My RELATIONSHIP EXPERIENCE

Things can change people, since my Nan has died, my ex boyfriend Anthony doesn't seem to know whether he still wants me or not, he just completely confuses me. May be I have changed since my Nan has died without noticing. On the other hand he could have changed. When I asked him if I have changed, he wouldn't tell me . The way my Nam's death has affected me, may have affected me and us as a couple. I have tried very hard to get on with my life by with with Mencap. I have always wanted to help others like myself anyway. Where would I have been without Mencap? I still would have helped Mencap out no matter what. Without Mencap. I would have felt very down and depressed. I can not bare it without keeping myself busy. I still have my ups and downs like we all do, just like we all do when we lose people close to us. I do understand that life goes thought. My Nan wouldn't want me looking at the four walls all day long. She would have wanted me to keep busy. I know she's not going to come back but I know she'd be pleased with what I am doing at Mencap. Being busy is a great thing to do whatever you are going through. This is why I feel it's right people with disabilities should have the rights the education and career they want. I don't believe it's healthy not to have anything to look forward to.It's even better to feel you have achieved something for your future and life not to kill the hours in the day or night. It would be great for us to get paid work like non - disabled people.

May be a lot of people like myself have felt as if life isn't worth living because of a having learning disabilities. The more skills I have achieved the more I now think life is worth living. Please keep improving the support!

The least Anthony could have done was to be a bit supported rather letting my affects of Nan's death affect both of us, Nan wouldn't have wanted that. Still that's the way he wants it, there's plenty more fish in the sea. Even though, it's hard to come terms with over thirteen yrs on and off, we've know each other just over fourteen yrs now.

One thing I am trying to learn is not to fall in love too easily. When things go wrong the stress gets too much. Love isn't all it cuts out to be but that doesn't mean you have to be lonely. What we also have to remember is that we have to go through the same ups and downs in life as non - disabled people.

OK, we may well have our health problems but life is full of learning.
We just need to to keep ourselves busy and come to term with these disappointments in our own time. Being strong is the answer not weak. I know it's not easy because we have to learn to not let these things get to us, these things happen whether we like it or not.
It is hard at first but life changes, new things happen in it's own time and new people come into our lives. If you come across the same thing in life as I have, don't hold on to it too tight, you will find it's hard to let go.

There are all kinds of disabilities but if they have high support needs, for eg: such things likes needing to be bathed, taken to the toilet and etc can be hard work for people without disabilities, I'm not saying that you are all the same though.

• How can people need to change things to treat us equal to them?

• People should treat people with disabilities equal to them selves.

• We cannot help the way we are, we didn't create our disabilities, we didn't plan to be hard work for you.

A disability can be caused at birth or even in an accident after birth. A lot of people have been with disabilities before an accident. It could take a long time before you can get your life back how it used be or not at all. You could find that you may need more help with everything than what you need now. This how disabilities can affect you.My disability happened at the birth but I understand how a disability in accident change people's lives at lot if they haven't been disabled before.


Never turn someone down because they have a disability, you would be hurt if you were their shoes. Please treat people with disabilities the same as how you want to be treated if you had disabilities.

This is why we think it's only fair that you support us, give us as many equal rights as possible, which still isn't good enough, it needs to get better all areas of life. We need to move on with the times, put the old fashioned times behind us. Families and carers can be very over protected so we need to them to support their children to have equal lives, still keeping them save but not wrapping them up in cotton wool.

We agree that we aren't getting enough support yet but Mencap work hard everyday to see that people with disabilities get equal lives. People in the Mencaps' groups who have disabilities such as myself, are willing to work hard to see that other people with disabilities get a better support than we did.

• We hope that we can achieve an equal live for people with disabilities for future generations to come.

• Sadly we must accept that time is slow, it's taken us far too many years to get where we are now.

• I guess it will take even longer for us to make things better.
  

• I suppose better late than never but sometimes you fear a lot of things aren't going to happen but we can't get everything we want.

• We hope that other people, their carers and etc get better support than what our families, carers and ourselves did.
  

• I know I'm not that old but some things it's too late for but other things it's never too late for, that's life. As long as I can see others happy that's the main thing for me now.
  

• Things still have changed a lot since my birth, my childhood teenager yrs and even the beginning of my adulthood.

It's our job to train non - disabled people to accept people with disabilities as equal as possible and give us the right support we need and want.

HOME SUPPORT

I hope to be asking Our Shout if they would like a social worker at pond lane Health where we have a lot of our health meetings, if so I will give Our Shout's answer in the pond Lane meeting.

I would be interested to know how many people with disabilities get support in their homes, such as cooking, shopping and etc. I don't think it should depend on what disabilities people have, it should depend on levels of support people with disabilities want and need by their choice because people with disabilities should have the rights to live their lives how they want.
I was very disappointed to read in the report Tell It As It Is. I think this was the Mencap report, I was reading. People with learning disabilities, families and carers have complained about the charges they have to pay for home support because their benefits don't enough. I myself have just copied with family support since people with learning disabilities and their families have had to pay. I don't think it's right because people with disabilities shouldn't have the blame for having disabilities, we don't ask to be the way we are. No one asks to be born but no one asks to have a disability either.

If you have any views on this subject, I'd be very happy to receive your email thank you. If you are a carer, family member, parents, friends, people with a disability or and etc, you are welcome to send me an email about anything you want whether it's worries or not. I can't promise I can help with everything but I can promise for sure that I will listen and respond back to you in the best way I can. I would be interested in any story you may want to tell if you want to for eg: may be if you have been charged too much money for Home Support. I am hoping we will be able to vote the government may be next year to put a stop to these charges, which as I have said had been in the Mencap report.
If you would like to email me about home support sarajgorman@google.com or sarajgorman@gmail.com. You can even email Mencap if you want, who may possibly know more than me on any subject. The email addresses could be the same but difference people deal with difference subjects.