Disability and Autism.

 I thought I was alone, but I was not.

I thought I was alone, but I was not.

Not knowing what I was saying, doing etc, sounded and seemed to others, whether I was right or wrong.

All I knew was that I didn’t seem or feel right but not really know why.

Not understanding others in each and every way.

Now that I have learned so much about myself, I am also learning to understand others and the fact I am not alone with my disability and mental health, there are others similar to me if not the same as me.

Even though I went to special schools back then I was in my own world.

Now I live to raise awareness of not only of special needs but others who face similar, me and myself for others to understand others for the future to come.

 

The Autism feeling.

What does Autism feeling feel like, what is it supposed to feel?

Who knows? I don’t.

It feels like a world all against you even though, it’s not like that or it is not all like that.

As if you are not for real, even though the world seems normal, even though is not or it is not all.

As if you don’t feel human compared to everyone around me, but really you are human.

Like you are alone, but you are not.

This is mostly what it felt like till I started knowing why I am what I am, even why I am who I am.

Almost as if everyone thought I was crazy and mad.

Yes, I was just a child, surely, I must have known, knowing something was wrong that did not feel right, even though I knew why.

 

Autism world.

Too many people, too many places, not many spaces.

Too busy atmosphere yet too much quietness makes you feel lost.

Too many sounds going off too many devices, a fear you are wanted by someone, even if they want someone else when you do not accept it.

This can be whether you are hoping to hear from someone or not.

This could be emails or massagers, as well or, as video chats such as zoom, facetime, or teams.

Too many crowded people and places as if the whole world is buzzing around you.

 

Special needs

Special needs don’t make us special, special needs is dis, which is difficult.

Ability is our strength.

We are just people like you, the same but different in different ways.

No one is alone we can not be alone, some of us are slower to learn than others, but we are not thick or stupid.  

Autism, Dyspraxia, Dyslexia, etc is part of us, those who face them.

The world just seems bigger to us than it really is.

Motor skills, Coordination, and grip are hidden learning difficulties, Dyspraxia,  no one sees unless they know you or and spend a lot of time with you.

Our needs are invisible to most people because, with special needs, most of us can walk and talk.

It doesn’t should the difficulties or even the strengths in us by just one look.

Not everyone has special needs but there is more than one of us with special needs, no one is alone.