1996 to 2016 poetry part 10.

Happy New Year 2014.

New Year yet I am well behind in my poetry.

Christmas and New Year has come and gone like a book that's opened and closed.

Nothing seems to change yet time never stands still this life.

As the year ends it's another chapter in your life that doesn't always change at that time.

A new year and a year old to come then a new year becomes an older, closes then there's a new year again until the day we died.

It's so unknown why we are born as we are going to die.

When? Is a question of time? 1.1.2014

You make me feel.

When I speak to you on the phone and face to face, you make me feel so special, you just have something that no one has and had.

You bring butterflies in my stomach.

You fill my mind with far too many loving thoughts.

You wouldn't believe how much in 2014, I want to see a little more of you than I did in 2013.

It's almost a year since I started chatting to you on the disabled dating site, nearly year my dear.

Nothing this life runs without any fears my dear.

Let's hope with you I will see my life and the world more clearly my dear.

My mind never stops thinking and wondering when I will see you again but whenever it is you’re worth the wait.

I know when each of our dates have been over when you go back on the train, my eyes fill up with tears of water flowing like the sea.

This is what you do to me, I miss you so much but if we wait long enough the time will be right in time.

This is how you make me feel; to me you are worth waiting for. 2.1.2014

Good 2013. 

I don't think anyone believed at the time that I wasn't looking for love.

One thing I never said that I was just feeling very low at that time but that wasn't the reason I ended up falling in love.

I started chatting to you on the dating site but to start with I saw you as friend then my feelings became strong.

OK, I went on the disabled dating site online, In the first place I wanted to chat to be people but I will honest at that time love was the last thing on my mind.

I spoke to a few people before you; I have to say that they weren't my kind of friends never mind my kind of lovers.

With what I had gone through before you, love was the last thing on my mind until at least a month after I started chatting to you.

As time went on my feelings started to get stronger towards you just after our second date in May, I have never looked back since. 2.1.2014

2013.

We had a fair mouth of summer last year we can only hope for the same if not this summer in 2014.

It was quite a change around after the complete wash out of rain summer 2012.

Therefore I was excepting a very early heavy winter the end of 2013, when I guess it's yet to come the start of 2014.

How strange we don't get a white Christmas very often now, which mostly happened long before the 2000s.

The 2000s have been full of fireworks and storms with so much rain it's been hard to keep the fire burning to keep warm.

No wonder we are depending on cent-re heating and the bills are running high. 2.1.2014

Last day of 2013.

I can only be honest that I haven't had a bad year that year.

Life is ups and downs for everyone not just you and me.

In my mind I had a good year thanks to you and my career.

Hopefully now its 2014 things can only get better.

Before I met you I was never really lucky in love, although I thought I was.

Feelings can make you hope and except too much which is hard not to do when you’re in love.

The last day of 2013 seemed hard to close the chapter or the book but I can only hope 2014 is even better.

Like everything for everything life is full of ups.

Life is full of downs, sad, ups and happy.

Ok things are getting harder and the world is going mad but life goes on until we die. 2.1.2014

The way I feel about you.

Love is you and me.

You and I loving each other is the main thing that counts.

The best thing about each other is both of us.

No strings attached we don't run or control one another's lives.

We are our own people we are ourselves.

We love each other at the end of the day in each and every way.

When I spoke to you for the first time I saw you as a very good friend I never thought you'd become my lover.

Many people thought I was looking for love on the disabled dating, to start with what I had been through before I met you love didn't cross my mind.

The more I was talking to you online the more my feelings were growing stronger towards you.

Now the stronger I feel I don't want to lose your love.

I love your personality sense of humor but most of all I love you.

If only we could love each other more to keep each other warm. 21.2.2014

We need to get to know each other more.

We need to get to know each more.

We need to start dating more; my feelings like yours are getting stronger and stronger.

It's surprising just by chatting online a lot that we can create just a bond together that's so strong by talking on the phone, online and text.

Despite of living so far apart we still need to find a way of seeing each other not only to get to know one another but by having a loving contact together.

You have given happiness even in that little time we have spent together to love one another.

It's good to hold onto who we have who are each other.

I have learned in the end that no love has been worth it if they break your heart you haven't hurt me so far. 22.2.2014

I thought I had nothing and everything.
I thought I had nothing and everything before I knew you.
Despite I don't see a lot of you my life have changed for the better since I have met you.
Now you have become my work.
The only thing I miss is us holding one another.
I will travel miles to see you to love you.
I wasn't looking for love when we met on the Disabled dating site I thought I'd be just making friends with people.
As we got chatting our bond got closer and closer.

Our feelings got stronger and stronger.
Happiness of love helps sadness of ups and downs of life.
A lot of men are never happy with whom they have got but they become twice as sad when that love has gone. 22.2.2014

Love is.

We all think we know what love but then we don't unless we grow old together.
We all think we are in love; we are not unless we can handy eat and sleep.
Yet we can still dream even though we are not a sleep.
Life goes on with or without love.
There's no love without you.
I love you for you.
As we carried on chatting online my bond towards you got stronger.
To me you're so special.
You're always in my heart.
Life still carries on whether you there or not.
You are the purpose of my life.
Soon we will be in each other's arms. 23.2.2014

My love was blind.

My love was once blind.

Everyone could see in him what I couldn't see.

I must have been out of my mind as well as blind not to se see.

I must have seen years of dark then came the light.

I realized he wasn't the man I thought, why did it take me so long?

He wasn't love I hoped; I only dream t he was no love at all.

It took me so long to see that he wasn't love for me to be.

It may have taken me so long but at least I realized some day.

Better to realize some day than not at all.

Now thank goodness I don't feel a thing for this man who hurt me anymore. 23.2.2014

I was woken by the wind.

I was woken by the singing wild wind.
The rain and the wind seem like a big thing.
This has seemed to be heavy which such a pain on the window pane is.
The snow snowed with rain but didn't stick.
Hot summers have long gone.

Long cold winters yet to come.

The weather has a mind of us own just like we human beings.
Very few if not any stars in the sky like it used to be.
There are most things so unknown that so many questions are never ever answered in this life. 23.12014

I thought this was the beginning of the end.

I let it

walked away a long time before I did but my feelings were far too strong to walk away altogether.
In time I knew I'd walk away one day then I did, I just never thought I could.
It was only my feelings keeping me where I was.
It was my feelings that made me give him chance after chance.
He knew how much I loved him, he thought he could walk in out my life as much as he wanted to but he was wrong.
When he hurt me again I couldn't cope anymore.
When I didn't feel anything anymore couldn't cope because he didn't have me to love and hurt again.
In fact in my mind now he didn't love me at all he just played games with my mind. 24.2.2014

There's no perfect life.

Little time we have together we make most of every moment we have got when we do.
You’re far too special to me to not have you in my life.
Now you have become more than friend you are my lover.
Thanks to you babe I am happier than I have ever been.
You have changed my world.
Now matter how hard we try, there's no perfect life.
Good days, bad days, happy days, sad days, angrily and laughing days.

Meaning of poetry.

Meaning of poetry is words.
Most people see poetry as boring cause a lot of words are truth of very often not what most people want to hear.
Not necessary the truth is boring when there are things most people want to hear.
We can talk forever.
We can think forever.
We can write forever.
We can read forever.
Whether or not a poet's work is boring it's down to the poet not to be boring so the reader is interested but then it depends what the reader is interested in.
The truth is down on paper from the poet's mind and down to the reader's taste of lines in what the poet says. 24.2.2014

meaning of writing.

From the time the teacher hit me with the ruler because I forget to miss a line between the date and title in handwriting.
I had to write lines saying mustn't forget to miss a line between the date and title.
The school led me to believe I was thick because they didn't understand that I found it hard to learn.
In the end I wrote lines that came from my mind some even rhymed. 24.2.2014

So far apart.  
We may be so far apart but you are so close to my heart.
I love you so much as you love me but I miss you so much it hurts.
Words are just said by feelings.
Words are said by truth and make believe.
Words are said by how life treats us at the time when we say what we are saying.
How words make us feel when words are said.
This explains why there's no perfect or straightforward life.
No life can carry on without ups and downs.


It's so dark here I can't see a thing but I can feel something going on or someone moving about.
I can hear flying and flapping every time I move about so I must keep still.
I must keep calm and not scream and shout.
No way is there a mouse in this house.
As they fly they sense every time I breath.
Watch out as they may come out like a bat out of hell! 24.2.2014

I don't miss you anymore at all.
I used to come see you such a lot now I don't want anything to do with you anymore.
I used to think about you all the time but now I don't think about you at all anymore.
I was a victim of your love but not anymore.
I once thought I'd got you out of my head now I write about you a lot to get you out of my head for life now that I have got you out of my life.
It's like writing lines in school when you have been naughty; I must get you out of my head because I feel nothing for you no more!
You are like an evil monster coming out at night the nightmare of my life.
Stop haunting my mind! 24.2.2014

The writer.

So many words are better off said on paper rather than speaking them.
Yet nothing seems to make sense on paper like it does in the mind.
The pen can't always write fast enough to the mind or the pen and mind may say more than they should.
What and how I write isn't about talent, it's just my way of communicating saying what's on my mind.
Saying what you want to say is all that counts.
All the same words are inside your mind.
I guess I'm just a person who finds it easier to write than speak but it was never like that when I was in school.
In school my mind was blank all the time not it's over loaded with thoughts.
How I say things is anyone's guess. 25.2.2014

Depression.

A sadness is a feeling with or without a reason.
If we are honest we all suffer from depression our way not know how we are going to feel each and every day, even throughout each and every day in our own way.
When you listen, read, speak or write the word depression seems so black and white.
Like the world the word depression isn't all black and white when one’s emotions can change one feeling to the other.
Most if not all of us get good and bad days.
We feel up and down in our own way.
It's not easy to understand life.
It's not easy to understand the mind to why we think what, how and why we do.
It can be hard to understand each other too.
In the end we make life hard for each and ourselves without meaning to.
No one can say how long or short the bad times are. 25.2.2014

Words.

The words I write come from pen to paper then I type.
No thoughts of talent, writing is just another way of saying what you are going to say.
There's no easy to communicate.
There's no easy way to understand.
Each and every of communicating is different.
What's written and read counts.
Writing is just writing your thoughts until you can think no more but then with time thoughts come back again.
You can't think forever.
You can't write forever.
Write away until the ink in the pen runs out, very often when you change your pen thoughts are forgotten or new thoughts come. 25.2.2014

Everyone has words.

The ink is running out in the pen.
Everyone has thoughts and words that come and go through the mind.
You don't need to be special, famous and you don't need to be talented.
Just write what's in your mind and what you want to say, and then it's done!
Don't think about what's going to or not going to when you say it, what happens.
Stand up to those who won't give you a chance in life, to those who won't give you the time of day.
Show them you are you. 25.2.2014

I lost my words in my mind because I had to turn my mind elsewhere.
Now I am back to tell over a thousand words more before I stopped writing.
It's not about chasing fame and money it's about the interest in my mind.
What are your thoughts when you read my words that come from my mind?
Everyone has a book in their mind it doesn't mean everyone will write a book though.
Why we have the stress of everyone knowing your business of other parts of your life?
Too much stress when you’re poor to get rich.
The interest what matters.
Whatever happens? 25.2.2014

  

John Keats.

The heartbreak of whatever was going through John Keats's mind for him to have wrote the poetry he though must have been the only way he coped with his life.
When I first picked up his poetry book I hadn't got a clue who John Keats was and what he wrote.
Despite of my interest in writing I have never been much of a reader but then John Keats’s work inspired me a lot.
Thought of poetry never crossed my mind till I read John Keats's work one of his words inspired me to write over a thousand of my own words.
My work isn't poetry or talent, its words and thoughts going through my mind.
I shouldn't have had to be inspired by anyone because John Keats was going through the same thing as me at different time, I just didn't think of writing words until I read John Keats's work. 25.2.2014