I'm alone not alone.
Loneliness is my friend who doesn't reply back when been spoken to.
Loneliness is my home.
If I want a reply to what I say I'm out and about.
Night time is the time when I'm out even if people don't speak to me.
Life carries on without you even though I love you so much.
When I'm out I don't if and when I see you again but seeing little of you suits me fine.
My bed is calling and waiting for me at the end of the night or the morning light.
Loneliness is waiting for me yet again therefore no one knows my private thoughts about me and you other than me and you.
When I can't sleep I think about you.
When I sleep I have deep dreams about you.
If I sleep at all woken by heavy traffic and very strong winds, how very strange?
I'm not a lone to be alone. 18.9.2011
Sorry I can't sleep.
I keep counting sheep every time I try to sleep.
May be I have lost count of the sheep.
They keep me awake by saying.
Baa baa!
It seems like a thousand years since I saw you to love you or sorry was it only today or yesterday?
We may have to wait to see one another forever, it may be today, tomorrow, whenever or never.
Never mind look forward to seeing you next time whenever that is.
I may not be a very good sleeper but mornings are now too cold to get out of bed.
It's too warm in bed.18.9.2011
Never ending!
It's not always possible to love the same person forever.
The good is not spending a lot of time together.
The bad is too many heart breaks.
Love seems to be an never ending circle from one lover to other.
Happiness last as long or as short as it's meant to be.
Loving one person for for life these days is very rare.
I don't think forever love will happen to me, which one way is a good thing but another way is a bad thing.
I've cried so many times over broken love, I guess I have many tears to come.
I've been happy so many times in love I guess more love to come that more than likely won't last.
Love starts and ends.
It's hard to know whether to believe in hope or not.
I guess commitment isn't always cut out to be these days. 18.9.2011
The sun isn't bright enough without you.
It's been a long time since I saw the sky the night before the sun.
The air is too cold for the birds to fly.
The sun isn't warm or bright enough without you.
I think about you non stop.
I can never seem to give up on your love.
Nothing seems to stop me feeling the way I do about you.
At times I'm in my own world.
Your on my mind so much I can't sleep.
When I'm a sleep it's hard to wake up, my dreams are so deep about you.
Sometimes I wish I could a bird so I could fly to you.
Every day is unknown whether it's a good or bad day.
I wish I climb trees to make and collect leaves to build a nest to rest at my very best.
I'm the bird of the sea, come fly with me.
As we hit the tide coming and out with the waves under our feet, that is the love of you. 18.9.2011
Change of seasons.
There's no longer a long winter.
There's no longer a long summer.
The weather has a mind of it own at any time all year round.
Paint a picture of an ideal world.
The sky.
The sun.
The sea.
The sand.
The trees.
The gardens.
So the list goes on.
No winter is winter in winter time, it's winter when it wants to be.
The snowman for children is now a fairly tale dream. 18.9.2011
Monday, 19 September 2011
Sunday, 18 September 2011
Childhood memory.
I started of as an only for the first 13 years of my life. In one way I loved it but in another way I hated it. Called talking to yourself the first sign of madness but it created my world, no one answered me back other than my dolls and soft toys. On the other hand it was a lonely world when their isn't anyone who can communicate or and understand you. When there are a lot of adults around the world seems bigger and better than what you are.
When I was ten years old, I walked into class on Monday morning after the weekend. I knew what I had do, write in my rough about what I did over the weekend, this was about the only thing liked doing in school apart from art, history, English and swimming.
Not many children including myself got on with Old Miss Cole at Kingswood Special boarding Albrighton Wolverhampton. Even the look of her scared us let alone when she shouted at us. I can see this woman only about 50 looking over 90 when I think about it today. Her clacked wriggled face, her black and white dog checked coat. Everyday I used to dread facing her but my word I respect so much for making me the person I am today.
My word I wish I would have kept my rough books because I wrote some things that were and were not true just because I loved writing yet I had no thoughts of wanting to be a writer. Some stories were true one Monday, next Monday untrue stories and Monday after true and untrue was mixed.
My Nan Letty was my Mother, my Mother Jane known as Sam was my sister, my Auntie Vicci was my sister and my Nan as my Mother had at least three made up children in my stories. Many I have forgotten because I wrote in 1979. My writing about that weekend, the events were true but some people were real but different people.
When Miss Cole read my work, she went mad as she slapped my leg with a ruler, which shock me up for the rest of day. As for my writing, it helped me create my own world gave me grief off adults in the real world. In the end taught me not to tell lies only in writing stories or if I have to tell white lies. I never thought about wanting to be a writer until I was 23 but as for my rough book I was just a lonely child.
" Telling lies can get you into big trouble, Sara!"
When I was ten years old, I walked into class on Monday morning after the weekend. I knew what I had do, write in my rough about what I did over the weekend, this was about the only thing liked doing in school apart from art, history, English and swimming.
Not many children including myself got on with Old Miss Cole at Kingswood Special boarding Albrighton Wolverhampton. Even the look of her scared us let alone when she shouted at us. I can see this woman only about 50 looking over 90 when I think about it today. Her clacked wriggled face, her black and white dog checked coat. Everyday I used to dread facing her but my word I respect so much for making me the person I am today.
My word I wish I would have kept my rough books because I wrote some things that were and were not true just because I loved writing yet I had no thoughts of wanting to be a writer. Some stories were true one Monday, next Monday untrue stories and Monday after true and untrue was mixed.
My Nan Letty was my Mother, my Mother Jane known as Sam was my sister, my Auntie Vicci was my sister and my Nan as my Mother had at least three made up children in my stories. Many I have forgotten because I wrote in 1979. My writing about that weekend, the events were true but some people were real but different people.
When Miss Cole read my work, she went mad as she slapped my leg with a ruler, which shock me up for the rest of day. As for my writing, it helped me create my own world gave me grief off adults in the real world. In the end taught me not to tell lies only in writing stories or if I have to tell white lies. I never thought about wanting to be a writer until I was 23 but as for my rough book I was just a lonely child.
" Telling lies can get you into big trouble, Sara!"
Sunday, 11 September 2011
September 11th diary 2001
I remember ten years ago today been an very unhappy day. I rang my Father round about 4pm on that Tuesday afternoon. He asked me to put the television on. There was a very serious tone in his voice. I asked him why and he told me. I felt just the same all over again like when I heard the news about John Lennon just over twenty years before hand. Yet again the experience of hearing the news was so hard to talk and write about.
When I put the news on, I saw the New York towers fall really fast through a dramatic explosion like a para shoot going through the air. Nothing sank into me at first until I saw it on the news. A I watched those towers falling down my stomach was turning over as if I was on a roller coaster ride.
This all happened in Washington as well as New York. It hit nine people alive from the World Trade Centre. A fireman had been hit on the 38rd floor of one of the towers.
Wednesday 12th September 2001
The sad est part is that places like New York is so easy to get hit because the buildings are so well known. Mainly buildings like the towers with them been very tall.
One American lady had said
" It has destroyed a lot of lives as well as homes and buildings."
The fireman had told the rescuers that he had been rolling down the stairwell, floor by floor. The whole building had collapsed. There were five other firefighters and a police offer still there to be saved.
Thursday 13th September 2001
The morning I heard that one hundred English people had been killed in New York through explosion.
Yesterday President of American George Brush vowed to bring justice. Just like everyone he was very upset and angry. He also wants to know who has done this damage to the USA.
I think I heard on the news last night that they want to cause the English army out.
Two brothers were aboard hijacked Untied flights 175, which crushed into the World Trade.
Four planes had 266 people aboard. 100 - 800 people may be dead at the pentagon.
Friday 14th September 2001. At 11.00am at Saint Paul's Cathral there was a service for 500 English people who died in USA. There was also a 3 minutes quite.
This has cost so many people's lives and damaged buildings, my thoughts go out to people who have lost people or and buildings.
Monday 17th September 2001 USA is back to work but I guess there are still a lot of people who can't cope with going back to work at least not yet. Bare in mind that some people have lost a lot of businesses, even worse some people homes. President Brush had added.
" I want Bin Laden dead or burned alive."
Its sounds to me as if Bin Laden is guilty of theses attacks on USA. They think that Bin Laden had many terriorists involved but it's still unsure. President Brush does have a very strong feeling that it's Bin Laden. More than likely Brush is right but he shouldn't jump the gun it could be anyone from anywhere. Planes going into towers is anyone's guess. No one can blame Brush for been upset and angry though.
Thursday 18th September 2001. 30 odd years to Jimi Hendrick's death, I bet he's rolling in his grave with the USA coming to war again.
It's now been a week since the attacks. No one can really say how long this war will last. President Brush added.
" This war could go on a very long time."
My Father added.
" This war could go on another 30 years."
This war is very hard to come to terms with. Life has to go on but never rush people to rebuild their lives. The world had no choice but to accept the war, it will stay as long as it's going to. We need to take it day by day.
Wednesday 19th September 2001.
I can't say whether I'm right or wrong, mostly wars are about greed, jealously and not accepting people who and they are. We are all human beings at the end of the day. The colour of our skin and the way we talk shouldn't matter to anyone. Life is hard enough on it's own without making matters worse. We should live a life of choice if not why are we born? Why is there a world in the first place if we can't enjoy life?
Thursday 20th September 2001.
I believe the war will go on for ten years but nothing can be so sure.Every day is unknown, we shouldn't judge what we don't know for sure.
Since and before the Gulf war, we have heard enough about robbings, murders and etc without causing more wars. More of these things are talked about more now than ever before. Now we need to watch our backs all the time, which makes wars worse. That doesn't make the 1st or 2nd World War any worse or better than this one.
When I put the news on, I saw the New York towers fall really fast through a dramatic explosion like a para shoot going through the air. Nothing sank into me at first until I saw it on the news. A I watched those towers falling down my stomach was turning over as if I was on a roller coaster ride.
This all happened in Washington as well as New York. It hit nine people alive from the World Trade Centre. A fireman had been hit on the 38rd floor of one of the towers.
Wednesday 12th September 2001
The sad est part is that places like New York is so easy to get hit because the buildings are so well known. Mainly buildings like the towers with them been very tall.
One American lady had said
" It has destroyed a lot of lives as well as homes and buildings."
The fireman had told the rescuers that he had been rolling down the stairwell, floor by floor. The whole building had collapsed. There were five other firefighters and a police offer still there to be saved.
Thursday 13th September 2001
The morning I heard that one hundred English people had been killed in New York through explosion.
Yesterday President of American George Brush vowed to bring justice. Just like everyone he was very upset and angry. He also wants to know who has done this damage to the USA.
I think I heard on the news last night that they want to cause the English army out.
Two brothers were aboard hijacked Untied flights 175, which crushed into the World Trade.
Four planes had 266 people aboard. 100 - 800 people may be dead at the pentagon.
Friday 14th September 2001. At 11.00am at Saint Paul's Cathral there was a service for 500 English people who died in USA. There was also a 3 minutes quite.
This has cost so many people's lives and damaged buildings, my thoughts go out to people who have lost people or and buildings.
Monday 17th September 2001 USA is back to work but I guess there are still a lot of people who can't cope with going back to work at least not yet. Bare in mind that some people have lost a lot of businesses, even worse some people homes. President Brush had added.
" I want Bin Laden dead or burned alive."
Its sounds to me as if Bin Laden is guilty of theses attacks on USA. They think that Bin Laden had many terriorists involved but it's still unsure. President Brush does have a very strong feeling that it's Bin Laden. More than likely Brush is right but he shouldn't jump the gun it could be anyone from anywhere. Planes going into towers is anyone's guess. No one can blame Brush for been upset and angry though.
Thursday 18th September 2001. 30 odd years to Jimi Hendrick's death, I bet he's rolling in his grave with the USA coming to war again.
It's now been a week since the attacks. No one can really say how long this war will last. President Brush added.
" This war could go on a very long time."
My Father added.
" This war could go on another 30 years."
This war is very hard to come to terms with. Life has to go on but never rush people to rebuild their lives. The world had no choice but to accept the war, it will stay as long as it's going to. We need to take it day by day.
Wednesday 19th September 2001.
I can't say whether I'm right or wrong, mostly wars are about greed, jealously and not accepting people who and they are. We are all human beings at the end of the day. The colour of our skin and the way we talk shouldn't matter to anyone. Life is hard enough on it's own without making matters worse. We should live a life of choice if not why are we born? Why is there a world in the first place if we can't enjoy life?
Thursday 20th September 2001.
I believe the war will go on for ten years but nothing can be so sure.Every day is unknown, we shouldn't judge what we don't know for sure.
Since and before the Gulf war, we have heard enough about robbings, murders and etc without causing more wars. More of these things are talked about more now than ever before. Now we need to watch our backs all the time, which makes wars worse. That doesn't make the 1st or 2nd World War any worse or better than this one.
Sunday, 24 July 2011
What's on your mind?
You are more than welcome to what you want to say or write.
It makes no difference if what's on your mind is happy or say.
Just bring out anything you want to say or write.
Everyone likes to keep most things private no one is force to say or write.
The choice is yours on how you open your world and mind on what you say or write.
How people communicate with you is depending on what subject you say or write.
Some people don't communicate at all.
Please speak and write your mind.
Don't speak or write your mind if you don't want to. 24.7.2011
Mark David Chapman.
What was on your Mind to commit such a crime to the famous Beatles, old, too young to leave earth he gave his fans such good times?
You may not be able to mend what's been broken?
Saying sorry may not mend the damage.
You have already long sent John Lennon up to heaven.
Do you believe in Jesus Christ?
Do you believe that Christ will come back to life?
Do you believe John Lennon was or could have been Jesus Christ just like he wanted to be?
The answers to these questions are very unknown.
Do you believe that there will be peace on earth as well as there may be in heaven?
I was eleven when my old school teacher Mr Stroll told me and many others in class that John Lennon has gone to heaven, I still hear Mr Stroll telling us 31 years on now.
Do you believe that Christ will come back to life, even so you shouldn't have done what you have done?13.8.2011
Nothing lasts forever.
Nothing lasts forever but I have fallen for you.
You may not be always in my life but you will be always on my mind.
It isn't all about my feelings, it's about your feelings too.
The same way love always end, you may well leave me some day.
I will never give up on love.
No one knows unless they try, never build ones hopes up but never say never.
One's luck may not be the same as it has already been.
Life is very unknown, if we knew everything there would be no surprises or shocks. 13.8.2011
We should all control our minds.
We should all control our minds then there wouldn't be so much crime.
No reason is a reason to kill.
There's no perfect world out there, we all disagree with what one another do and say sometimes if not all of the time.
We say about children and teenagers been unkind to one another so can adults.
If we really can't cope with what we hear or see or even both in many cases can be, then just walk away.
Help is better out there than it used to be, now there's counselling out there, there never used to be any help at all but we still have a long way to go.
Just because Yoko Ono is Japanese, Mark David Chapman killed John Lennon many years to the day of Pearl Habela which the Japanese turned against the Americans on the 8th December.
No one can like everyone but hate is a very strong word.
14th August 2011
The world is a strange place.
The world is a strange like you and me, it has good and bad.
How we face the world isn't the same.
Life is what we make it.
We are the people who live in this world.
The world isn't the problem it's us in it.
The main thing is is how we are to one another.
There are a lot of thought we need to keep to ourselves.
At times it all gets too much.
No one is going to help us unless we help ourselves.
We need to find ways of not letting the bad in life play with our minds.
We must think about good things in life.
Clear the bad things out of our minds.
The good may be hard to think about.
For me writing poetry helps me get on with my life by writing all my thoughts down on paper out my mind.
Drawing, painting and exercise biking riding is also very good cure for me.
Anxiety isn't the only reason for doing these things, enjoyment comes into it too.
14th August 2011
Every day.
I miss you every day.
My world is empty without you.
Nothing seems to change but I accept it because I think so much of you.
I don't think I will ever give on you unless you give up me.
When the sun shines it doesn't shine unless I'm with you.
There's not a moment that I'm not wishing I was with you.
Holding me all night until the morning light.
The good may be hard to think about with the very little time we spend together.
Hopefully that little time we get together will help us to be together longer than if we spent a lot of time together.
I will just do my best to clear the bad out of my mind by writing poetry.
I never know when to text or call in case I contact you at the wrong moment.
However long or short our time together is better than nothing at all. 18.8.2011
Wem please sounds like Wembley.
I have never written a poem, short story, novel or play on the train.
I was travelling from Newtown Powys Wales in the mid to late 80s.
My memory has been that many a times through my life I caught the wrong well almost the wrong train.
Once I nearly went to Wembley when I should have gone to Wem.
The ticket collector said
" Off to Wembley."
"No, I'm off to Wem."
He laughed but I was only 17 and scared.
I was just in a world of my own still relieving on the rest of the world.
"No worries, you can get off at Sherwbucy." he said
" Who ordered the ticket?" he asked
" My tutor." I said
I tried to work out what must have happened, I thought about it.
A lot of people on the train stared at me as if I was mad as I started to laugh.
Wem please sounds like Wembley.
When got off the train to meet my Mother Shrewbucy, she said.
" I've been waiting half an hour for you at Wem station.
When I told her the reason her feelings were mixed with worrying about me and the funny side of Wem been mistaken for Wembley. 18.8.2011
Your worth the wait.
I feel love for you.
I need your love even more than plants, flowers and trees need the sun and the rain.
This love will never die until I die however long I wait.
If I'm wrong I can be right all the time.
I'd rather miss you than lose you but I can't except your feelings to be the same as mine all the time.
You may leave me some day, then I will have to move on from the light to the day.
If things change for you and me, if ever there's going be another he, he will have to spent more time missing me than kissing me. 18.8.2011
I will never again chase love.
Love will have to come to me if ever again it's to be.
I never looked for you, you found me.
If it doesn't work out for us the next love will be very close friends you and me are or where.
Who knows what the future will be.
Take life day by day.
Don't build one's hopes up: never say never.
Wait and see. 18.8.2011
Open up your mind.
If you feel as if something should be said then say it.
Don't be scared, don't be shy just open your mind.
Some people feels as if they don't want to talk about sad thing but they feel as they need to.
Please give their own time when things are to talk that they want or and need to said mainly when it's sad things.
Some things are hard to talk about but better off not talking about in a lot of people's minds. 19.8.2011
Fits Epilepsy. Why have I not been well for twelve months or so? What's wrong with me? My body is like a moving machine as I get shock in my knees and legs. I start shaking as I get a headache. Fits feel like storms through my head. Water is fusing inside my head. All my muscles go very tense which is caused by stress. My brain gives me a message to my body. I feel and go dizzy through a lack of food and drink. My head is aching as if someone has put a bomb inside it. I have been feeling sick, dizzy, shaky and my head feels heavy. Flashing lights are worse and when the sun gets in my eyes. When opening my eyes it's like my eyes flicker at anything flashing as if I'm going blind. Loud knocking sounds and fire works make me jump out my skin and scars me to death, mainly on Bonfire night. Many different sounds can bring on a fit. Time to lye down, let the fit stop in it's own time as I sleep it off. In the mean time it feels like wires are going through my head. Fuses are blowing everywhere like the wind and the rain coming together the same as thundering and lighting. 26.5.2002 -2.6.2012
It makes no difference if what's on your mind is happy or say.
Just bring out anything you want to say or write.
Everyone likes to keep most things private no one is force to say or write.
The choice is yours on how you open your world and mind on what you say or write.
How people communicate with you is depending on what subject you say or write.
Some people don't communicate at all.
Please speak and write your mind.
Don't speak or write your mind if you don't want to. 24.7.2011
Mark David Chapman.
What was on your Mind to commit such a crime to the famous Beatles, old, too young to leave earth he gave his fans such good times?
You may not be able to mend what's been broken?
Saying sorry may not mend the damage.
You have already long sent John Lennon up to heaven.
Do you believe in Jesus Christ?
Do you believe that Christ will come back to life?
Do you believe John Lennon was or could have been Jesus Christ just like he wanted to be?
The answers to these questions are very unknown.
Do you believe that there will be peace on earth as well as there may be in heaven?
I was eleven when my old school teacher Mr Stroll told me and many others in class that John Lennon has gone to heaven, I still hear Mr Stroll telling us 31 years on now.
Do you believe that Christ will come back to life, even so you shouldn't have done what you have done?13.8.2011
Nothing lasts forever.
Nothing lasts forever but I have fallen for you.
You may not be always in my life but you will be always on my mind.
It isn't all about my feelings, it's about your feelings too.
The same way love always end, you may well leave me some day.
I will never give up on love.
No one knows unless they try, never build ones hopes up but never say never.
One's luck may not be the same as it has already been.
Life is very unknown, if we knew everything there would be no surprises or shocks. 13.8.2011
We should all control our minds.
We should all control our minds then there wouldn't be so much crime.
No reason is a reason to kill.
There's no perfect world out there, we all disagree with what one another do and say sometimes if not all of the time.
We say about children and teenagers been unkind to one another so can adults.
If we really can't cope with what we hear or see or even both in many cases can be, then just walk away.
Help is better out there than it used to be, now there's counselling out there, there never used to be any help at all but we still have a long way to go.
Just because Yoko Ono is Japanese, Mark David Chapman killed John Lennon many years to the day of Pearl Habela which the Japanese turned against the Americans on the 8th December.
No one can like everyone but hate is a very strong word.
14th August 2011
The world is a strange place.
The world is a strange like you and me, it has good and bad.
How we face the world isn't the same.
Life is what we make it.
We are the people who live in this world.
The world isn't the problem it's us in it.
The main thing is is how we are to one another.
There are a lot of thought we need to keep to ourselves.
At times it all gets too much.
No one is going to help us unless we help ourselves.
We need to find ways of not letting the bad in life play with our minds.
We must think about good things in life.
Clear the bad things out of our minds.
The good may be hard to think about.
For me writing poetry helps me get on with my life by writing all my thoughts down on paper out my mind.
Drawing, painting and exercise biking riding is also very good cure for me.
Anxiety isn't the only reason for doing these things, enjoyment comes into it too.
14th August 2011
Every day.
I miss you every day.
My world is empty without you.
Nothing seems to change but I accept it because I think so much of you.
I don't think I will ever give on you unless you give up me.
When the sun shines it doesn't shine unless I'm with you.
There's not a moment that I'm not wishing I was with you.
Holding me all night until the morning light.
The good may be hard to think about with the very little time we spend together.
Hopefully that little time we get together will help us to be together longer than if we spent a lot of time together.
I will just do my best to clear the bad out of my mind by writing poetry.
I never know when to text or call in case I contact you at the wrong moment.
However long or short our time together is better than nothing at all. 18.8.2011
Wem please sounds like Wembley.
I have never written a poem, short story, novel or play on the train.
I was travelling from Newtown Powys Wales in the mid to late 80s.
My memory has been that many a times through my life I caught the wrong well almost the wrong train.
Once I nearly went to Wembley when I should have gone to Wem.
The ticket collector said
" Off to Wembley."
"No, I'm off to Wem."
He laughed but I was only 17 and scared.
I was just in a world of my own still relieving on the rest of the world.
"No worries, you can get off at Sherwbucy." he said
" Who ordered the ticket?" he asked
" My tutor." I said
I tried to work out what must have happened, I thought about it.
A lot of people on the train stared at me as if I was mad as I started to laugh.
Wem please sounds like Wembley.
When got off the train to meet my Mother Shrewbucy, she said.
" I've been waiting half an hour for you at Wem station.
When I told her the reason her feelings were mixed with worrying about me and the funny side of Wem been mistaken for Wembley. 18.8.2011
Your worth the wait.
I feel love for you.
I need your love even more than plants, flowers and trees need the sun and the rain.
This love will never die until I die however long I wait.
If I'm wrong I can be right all the time.
I'd rather miss you than lose you but I can't except your feelings to be the same as mine all the time.
You may leave me some day, then I will have to move on from the light to the day.
If things change for you and me, if ever there's going be another he, he will have to spent more time missing me than kissing me. 18.8.2011
I will never again chase love.
Love will have to come to me if ever again it's to be.
I never looked for you, you found me.
If it doesn't work out for us the next love will be very close friends you and me are or where.
Who knows what the future will be.
Take life day by day.
Don't build one's hopes up: never say never.
Wait and see. 18.8.2011
Open up your mind.
If you feel as if something should be said then say it.
Don't be scared, don't be shy just open your mind.
Some people feels as if they don't want to talk about sad thing but they feel as they need to.
Please give their own time when things are to talk that they want or and need to said mainly when it's sad things.
Some things are hard to talk about but better off not talking about in a lot of people's minds. 19.8.2011
Fits Epilepsy. Why have I not been well for twelve months or so? What's wrong with me? My body is like a moving machine as I get shock in my knees and legs. I start shaking as I get a headache. Fits feel like storms through my head. Water is fusing inside my head. All my muscles go very tense which is caused by stress. My brain gives me a message to my body. I feel and go dizzy through a lack of food and drink. My head is aching as if someone has put a bomb inside it. I have been feeling sick, dizzy, shaky and my head feels heavy. Flashing lights are worse and when the sun gets in my eyes. When opening my eyes it's like my eyes flicker at anything flashing as if I'm going blind. Loud knocking sounds and fire works make me jump out my skin and scars me to death, mainly on Bonfire night. Many different sounds can bring on a fit. Time to lye down, let the fit stop in it's own time as I sleep it off. In the mean time it feels like wires are going through my head. Fuses are blowing everywhere like the wind and the rain coming together the same as thundering and lighting. 26.5.2002 -2.6.2012
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