Tuesday, 26 December 2023

Emotional poems

 >Good night sleep


Too hot to sleep so count sheep. 


If you can sleep please dream of me. 


Tomorrow the sun will rise from 

the rain to make a rainbow. 


Red sky at night shepherd's delight. 


Good brave people lose their lives to keep us alive. 


Too much war but hardy any peace in 

the world today. Late 20th century onwards. 



I find it hard to show my love. 


It's so hard to show love to one another

 every night of the week. 


I know we spend too much time together. 


I keep thinking to myself I must walk the

 streets alone but I never do it. 


I do it to be strong to be without you. 


I will have a mobile phone in case you 

want me at any point. 2001 - 2009 







Thinking about you. 


Here I am thinking about you, 

after twelve years together. 


Ok, we slit up for four of those years

 but you were the still the one I loved. 


Alright I met someone else so did you. 


I know I don't show you how I feel but 

I am waiting for you to make the first 

move for love. 2001 onwards. 



Relationships part two. 



When we think of the word relationships

 we think of lovers. 


Relationships are a way of getting

 knowing one another. 


You have relationships with your family

 and friends but not in the same way as your lovers. 


Friends are people who you saw in school, 

work, college out in the pub and etc. 


Families who have raised

 you since birth. 

Late 20th century onwards. 









Blank. 


Do you go blank at a point you can't think? 


Your in a writing mood but 

you don't what to write. 


When you are sitting at home 

for a long time, does your head in. 


You either think too much or not at all. 


Sitting in the house on a 

hot summer's day is a waste of life. 


Take a walk to the library 

out in the fresh air. 


Get some ideas together from different

 books. Late 20th century onwards. 



Goodness knows why. 


Goodness knows why I love you, 

called me mad but I do. 


I would lie if I told you 

I did not love you. 


You know you can be 

romantic if you want to. 


You make me happy. 


You make me sad. 


You make me laugh. 


You make me cry. 


That's what love is goodness why. 


All the time your always on my mind. 


I can't help who I fall in love with. 


That person happens to be you. 


I can't believe I still feel 

the same about you 

after all these years. Late 20th century onwards. 



Time to put things right. 


Don't think I will put the blame on you forever. 


You told me it was the most silly 

mistake you ever made. 


When you left me for her I thought I 

was having a long nightmare. 


You also told me that I drove you away, 

I am so sorry I was not aware that was the case. 


We hurt one another really badly, I 

think it's time to put it 

behind and start again. 


Let's try to enjoy our lives together 

and put the past behind us. 


Life is full of bad and good. 2001 onwards. 







Why do I love you. 


I love your smile and laugh. 


You cheer me up and make me laugh. 


You then make me sad and mad. 


I love you when you get close to me. 


You can make me feel calm when 

I get fed up of this society. 


I love you for what you give me in life. 


I love you for your love and kisses. 


I am here for you if you want me too. 


Like everyone we get our 

good and bad times. 

Late 20th century onwards 






















Forgotten. 


I have a memory but I have forgotten. 


It does not seem to make sense. 


What is your name? 


I forgot, don't tell me. 


I don't want to remember. 


What did you look like? 


It does not matter I think

 I may have had a nightmare. 


Did you kiss me as my 

month poured with blood? 

20th century 


So what, why did 

I ask that question? 


Were we in love? 


No it was just a big mistake. 


Last I heard of you, you were married. 


You ask me to marry you, I told you no 

but good luck to her. 


It was only a dream that we were close. 


I can never even remembered the 

music you listened to. 


It was only a nightmare that I woke up in tears to. 


I have forgotten so much I am so glad

 you went off with her. 2000 



The love of my life. 


I know we need some time apart, I

 am trying to sort things out so I can give you some space. 


The last thing I want is to lose you again. 


I want to be able to miss you so I can put

 my arms around you when I do see you. 


I want to be able to earn a bit more

 money in my pocket so I can give

 you space but finding work is hard. 


College is off for the summer until September. 


May be I am still living in those old fashioned 

ways waiting to see how the man I love feels about me. 


I wonder if we will still love one

 another in twenty years time. 


Will you still be mine? 2001 onwards. 

















It has not been easy. 


Even though we slit up and fall out

 so often we love one another. 


So many times I have cried over you. 


We have so many wishes not hurting one 

another like we have done. 


The loving nights we have had all

 these years together. 


Why can't we bring them back. 


You may not think so but my love gets

 strong all the time for you. 


How we manage to love and hurt 

one another I don't know. 

2001 onwards. 



What does valentines day mean to me? 


When it rains there's no love for me. 


When sun is out I feel as if love is about. 


When there is rain then there is sun love is on then it is off. 


This is how feel on valentines day. Late 20th century onwards. 








I wish I had not. 


Why do I say things that I don't mean? 


How much I wish I had not said what I said to you last night. 


Why did I say I wanted a man to treat me bad? 


May be there's no looking back on what I say to you. 


I will be lucky if you forgive me. 


I don't blame you if you tell me it's too late. 


I should have shown my love for you. 


I'm very lucky if I can show how I feel about you. Late 20th century onwards. 



The next day. 


I can't remember whether I drank or not. 


I must have said a lot of bad things to you last night, I'm so sorry about that. 


I wish last night had not have happened but it did. 


I wish we could stop hurting one another so much as we love one another so much. 


I never know or not whether you are in the mood for love. 


I am frightened in case you feel I am doing what you don't want. 


Whatever mood your in, I know your tired when you finish work. 2001 onwards. 






Sometimes it's hard to forgive. 


Even when you love someone it can be hard to forgive. 


It can even be hard to not to forgive. 


Sometimes it can be hard to love a person again. 


Some people forgive others don't. 


Some people feel love for others, others don't. 


Now I just have a set friends which is good. 2001 onwards. 


I forgive you. 


I forgive you what you did to me years ago. 


Goodness knows why I do! 


I forgive you because I love you. 


May be I have forgiven but I have not forgotten. 


May be I was partly to blame too, I may have driven you away. 


I am trying hard to change so are you. 2001 onwards. 



Never fall in love. 



Never fall in love, once you get into love it's hard to get out of it's like a drug. 


Love can also be hard to want to get out of. 


I have loved so many times, you'd think I'd understand it but I don't. 


When I was younger I thought I understood love: I thought I knew all but I did not. 


Happiness starts then sadness ends until you love the same person again or someone new. 


Love is a never ending story, the same feelings but different reasons for those feelings. 


Very few people last forever. 


Relationship break ups can cause depression and even loneliness. 


Once that depression kicks it's hard to beat it. 


Love is a strange that we can't live with or without. Late 20th century onwards. 



I love poetry. 


I love poetry it helps me get things out of my head. 


I tend to feel a bit bad because poetry is not a lot of people's cup of tea, well it's poetic tree ( poetry). 


It's hard to keep people interested because you can't help what goes on inside your head. 


Poetry is my way of saying I feel good and bad about things. 


I love you poetry you help me get by but bet ween do we interest our readers? Late 20th century onwards. 










My writing helps my relationship. 


My writing helps my relationship, gives me time to think alone. 


All it takes is putting pen to paper and typing it on computer. 


I write about more than just relationships. 


I need a little job to earn enough money to save up for publishers. Late 20th century onwards. 


My only love. 


You may think I don't love you but your wrong. 


You know how I feel about you as well as I do. 


I have known twelve years too long to not love you. 


What am I doing in your life if I don't love you? 


Why do you let me in if you don't love me? 


We are both pains in the backside in our own ways. 


There are times when we get one another down but no one's eyes compares with yours. 


If I could put more into this relationship I would. 


There's so many things I find hard to explain. 2005 to 2006. 




Why do we complain? 


Why do we complain? 


No money and no job. 


To make more friends. 


Never mind who knows what the future brings? 


When we could have been born into a world of no food on the table and no education and work.


We could have been born into dirty places in many cases no places at all but we should know not everyone is lucky. 


Rubbish left in bins. 


Everyone has to live life we can't always avoid it no matter what happens.Late 20th century onwards. 



You are worth my while? 



I have spent so many nights and days missing you and thinking about you but you are worth my while. 

I can't help but liking you in a special way? 

You have been there for me when times are hard time, they still are, I thank you so much even though you situations are hard. 

I have accepted your hard situation from the start. 

May be it's hard for you to believe in me because of what you have been through with other women. 

If you let me I will carrying on taking the situation on board, no matter what the situation is 

I know how you feel I have been there before with men, trusting is a very hard thing. 














I know you like me in a special way too. 



This is a private poem to say what's going through my mind. 

I know special bonds can fail but I am with you as long as you want me. 

You paid interest in me, I wasn't sure at first. 

It was a shock to know that someone was interested in me at that early stage of me having hard time with ex partner. 

It took me a week or two to know that I am interested you after all. 

I was in a bad state of mind at time, which I am still going through a hard time with my ex partner, I don't need anymore stress. 29.6.10 



It came when I wasn't looking? 


I wouldn't have known any different if you hadn't have told me you felt this way towards me. 

If I had liked you in a special way the same as I do without you telling me, I would have took it that you didn't feel the same way, then I would have moved on. 

I wouldn't have told you if you hadn't of told me. 

Was I dreaming, I'm sorry if I was dreaming. 



I have taken everything there is to take on board. 

I will go on taking the situation on board if you will let me. 

I wouldn't go along with it if I wasn't keen on you. 

I wouldn't say things I don't mean if I wasn't keen. 

I don't lie, mess about or change my mind and I stick to my word. 

I don't string men along. 

I understand trust is hard for you so it is for me. 

I'm not perfect is anyone? No! 


I've done my best to not give you any stress so I will carrying on trying to be the same. 

I understand that nothing lasts forever but I'm here as long as you want me. 

If you ever love someone else, I know you will tell me. 

I will move on if I have to. 

I know you won't leave me in the dark wondering what's going if you have anything to tell me. 

I have trusted you with all my heart from the start, I will carry on doing so if you let me. 

29.6.10 



It needs to be time to go now. 


It seems to be a good time to go now. 

You told me last night my friendship and support isn't enough so there's no point me coming down. 

Let's see if you strong enough? 

Who cares if you not, you've only made life hard for yourself. 

What goes around comes around. 

You won't know who you have lost until you have lost me. 

I can't through anymore with you and I don't have loving feelings for you anymore. 

If you don't understand that I will have to go, you blew it yourself. 

I have tried to be your friend but you want more out of that I haven't got the feelings to give anymore. 

Us rowing like this isn't fair on your Mum. 

You always get like this when you have too much to drink. 

Your such hard work whether your drunk or not. 

You row with everyone. 4th July 2010 




















I'm getting away from you. 


I've had enough, I'm getting away from you. 

I think I have just woke up from a long nightmare. 

The shock will come to you one day soon enough. 

The lonely and lost change will come to you. 

I understand what you are going through 

but you have only made things worse for yourself. 

Why should I feel guilty and bad about 

leaving you like you hurt me three years ago 

and many times before that. 


I have made too many chances, no more, 

what do you think about that. 

I have taken you back so many times 

because I loved, I tried been your friend 

but you have now made me hate you. 

After you upset me last night I don't even 

want to see you no more. 

I'm taking no more. 

You never loved me when I loved you, 

now you lie to me saying you love me now I don't love you. 

May be things have turned round,

 I'm not going to change back to 

the soft person I was before. 

You won't walk over me like a

 door mat anymore. 

You have blew it all, 

soon I will be out the door. 


You shouldn't play silly games. 

You will never change you will always be the same. 

I have put up with your silly games for too many years, no more. 

We can't go on forever like this at least I can't. 



Joyful happy love.

I hope forever love.

We went everywhere together.


We should have loved forever.


I don't think he will now love me never.


Joy and peace for life.


Without one another my happiness

 has end so it will never mend.


To be lonely is not me.


To love one another even through 

sadness and shame.


I will love someone one day for the birds 

to sing in the sky in the spring.


I should be able to hear the voice

 of love right over hear.


Sing out about love clear!

1998.








Heart of gold.


A heart of gold is a heart of love.


To be a good woman and good man.


To show your love to one another in the 

best possible way until your dying day.


Eternal love did not last at all.


Eternal love towards engagement and 

marriage forever more. 1989.


Words.


Words that go through your mind.


Words could mean anything at all.


When I am a long words go through my head.


Some words can't wait to be said so they

 have to be written.


Sometimes words don't want to be said.


Some words can be frightened to be said. 

Mid 20th century to 21st century.


I am finding it hard to come to terms 

that you have gone to heaven.


I wish you peace in heaven because

 you did not have any peace on earth.


You were and always be a very 

special Grandmother to me.


It has not been the same since 

you have gone but life goes on.


I know you would not want us to live in

 sadness but in happiness.


My future is my career, 

love and friendship to be.


It does not mean think that the

 family does not think about but

 we understand now you want peace

 from the pain you had. 25.8.2007



To my lovely Nan.


It was such a delight to have you around in my life.


The first memory I can remember of been with you, was when you took me to the caravan in Wales.


Uncle David only drove as far as the Victoria hotel in Wolverhampton, I asked.

" Are we nearly there?"


I am so sorry that I was such hard work for you.


Thank you for looking after me.


Even now I feel as if you are still

 looking after me.


I will treasure you and the memories

 I had with you with love.


You have always been and always 

will be a very special Nan.


Why do I have to let you know how

 I feel when it's too late?


You never know who and what you have

 lost until you have lost them or it.


You are my special Nan because you were there from when I was born.


It was hard to believe 

that one day you would

 have to say good bye,

 now that you have 

I miss you everyday.

You were more than special, 

you were bright.


It's hard to believe that this 

is the first Christmas and your first

 birthday that I won't be seeing you. 25.8.2007






I hope your pain has gone.


I hope your pain has gone now Nan.


I hope heaven is more peaceful

 for you than earth was.


All your friends and family have

 very special thoughts for you.



We all miss you here on earth.


Life is not the same without you Nan.


Nothing more has made me feel sad 

other than knowing that I miss you not being here.


I will never forget you but it's

 time to move on because I know I

 will never see you here like I used to.

As much as I miss you, 

I hope your pain has gone. 25.8.2007


People say I look young.


People say I look young, if I do Nan it's all down to you.


A majority of people say I look like you.


If I do look like you,

 I am the happiest woman 

in the world Nan.


You have always been the best

 Nan in the world and always will.25.8.2007


No one kinder than Nan.


There is no one kinder than you, Nan.


I am so lucky to have such a lovely Nan.


Now that you are at peace, 

there are no words to 

explain how much I miss you.


Thank you for giving me the most 

happiest times of all. 25.8.2007.


Everything will be a crime.


The way the world is going now, 

everything do and say will be a crime.


Even picking ones' 

nose will be a crime, 

it may be a bad thing 

but it should not be a crime.


Once a upon a time, 

yes we had rules but 

we also had a

 three country.


Now it's just non - 

stop rules in the country.


Now there does not seem to 

be any freedom in the country.


The government cuts like a knife.


This sick government is killing us all.


No wonder people like 

Jim Hendrix's killed himself.


Life was bad enough then

 but worse now. 1997 to 2009


Why don't you come down to mine often?


You don't come down to

 mine in the pouring rain.


Come down when the 

sun starts to shine!


Why not make a night 

in my private home?


You can sleep and dream 

until the morning light. 2001 to 2007.



Looking forward not back.


I must look forward not back.


I must not hang around 

looking at the past.


I must stand on my feet not 

where I am not wanted.


I should be just fine to look after 

my new lover and friend in a friendship

 and hopefully relationship 

that will never end. 1997 -2000



I'm frightened to love but

 frightened of losing love.


I am so frightened 

to love again.


I have had so many

 guys that

 have messed

 up my head.


I will be brave one

 day to love again, 

your the only man that 

makes me feel love again.


I have always had 

hope at the back of

 my mind that you will mine.


I can't help the way 

I feel about you, 

I think I am falling 

towards you.


Please don't play on 

the way I feel about

 you because I have 

had too guys who

 have done that before.


Please don't treat me 

like a bouncing 

ball walking

 and out my life

, coming back for more,

because I am human 

like you and 

everyone else are!

I’m not a piece of

 wood like your not,

 even though you

 may think you 

are Mr Hard 

man trying to 

help everyone 

but yourself, 

when don’t anyone 

really not even me.


One day I will see 

you for who you are,

 it will hit you like

 a ton of bricks.

Your bark is bigger 

than your bit.

Once bitten twice shy.

Your not as tough

 as you think you are.

Don’t try to be 

someone you are not.

I won’t put up with

 your messing 

around forever,

 be careful because

 you don’t know 

what you have lost 

until it has gone.


I know I am not

 wonder woman 

but I will do anything 

I can for you.


Can we please slow this relationship down?


We have only known one 

another five minutes.

With any luck we 

might make it. 1997 - 2000



I wish love was forever.


I wish love was forever on 

earth and in heaven.


I was so wrong to think 

love is forever.


I was so wrong to wish 

love is forever.


I must be strong enough to accept 

that love is not forever. 1997



Will you stay with me?


Will you stay with me, then everything 

is mine and yours to share?


Please stay with me, I love you 

more than just a true friend!


All my life I have been 

going round in circles.


Men have driven me 

round the bend.


I need someone to stay 

with me until the end.


Please don't cheat on me like

 many of the others, I have had enough!


He was such a loser going 

off with another woman.


He's off his head, what earth

 does he see in her?


Please don't rush into a 

relationship with me?


So many men have played

 with my feelings. 1997 - 2000



My worries are over.


My worries are over!


What am I thinking about?


I am now with you, 

only you I have to think about.


Stress from my ex lovers

 I have got my anger out.


No more talking about my ex lovers.


Just say hello and good bye 

when they walk passed.


I will close the door

 on bad rubbish.


I have no worries

 no more. 22.8.2000



The way of love.


You can change your mind as many 

times as you change your socks.


You have given me so much 

love yet so much hate.


It would nice to have someone who 

loves me for me, not someone who

 messes my head with dirt and rubbish.


Now I should move on and see what's

 round the condor from me. 1997


Love has been blind.


Love has been blind too

 many times.


Many times for me, love 

has been thrown in the bin.


I thought you were the man of dreams.


You don't love me as I thought you did.


I thought I was lucky enough to have a 

love like you but I was so wrong. 1997



Shep.


Old Shep was a Rough Colly dog 

brought for my sister Holly Wood.


Shep was a very good pet dog.


He was a lot older than the Rough

 Colly we had before, his name was Baz.


Baz was just a baby, we needed 

to calm him down. 2000 onwards.



I can't help the way that I feel.


I am so sorry but I can't help the way 

that I feel about you.


I am sorry that I don't how you feel,

 I wish you could make up your mind 

what you want in life.


I am sorry I don't show my love for you

 but you don't show your love to me.


I am sorry about getting upset so easy, 

you hurt me so I hurt you.


Most of all of I am ashamed

 to be in love with you.


May be it would be better to finish after

, it sounds as if that's what you want. 2007




Where are you going Nan?


I hope you are going 

to a peaceful place Nan.


You may even see the Fairies.


I remember Uncle Chris 

telling me that great Gran 

had gone to live with

 Jesus when I was little, 

I really believed that 

Jesus' house was on earth.


I remember wondering why no one would 

take me to see great gran.


As the years had gone by,

 I learned that she had 

gone to for life.


Now life is too short to 

waist but it will be too 

long to be without you. 2007


Life.


Life can be full of beauty and love.


We must live for the stars above.


Flowers, romance and love.


The night can be dark but the day can be, that is the 

ups and downs of love.


Here comes the morning 

light when things are going good.


Here is the dark nights

 when things go bad.


We see beauty of flowers

 by the sunlight.


The love of a bright red rose 

that becomes far too close.


To forget lost love forever 

more is not always easy to do.


The law of love and beauty.


Now I won't love again 

as I can't love you. 1997.



Happiest is what we want.


To want happiest is to get happiest.


Happiest starts to want inside your mind.


When happiest comes it 

does not always last, 

make the most of that.


Sadness does not last either.


There are so many changes

 in life from happy to sad. 1997.



Poems for the year 1998.


In 1998 to love with faith.


To started a career after love 

falling into a garden gate.


To love someone who 

loves me for me.


To make more friends.


To move on.


To enjoy life and stay 

forever young.


To be strong to ups 

and downs. 1997 - 1998.




















Up to date poem.


Mobile phones


Text messages


Missed calls


Computers


Download


Save to disc


and so the list goes on.2007


This is what you call

 21st century English.


This is the way it must be,

 goodness knows 

in future centuries 

what we won't see. 2007.



May be we are strange.


May be we are strange people

 living in a strange country, full stop.


We can't help the way we are or can we?


We have very strange weather, rain 

and shine in five minutes time.


We are the weather that

 can't make up it's mind.


Now you can't make up your mind.


May be I am as bad, what are we like?


STRANGE!


That does me to say that I am confused 

only because you are but you are confusing me. 2007.



Lucy.


Lucy had her kittens under the kitchen table.


What a black and white fluffy family.


They all had lovely fur. 2007.



Baz.


I remember Rough Colly Baz.


He was a wild running lad.


I used to run along the 

garden with him so fast.2007


Letty.


I use to have a black cat named Letty but 

she had white under her chin.


Her eyes were dark green.


I don't seem to have a memory of 

her attacking me, 

she must have been a very calm pus 

for a young child to play with.


I feel so guilty, I must have pulled

 her tail not understanding that

 I might have hurt her. 2007



Stay forever young.


Never let anything worry you.


Everything will come into place.


Let others help you!


Never let people put on you.


Climb the ladder step by step.


You will get were you want to get in the end.


Everyone will have a true friend in you.


Keep you hands and feet busy.


You will stay forever

 young and complete. 22.8.2000



I hate it when the clocks stop.


I hate it when the 

clocks have to stop

 but they can't

 go on forever.


I never know how long 

it is waiting for the bus.


I never whether I 

have missed the bus.


May be I have not got 

there right on time.


What if I have an appointment, 

will I be late for that?


Well thank goodness for batteries

 but not the clocks going forward and back.


I will worry about the 

right time when it come. 2007



Hot Summer.



I do not mind the hot sunny 

days but not when it gets too hot.


If the weather is too hot 

it does not agree with me.


It's not easy to fall a sleep in the

 hot weather but it can be 

too easy to fall a sleep in the sun.


Don't forget the sun cream!


Let's protect ourselves from getting 

burn but let's go lovely and brown!


Let's cool down with drinking 

water and on our bodies!


I hate the insects that bit us in the 

day and night, they fly

 round in doors by the food.


It's causes such nasty germs.


It's nice to eat outside in the

 summer but not when 

the insects are around.

2007



Spring is here never fear.


Today spring is not spring like 

summer is not summer.


We have four seasons in one day Britain.


It's been a good many years since we

 used to get the straight seasons we used to get.


The good thing about the spring that the

 birds sings and lay their eggs.


The lambs are born to jump around.


Everyone seems happy on 

warm spring days, 

which is very rare today.


I love frogs that jump 

around in the rain. 2007


The four seasons.


Spring


Summer


Autumn


And


Winter.


One


Whole


Year

Of


Days


And


Nights.2007



We should show love for one another.


It's not very often we show love for one another.


When love happens it really happens.


These days our love is so rare, 

I wonder if anything is anymore there.


If you don't love me anymore, 

please just say!


There's plenty fish in the sea I am sure.


If you still love me then let me know 

and show me more otherwise I will be out the door.


I'm a woman, I am frightened of making a

 fool of myself in case you don't have the same feelings as I do.


If you have stopped loving me, then 

I should be ashamed of feeling 

the way I do towards you.

I have no control of how I feel towards you.


I'm just so sorry that I can't do the right thing.


I find it hard to let go of you after all those

 years been on and off with you. 2007



The text message, your are playing games 

with my mind but you don’t no more.


Sorry’ why am I sorry?

I guess, I have been too

 needy over years cause but 

long time no more.

I had loved you all

 these years too much, 

what a fool I have 

been to myself but

 one day I

 know I won’t love

 you at all anymore, 

not that I am.

Now is long the time I 

don’t love you no, 

hate is a strong word 

but I pity you

 messing peoples’

 mind around, 

mainly women 

like I was, 

who fell you once

 or more than once, I’m not 

bothered how you feel 

about that either way.

You were never were bothered

 how I felt about you,

 because you never knew

 how you felt 

about me yourself,

 I do but never used

 to know but I know now.

You have never felt anything 

for me at all, 

it may have mattered to me years 

ago but now anymore 

Why am I 

hoping that 

everything

 is alright 

between us 

when it's not?

You have two 

mobile phones, 

one for 

business and 

one for fun you say.

Every time I 

call the phone, 

I have the number to, 

there is no answer, 

your in the pub.

I must be mad to come and look

 for you in the town, 

each time I go to your Moms 

and your not there, 

how needy is that? 

Very needy.

I should be no need of no mad

If , I hate myself for 

being weak, when I may 

have strength that I 

I have not found in myself yet.

When I call your Mum, 

she knows

 I have  tried to 

called you

  no answer because

 your phone 

is at hers, 

she tells me

 your not there.

This happens a lot, 

not just now 

and then, 

what you up to, 

what you not 

telling me, 

mind you, 

if this is 

the case

 why do

 I care?

Why am

 I bothering 

with you?

Why don't 

you like me,

 saying I 

love you in a 

text message, 

then not wanting 

to know me when

 I see you.

These days

 you only

 pay me 

attention

 when 

your drunk

, it’s the silent

 treatment  

other than that.

Why do you act 

strange 

are you up 

to something?

Why are you 

sending and getting

 texts every 

five minutes?

Why do I feel this way 

about you?

Why can't I just 

walk out on you

 what you are putting

 me through?

Do you want me

 to feel this way 

about you?

All I know is that

 I am so foolish 

still being in 

love with you.

I don't know 

why 

I love you 

but do I? 

Don't you love 

me anymore?

No you don’t, 

you won’t say it so

 I’m saying it for you.

You can’t make 

up your mind 

if you want 

whoever or me, 

you can’t 

have both of us so

 have whoever  

but not me, 

now I have made

 up your mind for

 because you cannot

 make yours,

 you never can

 about 

anything or anyone

 at any time.

You don’t know what

 you want or who.


Just tell me 

if you 

don't love 

me anymore!

I don’t think you 

ever did, you 

just used me for 

what you could get, 

which nothing, 

nothing at all, 

which where you 

say it best, 

the silent 

treatment, 

not when 

don’t 

talk to me 

when I need 

to to you 

cause you a lot 

to hide, 

you dark horse.

Don't mess me 

around in 

and out of a 

text message!

It most likely 

cost too 

much to 

say you don’t 

love me 

in a text but 

you send 

enough 

texts out and 

get many back 

in a short 

amount of time.

Oh I am sorry 

I have said the

 wrong thing yet again.

There's no 

pleasing in you,

 is there?

You know I love

 you so much, 

them you play on it.

I have a good mind

 to send this poem

 to you in a text but I 

don't want to

 encourage us 

to fall

 out again.

Sometimes 

you can be 

such hard 

work 

but as mad 

as it sounds I

 still love you. 

No more chance now, 

I know why 

you’re not telling 

me anything,

 you dark horse.

When you told me last time

 you went off 

with anyone else, 

most people who knew 

you, me and both 

of us knew 

and that scared you.

You may think, I

 am blind by you

 keeping it quiet but, 

I can tell you’re 

up to no good 

by your behavior 

these days.

Once I stop feeling in 

love with you, 

I will be out your life 

for good, in fact 

I should do now,

 the only

 thing is stopping,

 I am just not 

strong enough

 yet but I will be

 one day, once I have 

gone I will be gone

 for good Matey, 

there will 

be no looking

 back or going back.

I’m done with your call 

childish games matey,

 enough is enough.

September 2007 -  23rd December 2023



What will be will be.


Don't ask or hope for anything.


Just stay put.


Don't think about what to 

do or what not to do.


What happens happens.


Come on you have known

 him long enough.


Don't be surprised or shocked 

about anything or anybody.


Why don't you get out

 before it's too late?


Long love is too 

much of a drug.


Why stay where you are if you are 

not loved and wanted?


It's not easy to be strong enough 

when you have been there too long.


Come on you must be strong. September 2007 - May 2009



We parted over a misunderstanding.


You must have known how I felt that 

cold Saturday September evening,

 when my family dug my Nans ashes to the ground.


Thank you very much for your support, 

you dumped me and I thought you 

loved me but I was wrong.


You must have known I was not 

thinking straight when I said what I said.


You must have know

 I did not mean what I said.


I know you will never forgive

 me for what I said.


You must have known that I did 

not mean to hurt you when I was upset myself.


You must have known very

 well that I still love you.


In your eyes there's no going back 

on what I said it's too late for everything.


What not look forward rather

 than going back, start a fresh.


Why do you have to be so sad?


Like I said to you I must accept what

 you want, it should not come as any 

shock or surprise to me. September 2007 - May 2009



May be we can take it slow.



I weep so much when I don't see you,

 I feel so low what you put me.


I am upset over my regret

, I should not 

have said what I said otherwise 

we would have been still together.


It's no good me building my 

hope about anything or anyone.


If you are willing to take it slow 

who knows what the future brings?


Don't hang me on a piece of string!


I feel so much anger inside as if 

someone has put a knife through me, 

I wish you would not do this to me! September 2007 - May 2009


No change.



I hate the cold winter time of the year, 

sleet, hale, snow and rain.

Christmas season costing 

too much again. 2007



On a Autumn's day.


I remember the leaves all over the floor 

as you opened the door.


You would walk through the 

leaves as you when to school.


I remember feeling the leaves under 

my feet as they touched the ground.


The trees blew in the wind from 

side to side as the leaves hit the ground. 2007


How did we get here?


Was living in this unkind life meant to be?


The way the world is going, is it 

worth the world carrying standing?


Society is so wrong to introduce crime to the world.


We all know that there is not any perfect world but it's getting worse.


The way it's going, people won't be able to enjoy life. 2000 - 2003



Freedom.


Today freedom is not a 

word that is promised.


Everyone understands 

Britain's rule's are over the top.


At one time people were free in

 Britain but not anymore.


Now we hear about too much 

killing and shooting on the news.


That's not what you call freedom.


Let's face it folks there's no freedom to be.


It makes us wonder why we are here at all.


There no answer to why we are here

 and why there is a world. 2003 onwards



New year 2003 - 2004.


Thank god Christmas is over, 

it costs too much for one day.


Another year to look forward to.


What's going on is anyone's guess.


I hope this a year for all of us.


I hope there will be peace 

not war for Iraqi.


Life will be easy and hard 

for us all as always.


Life does not stay the same 

otherwise it would be boring.


The hardest part is spending 

too much money for Christmas.


Trying to build money back up again is hard. 31,12.2oo3



Reasons why I wrote poems.


To let you know how much

 I love you.


To let you know how much

 I miss you.


To let you know how much

 I think about you.


To let you know how much more 

I'd like to see of you.


To let you know how lovely it is to 

hear your voice on the telephone.


To let you know that I 

understand your life style.


To let you know that I am not

 trying to make life hard for you.


I love you, I would never say a 

bad word about you. 2000 - 2001



Poems of love.


When you fall in, it's like a bright red rose.


When love ends, the petal of the

 flower dies and falls off everyday.


You move on to make a fresh start.


One kiss brings love back to life.


Yet again love becomes alive.


Is anyone right for anyone?


It's not very often love

 lasts forever these days.


Not many have been as

 lucky as us. 30.12.2003.









I think I have failed your love.


Why did I let you go?


I know there's no looking back.


There's no way of going back.


May be I thought it would not work out bet ween us.


I had no reason to have done what I did.


I don't know what got over me.


May be I thought I stopped loving you.


The truth is that I still do love you but 

what's bad on my part that I love someone else too.


I must make up my mind what I want in life.


I know it's so wrong, I am so sorry

 I have the same feelings for two of you.


I am stuck bet ween the two of you, 

I just don't know what to do.


I don't want to hurt either of you but 

I can't help the way I feel about you both.


I must make up my mind sooner than later.


It's no one's fault but my own. 29.12.2003



The memory of love.


The memory of love gives me 

happiest and joy.


The loneliness of your love gives me 

sadness and sorrow.


When you kissed me

 it was such a joy.


Your passion was like a sudden 

dream that seemed never ending.


Now your not with me anymore, I

 must have had a nightmare.1997



When I look out of my window.


I see the sky going from dull to bright.


I see the sky so dark it turns into a storm.


What strange weather we Brits have.


I don't know if I am right or wrong 

but I am still living in this old fashioned world.


I still need to get used to the new world. 2007



Am I just in your life for company?


You know that I love you.


Do you love me?


Why don't you show me that you love me if you do?


Why are you over me when your drunk?


Do you still love someone from your 

past or do you love someone new?




Have I lost it all I had in my twenties?


May be I am becoming boring as 

I am getting towards forty.


I must have lost it in myself.


May be I don't attract you anymore. 2007 to 2009



It all changes.


The figure has now gone.


Lines are now under my eyes.


I am not as fit as I used to be.


I don't feel good, I feel like a wreck.


Only positive thing is my education and work.


I am trying everything I can to make a

 difference to the lives of people with disabilities.


Don't you know how much I love you?


I know you broke my heart but I forgive you.


It may seem as love is not the same as it used to be 2007 - 2009




Love has been blind all my life.


You may have been heard of but you won't be found.


You had the chance to carry on loving me.


It's now far too late if you want to love me again.


I have took my freedom to love someone better than you.


Now that I have flown my wings 

I hope 

this love will be right for me but 

plenty more fish in the sea if not.


You can huff and puff as much as you like 

but you won't blow my house down.


I missed you when you had gone but not anymore, I

 have moved on. 1996 to 1997.



Long time love.


Me and you will now be 

without one another.


Three years ago we fell apart.


No other man could 

have been for me 

but you, how wrong 

was I to think so?


Your smiles when his face goes red.


Your laughs like the bright yellow sun.


Your brown eyes gives me so much surprise.


What you don't see to begin with you don't know.


After a time you find out that love is blind.


You did not turn out to be the man I was hoping for.


You hurt me so much.


I still love you but you'd hurt me 

again if I go back to you.


I don't know why 

I love you so much.


I only wish I 

knew why I do. 27.5.99



A friend in need is a friend indeed.


If you are help a friend, they 

should help you in return.


If a friend helps you in return, 

which you are a friend in need.


To one another you are 

both friends indeed.


For helping one another as 

true friends indeed. 20.8.99



Loving friendship.


A friendships can be loving.


You can still have loving 

thoughts without been lovers.


Yo can just go with the flow.


Except the excepted 

and the unexpected.


What will be will be.


If it's not to be it won't be.


Keep in touch with

 one another 

but don't make plans 

about the future.


See each other when 

you see each other.


Keep your loving friend like that 

it has more chance of lasting.


A loving friendship may well 

help you forget the past.


A loving friendship may or may 

not help you love one 

day more than just good friends.


Just friendship does not 

mean that they don't love.


Having a the opposite 

who is a true friends to you.


He or she will take care of you.


He or she will share with you.


He or she will talk to you.


He or she will be fair to you.


In return you must do the

 same for them too. 20.8.99



I don't have to be in love with 

you to love you.


I don't have to love you 

because you are a man.


I can love you as a friend.


You don't have to to love me because I am a woman.


You can love me as a friend.


What don't you accept that?


I may well still love you but as a friend.


I am trying not to love you too strong.


You were my longest lover ever, 

why is it too hard for me to accept it?


For you I know I must accept that

 you don't love me. 27.5.99






Knowing what to do.


I fell for you because I thought you had a

 lovely kind caring face.


After two and a half years it seemed 

as you were the man for me.


I still love you even now.


You gave me so much 

happiness at that time.


I never thought you would 

hurt me like you did.


It was almost as if butter would 

not melt in you mouth.


In the end you let me down badly.


You changed all of a sudden.


You were not the man I fell in love with.


I must have fell in love with your twin.


He looks like you but better than you.


I don't think I will meet this nice 

loving man again. 27.5.99



A saying: There's two people in one person: 

good and bad in everyone. 27.5.99



I miss you.


I miss you because you were and still are my hero.


I miss you because you cared about me 

and wonder if you still do.


You have always been in my dreams.


You have always been in my heart.


I have always had a lot of love for you.


You have always been my dream lover and you still are.


I fell in love with someone else

 who really broke my heart.



I would like to forget you as you

 wanted to forget me, 

which is very hard when I am still in love with you.


Your always in my thoughts in 

day and dreams at night. 12 .10.99



I wonder if you regret.


Did you know how much 

you hurt me 

when you finished

 with me?


Did you know how much

 I loved you?


It took me long enough to 

get over two and a half years.


I don't know why I feel

 the same even now.


You went a head without thinking

 about my feelings towards you.


Still it's not all about me. 22.10.99


In my life.


I have cried many tears and many black 

eyes from sleepless nights and stress over you.


In my life my eyes have cried.


One I can say is I have never cried in my life 

as much as I have cried over you.


Now can you see how much I love you? 29.12.99









Please don't change the man I thought I knew.


Please don't change the man I love.


If you have please bring him back how he used to be.


I still love him but what's the point I don't 

think there's any going back now?


Please stay the same whether you love me 

or not because I still love. 29.12.99



Are you happy?


Are you happy with what you have got 

what do you want in life?


Are you feeling unhappy with her and 

wishing that you never hurt me?


How do you know whether

 I'd take you back or not, 

when I don't really know myself?


I was thinking about a loving friendship 

then seeing how it goes from there.


I may not bother taking you back at all.


You have only got yourself to blame with 

what you put me through, leaving me for her. 23.10.99










I will never get him back.


I must accept that I will

 never get him back.


I must have been dreaming 

that I was with him at all.


Was he a real person and 

was he really human?


Did love really happen 

bet ween me and him?


I used to keep on listening 

to him knocking at my door.


One day I knew he was never

 going to come back at all.


The last three years I have 

coped with such pain.


I don't know him and

 I don't his name anymore

 and I don't think I ever did.


He was never there, 

he was just inside my head.


He was just a person in my dreams

 and who I loved so much.


He was the man who said he's not normal.


In the end my dreams just turned 

into nightmares and pain.


Sadly I still miss but was he really 

there in my life in the first place or am I just going completely mad? 1999 -2000






I am here for you.


If you want to give me another chance I am here for you.


If you don't want to give me another chance, I 

don't blame you what I put you through.


If you want a young woman as a loving friend or 

lover I am here for you.


If you want someone to talk to I am here for you.


If you want someone to cry on I am here for you.


However you want me, I am here for you.


If it's everything I am here for you too. 2.1.2000




















Never forget you.


I am like many many other fans who will 

never forget you.


We will never forget the way you entertained 

us when you were singing on the stage.


You made us happy whether we were watching

 or if we were right by the stage.


There may well be over a million people 

who turned to see you.


There all came to see Queen but you Freddie

 Mercury were the main one, you still 

are in our eyes today.


I would have loved to have seen you 

but I was just a child growing up. 2007.



My life has changed for the better.


It only seems like yesterday since you 

left me for another woman.


Thank god she was not a friend of mine.


It does not seem long since I broke down in tears,

 when you hurt after us been together 

for two and a half years.


I really thought it was the end of 

my life when you hurt me.


Now I know that I am stronger 

than what I thought I was.


I am not weak anymore, I

 don't think I ever was.


I would not be here if

 I was weak.


I never thought I'd love 

again but I have.


I never even thought 

I wanted to love again.


I feel stronger than 

ever before. 22.8.2000






I like you.


When I saw you we became good friends.


I am ashamed that I was not a single 

girl when I met you.


For a long while now I have been so unhappy

 on and off because things have not worked out.


Things keep on going wrong getting better again

 too quickly I can't keep up with it all.


I think have depression because one minute I

 can feel down and then I feel up.

I will feel more for seeing you.


At the moment I am not ready for anything heavy.


Would you please accept very close friends?


This will only be until we get to know one 

another then we will see what happens.


I hope something special will 

come bet ween us. 19.3.2000



Looking for love again.


It always seems as if no love works out for me.


When you look nothing seems to ever come.


When you don't look it's here before you look.


It can take so long to have love.


I can't see or feel love today.


I may love tomorrow.


If I don't tomorrow, 

I will love some day. 19.3.2000




Our friend is 

not here anymore.


He went into his bedroom.


Nobody heard him or saw him.


He was found hanging in his wardrobe.


He was a funny guy who made people laugh.


He was a clever man.


He was a young man not even twenty- one.


He had a long life to look forward to but he took his own life.


He had so many things to live for that he did not know about.


He could not cope with the stresses and pains of life.


He did not want to bother anyone with what was 

going through his mind.


He had so many friends who would have listened 

to him including myself.


That's what friends are for. 23.1.2000







I don't want to hurt you.


I love as a very close friend but we can never be more.


I know you want more from me but sorry

 I just don't feel for you in the same way.


I am sorry that I can't give you want in a relationship.


Please understand because I really don't want to hurt you.


You are a lovely guy, there will be someone really 

special to you and you will be very special to her.


Sorry it's not me, I can't bring 

myself to feel that way about you.


What can I do and say to make it up to you?


I hope there is not any hard feelings bet ween us.


I am a loser not you, I have only myself to blame.


Whenever you want to talk to me

 I will always be there for you.


If want to talk private to me

 I will listen to you too,

 I want say a word to anyone.


If do want someone to know something,

 if want me to pass the message on I will do.


I will let you know what they have said.


I will always want to be your friend.


I don't want to lose your friendship.


I can't love you anymore than just friendship.


Please don't except anymore from me!


Don't drive me round the bend! 21.8.99



Sorry I just can't love you the way that you want me to.



I love you as a friend but I don't love 

you in the way you want me to love.



I don't mean anything nasty, it's just 

the way I feel towards you.


I only wish it was not true.


You are a very good friend to me

 and I hope I am to you.


I never stop thinking about you 

as my friend.


I am very happy that you feel the way

 you do about me but I am so sorry 

I don't feel the same way too.


I just can't cope with any relationship 

like I used to. 20.8.2000



I love the wrong man.


I love the wrong man,

 I don't think he is for me.


I am far too good for him

 but he's far too bad for me.


When you love that person you give

 them too many chances in life.


I must be mad to do so, he's hurting

 me so much but love is keeping me there.


No love is not keeping me anywhere anymore,

 if this can't get sorted I have had enough.


The only thing that

weakens me is love.

More pain I have the stronger

 I get but I can't take anymore.

More pain that is given you

 love turns to hate. 23.1.2000



Can't stop thinking about you.


I love you more and more everyday.


I know you don't love me 

anymore but as long 

as you are happy that's all 

what matters.


Life does not feel the same without but 

I have learned to live without you.


In my dreams we have kissed

 you one another.


I woke up and remember that you are

 not with me anymore, 

you are with another girl.


We were holding hands too.


I miss you having you next to me.


I miss us touching one another.


I miss us loving one another.


I think about you every night and day, 

I mist be mad.


You were my first serious love of all.


I have loved you for far too long.


I have got to learn to forget about you,

 which is very hard.


I must move to someone who 

feels the same as I do.


This hard to do when I 

am so in love with you.


I love and miss your company.


You always put the sunshine back into my life.


You gave me so much happiness yet you 

bought me so much sadness.


I have a bad feeling I won't again

 because you won't love me again.


I will miss everything about you,

 no one else will do.


You are in my dreams, 

memory and mind.


To me you are still mine, knowing 

that I can't have you I'd sooner die.


You are on my mind all the time.


Love keeps on pumping round my 

heart and body for you.


I can't believe I am so mad to lose so 

much time and energy on a man like you. 21.2.2000


Truthful person.


Male or female, we are human beings.


None of us go through life without doing some things wrong.


It's not what we wrong as much as hurting others.


What hurts is others telling the truth when it hurts.

We may well still be cross but not as cross when people lie to us.


Whether one is in the right or wrong, it's important to tell the truth.


One of the reasons for the truth is because if you lie too much, 

you may not get believed when you are telling the truth. 10.2.2000







I think I am having a breakdown.


I think I am having a breakdown I can

 feel someone pushing me over the edge.


Oh God help me!


There's no light at the end of the tunnel.


I am cracking up and I 

don't know where to turn.


I feel weak and useless

 for any man at tall.


I don't know where to go for help.


Why is my head telling me I am 

going to have a breakdown?


I can't see what's a head of me.



Is there a voice in my head 

telling me right or wrong?


God help me, I think I am going to die!

Can't eat!

Can't sleep!

I feel weak.


I've been down this road before,

 I will fight it, I will cope again.


I should not go through it again.


I have had a lot of bad luck with lots of men, 

I am still young and strong.


I am not getting any young but life is a fight.


Please tell me what

 hope there is? 21.2.2000





Go to sleep.


You need so much sleep because

 you work all the hours god sends.


When you sleep please dream of me!


When you wake please think of me.


Please tell me what you have been

 dreaming and thinking!


Please tell nice things but the truth

 about what you thought.


Sleep well I'll leave you in peace now.


When I am a sleep I dream about being beside you.


What wishful thinking being with you.


I miss you so much and I look forward to seeing you.


I look forward to your company and your love, 

no matter how much time we have together.

I am so happy to be with you.


Sometimes I don't feel as if I am with you 

because I see so little of you but when I 

am with you I feel as if I am yours.


I also feel as if your are mine.

I hope you feel the same way too. 23.5.2000 - 23.6.2000


Happy life.


What do I call a happy life?


I call a happy with the man I love, which is you my love.


What made me fall in love with you?


There are many nice reasons too but mainly

 because of your handsome smile.


I have found what I want to do in my career and work, 

which is to be a writer of love. 23.6.2000



Happiness.


Look forward to the future it is all out there for you.


You might not see it but it's there to look forward to.


You must wonder what's round the condor for you, 

wait and see no one knows.


Surprises are out there for you. 6.8.2000



Just tell yourself that you have a life out there.


Just tell tell yourself that you have a life out there.


Do what you want that makes you feel good and happy.


Show everyone that you can do better than them.


How your life future is up to you. 6.8.2000









Not all dreams come true.


Follow your head and your heart.


You may or may not get what you want.


Let life and the future happen.


Something or someone may make you happy one day.


It might be someone or something that you never

 excepted or even thought about. 6.8.2000



I think I like you.


I know I only caught an eye of you once.


I liked the look of you.


I was hoping to get round to talking to you

 but it did not happen til now.


I kept hoping I would see you again 

in a way so you and me can talk.


I wondered if you felt the way as I do too.


Please let me know how you feel about me!


If your not interested in me I will accept it.


I hope so I would really like to give it a go.19.3.2000








Your just in dream land.


Your living in dream land.


You are never right on this earth.


Why has it took me all these years to see 

what a boring man you really are?


I must have been blind.


I must have been such a fool.


You live such a boring life doing the same thing every day.


How can you stand her nagging you twenty - 

four hours a day, no way?


Can't you see your trapped under 

her thumb all day long?


If you put up with this forever you are a

 bigger fool than I thought.


You have no chance of getting back with me at all.


I am better off being alone than with you. 25.6.2000



I'll always be there for you if you want me too.



I've done a lot for a lot of guys.


They have thrown it back in my face.


Some guys I have often loved and cared for.


They did not want to know, now I understand 

what losers they are.


Please don't worry I am 

there for you all the way.


Whenever you, I will be there 

for you like I promise to.


Only if you want me to and too.24.5.2000



My life love is silence.


My love life is silence, in my head, 

in my voice and in poetry.


He goes to work on at midnight.


I dream about him every single night.


I miss him every single day.


When I do see him it's such a delight.25.5.2000









Friends to love.


We have had quite a bit to do with one another for a while now.


We have both been hurt by our ex lovers in different ways.


I don't mind being friends with you but in a loving

 way or whichever way you want it makes me happy.


I hope you feel the same towards me too.


I understand that life has been very hard for you,

 it has for me too.


I will do my best to take it easy on you.


I hope you will do the same for me too.


Whatever we decide bet ween us, 

I think the world of you. 9.1.2000.



When I was with you I felt like a woman.


When I was with you I enjoyed your company.


I really did enjoy your love, we had some good times

 and you really made me feel good.


Hugging and dancing to love songs that you used to have.


For some reason when I was with you, I felt like a woman.


I felt like a woman in love, which I was.


Why did I not feel this way before I met you but

 I don't feel this way any more because 

I am not with you any more?


Why did I not feel this way when I lost you?


May be no other man will make me feel like you did. 3.1.2000



Understanding a woman.


You should know me by now.


If you don't know me by now, you don't 

know any woman at all.



By now you must understand what's going on 

inside my mind, I have told you so many times.


Find me a man who thinks like a woman but

 don't find me a woman!


I know us getting back together won't ever happen, 

not over night not ever at all.


Please listen to what I want in life, 

then see if you want the same!


Try to understand how things are and what to except of me,

 may be that is not what you want anymore.


I have had to brave enough to love another man

 with getting over so long been with you.


Please tell that we will always be mates. 3.1.2000



I can live without you if I have to.


If I have got to live without you I will do.


I can take or leave your love.


If I take your love, promise you won't hurt me anymore.


I miss your love very much.


Whatever happens bet ween us both I still love you.


I will take whatever comes my love, I am strong whether you want me or not. 2.1.2000


Are you blind?


Why do you want to know whether I have another man or not?


Why do you want to know whether I am in love or not?


I am not telling you.



I am not stupid, I know you still

 love me the way I love you.


Even if I am not in love, what makes you 

think I will come back to you.


I may love you but can I trust you?


If the right man comes along, I am going for it.


If I were you get back in my life quick before

 another man comes along, well lucky you!


I will only know whose right by whoever comes first.


Don't make life hard for me man.


You have been a naughty man.


I forgive you as a friend.


I can put it behind me now in

 the way you hurt me.


Now not many women can say that

, think yourself a very lucky man.


You are lucky to have a second after 

cheating on me for another woman but 

you will have no more chances.


Cheer up and relax man.

Please don't ever hurt me again,

 that's if I ever will have you back. 2.1.2000



Please be fare to me!


Please make up your mind what you really want from me.


You make out you want me then you do.


Why did you give me a chat up line when he was there?


Why did you storm off at the bus stop when 

I was standing at the bus stop with him?


Why did you tell me to be careful while I was with him?


Why don't tell and show me what you really want?


I know you still feel something for me because you 

seemed up tight when you saw me with him. 2.1.2000






I miss you.


I miss you because you were my first serious lover.


I miss you because we both loved and

 cared about one another.


You are always in my dreams and thought.


You have always been my dream lover but 

I must accept that I will never get you back.


There's still a lot of love inside my heart for you.


I don't think I will ever stop loving you but you

 broke my heart in two when you fell in love with her.


I would like to forget you but that's impossible to do.


I am so sorry I find it so hard to move on.


All the time you are always on my mind day and night.


I am not complaining about romance that does not matter.


I just want the chance of having the man

 I love which is you back.


You don't have to buy me anything, 

you just have to give me back your love. 6.10.1999 - 20.5.2006



My hopeful mysterious lover.


A mysterious a male sent me a 

valentine card and a teddy

 bear on Monday 14th February 2000.


Whoever he is, it does not feel like I will ever know.


What and who could he look like?


Is he handsome enough for me?


Will he be faithful enough for me?


I really hope this card and teddy bear is for me, 

not the young woman next door.


I hope he is not some teenage boy who has a crush on me.


My dream lover is dark brown or black hair.


Blond hair and blue eyes.


Whichever way round, I must take my pick. 14.2.2000





What does it feel like?


When we first met 

I was twenty - one.


I could not see what

 could go wrong.


I have given you the chance 

to be my Dad as you

 are but somehow it does 

not seem as if you.


I thought I could 

forgive and forget.


When I look you in the eye,

 I can't help but

 remember what you put me and 

Mum through all those years ago.


I am sorry Dad, but I have tried to forgive 

and forget.


I can sometimes go blank about the past

 but other times I can't.


Knowing that you were not around in my

 childhood has hurt me too much to forget.


I will still find a way of getting on 

with my life with and without you,

 don't ever think I am scared of that


Still thing could be worse.







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