Old poems

 

MIND BLINDNESS.

In our minds, we can spend our lives feeling 

angry with ourselves.

Some people think we want to hurt their feelings 

because of what we say, what we may not say, 

what we do and what we may not do but we don't.

It's hard for people to understand us unless 

they have Autism themselves.

Don't get us wrong not everything is done by accident,

 we all have faults like everyone.

We make mistakes and regret things like everyone else.

Autism isn't an excuse for anything, 

Autism is our disability, Mind Blindness and 

Unawareness is how it affects our lives.

Autism can affect friendships, relationships, 

even family relationships and 

perhaps the whole world around us.

FEELING GUILTY.

Autism can make us feel guilty.

It's too easy to be unaware of what we do and don't say.

It's too easy to be unaware of what we do and don't do.

What's planned in your mind comes out wrong or and even the wrong way round.

The things come across to people as not good but isn't planned in your mind.

It's not that you don't know right from wrong, what's planned to be one thing is seen as another from most people's point a view. In a sense it's like writing an essay.

Nobody can be blamed for misunderstanding us but we can't be blamed for having Autism.

That doesn't mean we want to be the centre of attention, we just want to be accepted in society the same as everyone.

We just want to be equal to everyone at the end of the day. .

A NEW WORLD FOR PEOPLE WITH DISABILITIES. 

Think about the amount of books we have tried to read 

but the print is too hazy, small or and the stories 

are hard to understand.

Words jump off the page and your eyes start to stain.

We don't mean to make life hard but we have missed 

out on a lot of stories that we didn't understand.

We would like to make these stories more clear to 

understand like easy words and easy pictures for 

the next generation of people with disabilities.

Let's support people with disabilities 

to have equal lives to everyone!

Let's opens new doors!EASY WORLD FOR PEOPLE WITH DISABILITIES.

I love poetry like music, some poems I

 like others I don't.

It's like everything in life really.

One thing though, not a lot of poetry is 

written about people with disabilities,

 why is that?

Can't we communicate in your 

way of thinking?

Let's have a bit of fun!

Easy pictures.

Easy words.

Let's play around with colored paper!

THE HOMELESS YOUNGEST MINDS.

Nobody in my family loves me.

I know I could have been very naughty, 

but there is no need for my family to 

kick me out on the streets.

I am very frightened to go back home, 

but I know my family don't want me.

I know I made a big mistake in thinking I

 could cope to find my own home, 

I just wanted to be an adult far too quickly.

I realize now I was wrong thinking I could cope.

I can't find any food to eat, but bits and piece of bread.

I am sleeping on the hard street floors, but

 some nights I sleep in cardboard boxes.

It's alright this poem isn't about me but how

 many of us stop to think what goes through

 homeless people's minds, mainly at christmas time?

THERE ARE SO MANY LONELY PEOPLE.

In this world we do not realize that there are so many lonely people.

These lonely get out of bed every single morning.

Living a life that seems so dull and boring.

These lonely people do not have family or friends to talk to and see.

When you see the lonely people, they seem more happy than lucky us.

They have such lovely smiles on their faces.

Where these lonely lonely people come from?

What on earth can anyone or "The Happy Society" do for them?

"The Happy Society" used be a social club for people learning disabilities. Roy Holdcoft

used to take us out to pubs, Day trips and holidays but it got too cost too much for him to keep running and us too. We used to raise money. I used to write news letters, my ex boyfriend Anthony used to sell them for 20p. We also had a Jumble sale, which was organized by me but we didn't get a lot out of it.

THIS IS THE REAL WORLD, NOT A DREAM WORLD.

In fairytale stories they say you have to kiss

 a good many ugly frogs to find your handsome Prince.

In my case I believe I have kissed handsome 

princes who have turned into ugly frogs.

Believe me, believe me not, I think my days of

 kissing handsome princes have gone.

Because I fear every handsome prince

 I kiss will turn into an ugly frog.

All the lovely things I used to dream, 

I thought would come true.

Now I am unhappy that everything

 I ever wanted hasn't happened to me

 and no chance will it be.

I blame myself, I fell in love far too young.

Little did I know everything was

 going to turn out wrong.

Now I can't love at all, because

 I am frightened of getting hurt again.

A male and female friendship forever more.

I must keep away from those ugly frogs.

GOOD FRIENDSHIP.

This may be only friendly love, 

but to me it is good enough.

I don't think you need a boyfriend 

and girlfriend to love.

Male and female can still share a 

friendship to love.

My friendship will be here with you for

 however long you want me to be close to you.

I will never go away from you, unless you want me to.

I know we have been through the same thing, 

I know what you are going through.

Trying to move on from the people you love 

or loved is very hard to do, but somehow we must

 get on with our lives and get through.

We must try and see a future for ourselves the

 best way we can, but believe me I do understand 

that is very hard to do but all the same we must get through.

GUILTY AND HIDING FROM THE TRUTH.

Going quiet on people when they talk.

Never caring about people's feelings.

Lying to hide away from the truth, because the truth hurts one.

One is shamed, one is in the wrong.

For one to tell one, but to get someone else to tell one.

I LOVE YOU, DO YOU LOVE ME TOO?

Your hair is blonde, so soft and thick.

Many times I have reached out for your love to tell you.

" Darling I love you so true."

The problem is that you are not with me a lot to say.

" I love you so true too.

Now I have to wait until I see you again.

I love you so true.

I hope and pray to god that you love me to so true too,

 but I think or know you do.

Three little words saying I love you can 

make you feel so special.

So can those three little letters.

Poetry is not where I can spell those three 

little or big words.

LOST LOVE.

There's nothing you can do when you lose the person you love.

All you can do is learn to move on and meet a new love.

When long love is lost it's hard to move on.

No matter how hard it is you must move on.

When short love can come before you look.

It is so important to be loved.

Love can't be made, unless you make it.

When love goes down the drain, it can't always be saved.

For goodness sake you must be brave enough to love again.

Love can cause you so much anger, hurt and pain.

Sometimes it's hard to love again.

Sometimes it's hard to live without love and be lonely.

Without love in many ways, life isn't the same.

I LOVE MY MAN AND HE LOVES ME.

I love my man he loves me.

I care such a lot about him and he cares such a lot about me.

Ups and downs are to come that is part of life to be.

If it's to be it will be, if it's not to be it won't be.

I hope and pray it will be.

Upsets are sure to happen,

 but I hope between us we will do our very

 best to put whatever problem we have right.

He isn't just my lover, he is also my best friend out of all males.

I'm sure and hope that he feels the same way as I do about him.

I hope and pray that we, what future we have to be, 

brings us love, relationship and friendship.

CRYING OUT FOR LOVE.

I must move on again.

Please give me any reason why I shouldn't love

 someone and someone should love me?

Why do I feel as if my days of love and romance

 has gone for me?

Is there something wrong with me?

How can I share love when no one is there

 to share love with?

I can't give love to someone when he isn't 

there to have love from me.

Whoever you may be, if you're faithful, 

kind and good looking please come to me?

I don't mind having serious or play full love, 

as long as someone can give me some kind of love,

 I will be happy to play or stay in whatever way.

Just any kind of passion that comes my way.

I don't mind playing the field or having forever love.

MY LONGEST TRUE LOVE.

My true love once had a heart that gave me so much love.

I had this heart and I really truly enjoyed his love.

Now he doesn't have a heart anymore, because he isn't now my love.

He's now with someone forever and for good.

He's not my true love anymore, but he was my first serious love.

That I will never, ever forget.

I don't think he will find another love like me again.

Hello everybody

 

DRAGON

Watch your ps and qs when you are talking to the dragon.

She may well blow smoke at you and burn you if you 

get on the wrong side of her, she can have 

the Irish dragon inside her.

Don't be put off by her, she has a nice side too.

PEOPLE.

We are all human beings.

We all have different nationalities.

Most people have white skin.

Some people have black skin.

Other people have brown skin.

Some people believe in god others don't.

Some people go to church others don't.

Why don't we just accept each other for the way we all are?

Life is hard enough without making it worse.

Some people have choose to be who they are and what they, 

others don't have any choose at all.

Just because one person is black and the other 

person is white, it doesn't mean they are not alright.

I understand that not everyone gets on but you can't

 take away the way they are or their equal rights.

You have the right to know what people say

 and think about you but

keep your thoughts to yourself, 

just walk away!

Why risk been locked away from the world, 

it's not worth it for anyone.

No need to hurt or kill.

Why take your anger out on people who 

are harmless to you, 

be strong.

Stick to your own 

thoughts in life: 

let others stick to theirs.

PEACE AND LOVE..

We all have to go by the rules of the law.

We are all prisoners of war in our own 

counties wherever we are from.

We are always dreaming of a 

peaceful and lovable world.

Not a greedy or hateful world.

Why do we hurt and kill one another?

Why can't we respect one another for 

being human beings?

Why can't we keep away from one another

 if don't like one another?

Why waist our lives behind bars when there 

are so many good things to see and look forward to?

No world needs to be perfect but why not give 

peaces and love rather than war?

 DULL GREY WEATHER !

Black and grey black country.

Although today the weather changes very 

quickly from hot to cold all over the UK, 

the sky 

in the Black Country changing from

 black to white but very rarely 

blue these days. 

You always miss the black, 

white, dull or grey sky turning to blue, 

I wonder why? 

Today you never see the sky without a cloud. 

Most of the time the weather doesn't tell you the truth.

 Never believe it if the sky is blue in the Black Country, 

that it's warm enough or hot enough outside. 

Never believe it when the sky is grey, black, 

white or 

and dull that the weather is cold. 

Carry your coat or put it in a bag just in case because 

you can go hot and cold in seconds,

 in fact less time than that at times. 

The Black Country started off with smoke 

and coal, now it's turn to thunder and rain 

that has washed out the old coal fires, 

may be a little  sun if we're lucky.

An American consul Elihi Burritt in 

Birmingham 1862, 

once said or wrote about the Black country, 

Black by day and red by night. 

When we think about Elilhi 

having said that Black country saying 

may be he gave the Black Country it's name. 

How Strange an British American could 

have so much truth of describing the Black Country. 

This was because the Black country area had a 

30ft coal seam in the 19th century, this came from West Bromwich, 

Old-bury, Blackheath, Cradley Heath, Old Hill, 

Bliston, Dudley, Tipton, Wednesfield, parts of 

Halesowen and Wedensbury.

HAVING A LEARNING DISABILITY.

This world is confusing and unexplained.

I used to think a lot of negative, 

now I'm learning to think positive.

Most people look at people with learning 

disabilities in a strange way

If you look disabled, some people discriminate you more.

If you don't look disabled, they will not be able to 

understand why you don't understand they, 

I don't realize that you have communicate needs 

but they have too if they don't understand you.

Lack of communicate can be a cause why 

friendships and relationships are so 

hard to have or even keep.

Their needs to be a lot of education from 

people with learning disabilities to main stream 

people understand them or including myself us.

A learning disability could have happened to you.

We're human too, are you?

Many of us have wondered why 

we are here if life is like this.

Why do you make us feel like the odd ones 

out when we have one another who understand each other?

What does it feel like to have a learning disability?

I used to bang my head against a brick wall but not anymore.

Now I put my head up high up to the sky.

I still feel angry, weak and useless to society but 

as I achieve more skills it gets less each and every day.

There comes a point you get fed up of being

 in your own world, you want to help others like yourself.

Now I feel strong enough to help others like me.

I hope you receive more support than what I did, 

I hope life isn't too hard for you.

AN MUSICAL WITHOUT YOU.AND MUSIC WITHOUT YOU.

I would have loved to have come to see you sing.

I only wish I had done now, it's too late.

No one else is you.

Brain, John and Rogar are great too.

Paul Rogars is great but he will be

 Alright Now in Free.

HOPING TO MOVE ON.

Hope is sometimes called wishful thinking.

We shouldn't build our hopes up these days.

Jobs are very hard to find so I am not missing much.

The fact I can't work, I don't know what I want to do

when I go back to college in September.

I have passed some exams which I hope will help me

with my voluntary work at Men-cap.

Where do I go from here?

Where is the light in the tunnel?

The single rose. 

When the wind blows it opens one single rose.

When the rain comes down the whole

 roses are very washed down.

When spring has just started lovers have ran.

When summer is on it's way lovers 

pick roses everyday. September 1997

Lovers.

Eating ice cream on a hot summer's day in the park.

Eating fish and chips, kissing and hugging 

wrapped up warm on a cold winter's night in the dark.

Eating pop corn in the back seat on the back row 

hugging the night away.

Drinking in the pub getting drunk, hugging and 

kissing September 1997

I hope you feel the same as I do.

I am sitting writing poetry about you.

Thinking about you as I do.

You love me like I love you.

Your not only my lover but my best friend.

What happens happens.

I can't except it to happen forever but never say never. 8.9.2002

September.

September is a mouth blowing in the wind.

September can be also warm.

Most Septembers can be cold.

Lovely India summers can happen. 12/9/2002

Molly.

Molly my longest friend.

Can't say she's my oldest friend but best friend.

Twenty to thirty odd years of knowing her since school.

Always be my best friend, we have known one another long enough.

There's no friend like Molly. 8/9/2002

War.

Protecting yourself from gas and smoke with a gas mask.

Bombs going off and going mad.

Boots getting stuck in the mud.

Sore wounds as one moves from place to place.

Hoping and dreaming that the war will be soon over to give love and peace.

Young men and woman been poised by gas.

Worrying about losing loved ones. 7/9/2002

I love you madly.

Hello my lovely laddie, 

I Love you so madly.

I hope you don't leave me so sad.

Why I am I so mad as a lass to 

meet such a lad?

I may as well lose love from start to end.

One way or the other I will manage to be loved again 

and dumped again.

I once ended up with a laddie who went off with another.

We fell in love for two and a half years, 

after that I had so many fears.

It took me a long time to move on, now gladly 

and madly I love another laddie. 1997 - 2000

The voice of homeless people.

I can't cope any longer, I don't have any money to live on.

I keep on feeling sick because I am not eating a lot.

Please save my life!

Please give me a home!

Please me a job and career!

Please give me a normal life like all of you! 1997 - 1998

What has it done to my life?

When I go into a relationship, 

I fall in love too easy.

I know I dream and hope for too 

much for the future.

I should take things day by day.

I need to accept that break ups happens,

 I can't help 

this when I love someone.

When my relationships end I always seem to go

 to pieces because it hurts so much.

It's as if the whole world has crashed on top of me.

Sometimes I have felt as if something 

has been missing in life. 4.7.2000

I live in hope.

I live in hope that I won't you like

 I lost the rest of them.

I live in hope that I will hear your 

voice on the telephone.

There is not time that I don't think 

about you or miss you.

You don't have to fear me, I won't give you a hard time.

I love my freedom and space.

Most of all I love you for you.

The time we spend apart the more I enjoy seeing you.

My fear is losing you but then nothing lasts forever.

I love you so much so much.

I fear because I want to carry with what we have got. 28.8.2000

I'm in love but I have space.

No ties on my life and no strings attracted.

I am still faithful.

I love partner and he loves me.

We can trust each other too. 28.8.2000

I have no fear.

I have no fear of trust.

There's a lot about you that makes me feel as if I can trust you.

I love you for you.

In my mind there's no one like you.

When I am without you, I miss you so much.

Now I am brave enough to cope without you.

It does not matter to me what life is like and how 

hard it is nothing or no one will put me off you.

Please get some sleep while you can with you 

working all night long.

I don't want anything to happen to you.

I'd rather miss you because your working than 

knowing that I am not going to see you again. 28.8.2000 onwards.

In your dreams.

Once a upon a time, I knew you for two and a 

half years which seemed like a life time.

Thinking back you were not knowing.

I know the truth hurts but not as much as you hurt me.

Why has it taken you so long to knew that you 

made a mistake leaving me in the first place?

Well it's only your own loss.

If only you had not hurt me in the first place,

 you know now that you hurt the wrong woman.

Don't ever think if she leaves you that you can come back to me.

You must accept that nothing can be the same again.

Things will get worse for you not better, you would 

either up end living with a nasty old woman or you 

could end up being a lonely old man.

It's far too late now.

If you still love me, please leave me to love a man 

who will love me for me not what he can get out of me.

If you don't love me, why should I be bothered, 

I don't love you either. 25.6.2000

Are you lucky or not?

If you met a nice girl I hope you don't 

hurt her like you hurt me.

I hope you won't hurt her at all.

Who is this unlucky girl who you are 

lucky enough to have?

Is she out there for you?

What is her name?

She is brave enough with you but will she put 

with you as long as I did?

If you are lucky enough please don't let her 

down like you let me down. 25.6.2000

I love you and I know you love me.

I love you and I know you love me.

I have that loving feeling that we are meant to be.

I love your lovely dark hair, those lovely 

brown eyes stick out a mile.

It's so sad I can't see a tiny bit more of you.

I just want to make it clear to you that my 

feelings are very strong towards you.

I hope we are right for one another.

To me you are a love waiting for, I

 hope I am right in thinking that.

You are very special to me.

No other male has made me 

feel like you do. 26.6.2000

You and me.

Ups and downs may well happen time after

 time but good and bad is excepted to be.

At the end of the day we are strong for one another.

There's not a day goes by that we don't 

think of one another. 2000 - 2001

I can't live with or without love.

Why don't I see you, I miss you badly.

Go back to work, I'm only joking.

When I am without you I miss you so much 

as much as it hurts.

When I am with you I can't leave you alone.

Never the less the more I don't 

see the stronger our love is. 2000 - 2001

Flashes of lighting.

The clack of lighting flashing of white sparks.

Rain running and rushing so fast in the middle 

of the night faster than water running out the tap.

Wet hair and clothes. 8.9.2002

W

I had time to heel.

I cried my eyes out that cold winter's night when you left.

It seemed so long I thought it was good.

When you walked back in my life on that 

Hot summer's night that was when I saw the light.

We loved for so long yet we had so long apart.

After you had been gone for so long I 

thought you'd stop loving me for good.

I found myself in the end putting a brave 

face on just to show I

 was strong. 20.1.2002

Nothing stops me.

I am feeling tired and unwell 

but nothing stops me from enjoying life.

Now I accepts the turns I have that is part of my life.

I love studying, working

, writing and being with

 the man I love so much.

I love going out drinking 

every now and then. 20.1.2002

My mind is blank.

My mind is blank.

My eyes are tired but I can't sleep.

I want to write but I don't know what to write.

It's winter time, it's so cold and

 I want you to keep me warm.

I feel lazy to do anything

, please keep me warm. 20.1.2002

Advice in poetry.

Absence makes the heart grow founder.

If you see too much of one another you fall apart.

Longer time a part : longer time together.

Action speaks louder than words.

Never promise what you can't do.

Never say one thing than do another.

Always let someone know if you change your mind.

An apple a day keeps the doctor away.

Eat something healthy everyday.

Eat fruit, meat vegetables or fish.

Have at least a little exercise is the main thing.

What makes a man healthy and wise, as

 long as you keep yourself alive?

As you get older you should get wiser.

Why worry about having not enough money 

when you just have enough to live on?

Why ask for too much when 

some people have nothing at all?

Little bit of what you fancy 

does not do you any harm.

As you make your bed you can lye in it.

If you have a chance in life take it.

Don't play around, one can only stand so much.

You won't be left off the hook forever.

A bird in hand is worth two in the brush.

Be happy with what you have got, you don't need anymore.

One love is enough don't be greedy!

Don't date someone and promise to 

date another at the same time.

You can't always get what you want.

If you learn to live with not getting 

what you want, you will get what you want.

It comes to those who wait.

Early to bed : early to rise.

When you go to bed : you should wake up full of life.

20.1.2002

Lying to rest.

Long lasting love on earth.

May be that kind of love will be in heaven.

Love is here in memory.

Rest in peace.

No arms to hold one tight.

Keep each other warm on the winter nights.

You can get out to cool down in the summer.

Love over heats in summer.

To be brave.

To died for us.

Without you we would not be born. 8.9.2002

How lucky we are.

We have a home to live.

We may have a family.

We may be lucky to education and a job.

We must not depend on families all the while.

We must fly the nest ; our families have bought us up. 29.5.2002

Verse one.

Never leave what you can do.

One reason or another there are people the streets begging for money.

How we tell the people who really need money?

Are some people too lazy to get a job?

Life is what you make it 29.5.2002

Get off the streets!

Get off the streets and find yourself a home, education and a job!

There's no need to be homeless.

Most of you have had normal lives in the past.

Why put your life on hold because you 

have had some disappointment?

If you look forward don't look back.

People will help you if you help them.

Never attention seek just for the sake of it, 

otherwise people will get fed of it if you 

them for money all the while.

No one likes feeling used but no one likes 

being misunderstood, it should not be all one sided.

There's no need to beg for money, wait for 

people to give you, it comes to those who wait.

That way you will gain more friends.

If you keep asking you don't get.

Most people don't have that much money themselves, 

Pthey get fed up of been ask all the while.

If you have an education and job use it!

Help people who need more help.

People who are on the streets for disappointing 

reasons but some people are there to 

make they are because they don't want to work, 

we need to look out for the reasons why most people are. 29.5.2002

Outsiders.

It's cold outside, no bed to keep warm.

Saw logs off the tree, get lighters and matches to light a fire.

Feel hungry so cook food on the fire.

The winter nights are dark and lonely.

You need someone to talk to.

You need a home.

The street floors are hard to sleep on.

You are lucky to get a cardboard box, 

which is as bad as the floors, 

a bed would be better. 29.5.2002

Today is hard for families.

If you have the sense don't have children, 

it's a unkind world out there today.

Life is mostly unkind us without 

been unkind to others.

The future is worry for us let alone them.

If we are not allowed to teach our children 

right from wrong, what's the point?

Leaning did not do us any harm.

Children are lovely but they don't 

know what's right and wrong until they are taught.

How much worse can it get, 

if it's like this today what will it be like tomorrow?

We are just left with a load of crime and 

Anti - social behavior in today's society. 21.4.2002

Today's society.

Never be too kind to people.

They will want off you all the time.

Always turn your head to see who is behind you.

Be careful : never be too careful.

Enjoy your life : you only have one life.

Don't live in fear but always be on your guide. 21.4.2002

Children are not children, they grow up.

Cutting teeth, having colds, growing pains, 

tears, happiness broken hearts, relationships, 

friends 

and lovers letting them down, worrying 

about their safety in today's cruel world 

mainly in society, hoping and wishing 

them to enjoy their live safely.

Are you going to have children?

They are a worry and a heart all their lives and yours.

This makes this society very scary.

It would be lovely to be able to say your only on

 this earth once so make the most of it, it's not 

easy to enjoy yourself today in this 

cruel and unsafe society.

You can never be too careful, life goes on.

Never let it stop you from living a life, 

you'd be locking yourself behind closed doors otherwise.

Children are not children, they grow up too fast.

As soon as you turn round, they have lives of their own.

Make the most of children they are not children for long.

Children grow even faster now than before in this fast world.

Every day, every hour, every mouth 

and every week and every year keeps ticking away from us.

There should be love, care and tenderness.

Never wait until it's too late.

Every child achieves an award in his or her's own way.

Every child gives you ups and downs in their own way.

There should be always something everyday in different ways.

Every human being has a heart of gold in different ways.

When children grow up some built nests

 and become parents themselves.

Sometimes life gets too much, 

families can care for us so much 

it's hard for them to let go. 10 . 12 . 2001

You only have one life.

You only live on this earth once.

Within reason you can do what you want.

You can only get one chance in life so don't blow it!

If you live twice you come back as a different person 

or even an animal.

Make the most of life because it sails so 

fast before you know it.

Try not to do anything to regret in later life.

Never think you can turn back the clock because you can't.

Think very carefully before you do anything.

If you get another chance to take anything again, 

take that chance don't blow it!

Try not to make the same mistake loads of times over.

Your a fool if you don't take a 

chance for anything while you can. 10.12.2001

Find my work when I am dead and gone.

My work is here to read.

What you think of my work is up to you.

If money comes it will go to my family, lovers and friends.

I must take no notice of the press,

 I must write for my readers.

When I am dead and gone, have what you want of mine.

If anyone is interested in my work, you are more than welcome.

I just enjoy putting pen to paper,

 I just help for it to be understood and to make sense.

The words I write on paper come to my mind. 5.12.2001

The days of hard times.

No homes for the poor.

Millions of people living on the streets.

No work to earn money.

People eating food that could and even find.

Millions of people's lives have lived and died 

through been homeless.

Children going down chimneys sweeps to earn money.

Young men breathing the coal mines to earn 

money for their wives and families.

Some things may have got better but 

nothing is completely right. 5.12.2001

Quiet.

Now it's quiet at midnight and I can write.

Millions of people sleeping on the street 

as I write sitting in my home.

The wind is blowing a storm,

 there's nothing quiet about that 

when the people living on the 

street are trying to sleep.

I will just put anything down on 

paper about the storm.

I must turn on my lamb to 

give me the light.

I will sleep until the morning light.

As a student I will study in the day light.

To write on a winter's night is anything

 that comes to mind. 5.12.2001

Stacey from ' THE HAPPY SOCIETY ( she was!)

Stacey was full of life and free to do what she wanted.

Stacey had so many friends and so many people to see.

Stacey shared the same birthday as me 

October 24th, she wrote poetry just like me and she 

had Autism like me.

Every year my birthday comes round I think of Stacey.

The sad thing is that I never saw any of

 her poems and Stacey never any of mine.

I don't know what kind of poems she wrote 

and she did not know what kind of poems 

I write and wrote in the case may.

In my eyes a poet never dies : a poet's work lives on.

Poets who live in heaven look down on you

 while you read their work.

Stacey is still with us even though she's in heaven.

I believe Stacey is watching me write poetry.

There will be plenty of young and new poets

 to be but not like Stacey, 

Stacey is my best friend.

Little do we know how 

short life is until it's gone.

Stacey had so much in common with 

me even though she was and still is 

in my eyes about twelve younger than me.

I am so much older than Stacey was,

 she was only her early 20s.

I am so lucky to reach my 30s.

Stacey had plenty of male and female friends, 

she was friends with you if you were friends with her.

Stacey made you laugh, she made the

 Happy Society the Happy Society.

Everyone looked forward to going to the

 Happy Society when Stacey was there.

Stacey was too young to go to heaven, 

the Happy Society became Sad Society without Stacey.

Why Stacey, why not me she was younger than me?

She went to college in London for her poetry lessons.

Stacey had such a string of 

boyfriends, no one 

could count them. 26.5.2002

Memory to remember.

One hundred English people had been killed 

in the America war.

As you may image that everyone 

was angry and upset.

There was such nasty damage to 

America a lovely country.

Two brothers were aboard hijacked Untied 

175, which crashed in into word trade.

Some people even died pentagon. 12.9.2002

Life one.

I hope you have not got a crush me.

I am very fond of you as a friend.

I don't want us to hurt one another.

You have plenty of time to find happiness, 

you are so young.

You are fifteen years younger than me.

Age may not matter but it's your 

future you need to think about in a grown up manner.

You may not understand what I 

mean because you are so you but you will one day.

I was young like you once, I 

used to have these feeling 

towards people but I got over it.

Love does not always happen 

how you want it to be, we live 

miles apart in life and age.

When you get to my age you

 will know what it's all about.

You will live and learn, 

you never stop learning right from 

wrong through adult life then you 

get older and wiser, 

this works well for most of us anyway. 9.5.2002

Don't get me wrong.

It's very flattering to be fancied

 by someone as lovely as you.

Don't take it the wrong way, I

 am about fifteen years older than you.

I'd get done for going with very young 

boys like you, I know you are nearly a young man.

I am almost a middle age woman even though

 I may look as young as you.

A woman of my age should know better.

You may think that I could teach you a 

few things, believe me you could end up

 teaching me a few things, you will 

learn faster than me through everyday life.

You make mistakes in life then learn from them, 

at least most of us do.

Some of us make the same mistake loads 

of times like I have done so what could I teach you?

I have just had to learn without no 

computers, mobile phones but everyday life.

You have mobile phones, computers, everyday

 live and etc to learn from.

I think will learn better without me,

 I have made too many of own mistakes, 

what do I know if I can't get things right myself?

Without you knowing it, you know more 

about life than I do.

You most likely be teaching me more so 

than I would be teaching you.

It just does not feel right someone 

young teaching someone old.

I have been around far too longer than you, 

I should know more than you but 

that's not always the case. 9.8.2002

Homeless old people.

No one to talk.

No children, no Grand children, 

no Great Grand children.

Far too cold, there needs to be warm.

Nowhere to cool down from the hot 

sun when your near enough passing out.

Not knowing what tomorrow is going to bring. 29.5.2002

We are all together.

Getting together for a drink and a talk.

People finding out from one another 

how they got on the streets in the place.

How are they going a normal life?

How are they going to live through the

 world of the four seasons in one?

Winter cold, snow, rain, sleet, hale and sun.

Autumn cold winds blowing leaves as they change colors

off the trees on to the ground.

Spring is meant to be warm not cold but 

it does not seem to be the case anymore.

There are very few leaves on the trees 

that are green but it happens bit by bit 

until the summer on sun baying hot days.

More green leaves on the trees and a 

lovely garden life homeless people may talk about. 9.5.2002

I am so sorry it can't happen my friend.

I hope I have not lost your friendship.

I hope I have not hurt you.

I still care about you and look out for you.

Your so young and I am old enough to be your Mum.

It would not be fare on either of us if we got together.

I am sure you would get fed of me one day anyway.

One day you will find someone more 

special, I am not special at all only special needs.

I am just too old to look at. 9.5.2002

Memory of Eddie dog.

He was so fluffy.

He was so soft.

He was only nasty if anyone hurt us.

Me and my family were the people who 

knew him and loved him.

He went to another home where he's 

well looked after, we are just too busy 

with our lives to look after him.

He loved to play ball.

He loved to go out for walks.

He loved to run across the park.

He hated been on a lead because he 

was a country and farm dog.

He would pull you around so hard and

 fast when he had his lead on.

He would only attack if he saw strangers.

Eddie, where have you gone?

I understand why you left us, we could 

not give you the happiness you wanted.

We are so sorry to let you down, 

I hope you are happy now.

Never forget us for the happiness we 

gave, we hope we gave some happiness.

We are always thinking about you, 

you are a lovely dog. 25.1.2002 - 12.9.2002

The America war.

It was the day I never forget.

On September 11th 2001, I think everyone

 thought the world was over.

It was 9.00am in UK and 3.00am in 

US time or the other way round.

It hit New York and Washington.

It was a dramatic explosion that hit 

nine people pulled out alive.

A fireman had been on the 38rd floor 

of one of the towers of New York. 12.9.2002

My feelings.

The war of America did not sink into me at first.

When my Father told me on the phone, 

I thought I was hearing things and I thought

 I was having a nightmare.

I put on the news on the television,

 watch those two towers full down

 turned my stomach over just

 watching them and I felt sick.

I found it very hard to write 

anything down at first.

I know there has been bad wars before

 but I would say that's the first one

 I have seen in my life time.

I could not talk, I could not stop 

thinking about it. 12.9.2002

What a mess.

The two towers of New York had gone

 through bombing planes.

They were very tall towers, 

I am sure those towers must 

have took a long time to build.

I feel sorry for whoever it was know 

who worked so hard to build those towers.

There was not just 1000s of lives lost, a 

lot of homes had been broken and smashed. 12.9.2002

What happened?

A fireman had been rolling down

 the stairwell floor by floor.

The whole building collapsed.

Five other fire fighters and police 

officers near enough lost their lives. 12.9.2002

Sometimes hurtful things happen for the best.

Life is here to enjoy but sometimes all 

good things have to come to an end.

You have plenty to look forward to but

 happiness may take it's time to come back.

Sadly we can't get by without making 

mistakes and learning from them 

but how many of us do?

We are only human : no one is perfect.

It may take a long time while we want 

to get but most of us get there in the end.

At least once if not more in our lives 

something will happen what we don't like, 

that's life for everyone.

So long down the line I hope I will 

be right that some disappointing 

things happen for the best.

Most pain can turns into happiness.

I hope you will be glad of my advice one day

, I hope I will be right in some things if I am not right in all.

It will be hard for us to understand 

that I was once your age.

I had strong feelings towards people

 that I have had to learn to accept 

what I wanted was not possible.

When you get as old as me, you will 

understand that disappointing things

 can happen for a good reason.

The reason is you may like me a lot now

 but you may not like me at all in ten years time, 

you could get fed up of looking 

at an old woman like me.

This could save us quite a lot 

of hurt and pain.

You don't need to be tied down to 

someone like me. 20.8.2002

Studying poetry.

I am studying to remind myself how

 I can interest my readers.

Sometimes I can think of a subject 

others times I can't.

I don't except everyone to be interested 

in what I write as long some people are. 8.9.2002

I dream to be a poet.

I dream to be mostly a romantic poet.

I dream to write fiction and non fiction.

I dream to be a poet of all or many subjects.

I dream to write poetry of good and bad in life.

I dream to understand the minds of animals 

and human beings.

I dream to put down what goes through my

 mind from pen onto paper. 8.9.2002

I love the sun, sand and sea.

The hot summer not cold winter.

Not too hot just warm.

Blue sky, blue sea and yellow sand.

That says it all. 8.9.2002

Lovers part two.

Two hearts.

Four arms.

Two lips to kiss. 8.9.2002

What do I see?

In my 30s still young : not getting any younger.

A few lines under my eyes.

Not looking bad but not good either.

Trying to look the best I can.

We all getting older but not younger.

There's no good and bad in getting older only 

wishing we could turn back the clock and do 

things more different than we did but it's good

 going back to things it's too late to do anything about.

Sometimes life gives you another chance 

but other times it does not, it may teach 

many of us to become not just older but wiser. 8.9.2002

The winter.

The snow may look white and pretty 

but it's cold outside.

The evenings become gray and short:

the nights become dark and long.

Dark early mornings that look like night. 8.9.2002

In bet ween the lines. 

In-between the lines we live a 

life that could fit into poetry.

In-between the lines we live a life 

that we could write into stories.

In life things don't happen the same, 

there's could be good and bad in life, 

which makes our writing more interesting. 8.9.2002

The nightingale.

The nightingale the bird of love and romance.

The turtle dove who sings sweet romance songs of love.

The poet's dream is the art of love.

No broken heart : heart of love.

Passion is another way of love. 8.9.2002

The rose of love.

The red rose is the sign of romance.

To hear the song of love.

To dream about romance. 8.9.2002

Love verse.

To love to kiss one another.

To look is not always to touch one another.

To look in to each others eyes to know it 

right or not right in the case may be.

To sleep and dream of happiness.

For each heart to feel love.

To love on a warm sunny 

day under trees.

To cool down in the stream 

on a hot summer's day.

To love in darkness.

To enjoy the body of love.

To get close to make love.

Love is not everything to life.

You don't have to involve 

making love.

The main thing is loving the

 person for them.

You should not get

 just anything

 you want out of them.

Love, freedom and

 trust is important.

I like a man not too cheeky and not too shy.

I like him to talk to.

I don't like a man who thinks he 

knows everything.

Show off, cheat, he tells lies and 

he's too big for his boots those are 

the men I hate.10.12.2001 - 8.9.2002

Future of child.

Coping without a Father.

Mother bringing up a child or children in this unkind world.

To have family and friends to support.

Is a child strong enough to face this 

unkind world of fear and no enjoyment? 8.9.2002

Hope.

From heaven we are looking down to earth.

We make another life in another world work.

We become another person or an animal.

That's if you believe heaven is another world.

Life goes on.

No more crying.

Love again.

Be happy, we only live one. 8.9.2002

Animals.

Do you believe that you will come

 back as an animal?

For most people memories live on.

Do you believe that you come back as a 

human being if your an animal and an 

animal if your human. 8.9.2002

End of war.

Loving arms round the man you love.

No weeping and crying unless

 your love is not alive.

Living at peace and love at last.

The future to think about and 

look forward to.7.9.2002

War verse.

Feeling the future in sin and alone.

Death and live is so cruel.

Blood and burns is what you saw.

It was not all sad times.

Happiness, dancing, sing and having a 

good time to hide the sadness of the war 

away with the hurts and losses of life.

Memories of love.

Tears of the future and past.

The wounded survivors.

Cradle the war babies to sleep.

Feel angry about the war. 8.9.2002

Freedom at last.

Sleep in peace.

What a horror of war.

What a emptiness without love.

Life goes on, it hurts, we will get by.

Lucky for the ones who 

have the men they love. 7.9.2002

Poets.

We are poets.

We see you.

We hear you.

We feel you.

We smell you.

We taste you.

We touch you.

None of these things 

you don't do to us.

Keats, Wordsworth, Thomas, 

Eliot and many more.

They may not be here : 

there work still lives on.

In memory and love, 

they will always 

be here with us. 8.9.2002

Let's let words flow.

If the words rhyme, 

they rhyme.

If the words don't rhyme, 

they don't rhyme.

As long as words make sense 

that's the mail thing. 8.9.2002

Lucky.

Lucky to be alive.

We go through good and bad through life.

Lucky enough not to suffer : 

lucky enough to live through 

whatever happens in life. 8.9.2002

Write to tap words out on computer.

It's very hard to about words to write 

to tap to type on computer.

It can be hard to think about a subject to

 write about without having to research.

You can't always put pen to paper right away : 

sometimes you can.

Sometimes something going into your 

head to put down paper.

Sometimes it comes out wrong : 

other times it comes out right. 8.9.2002

Great Granny.

The Great Granny who loved me so much.

The Great Granny who never thought I could no wrong.

No memory of anything else other 

than her bonny body and bonny smiling face.

She wore those blue turned in glasses 

that she wore in the 1960s.

Why could not she lived a few years

 later so I could remember her?

I would have at least would have 

known her a bit more than I did. 8.9.2002

Coal.

Men going down the coal mines.

In hale dust and dirt.

Young children far too young.

Living on portage, bread and water.

Going to bed early at night and facing 

very early hours of the mornings.

Having been frightened of been 

stuck down the mines.

Young men and young boys risked 

their lives to feed their families, 

many of them did die.

Still they had to do the job 

to keep their families alive.

What a cruel life it was. 8.9.2002

Drinking too much.

Enjoying drinking at the time.

It's fun and alright on the night.

Up and down to the toilet.

Feeling rough the next day.

Ringing work with a bad hang over.

Can't eat and frightened of being sick.

The after affects are not fun not like 

when your drinking at the time. 8.9.2002

Why do I write?

I enjoy writing to put pen to paper.

Any subject that comes to mind.

I hope I interest my readers at the time. 8.9.2002

I want to help people.

I want to help people who are alone.

I want to talk to people who are worse off than me.

Each and everyone of us have problems 

one way or the other : some people 

have problems than others.

Some people are homeless others are not.

I am very lucky, I want help people who

 want to be helped but if I can help.8.9.2002

Help.

Help get the homeless off the streets!

Help to stop the sunshine burning them!

Help to keep them out the cold on cold

 winter's night.8.9.2002

Last chance.

I have given you your last chance to be.

I did not except to be loving you again, 

it just happened because I love you so much.

Your forgiven this once but hurt me 

again no matter how hard it hurt me to let

 you go, I will have to let you go.

How lucky you are to get me back, 

you have taken this chance.

Don't let me don't because there 

will be no going back.

You only live once, you will end up

 a lonely old man if you let me down again.

If you are not careful someone else 

could step into your shoes, 

you don't want that do you?

Whatever came over you to go 

off with her in the first place?

Whatever has got into me to

 go back to you?

The answer is that I love you.

What does it matter what

 happened in the past, 

now we will look to the future.

I look into your eyes, I knew too 

well that we knew each other so well.

Now that I am back in your loving arms, I

 hope that this is where I belong.

I hope you are here with me to stay 

otherwise you can go away.

My heart and mind can only write about 

whether our love is right or wrong.

This is how I feel about you, my love is

 strong enough for you but please be honest 

with me if you can't stay with me.

Sometimes action speaks

 louder than words.

When hurt me you told me how 

you felt at the time about me.

You made it very clear that you

 did not love me anymore.

You were the only man I loved

, I still do.

You locked my heart now you have 

opened it back again.

I have always held the key for you, 

rightly or wrongly I always will but not if 

you hurt me and lock my heart again. 8.9.2002

Lonely.

I am so lonely without you.

I don't know anyone without you.

Just like you I have been put on 

this earth for a reason.

Where do I come from?

Who do I belong to?

Who am I?

Someone talk to me!

Someone help me get through

 this hard life? 29.5.2002

Time goes slow.

Time goes slow when nothing is going on.

Time goes slow when you are waiting for 

something to happen.

Still things to make you happy 

comes to those who wait.

Nothing worth the wait comes quickly.

When you don't want anything to

 happen it happens too quickly.

I wish I could eat and sleep, 

it's taking so long.

I am tossing and turning in bed.

I love you so much, I can't wait to see you, 

it's not long until I do see you but it 

feels like forever as I love you so much.

I don't understand what's wrong with me.

Things to worry me or is it just inside my head?

I just need to wait until I see you tonight. 20.1.2002

Hunting horse.

Hunting horse of the night.

The birds flying at such a height.

The army running out to fright for their

 country and their lives.

Ships sailing on the rough sea on a rough 

windy night not a pretty site.

Hunting for food for children and wives. 8.9.2002

Life two.

Bare winter trees without leaves.

Summer starting and ending so quickly.

No flowers in a glass, just mud.

Loads of snow or no snow 

to make a snowman.

Birds not to be seen, only 

robins singing as they 

fly and flap their wings.

Other birds keep themselves warm 

hiding until the spring.

Children playing in 

the snow passing the 

days away into the 

Christmas holidays.

Christmas bells ringing 

and people 

singing for the white

 Christmas season.

Keep your eyes closed children 

Father Christmas is on his way to

 give your presents on Christmas day. 8.9.2002

Putting on a brave face.

I used to sit with my head in my hands.

I wanted to hide away from the world.

I did not want to hear or seen the world anymore.

I felt like knocking my head on the brick wall.

When I lost the man I loved so much, I found it

 so hard to move on.

When people looked at me, I always thought 

I'd done something wrong. 25.1.2002

The way to live.

Rest

food

breath

warmth

love 8.9.2002

Picking myself up.

I felt as if the whole world was coming down on me.

I never thought I'd get used being with and 

without the one I love.

I never thought he's love me again.

It was hard to love someone else 

after loving him so long.

Deep down I knew I loved him.

He was so lucky to get me back, 

if I did not love him I would not have gone back.

It was hard to put a brave face on.

It's hard to stop loving him. 25.1.2002

You.

You bring me happiness.

You give me love.

You tell me wonderful things 

that I dream about every night.

You give me lovely thoughts to

 think about the day.

Hoping that our future lies together.

I hope our love will grow every day in every way.

To have fun and romance with you is all I want to do. 8.9.2002

Words.

To sound sweet music.

Resting by a warm fire.

Sleep to dream about nice things.

Riding a horse through the water 

on a hot summer's day.

Some dreams come true but others don't.

The cool warm air is so good for you.

In the winter the river is flowing dry 

through the cold, in the summer flows wet again.

Words could mean anything from the heart and mind.

Words can be said or and written down 

without thinking about it most of the time. 8.9.2002

The weather.

The sunshine

The blowing wind

The stars of the night

The voice that egos through the

 wild wind of the night.

Being sheltered under the hut from rain.

The gates blowing back and to from the wind.

No wild wind or rain, it's time to play.

I hear someone calling me.

Day light there's not a star in the sky 

but may be a cloud in the sky.

The shadow is following me.

Who could it be? 8.9.2002

To feel.

I need to feel I am next to you.

I love you.

You are mine to be.

I've known you far too long to stop loving you.

Your face is with me when I don't see you.

I remember you all the time. 8.9.2002

Me.

Sometimes I feel alone.

I don't always feel happy.

This is not over I just don't feel well.

You can't be happy all the time but

 you can't be sad all the time.

I am happy with you. 8.9.2002

Time to sleep.

When it's time to sleep,

 I dream nice things about you.

I don't want a lot of money, just enough for food,

 clothes, etc and to be with you.9.4.2002

The Queen Mother.

Queen Mother of England's Mum, Granny,

 great Granny and friend to us all.

Most of us may not like the Royals, she was

 the mail lady to love in this generation.

She was a very special for us, who worked 

and lived through the two world wars.

In health and wealth, not many of us 

will live as long as she did.

There would not be this world without her.

It's seem strange without her but

 she lived to be a good age 1001.

I hope she will rest in peace.

She has earned her sleep.

She will be missed by us all. 9.4.2002

Children of today.

You can never bring your children

 up how you were bought up, you'd

 be breaking the law.

It's not easy because some children can

 push you over the edge.

What is the world coming to?

World war 3.

There's no respect for any of us. 2002 onwards.

Epilepsy.

If this is not epilepsy again,

 what is it?

Why have I not felt well for

 twelve mouths or so?

What's wrong with me?

My head is aching like someone has

 put a bomb inside it.

I keep getting electric shock, 

storms like water mixing with wires.

I have been feeling sick, dizzy, shaky

 and my head feels heavy.

Flashing lights are worse and

 when the sun gets into my eyes.

When opening my eyes, it's like my

 eyes flicker at anything flashing 

as if I am going blind.

Loud knocks and fire works scar

 the life out me, I jump out my 

skin on Bonfire night. 26.5.2002

My love.

My love is lost completely without you.

My future is nothing without you.

When I lost you it was true,

 I was having a nightmare.

I could never see what

 was going to happen.

I did not know where I 

was going to end up.

I can't get lost again :

 I have found you again.

I needed you more when you were 

not there but still your here now.

How did we find and lose one

 another in the first place?

Now that you are back 

I am very happy again.

How did we met 

to love again?

It just happened, I

 am so glad it did.

I hope you are here to

 stay this time. 26.5.2002

Life three.

It makes you wonder why 

we were ever born.

It makes you wonder why

 there is a world.

Is there a god in this world,

 if so where is he?

He makes people then

 breaks people.

Why does he bother at all?

He just waists his own hard work.

I remember my childhood and teenage

 years as if it was yesterday.

Yesterday has gone, now it's today, it's 

come and gone too quickly.

When I was twenty- three I 

started writing my life story.

It's taken me a long time to 

write one single line.

My memory and mind goes blank

 to know what to write at all.

The future is anyone's guess. 

No one can say who with and how your

 going to spend your old age with. 

We should stop living in dream

 world and let life live and be. 

Thinking that live is always going to be the same, 

we are just failing ourselves hoping for too much. 

Never say never but if you do say never, 

never say never forever. 

It's too easy to think the next person

 is going to be like the last but never think that. 

Forgive if you can but start a fresh 

and forget the past. 

If that forgiveness does not work 

start something fresh and new. 

We all make mistakes but please try not 

to keep making the same mistakes 2000 onwards 

When we first got together. 

When I first looked at

 you I wanted you. 

You knew I wanted you. 

The butterflies flew 

through my stomach. 

How it broke my heart 

when we broke up. 

I missed you so much. 

When I saw you with her our

 love turned to hate. 

Everyone must have thought I was

 mad loving you as much as I did. 

I madly took you back because I

 missed you so much. 2001 

Yesterday was another day. 

Yesterday was another so just forget

 what happened if it was a bad day. 

Today is what counts so dust yourself 

down and start all over again. 

Tomorrow could be good or bad

 so just get through today. 

There are plenty of days to come but 

make the most of the good days because 

they don't last forever. 2000. 

Life alone. 

You are my friend when I get home my table,

 chair, radio, computer and television. 

My sink, cupboards, toaster, fridge, cooker, 

microwave and food. 

Toilet, sink, bath and shower. 

Bed, dressing table, bed side lamp, book, 

clock, television and wardrobe. 2000 onwards 

What would it be like to see nobody? 

It would be a lonely world to

 see nothing and nobody. 

The thing is though that you will 

have nobody to answer you back. 

The bad thing is that there 

will be no one to talk to. 

It's dark when you are alone. 

Sometimes you do more on your own. 

Other times you need help in life. 2000 onwards 

Nobody ever goes away. 

You sleep beside me. 

You move around my bed. 

You keep me strong no matter

 what happens in my life. 

Where would I be without you? 

Just let me think your there

 even if you may not. 

I need to be strong to get through in life. 

You may not be anyone but when I 

don't want people to answer me back you don't. 

You are not anyone, you just my voice be heard. 

I talk to myself, people may think I am mad so what? 

I only talk to myself about the things 

that don't get agreed with. 2000 onwards. 

Life it's self. 

Whatever you have got

 good keep hold of it. 

Take chances that are good that

 you don't very often get. 

Try not to do anything bad that

 you wish you had not. 

Think very carefully before you do anything, 

it may seem good at the time but turnout a

 bad idea in the end. 2000 onwards. 

Old life. 

It's a sad case living on the streets? 

Who are they and how did they 

get there in the first place? 

Why are they on the streets? 

Most people are sitting outside

 shops asking for money. 

Blankets and getting drunk to keep warm. 

Asking for money for food and drink 

outside cafes. 2000 onwards. 

Too much to drink. 

You can't remember a thing. 

You can't remember what you had said or done. 

When people tell you the next day, with 

some people you don't know whether 

they are telling you the truth or not. 

How do you know whether you have good

 friends or not? 2000 onwards. 

The writing office. 

To be able to choose your own hours

 would be a great idea. 

Nice and warm but costly. 

Just work in the quiet. 

Make your own free time and 

see people you know. 

Write poems, stories and study. 

Become self employed. 

Only answer to the publishers. 2000 onwards. 

How you think.

How you drink.

How can you think when you drink? 

How can you think when your drunk,

 it beats me? 

How can you write when you are 

drunk other than feeling drunk? 

You could write about feeling drunk. 

Start work again when you are sober. 

Anyone writing when they are drunk 

can't think, write and walk straight. 

I have a job thinking when I am sober

 let a lone when I am drunk. 2000 onwards. 

How drinking can wreck your life. 

Drinking can wreck your family. 

Drinking can wreck you as a person. 

Drinking can wreck marriages, 

relationship and friendships. 

Drinking can wreck

 jobs and careers. 

May be just have one night in a

 while to get drunk. 2000 onwards. 

Drinking. 

A lot of people like a drink but drinking

 too much is not good for anyone. 

Once in a blue moon have a heavy night out. 

As long as your not drunk every night of the week. 

The effects of drinking is not worth it. 

Bad head, bad leg, being and feeling sick. 

You can pay the price for a long while for being drunk. 

Problems are still there the next day but 

drained away with drink at the time. 2000 onwards. 

It happens. 

When you meet someone

 you could fall in love. 

When you break up one's 

heart breaks another. 

You seem to think the 

person who has hurt 

you has not got any feelings

 at all but that is 

not always a case if there's a 

good reason for the break up. 

Some people feel guilty 

when they hurt people

 if they love them, it just so 

happens it's not always to be. 

The most common reasons

 for ended love 

is that you may not have

 given one another a

 great deal of time to get

 to know one another. 

It's also agreed that 

most people don't 

feel any guilt at all.2000 onwards. 

I am no one special. 

I should think no one

 not even my family 

know how to take me. 

I am not very bright

 but most of the time 

I can think

 of things to write. 

I know I need to be strong enough not 

to care about what people think about me. 2000 onwards. 

Not everyone is lucky enough. 

Not everyone is lucky

 to be famous or 

see themselves famous. 

Being famous is not 

always lucky enough 

because it's not all

 what it cuts out to be. 

These people have a lot

 of money but it 

does not mean they have

 enough time to 

spend it because they spend

 too hours working. 

I can't say I will be

 famous but If I don't 

see my world shown 

to the world then my 

money will go to my family. 

My work is not that 

good I can't see 

myself been famous

 but never say never. 

I say the same about

 my career as I

 do for loving someone,

 never build 

my hopes up but never

 say never. 2000 onwards. 

I love you. 

I love you for you, 

don't you forget I do. 

I would like you to think that

 you love me for me too. 

You should not love a person for

 what you can get out them. 

I will help you if you help me. 

I want you to understand me

 like I understand you. 

I want you to bring me 

up not bring me down. 

I want to find more friends to go out

 with so you can go out with your friends. 

I want to change the kind of person

 I am but it just takes time. 

We must listen to one another. 

We must stop hurting one another. 

2000 onwards 

Life is war. 

Life is war from the

 day you are born. 

All because life is full of problems

 one way or another. 

Money and children 

seem to be the most 

important problems 

to deal with. 

Education, getting work, 

driving and etc. 

Why am I worrying? 

In today's world 

everyone is in the 

same boat part 

from I don't

 have children 

and don't drive. 

Far too much traffic on the roads. 

The world is too dangerous to 

live in for adults as well as children. 

People who have passed 

exams can't get jobs. 

What will be left of us,

 I don't know. 

What it will be in the next 

generation I dread to think. 

I am glad I am not here

 in the next century. 

That we will 

never know. 2000 onwards. 

What do we really want in life? 

There are times we want to just 

get away from Britain. 

Very often there's a reason

 why we can't leave Britain. 

There are times that I know 

I want to make the most of my 

life like we all do. 

You only live once. 2000 onwards. 

I remember. 

I remember Queen the 

2nd's Sliver Jubilee 1977. 

I was just seven and a half years old. 

Jubilee parties were all along the streets, 

it was also shown television. 

So many years later in 1981, 

the Queen's Prince Charlies 

married Lady Dianna. 2000 onwards. 

Does anyone know and understand why we are here? 

Asking what we are doing on this planet 

is a silly question that no one knows the answer to. 

Are we here for a reason or did it just happen? 

May be there is or is not a reason. 

What we do know is that we are born to two

 people male and female. 

Whether we are planned or not is another matter. 

How we are made and is know to all of us. 

How we are born is never 

known unless we are told. 

The kind of people we are normally counts. 

The unanswered questions of why the world 

is here in the first place is a wonder to us all. 2000 onwards. 

Rain I don't like. 

I don't like the cold rain. 

I don't like the cold wind. 

The wind and rain together is even worse. 

The rain at night washes the

 moon and the stars away. 

It's far too wet for the birds to fly. 

I can't wait for the sunshine to rise again. 

We should have very little rain 

when the sun shines. 2000 onwards. 

Not enough hours in the day. 

So much to do but very 

little time to do it. 

So many things that need 

doing that don't get done. 

Life is far too short to waist. 

Life may look like a long 

piece of string 

but it is not long enough 

spread our wings. 

The years have gone long 

before your very eyes. 

If you want something to happen, 

it's up to you to make it happen. 

It does not happen if you do nothing. 

Time goes too slow if you don't do anything 

but too fast if you do. 

When you least except it something happens 

not when your looking for it therefore you do except it. 

Things don't happen the way I said every 

single time but that's how it happens 

most of the time. 2000 onwards. 

Your there. 

There's a bright star in the sky at night. 

That bright star is you up there. 

The stars are good people like you who 

we miss in heaven. 

That includes the full

 and half moon. 

I never understood where 

it all came from. 2000 onwards. 

Keep the clocks running fast. 

The clock runs very slow if you are sitting 

at home staring into space. 

If you have things to do like I do,

 you'd be surprised how quickly time will go. 

I can never understand people

 who won't do anything. 

I do what I can do because there's a limit

 what I can do. 2000 onwards. 

The bus station. 

Britain has a mixed raise. 

Too many people knocking into one another. 

Too much nose, drugs, bad manners and disrespect. 

Britain is living in a depression state, the 

21st century could be the worse of all. 

I am only glad I won't here to

 see the 22nd century. 2000 onwards. 

I know it would be good for

 us to spread our wings. 

Stuck in the same places day after day. 

You just feel as if you are in prison all the while. 

This is all because of very little money 

from the dole on things that are too much money. 

I guess we should be glad for what

 we have got otherwise it's all or nothing. 

The rich are getting richer and 

the poor are getting poorer. 

We are not free in this 

society anyway. 2000 onwards. 

Rain. 

Why worry about the rain when it's

 warm other than being wet. 

You may need to cool down after a hot 

day but the rain can go on 

good many days and nights. 

Why not sing in the rain 

when it's raining anyway? 

If the rain is deep, why not swim, bath, 

shower and wash your hair in it. 

It would be cleaner to have a 

shower and stand up in the rain. 

Don't do a Gena Kelly holding the umbrella 

`SINGING IN THE RAIN. 2000 onwards 

your in heaven. 

I know I can't see you but may be 

there is a place called Heaven. 

May be the trees and clouds cover 

you up so you can't be seen. 

Heaven is your paradise. 

Earth is the place and the truth of mess. 

Let's face facts, the truth hurt's 

but it's what really goes on. 

The good things are either here or there, 

they are most lies, just dreams and 

things that don't really happen. 2000 onwards. 

Friends. 

People say that friends are there for you

 forever but that's never always the case. 

Some people are still there for you others are not. 

I have only had one friendship in school

 that has lasted 30 odd years. 

Most people come and go out of your life. 

Some people don't want to know you at all. 2000 onwards. 

Good friends. 

If you treat your friends with respect you will 

get the same respect back. 

I have had many happy times with my friend 

Molly, we have know one since we were four to six years of age. 

Every now and then we still see one 

another after 30 odd yrs. 

We both talk about the childhood years 

we spend together and how life is today. 

We went to birthday parties together, 

had tea at each other houses after school, 

played games and with our toys together. 2000 onwards. 

My very good friend Stacey. 

My very good friend Stacey, 

you were so good to me. 

I can only wish I could return the 

favor back but it's too late now. 

I only clashed one fag to her, 

she crashed me loads. 

Stacey was such a great laugh. 

She was so kind she bough 

people load of drinks. 2000 onwards. 

No one will replace you. 

When we slit I never felt the same

 when I moved on to love someone else. 

I wanted you back with me. 

I'd been with you far too long to be without you. 

Now I am brave enough to be without

 you because I am used to it. 

I don't love you anymore like I did before. 

That does not mean I want to hurt you, 

I just want to get with my new life. 

Don't change your mind now because 

you wanted me out of your life! Late 1998 - 2001. 

ow times have changed. 

I thought school was bad enough for me, 

until I heard on the news about today's 

children killing the teachers. 

Has it been worth my while? 

I have spent so man night and days missing

 you and thinking about you. 

What have I done wrong other than 

liking you in a very special way? 

If you like me in this way, you'd be honest 

with me and tell me what's going. 

Sorry if I'm making a fuss for no reason. 

lately 

The world is not perfect but what happened

 to learning right from wrong? 

In my school days we had bullies which 

was bad enough but children who murder. 

Today adults can't punish like they used to. 

Where are children finding guns and knives? 

I know it is not all down to children 

but this is why it's become a dangerous 

world or have we just woken 

We up to the real world? 

Yesterday's children played cowboys and

 Indians but we did not grow to murder

, if so very few did like Mary Bell in

 the 1960s. 2000 onwards. 

My long time lover,

Your always on my mind. 

I am always dreaming about you at 

night and thinking about you in the day. 

I am always wishing you are right beside me. 

The engagement ring you put on my finger 

means a lot to me, even though 

you may not love me anymore. 

Please believe that I still love you though. 

We have been together on and off for twelve years. 

We have been through the hard times just like all people. 

May be one day I will have the chance to

 show my love for you again, 

only when I know that you love me. 2006 

Society. 

I am a single person who can't stand 

stopping in at night. 

I see people round the Wolverhampton 

who seem fed of life. 

Life is how it is, there are good and 

bad people everywhere. 

Some people are kind and other

 people are very strange. 

Too many people sitting on streets 

begging for money and cigarettes. 

If they are strangers to you, never give them anything. 

Some people may have had hard times but 

others may just give you hard times. 

You can't tell what people are like

 if you don't know them. 2000 onwards. 

Parents. 

Parents can mess you head up, most 

of them don't mean and other do it in a nice way. 

We must remember that parents are 

human too and they are someone's children too. 

They have childhood histories just like we do. 

With some parents what they went through

 they put on to you but other parents don't do that. 

Many parents stop together too long 

And when they are not getting on. 

Love can be hard to break even 

when there's a lot of hate. 

Not all parents are the same but 

don't bring the next generation! 

We are only human beings we 

can't please our kids all the time. 

That's one of the reasons I 

have not got any kids, 

I would not be good at it and I 

would not please no matter hard I try. 

See the world of freedom. 

Think how many times you can have freedom 

without been tied down. 

To be fare like every human being. 

Today is a dangerous world without

 any punishment by the rules of the law. 

You can't tell who is a good and bad

 parent because no one can put their 

child on the right track without been punished by the law. 

Society is allowing today's children to 

go as wild as they want to. 2000 onwards. 

Time goes by. 

We have been together twelve years on and off. 

Ok, we fell apart and got bad together like fools. 

At the end of the day we love and care for one another. 

People may well think we are mad. 

We may well be wrong for one another but

 love keeps us hanging on together.2006 

Love. 

Love can happen when you don't except it. 

When you look for love you can't find 

but it can come when your not looking. 

Like other part of life,

 love can make you 

feel happy and sad but not 

 always at the same time. 2000 onwards. 

You may see a few of poems are written from my story ' Talking To The Graves.' 

How unkind life is. 

You should not be lying in a coffin, 

in a gravestone and graveyard. 

You should be lying in a 

romance wood with me. 

We should be eating lunch in the 

park on hot summer's day. 

We should not been dead,

as you are I must be too. 

Not that there is much happiness 

in the world today anyway. 

Not that I am dead but I

 don't feel the joys of spring. 

This winter is too cold to 

give happiness. 20.11.2005 

How can I remember, how can I forget? 

Are you just lying looking 

at the lid of your coffin? 

Is it cold, hot, just right or

 don't you feel it in heaven? 

How can I forget seeing your

 face in the newspaper? 

How can I remember you face to face? 

I did not meet you or 

saw you but you saw me. 

May be all this is a dream but you 

still have friends from earth talking to you. 

You were taken from the world 

before I had chance to see

 you as a person, 

let alone getting to 

know you. 20.11.2005 

I wish. 

I wish I could touch your grave, 

then you could come back alive. 

If only you could move again, 

I wonder and who you could be? 

Would you be an animal or a 

human being? Could even be both? 

You could from animal to human 

or the other way round. 

Would really matter as 

long as I see you? 

I will never have

 a chance to see. 

Why did you have to go? 19.11.2005 

Why did you have to go? 

I did not know you. 

I was only dreaming about 

you as my dream ghost. 

You saw me but I did not see 

you until I screamed. 

You because interested in me 

but I did not know you. 

You went to war to save other lives. 

You were far too young to die. 

You had a life a head of you too. 

I know I am so proud of you for saving disabled people. 

You gave up your life for disabled people. 

When your life was taken there's 

was save thank you so much.20.11.2005 

Back to truth I think. 

It's getting closer to Freddie Mercury. 

Put the beautiful flowers on your grave! 

What would you like red roses? 

You always seem full of romance, 

even when you sing your songs. 

It's hard to believe that it's fifteen 

years to day without you. 

You have broken so many 

hearts who miss you. 

They would love to love 

you as well as kiss you. 

Who can blame them? 

You stood out so well. 19.11.2005 

All change. 

It does not seem as if it was a of looking 

at but it was at the time. 

Five pound kept a family during the 

first and second world war. 

Children did not get a lot but they were happy. 

The only sad loss were lives were lost 

of people they knew. 

Bothers, Fathers, Uncles, sons, lovers, 

husbands and friends who were in both world wars. 

Childrens' toys did not cost anything 

at all because they hardy got any toys. 

Hide and seek and many more were games of

 all that children made up themselves. 

Today they get a lot more but anything 

they get is never enough no matter how much. 

It is true when they say to us, "

 You don't know you born." 

We must be thank for what

 we have got. 20.11.2005 

When I write. 

When I write I worry about spelling, 

grammar and whatever else is in English. 

I know there are times that I miss 

words out of sentences due to me dyslexia. 

Out of all that, when I get an idea to

 write something it takes me ages to stop. 

I must get to a stage I don't interest 

people when I get carried away with my writing. 

This is were I feel guilty because I ready

 want to interest my readers. 

I just don't know when to stop when the

 mind get thinking, the pen and 

key board get's writing and typing. 

My fingers tap away and my 

mind get's carried away. 

There are some days I feel sure of 

myself and that I write alright. 

There also days I have nothing 

in my mind at all 2007 - 2008 

Been there and done. 

Nothing surprises me anymore. 

I have fallen down and got back up again. 

I was born with lack of oxygen

 to the brain at birth. 

I spent a lot of time after

 I was born in hospital.

 I was having a lot of fits. 

I was bullied in school and many 

other things went on too. 

My Appendixes popped 

when I was 13 years old. 

I had Throat cancer when 

I was 23 year old. 

I have bad luck with love of 

men that give me pain in the end. 

Haven't we all been through these things? 

Nothing surprises me good and bad anymore, 

I just take whatever life throws at me. 20.11.2005 

Under that lovely smile. 

Under that lovely smile she must have felt lonely, 

even though she had love and marriage. 

It must have been a blow to her when she 

lost her Father at the age of eight. 

It must have a been hard for her husband 

Ted living with a wife who

 had gone through

 something that had affected her so

 much through her childhood. 

She had such a short life with her children. 

Oh Sliver why did you

 not hang on for your 

childrens' sake? 20.11.2005 

Stress on women. 

You are on your own feeling as if 

the whole world is getting at you. 

The good news that no one owns you. 

You don't want to belong to any but yourself 

when life feels it's getting on top of you. 

You have a lot of love to give but you don't 

want to depend on men, well not all the time. 

You either love or you don't. 

Women should be strong 

enough to take what

 happens in life, well 

that's what a lot of 

men seem to think

 anyway, 20.11.2005. 

It's not nice. 

It's not nice when it's

 a foggy night, 

which make the 

nights even darker. 

When it's foggy everywhere

 seems so far away. 

You can't see a sole in the street

 even if there are loads of people. 

Drivers have to drive very

 careful in the dark or night. 

In the fog day looks like night but 

the night looks even darker in the fog. 

Fog makes winter even more colder 

than the snow mainly these days 20.11.2005. 

When I feel close to you. 

I feel close to you when

 I lye close to you. 

You make me feel safe when you

 make me feel happy. 

It would be lovely if you would 

stay a bit longer. 

It would be lovely to stay a little

 longer early lye in together. 

It's great when I open my eyes and 

you are right beside me. 

I have learned to love you too long and 

too much I can't let go, even though you hurt me so. 2007 

To the one I love. 

You are the one I love so much. 

You brighten up my day. 

You make me feel happy but then you make me feel sad. 

You guide me through that dark tunnel that I can't see. 

We have been together so long that we 

share an everyday memory together. 

Today I love more than yesterday, that's 

even more than before. 2007 

How do I know if you love me or not if you

 don't tell me and show me? 

You know I find it hard to stop loving you. 

Can you disbelieve that I love you? 

If that's the case, why am I still in your life?

 (Your the love of my life.) 

You are now say that I don't show love 

towards you but you never 

show love towards me these days. 

Why should I make the first move? 

Why should I try with someone who 

does not love me anymore or who

 does not know what he wants? 

You will have no problem showing 

your love towards me

 because you know I love you. 

If you show me love I will show you love. 

If you don't show me love, 

then I know my answer. 

How long to do you except me to 

be mad enough to want you? 

It's only because I love that

 I am just around you. 

I just want you to let me

 know whether

 you want me to stay or go. 2007. 

I am so hurt. 

I sit back thinking about you everyday, 

wondering if you are faithful to me or not. 

It's going to take a while until I can 

get my trust back in you. 

I love you for you, 

which is everything about you. 

What I don't like is your lies and 

changes of stories that you have told me. 

I can never forget the way you cheated 

on me, you really did hurt me. 

When you are drunk you scar me. 

There are good and bad sides of you

 like in most of his but when your nice 

your really nice or your really nasty. 

You can be very funny and make me laugh,

 handsome and romantic. 

You are very romantic when

 you want to be. 2000 onwards. 

My worse mistake. 

I know I am such a mad fool. 

For some reason I still love you. 

Now that I am thirty I am frightened of

 not loving again. 

May be now I am out of my twenties 

men have gone off me. 

May be I am going to get less

 attractive the older I get. 

Now I have left you I am not rushing

 into anything with anyone. 

Being alone is better than being with a bad man like you. 

You drink far too much on your tablets. 

You go on and off with other woman behind my back. 

You have tried to hit me when you have 

been drunk when no one was there. 

For some reason I still love you but 

I can't put up with you. 9.1.2000 

The way many men should their feelings. 

Many men bottle their feelings 

up inside themselves. 

They make out they don't get upset that

 easy but they really keep their hurt 

and pain to themselves. 

The only time many men cope with 

pain is when they are hospital, 

this could be why men don't give birth. 

The whole truth many men are big babies. 10.2.2000 

I miss you forever more. 

You were the best lover I ever had. 

We were so long together but now so long apart. 

You are always inside my heart. 

Life has not been easy without you but by 

writing poetry helps me accept that we are apart. 

I think about you everyday and

 dream about you every night. 

I must be with you, no one else will do. 

May be I will love again and get on with 

my life but may be I won't love anymore. 2000 onwards. 

I love someone but I hate him too. 

I hate him when he tells lies 

and makes me cry. 

I don't know why I seem to love 

the men who treat bad. 

I dropped him like a ton of bricks because 

I could not take anymore pain. 

When he tells me he loves and cares 

about me, I think it's a lie. 

Why does he hurt and upset me so much? 

I wish he would have told me he's 

seeing another woman or other women. 

I wish I could get this hurt and 

pain off my mind. 10.2.2000 

Lucky. 

I am thankful for everyday. 

I know and accept that life can't be good all the time. 

I am not saying I don't get angry and mad. 

At the end of the day like everyone I have a life to live. 

I am not alone, there are millions of people

 besides me who have problems. 

There are worse people off than me, 

the grass is greener on the other side. 

We must get on with life, the life the world is

 giving us the chance to have. 12.4.2000 

What are you getting up to? 

When you tell me you love me, do

 you tell me the truth or a lie? 

Do you care about me or do you just 

want my company because you can't

 have her whoever she is? 

If you don't love me, why don't you just good bye. 

There are plenty more fish in the sea you know, 

you don't need to lie and cheat on me. 

I feel sad, bitter and very hurt and

 I am not jealous of her whoever she is. 

( Why should I be jealous of her?) 

If you respect me just leave me free to get on

 with my life but don't leave me with all your lies! 

If you have anything to say, why don't you tell me straight away rather than cheating behind my back? 

I can tell by the way you have been acting, 

you have been treating me like a piece of dirt. 10.2.2000 

To clear up what one has done wrong. 

To talk about it and get off one's chest is 

one way of getting it out in the open. 

To be caring about each others' feelings. 

To make up it up in the way they want. 

To tell the truth about what one has done wrong. 10.2.2000 

Living with and without many men. 

Without there would not be love 

then there would not be stress. 

Without many men many women 

would be free but many would be lonely. 

With many men there would give

 many women many tears. 

With many men there would 

be many children. 

Many little boys grow up 

like many men. 

Many little girls grow up 

like many woman. 

Without many men many woman

 would not be ironing. 

On there are some good things woman

 can do without men but also good things 

many of us women can do with many men. 

There are many bad things that happen to 

many women with many men but some good. 

We must really that many women 

treat many men good and bad too. 10.2.2000. 

We are lovers. 

We are lovers to me there's no other. 

I hope you feel the same way too. 

The door may well be closed at the moment

 but it will be open in two weeks. 

Believe me I am home. 

I know it's hard. 

I can't blame you for not trusting. 

Once hurt, it's not easy to trust again. 

Give yourself time to get to know me first. 

Believe me, it's the truth I won't let you down. 

I will close my eyes in the sun and I

 will not stop thinking about you. 26.5.2000 

Keep hold of me, you won't get hurt anymore. 

I don't worry about getting hurt by you. 

You can trust me too, you won't hurt me anymore. 

You are not trapped by me and I am not trapped by you. 

You don't own me, I don't own you. 

Both of us must be careful though. 26.5.2000 

When I am alone with you. 

When I am alone with you, I really feel as if I belong to you. 

When I am on the phone to you, I feel as if I belong to you. 

It's a lovely feeling to be held tight and kissed right through the night. 

You are the only person who has ever made me feel just right. 

When I don't see you every night seems very lonely but I enjoy it when I do. 

I miss you all the while but when I see you it feels worth while. 26.5.2000 

Now I am with you. 

Now I am with you my whole life 

has changed for the better. 

I can put my trust into you. 

I should not have put trust 

in the others before you. 

Even if you are mine, I am 

not trapped so let's take our time. 

That does not mean I will hurt 

you because I won't. 

It means that you can trust me

 not to go off with another man. 

I'd love to feel your love and 

kisses right through the night. 

I can't believe that this has happen to us, I

 miss you so much. 

I understand that you don't get a 

lot of sleep as you work through the night. 

Because I love you I can't accept

 that I don't see a lot of you. 

I can only hope that there's 

hopes for you and me. 

As long as we are together, 

it does not matter what we do. 4.8.2000. 

Hello John 

Hello John, I know you can hear me. 

I keep knocking and calling your name

 out loud enough for you hear me. 

Has anyone told you about me and 

your best mate James together. 

Thank you Junior and Tracey. 

Me and James got together 

after you left us. 

I am able to thank you even though 

I can hear you response. 

When I go to the pubs in the town at night

, I know you will keep me safe from heaven. 

I wish you were here to keep an eye on

 people hurting me while James is at work at night. 

I am sure James can trust you to do that. 

All the same you will still look down

 from heaven to earth to us all. 4.8.2000 

Your not worth it. 

You are just not worth it. 

One day you will need help. 

There will be no one around but your family. 

How can you except me to help and wait 

around for when you left me 

for another woman? 

I am not sad anymore I 

have a new life. 

Sometimes I don't know if I 

want to be your friend or not. 

What I do know is that you are 

going to end up a lonely person with 

sadness and wishing you had 

not left me like you did. 

You will be very lucky if someone 

else puts up with you like I did. 

If you are lucky enough to meet 

someone nice and new please 

don't let me down again 

by letting her down. 

I am not sure I know 

you anymore. 25.6.2000 

What has been missing? 

You make me feel angry because you were 

not around to be my Father from the start of my life. 

That's what's missing out of my life we

 can't change or go back because it's the past. 

I know there are so many people in the world 

who are in the shoes as me if not worse but 

shame on a Father who has missed on 

his children's' childhood. 

As far as relationships go I find it far too 

easy to fall in love not that

 I am looking for a Father figure. 

When relationships end I break down and I go to pieces. 

It can take me a long time to 

see the light at the end of the tunnel. 

It can take me a long to believe in myself

 that things will one day change for the better. 

I am not as strong than I think I am. 

I always think I never move on but I do. 

If I was not writing poetry I would 

not cope with life like I do mainly 

when I go through bad times. 

I know I have always had something 

missing out my life I don't what it is but 

whatever it is it's caused by you. 

May be there is that person who will love 

me for me and make my life complete but 

I have not meet him yet but then again I may not. 

He may or may not be out there. 4.7.2000 

I am sure this love is for me. 

I am sure this love is for me, 

the kindness one to be. 

I will have to wait and see if it's to be. 

I am sure he is the right man for me. 

To me he's the best man I have ever

 known and seen. 

He makes me feel happy and 

he makes me feel warm. 

I can see that he loves and care about so

 much and I do about him too. 

He loves me and protects me. 

We listen to one another. 

Our feelings are towards one another. 23.6.2000 

Love. 

Some people win the luck of love but others don't. 

Most of us get pain and love others get pain and loneliness. 

Who said life is perfect no one can except it to be? 

How boring it would be if life was perfect. 

Hearts get broke and you feel as if you have 

been stabbed with a knife. 

Loneliness can also be a painful thing. 

We must not thing too bad because it may happen to you. 

No one enjoys pain : everyone goes through disappointment. 

Everyone has to keep strong in life. 

No one wants to weak : no wants to get hurt

 that's life One does not go without the other. 

It has to be bad to be good. 20.11.2005 

Not alone. 

Why has it take me years to knew that 

I am not alone in this world? 

Why has it take years to know you are 

the wrong man for me but I love you. 

Why are we living in a slow thinking world. 

I am sorry I was not aware that others 

stuffer broken hearts too. 

It's a closed world for everyone where we

 feel as if we have to keep our thoughts to ourselves. 

I was so wrapped up in my own world. 

I was not really aware of the world around me. 

I did not feel guilty about it until now. 

I am so sorry that I did not see the world like other people do. 20.11.2005 

Time to put it behind me. 

I love you but I will forget them. 

Now that I am with you after all these 

years, please keep me warm for Christmas. 

Now I will love you without fear forever. 

I know we have had plenty of ups and downs: 

plenty of ups and downs to come. 

We must stop hurting one another. 

My love for you is far too strong to walk away. 

Now I can forget about the rest of the men

 who I thought loved me for me. 

I have been with you far too

 long not to love you. 2005 to 2006 

Just to be together. 

Would it not be nice to see the moon

 and stars together just like you and me? 

I'd love to sit by sea to watch 

the tide go in and out. 

I'd love to watch the flowers grow in 

the garden every singe day. 

I don't want to believe that there are 

witches mixing people in soup. 

I want to believe the fairies are in the 

garden but they are not. 2005 - 2006. 

I don't want much. 

I don't want much, I just want you. 

I just want your love. 

I just want you to keep me warm. 

I will give you space after Christmas time. 

I just want to beside you. 

I want to be with you when you want me. 20.11.2005 

Anything you do does not surprise me. 

I have had to get used to the way you 

have always been all these years. 

Nothing seems to be new about you but

 still you can't change a man so I am not 

going to change me either. 

I don't think you have ever known 

what you wanted in all the years I have known you. 

You don't know whether you want to be lovers

, friends or what. 

I just need to achieve what I need to do in life

 like leaving you, which I am not strong enough yet. 

It's no good staying with a man who does not 

know whether he loves me or not. 

I am now a woman getting towards 40, 

I am too old for your silly games and my 

career is coming along at last. 

The young school girl went over twenty years ago, 

I have achieved more through adult life and school

 was no help at all. 

How wrong was I to think

 I would not get by in life. 

If only I knew then what I know now. 

My career is my writing, which is getting. 

By the way make up your mind whether

 you want to be my friend or lover again! 13.1.2009 

The truth hurts. 

Sleeping on the streets rough is no joke,

 there's nothing to do. 

It's no joke when your asking for

 money and a smoke. 

With this credit crunch money wise

 everyone is in the same boat. 

Nothing to eat feeling very weak. 

The days and nights are long and boring. 

No one knows what the future holds, it 

does not seem to be getting any better. 

Many children in care, most of them

 are not with their families. 

There's so much terror in the world in 

each and every way: each and every day. 

The world needs peace and love. 

It's a sad fact that so many people young die 

through a lack of food due to a lack of money 

through the credit crunch and war. 

How much more pain can the world

 take until it breaks? 

They are so brave to stand the strain. 

How can we heel their wounds when 

they cannot heel them on their own? 

Having to cope with little money

 is war on it's own. 2009 

I don't give up on life 

because it's hard. 

Love has killed me inside

 but I am still here. 

Look what you may have done

 to me but I am strong! 

Ribbed my insides out with pain. 

You have made it hard for me to move 

on but I have left you anyway. 

One day you will be sorry 

because there's

 no going back, I have forgiven 

you far too much in the past. 

It's too late for you now

, I can't take no more. 12.6.2009 

I am here for you part two. 

My feelings are mixed up with 

happiness and sadness. 

I also feel a lot of guilt inside me 

wishing I had not let things go too far. 

The kind of feeling that is hard to control is love. 

I understand that times are hard for us

 both at the moment one way or the other. 

I just hope we are here for one another

, I'm here for you I won't be very far. 

I am here for you any time you want me to. 

No matter how long it takes I will be there for you. 

I am here as long and short as you want me to be. 

You said you can't see the light at the end of the tunnel. 

I can't say I will be great help but I 

will be here for you anyway. 12.6.2009 

I have a long way to go but I will get there. 

Here we go again but never will you put me through it. 

The first time you hurt me, I never wanted to love again. 

I thought there was not a light at the end of the tunnel,

 I was wrong. 

There's no going back this time, 

you don't know what you want

 so it's too late if you do. 

I don't think you ever do or did know what you want. 

I have been up this road with you far 

too many times before, there's no reason

 for me to be there anymore. 

I have hung around where I am not

 wanted for far too long. 

I never thought I'd see the day I'd get used 

to you messing me around but I see 

why I have to face it anymore. 

Now it's taught me to believe in myself 

and that I get my life back together again. 

I can't say who I will love in future

 but it won't be you. 12.6.2009. 

You confuse me. 

I left you because you did not know how to feel about me. 

I also left you because I had to stop feeling

 you as you did, 

you were hurting me too much. 

You have completely confused me and used me. 

I need to get over you, which is not easy to do. 

You won't stop me loving again but it won't be you. 

You won't beat me forever, I am too strong for you. 12.6.2009 

Life goes on without you. 

It may well be still dark in here but I believe

 on I am on my way to the light, one day I will get there. 

I will find happiness in some way one day. 

Life goes on without you. 

Your not the only man in the world. 

How foolish was I to chose you. 

I have no shame-to hide from the 

world but shame on you. 

You have bought all this pain and loss yourself. 

Say hello to loneliness. 

I will get through without you somehow. 

I can think more clearer without wondering 

where you are like I used to. 

I know what I want more in life than you do. 

Some people blame you for us but others blame me for us. 

Silly me, I keep forgetting there's no us oh that's good. 

A lot of people have asked about you but I am fed up with. 

At the same time they think I should get

 on with my life as I doing. 

I have not cried a tear over you this

 time but I haven't felt sadness. 

I can live without your love. 13.6.2009 

Open a new door. 

Days are early and nights are young. 

Pain is still but it will pass. 

I'm very willing to move on. 

You feel the same too. 

We don't want to put our pain on one another

 but still willing to get to know one another. 

We must not give one another our

 grief we have had from others. 14.6.2009 

I miss you badly. 

I am missing you badly but I am 

looking forward to the day I do. 

My mind is all over the place bet 

ween happy and sad but I will get through. 

It's wise of you to say that we need to

 get to know one another first. 

Let's not rush into things. 

The past takes far too long to get over. 

I only wish I could cry but I can't. 

At least when I cry it will get out my system. 

May be it's best to write poetry 

to clear my mind instead. 

Cause I like you a lot, I know I was unsure 

at first, change is a new thing. 

I will look forward to a new slow start. 

I find it hard to eat and sleep. 

I can't stop thinking about you. 

I understand that I am not 

on my own, you have 

a past to get over too. 

This is why it's wise not to 

rush into things.14.6.2009 

Whatever life throws at me. 

I must be strong! 

I must be brave! 

I must be calm! 

Heart breaks happen to us all. 

Sara fall down and get back up again! 

For the first time in your life, don't be weak! 12.7.2009 

Feelings. 

I still love you with all my heart. 

When you left me life became rather hard. 

It seems as if my loving feelings for you are there for a life time. 

However you feel for me, how I feel for you stays. 

You are my best caring male friend. 

I mean every word I say. 

I still care and worry about you a lot. 

Please don't think about saying a lot. 

I don't want to come bet 

ween happiness

 now, it's not just about

 what I want is it? 

I must carry to accept

 whatever the future holds. 

I must be happy with

 the life I have got. 

Deep down the 

memories of you 

are not forgotten. 26.2.2000 

Love's young dream. 

I will kiss you until we get together. 

It's time to have time apart. 

We will miss one another when we leave. 

When I see you again I 

will be happy again. Late 20th - Early 21st century. 

Hoping to move on. 

>Hope is a wishful thinking word. 

Thinking can be very hard to do these days. 

No jobs and no college courses until September. 

It seems ages now wait for exam results 

but it won't be long now I hope. 

Why do people go from education 

when jobs are so hard to find? 

Where's the light at the end of the tunnel? 

There just does not seem to be any spaces 

for any jobs mainly with a lot of

 companies closing down. Late 20th century onwards. 

Your history. 

You cheated on me. 

You lied to me. 

I finished with you because I would not 

put up with you for the rest of my life. 

I need one big help to get over you. 

It just takes pen and paper to get my 

anger and pain out then we are through. 

I don't need to lay, your not worth 

it, it's true. Late 20th century onwards. 

Sorry I am here. 

I am sorry I am here. 

I am sorry I was born. 

Sorry for the grief I have caused the world. 

I did not mean to cause hard work to you all. 

Do I have any good in me at all? 

I am a human being I make mistakes just all of you. 

I am a disabled person society seems

 to put me down for making mistakes all the time. 

Life does not seem to be worth living

 or dyeing if it's like that. 

If that's the case why are we here? 

Late 20th century onwards. 

There's only so low you can go. 

We all accept that life can't be good 

to us all the time. 

We know that there's no need to break

 down at the most little things. 

There's only so low you can go. 

Running and hiding is not going to change 

a thing but grief is another thing. 

There's more than one person who has

 to cope with sadness, anger and pain. 

It's more how we react

 to whatever we

 are going through. Late 20th century onwards. 

You find it hard to believe. 

You find it to believe that I still love you. 

If I don't love you what am I still doing in your life? 

You are still the love of my life. 

If anyone loves you so much it's me. 

Who will love you as long as I have done? 

Who knows what the future brings? 

If our love does not last a life time

 I may not love again.Late 20th century onwards. 

Let's have a quiet night! 

Let's stop in together, your place or mine? 

Let's not see a sole. 

Let's enjoy love and passion in our own way! 

Sooner or later the dark nights are drawing in. 

Put the heating on as both of us hug together. 

Why not warm up like toast until we roast. 

Today we have lost our old fashioned

 ways with the coal and electric fires doing

 home made toast on the forks on the fires. 

Late 20th century onwards.