far to good to forget.
I miss your tender loving lips to bits.
One day my dear I fear that you may break my heart like many men have, then you will move onto another heart. Written 1997
No one seems to agree with my way of thinking when it comes to love so now my head is in the sand and my thoughts are kept to myself.
My head is in between hands I may not make the right choices in my life.
There seems to be no where forward than feeling as if I am sitting inside a train as it's driving through a dark tunnel that has not got to the light, it seems to go on forever.
There must be an end a dark tunnel somewhere.
Turn on the light please or is there no light?
I am scared of the present and the future.
I feel very lonely and very sad.
A lot of frights and fears are inside my mind.
Every time I tell people my thoughts it does not pleases them but it's pleases me, what pleases them does not please me, it's just time to wait and see or life is the end for me.
I understand people are only protecting me from getting hurt but my feelings have control over me, can't they see?
How can I love without being blind?
I may as well do what I want and let people talk all they like.
One thing I feel like is living my life in sin, no man does not seem to be right for me and I do not seem to be right for them. Written 1997.
You are my lover and your love is sweet.
You are my lover who gives me such a romantic time.
Lovely romance, so glad I have taken the chance.
I while make the most of it while this romance lasts.
I am a lass who loves to enjoy the chance of love and romance.
I love romantic gentlemen but there are not many about.
I could never ask for a romance to last forever because that's too much to ask.
When you kiss my lips your far to good to forget.
I miss your tender loving lips to bits.
One day my dear I fear that you may break my heart like many men have, then you will move onto another heart. Written 1997
I dream.
I dream of a young gentleman sweeping me off my feet.
Someone who I can have for the rest of my life which happens to very few people these days.
I dream of living to a great age and having no pain just a peaceful death.
Sitting and laying forever together by a sunny stream would be a perfect dream.
I dream of love and happiness for me and you but slow love not fast, that's how I want it to be, do you want the same too?
I hope our love will stay true.
I hope our love is not blind.
As a little girl I used to look at the fishes in the sea wondering the right fish in sea is for me.
I am still waiting for the right fish for me but I don't think I will ever catch him he may not even catch me.
I would love to think that our love is tender and kind to pass away.
Are you who I have been waiting for all my life?
I hope you are the gentleman for me.
I dream of us holding hands by the stream.
I dream of our love growing stronger and for longer and longer.
I hope that my love life is not just a dream.
I hope love is for you and me. Written 1997.
My heart is so full of love for you.
My heart is so full of love for you.
My lips is so tender enough to kiss you tender lips.
The summer sunshine should make our love rose enough.
I hope that we still love in heaven.
You are more than just the love of my life you also my best male friend.
For such sweetness you have it's hard to explain in words how I feel about you.
I want my future with you I hope it will happen to both of us.
I love you more than the earth and sea.
We love and rest at our best.
I will keep your heart when you need me and want me, you undo my heart with your key.
Your heart is tender enough for me. Written 1994 to 1996.
I dream of a young gentleman sweeping me off my feet.
Someone who I can have for the rest of my life which happens to very few people these days.
I dream of living to a great age and having no pain just a peaceful death.
Sitting and laying forever together by a sunny stream would be a perfect dream.
I dream of love and happiness for me and you but slow love not fast, that's how I want it to be, do you want the same too?
I hope our love will stay true.
I hope our love is not blind.
As a little girl I used to look at the fishes in the sea wondering the right fish in sea is for me.
I am still waiting for the right fish for me but I don't think I will ever catch him he may not even catch me.
I would love to think that our love is tender and kind to pass away.
Are you who I have been waiting for all my life?
I hope you are the gentleman for me.
I dream of us holding hands by the stream.
I dream of our love growing stronger and for longer and longer.
I hope that my love life is not just a dream.
I hope love is for you and me. Written 1997.
My heart is so full of love for you.
My heart is so full of love for you.
My lips is so tender enough to kiss you tender lips.
The summer sunshine should make our love rose enough.
I hope that we still love in heaven.
You are more than just the love of my life you also my best male friend.
For such sweetness you have it's hard to explain in words how I feel about you.
I want my future with you I hope it will happen to both of us.
I love you more than the earth and sea.
We love and rest at our best.
I will keep your heart when you need me and want me, you undo my heart with your key.
Your heart is tender enough for me. Written 1994 to 1996.
I thought he was the best I ever had, how wrong was I.
I thought he gave me what I wanted in life, he was my lover.
I don't think we will ever love one another again.
May be I will be with him in heaven.
Now I am without him my life is like hell.
If only he still loved me or if only I did not love him anymore.
If only he would have stayed with me he would have been still with me now.
If only he still wanted me.
The year is 1997, Monday 16th May 1994 we met, would have been three years today if we would have still together.
Whatever went wrong bet ween us for it to come to this?
Why did he leave me in the dark alone? Written May 16th 1997
Love poems.
I love you more than just a true friend.
Please would you be my true boyfriend or is that too much ask?
I have had so many men who have ended it with me so blue, I really want a love that's forever true.
It seems to me that you are true, I have a lot of trust in you.
Please don't rush things, I would really truly hate to lose you.
I love and miss you just as much.
May be one time I will become your bride but not for a long time yet, we have loads of time.
Please don't worry I would not dream of ending it with you because I easy get upset too.
I mean what I say is true, it's the whole truth nothing but the truth.
I hope you believe me too. Written 1997
Love and life.
Love can hurt you enough like a knife that goes through your veins.
When love ends it brings so much pain, strain and shame.
When love begins it can bring the sweetest of things.
With any luck your love will be mine right up to the end of time.
Sometimes love can be so mean when you are so keen, it sends up blind right until the end of your time. Written Late 20th century to early 21st century.
I want to be a writer 1997 - 2000
I want to be a writer, can you please help me write my first book?
My first book is my life story, can you please help me to set out to the pubic?
I am special needs and I need extra help than a writer who is not disabled.
Can you please help me?
I am very interested in short stories, novels, plays and poetry.
This poem was just about me wanting to be a writer.
My first book is my life story, can you please help me to set out to the pubic?
I am special needs and I need extra help than a writer who is not disabled.
Can you please help me?
I am very interested in short stories, novels, plays and poetry.
This poem was just about me wanting to be a writer.
Everyone should have friends everywhere.
Everyone's friend should be with them there.
Friends should be there to care and do things together for one another.
Keep hold of your friends but love comes and goes.
SCHOOL BULLING AND BAD FRIENDSHIP.
When I was a girl my school days were the worse days of my life.
I don't know why adults used to tell me that school days are the best years of your life.
The day I left school I felt peace.
School used to really get to me because in every school I went to there were bullies everywhere.
Bullies were my worse nightmare.
Bullies were the death of me.
I learned more out of school than in.
I was born in Wolverhampton.
I was born in Wolverhampton but sadly there's no sand and sea.
There's no summer year round to to be.
To me Wolverhampton is just where I live.
Roads, traffic, paths, houses, shops, pubs, night clubs and hospitals.
The traffic is a big danger to any animal and human being.
Wolverhampton is very dull and boring place to be.
Wolverhampton was bad enough when I wrote this poem but now due to smoking ban and credit crunch it's got even worse with very few people going in the pubs.
Peace and quiet for you and me.
Peace and quiet is a lovely sound for me because there's no noise to hear.
No war of guns and bombs outside our doors.
No fireworks going off through the midnight wind.
We have seen and heard everything that there is to hear.
Children go out to have fun without parents worrying whether there children are still living on this earth.
Adults should be able to know their children are safe, not anymore those days are gone.
This poem explains that it is not a peaceful world now it's got even worse with anti - social behavior.
Father Ray.
When I was a baby and small child, Father Ray use to take carry me, here there and everywhere.
He use to held my hand everywhere in Fathering care.
Father, Ray use to kiss and cuddle me with tender loving to be.
Father, Ray was always there to make sure I ate all my tea.
When I was fifteen years old he drove round the night clubs in Margate looking for me.
Father, Ray is such a gentleman and Dad to me better than my real Father has been.
In emergency Father, Ray is always there to care and to share.
Father, Ray is a loving Dad as much as he can be.
When it was my birthday Father, Ray was still here with me.
When my Mother told me that my Father was not Ray, I was confused not knowing what was happening to me.
I was mad, angry and I cried.
I was frightened to go to sleep that night in case I had nightmares.
When I was ill Father, Ray took care of me.
Confused parents make confused children, it does not help their relationships either still that's life. In my case I have just left a confused man over mouth ago after 15yrs. I am not confused now at least I hope not anyway.
LOVE.
One always wonders why we are all ever born.
Our parents fall in love and bring us to the world.
Most parents break and then that cause anger, hurt and pain to us all.
We fall in love and the pain of ended love hurts even more.
Love is like a story, love is like a book, please turn over a lot more than a thousand pages your welcome to have a look.
I have got to the stage of thinking either forever love or no love at all the pain is too much to cope with.
I hope I am wrong in thinking I could be so weak, I hope I become strong.
Will I ever met my forever love?
I have fallen in and out of love so many times every love I have had has a Farly tale dream story and nightmare in them.
Our dreams will more than likely come true but life is one big dream for you and me.
Summer at last
The unhappy winter has on far too long.
Summer is here at last but goes far too fast.
The trees were well covered with green leaves that are dark, light and bright green.
The birds are singing in the leaves and the eves. 1997 - 2000
Just a poem.
How do you write a poem?
In a poem you can write the words that you love.
You write the poem on paper then type it out to put in book.
What subject can you write poetry about?
You can write about friendship.
You can write about love.
You can write about the stars up, high, down and above.
You can write about anything you want and anything that comes to your mind.
Poetry is a shorter way to show your and people's feelings about life without writing a story.
A story book is lovely to read and look. 1997 - 2000
I'm your secret valentine.
Please be my secret valentine.
Wherever you are valentine please come into my mind.
I want someone to love me for me one day at the right time.
I have never meet anyone who truly wants to be mine.
I am always told that there's someone out there for someone at sometime.
I don't know if you are hard to find valentine.
Who is the valentine girl for you and who is the valentine boy for me?
Just you wait and see.
Come on valentine guess who I could be? Late 1996 - early 1997
Summer is here at last but goes far too fast.
The trees were well covered with green leaves that are dark, light and bright green.
The birds are singing in the leaves and the eves. 1997 - 2000
Just a poem.
How do you write a poem?
In a poem you can write the words that you love.
You write the poem on paper then type it out to put in book.
What subject can you write poetry about?
You can write about friendship.
You can write about love.
You can write about the stars up, high, down and above.
You can write about anything you want and anything that comes to your mind.
Poetry is a shorter way to show your and people's feelings about life without writing a story.
A story book is lovely to read and look. 1997 - 2000
I'm your secret valentine.
Please be my secret valentine.
Wherever you are valentine please come into my mind.
I want someone to love me for me one day at the right time.
I have never meet anyone who truly wants to be mine.
I am always told that there's someone out there for someone at sometime.
I don't know if you are hard to find valentine.
Who is the valentine girl for you and who is the valentine boy for me?
Just you wait and see.
Come on valentine guess who I could be? Late 1996 - early 1997
My mind is all over the place.
There must be men out there as true as Antonio.
Where are these men to be?
Why can't I find a love who want me for me?
Why can't I love who I want to be with?
Why who I want be with will he be with me?
Why can't his feelings match mine?
Still life is not all about me. Written mid summer to Autumn 1997.
There must be men out there as true as Antonio.
Where are these men to be?
Why can't I find a love who want me for me?
Why can't I love who I want to be with?
Why who I want be with will he be with me?
Why can't his feelings match mine?
Still life is not all about me. Written mid summer to Autumn 1997.
Please please make my day.
Please please make my day by coming back to me.
You have pleased me in a lot of ways before.
I hope I have pleased you before: whether you have or not I am pleased to be your girl.
You pleased for the kind of gentleman you were but what's happened to you now?
You will please me even more if you give me a surprise knocking at door.
I wish you will love me forever more.
Please write me a letter!
Please give me a call?
Please at least ask how I am?
This is too much for a woman to ask a man.
Why have you destroyed my heart and leave me so sad and blue?
You played into me because you knew I loved you and you know I still do.
It's so hard to believe what life would be without you, mainly when I am alone and you are with her.
If you don't want me, why can't you see sense and see someone better than her, it does not have to be me.
Why don't you try again my boy, your not good at picking women are you?
What have done wrong, other than finding it hard to fight the problems from my last lover before you?
Why do old relationships spoil it for new relationships?
Pain just takes ages to go.
OK I had one affair, you know he got me drank and got me where he wanted me.
Sorry that was a big mistake now you are making a bigger one.
Why do we keep on hurting one another more than loving one another?
Sorry I did not mean hurt I understand why you are getting your own back on me.
I did not mean to make you so sad and blue. Written 1997.
Please please make my day by coming back to me.
You have pleased me in a lot of ways before.
I hope I have pleased you before: whether you have or not I am pleased to be your girl.
You pleased for the kind of gentleman you were but what's happened to you now?
You will please me even more if you give me a surprise knocking at door.
I wish you will love me forever more.
Please write me a letter!
Please give me a call?
Please at least ask how I am?
This is too much for a woman to ask a man.
Why have you destroyed my heart and leave me so sad and blue?
You played into me because you knew I loved you and you know I still do.
It's so hard to believe what life would be without you, mainly when I am alone and you are with her.
If you don't want me, why can't you see sense and see someone better than her, it does not have to be me.
Why don't you try again my boy, your not good at picking women are you?
What have done wrong, other than finding it hard to fight the problems from my last lover before you?
Why do old relationships spoil it for new relationships?
Pain just takes ages to go.
OK I had one affair, you know he got me drank and got me where he wanted me.
Sorry that was a big mistake now you are making a bigger one.
Why do we keep on hurting one another more than loving one another?
Sorry I did not mean hurt I understand why you are getting your own back on me.
I did not mean to make you so sad and blue. Written 1997.
I think I am having a a breakdown.
I think I am having a nervous break down.
I feel like cracking up, I don't know what to do or where to turn.
I can't see what's a head of me.
Something or someone is pushing me over the edge.
What or and who could it be? 1997 - 2000
I think I am having a nervous break down.
I feel like cracking up, I don't know what to do or where to turn.
I can't see what's a head of me.
Something or someone is pushing me over the edge.
What or and who could it be? 1997 - 2000
You are our loving friends.
You are our loving friends.
We can't borrow you.
We can't buy or sell you.
We can't fire you.
We can't do much without you.
We can have fun with you.
We can fool around with you.
We can talk to you.
We can do a lot with you.
We will always be around you.
We hope you will be around us.
Whenever you want us we will be there.
When you don't want us, we won't bother you anywhere.
You may think sometimes that you don't have friends but we and other friends are around you are place some where. written 1998 - 1999.
We can't borrow you.
We can't buy or sell you.
We can't fire you.
We can't do much without you.
We can have fun with you.
We can fool around with you.
We can talk to you.
We can do a lot with you.
We will always be around you.
We hope you will be around us.
Whenever you want us we will be there.
When you don't want us, we won't bother you anywhere.
You may think sometimes that you don't have friends but we and other friends are around you are place some where. written 1998 - 1999.
Every girls dream and nightmare.
It's every girl's dream and nightmare to become a bride.
Not every girl is lucky to met a man of her kind.
Not every girl meets her prince charming the love of her life.
When becoming a man's wife it can be a story of a woman's life.
The amount of years good girls have to wait to be a gentleman's wife.
Having been a gentleman's wife it is not what we think might.
Some days can be a rather unhappy site to be a man's wife.
A wife might end up blowing into her kite.
Girls would you agree that a lot of men can be mites. Written 1997 - 2000
I love you Antonio my longest lasted laddie.
I love you Antonio my longest lasted laddie.
Why did you you go off with another lassie?
You know I love you so madly and sadly.
Now I will never ever have another laddie.
You broken my heart you mean Romano.
I fell in love with you so madly, gladly and sadly Antonio.
You are such a baddie but I love you.
I must be blind not to know that you'd treat me unkind.
Don't you have any love, care understanding on your mind?
I so very much wanted to be your bride so I must get that out of my mind. Written 1996 to 1997.
It's every girl's dream and nightmare to become a bride.
Not every girl is lucky to met a man of her kind.
Not every girl meets her prince charming the love of her life.
When becoming a man's wife it can be a story of a woman's life.
The amount of years good girls have to wait to be a gentleman's wife.
Having been a gentleman's wife it is not what we think might.
Some days can be a rather unhappy site to be a man's wife.
A wife might end up blowing into her kite.
Girls would you agree that a lot of men can be mites. Written 1997 - 2000
I love you Antonio my longest lasted laddie.
I love you Antonio my longest lasted laddie.
Why did you you go off with another lassie?
You know I love you so madly and sadly.
Now I will never ever have another laddie.
You broken my heart you mean Romano.
I fell in love with you so madly, gladly and sadly Antonio.
You are such a baddie but I love you.
I must be blind not to know that you'd treat me unkind.
Don't you have any love, care understanding on your mind?
I so very much wanted to be your bride so I must get that out of my mind. Written 1996 to 1997.
When you are frightened to love but frightened of being lonely without.
You are frightened of being alone but frightened to love the days and nights seem dull.
The future never seems to come because it's hard to believe that things will get better.
You are worried about getting hurt all over again which brings sadness and pain more and more.
You can feel shame, anger, guilt and happiness can be the only word that you aren't feeling at that moment.
You know that your not getting any younger and the future seems dull because the present is.
Trying to think about when you were happy is hard.
I can see myself just being an old maid because I can't seem to have trust in men.
Lynn you have taken all my happiness away I hope you will be more happy with Antonio than I was.
Antonio you never told me your reason for going off with Lynn, I guess I was never good enough for you.
I just need to learn how to get you out of my head and get on with my life, I should not have hung around where I was not wanted.
When a relationship has ended after such a long time it becomes a big shock.
Finding the best happiness is hard to find, it could take never or a long time.
Could you be wondering
what could become in the end. written 1997.
Thank you my loving caring friends.
Thank you for having trust in me.
Thank you for been trusting friends to me.
Thank you for listening to me what I have to say to you all.
Thank you for advising me and talking to me.
Thank you for giving the life that I really want.
I'd like to think I can do the same for you.
Without you you all giving me advice I would have cracked up.
I hope my dream will come true to love again.
Thank you for cheering me up when I am feeling down.
Thank you been there when I need you.
Thank you for been honest with me, I will try my best to be honest with you.
Thank you for helping me through disappointments in life.
I will be more than happy to help you you in every way and all the way.
Most of all thank you all for been very good friends and thank you for been you. 1997
You are frightened of being alone but frightened to love the days and nights seem dull.
The future never seems to come because it's hard to believe that things will get better.
You are worried about getting hurt all over again which brings sadness and pain more and more.
You can feel shame, anger, guilt and happiness can be the only word that you aren't feeling at that moment.
You know that your not getting any younger and the future seems dull because the present is.
Trying to think about when you were happy is hard.
I can see myself just being an old maid because I can't seem to have trust in men.
Lynn you have taken all my happiness away I hope you will be more happy with Antonio than I was.
Antonio you never told me your reason for going off with Lynn, I guess I was never good enough for you.
I just need to learn how to get you out of my head and get on with my life, I should not have hung around where I was not wanted.
When a relationship has ended after such a long time it becomes a big shock.
Finding the best happiness is hard to find, it could take never or a long time.
Could you be wondering
what could become in the end. written 1997.
Thank you my loving caring friends.
Thank you for having trust in me.
Thank you for been trusting friends to me.
Thank you for listening to me what I have to say to you all.
Thank you for advising me and talking to me.
Thank you for giving the life that I really want.
I'd like to think I can do the same for you.
Without you you all giving me advice I would have cracked up.
I hope my dream will come true to love again.
Thank you for cheering me up when I am feeling down.
Thank you been there when I need you.
Thank you for been honest with me, I will try my best to be honest with you.
Thank you for helping me through disappointments in life.
I will be more than happy to help you you in every way and all the way.
Most of all thank you all for been very good friends and thank you for been you. 1997
