Summer at last
The unhappy winter has on far too long.
Summer is here at last but goes far too fast.
The trees were well covered with green leaves that are dark, light and bright green.
The birds are singing in the leaves and the eves. 1997 - 2000
Just a poem.
How do you write a poem?
In a poem you can write the words that you love.
You write the poem on paper then type it out to put in book.
What subject can you write poetry about?
You can write about friendship.
You can write about love.
You can write about the stars up, high, down and above.
You can write about anything you want and anything that comes to your mind.
Poetry is a shorter way to show your and people's feelings about life without writing a story.
A story book is lovely to read and look. 1997 - 2000
I'm your secret valentine.
Please be my secret valentine.
Wherever you are valentine please come come to my mind.
I want someone to love me for me me one day at the right time.
I have never meet anyone who truly wants to be mine.
I am always told that there's someone out there for someone at sometime.
I don't know if you are hard to find valentine.
Who is the valentine girl for you and who is the valentine boy for me?
Just you wait and see.
Come on valentine guess guess who I could be? Late 1996 - early 1997
I wrote this poem at almost the end of 1996 the start of 1997. when something told me I had to come to terms with me and Tony having broken up the first time. The next person in line did not turn out to be the right which did not surprise me.
Summer is here at last but goes far too fast.
The trees were well covered with green leaves that are dark, light and bright green.
The birds are singing in the leaves and the eves. 1997 - 2000
Just a poem.
How do you write a poem?
In a poem you can write the words that you love.
You write the poem on paper then type it out to put in book.
What subject can you write poetry about?
You can write about friendship.
You can write about love.
You can write about the stars up, high, down and above.
You can write about anything you want and anything that comes to your mind.
Poetry is a shorter way to show your and people's feelings about life without writing a story.
A story book is lovely to read and look. 1997 - 2000
I'm your secret valentine.
Please be my secret valentine.
Wherever you are valentine please come come to my mind.
I want someone to love me for me me one day at the right time.
I have never meet anyone who truly wants to be mine.
I am always told that there's someone out there for someone at sometime.
I don't know if you are hard to find valentine.
Who is the valentine girl for you and who is the valentine boy for me?
Just you wait and see.
Come on valentine guess guess who I could be? Late 1996 - early 1997
I wrote this poem at almost the end of 1996 the start of 1997. when something told me I had to come to terms with me and Tony having broken up the first time. The next person in line did not turn out to be the right which did not surprise me.
My mind is all over the place.
There must be men out there as true as Antonio.
Where are these men to be?
Why can't I find a love who want me for me?
Why can't I love who I want to be with?
Why who I want be with will he be with me?
Why can't his feelings match mine?
Still life is not all about me. Written mid summer to Autumn 1997.
Please please make my day.
Please please make my day by coming back to me.
You have pleased me in a lot of ways before.
I hope I have pleased you before: whether you have or not I am pleased to be your girl.
You pleased for the kind of gentleman you were but what's happened to you now?
You will please me even more if you give me a surprise knocking at door.
I wish you will love me forever more.
Please write me a letter!
Please give me a call?
Please at least ask how I am?
This is too much for a woman to ask a man.
Why have you destroyed my heart and leave me so sad and blue?
You played into me because you knew I loved you and you know I still do.
It's so hard to believe what life would be without you, mainly when I am alone and you are with her.
If you don't want me, why can't you see sense and see someone better than her, it does not have to be me.
Why don't you try again my boy, your not good at picking women are you?
What have done wrong, other than finding it hard to fight the problems from my last lover before you?
Why do old relationships spoil it for new relationships?
Pain just takes ages to go.
OK I had one affair, you know he got me drank and got me where he wanted me.
Sorry that was a big mistake now you are making a bigger one.
Why do we keep on hurting one another more than loving one another?
Sorry I did not mean hurt I understand why you are getting your own back on me.
I did not mean to make you so sad and blue. Written 1997.
There must be men out there as true as Antonio.
Where are these men to be?
Why can't I find a love who want me for me?
Why can't I love who I want to be with?
Why who I want be with will he be with me?
Why can't his feelings match mine?
Still life is not all about me. Written mid summer to Autumn 1997.
Please please make my day.
Please please make my day by coming back to me.
You have pleased me in a lot of ways before.
I hope I have pleased you before: whether you have or not I am pleased to be your girl.
You pleased for the kind of gentleman you were but what's happened to you now?
You will please me even more if you give me a surprise knocking at door.
I wish you will love me forever more.
Please write me a letter!
Please give me a call?
Please at least ask how I am?
This is too much for a woman to ask a man.
Why have you destroyed my heart and leave me so sad and blue?
You played into me because you knew I loved you and you know I still do.
It's so hard to believe what life would be without you, mainly when I am alone and you are with her.
If you don't want me, why can't you see sense and see someone better than her, it does not have to be me.
Why don't you try again my boy, your not good at picking women are you?
What have done wrong, other than finding it hard to fight the problems from my last lover before you?
Why do old relationships spoil it for new relationships?
Pain just takes ages to go.
OK I had one affair, you know he got me drank and got me where he wanted me.
Sorry that was a big mistake now you are making a bigger one.
Why do we keep on hurting one another more than loving one another?
Sorry I did not mean hurt I understand why you are getting your own back on me.
I did not mean to make you so sad and blue. Written 1997.
I never want to love again.
I never want to love again.
I just know if I love again I will get hurt again, it will make me worse again.
Who knows what I will do next, I don't know myself.
I don't want to live on this planet with loneliness, I have had enough of this life I do not want to live anymore.
This is the end of love and life, I have had too much pain to bare.
If I get hurt it will get worse I will go round the bend.
It's no good me living for someone I love who does not love me.
I don't know how to love more.
May be I should know I did not know how to love, I thought I knew how to love.
May be I will never ever know how to love, without falling in love too easy.
My heart does not feel and fear love, my heart feels and fears pain.
When I was a younger girl, my heart used to feel love, because I never knew or understood that love can end.
I am just frightened of feeling pain myself, I do not want to hurt another man and I don't want to get hurt myself. Written winter 1996 - 1997.
I treasure only one history love I had.
He is just a poor confused man who does not know what he wants in life.
He is a gentle, loving and caring gentleman.
He gave and took the best he could.
I am more grateful with what he had done for me in two and a half years.
He used to be a romantic wild red rose so now that's the best he goes.
Flowers on every birthday card he send me he chose.
He used to make me feel like the lady of his life.
I loved his smile that made my love for him worth while.
He used to be a very wise man.
He gave me so much love that I can't believe that anyone else could replace.
The love I had for him I treasure by my lonely heart.
I know life is life but I wish we were sharing love together in our hearts.
Now those days are over, my heart has to cope with happiness, laughter, joy sadness and tears.
Happy history is not forgotten to me, it's worth being alone until I can move on to love someone better, new and get rid of all the pain I am going through. Written 1997.
I never want to love again.
I just know if I love again I will get hurt again, it will make me worse again.
Who knows what I will do next, I don't know myself.
I don't want to live on this planet with loneliness, I have had enough of this life I do not want to live anymore.
This is the end of love and life, I have had too much pain to bare.
If I get hurt it will get worse I will go round the bend.
It's no good me living for someone I love who does not love me.
I don't know how to love more.
May be I should know I did not know how to love, I thought I knew how to love.
May be I will never ever know how to love, without falling in love too easy.
My heart does not feel and fear love, my heart feels and fears pain.
When I was a younger girl, my heart used to feel love, because I never knew or understood that love can end.
I am just frightened of feeling pain myself, I do not want to hurt another man and I don't want to get hurt myself. Written winter 1996 - 1997.
I treasure only one history love I had.
He is just a poor confused man who does not know what he wants in life.
He is a gentle, loving and caring gentleman.
He gave and took the best he could.
I am more grateful with what he had done for me in two and a half years.
He used to be a romantic wild red rose so now that's the best he goes.
Flowers on every birthday card he send me he chose.
He used to make me feel like the lady of his life.
I loved his smile that made my love for him worth while.
He used to be a very wise man.
He gave me so much love that I can't believe that anyone else could replace.
The love I had for him I treasure by my lonely heart.
I know life is life but I wish we were sharing love together in our hearts.
Now those days are over, my heart has to cope with happiness, laughter, joy sadness and tears.
Happy history is not forgotten to me, it's worth being alone until I can move on to love someone better, new and get rid of all the pain I am going through. Written 1997.
I think I am having a a breakdown.
I think I am having a nervous break down.
I feel like cracking up, I don't know what to do or where to turn.
I can't see what's a head of me.
Something or someone is pushing me over the edge.
What or and who could it be? 1997 - 2000
This was a time I was in a bad state of mind. I feel very guilty writing such a poem, it was a time I was cracking I had to do something to come terms with what I was going through at the time. Sorry I was feeling sorry for myself at that time. If there's anything I have learned now that life goes on after all. Nothing or and no one will take over my mind like that again.
Life.
Why is there a world?
Why are we ever born?
What is the world coming to?
Sooner we are born we are dead.
Life can hit you the face without a warning so make the most of it. 5.8.2002
Disability and work.
Why is society and the world is so confusing?
Why put people with disabilities down?
Why don't you give us a chance to live our lives how we want?
You would not like people telling you that you can't live your life how you want to.
Why don't you learn to understand people with disabilities, as much as you may learn you may not know as a non disabled person what it's like to have a disabilities.
Why don't you get people with disabilities a job if they want one, them support getting in the job!
We may well be slow but accept how we are then we will do a good job. 6.8.2002
Words that come to mind.
I dread the snow blocking the doors now winter is on it's way.
I look forward to seeing snow on the windows outside.
The winter comes to life with snow but not when it stops transport. 7.8.2002
I think I am having a nervous break down.
I feel like cracking up, I don't know what to do or where to turn.
I can't see what's a head of me.
Something or someone is pushing me over the edge.
What or and who could it be? 1997 - 2000
This was a time I was in a bad state of mind. I feel very guilty writing such a poem, it was a time I was cracking I had to do something to come terms with what I was going through at the time. Sorry I was feeling sorry for myself at that time. If there's anything I have learned now that life goes on after all. Nothing or and no one will take over my mind like that again.
Life.
Why is there a world?
Why are we ever born?
What is the world coming to?
Sooner we are born we are dead.
Life can hit you the face without a warning so make the most of it. 5.8.2002
Disability and work.
Why is society and the world is so confusing?
Why put people with disabilities down?
Why don't you give us a chance to live our lives how we want?
You would not like people telling you that you can't live your life how you want to.
Why don't you learn to understand people with disabilities, as much as you may learn you may not know as a non disabled person what it's like to have a disabilities.
Why don't you get people with disabilities a job if they want one, them support getting in the job!
We may well be slow but accept how we are then we will do a good job. 6.8.2002
Words that come to mind.
I dread the snow blocking the doors now winter is on it's way.
I look forward to seeing snow on the windows outside.
The winter comes to life with snow but not when it stops transport. 7.8.2002
My disability.
Like to have the chance to live my life without been put down and turned away from society, if I like many other people with disabilities are not accepted, why are we on this earth?
It hurts to hear the truth of what we don't want to hear but when we have too many people telling us difference things we get confused.
May be if I wait for people they will wait for me.
I am very willing to learn things.
When everyone is not thinking the same of what the rules of people with disabilities right it becomes very confusing.
Support should be given when that person wants it but otherwise help them speak their own minds.
All we need is time and support 12-18.8.2002
How did he write?
How did he read what he wrote?
He must have been a remarkable guy.
How did he write if he was blind?
See people with disabilities are creative, they can get jobs.
We all work in difference ways sense, feel, sight, smell, taste and touch or even all.
How did he know that he was writing what he wanted to write?
How did he get down on paper what was going on through his mind?
I guess he could not see pictures and he may not have got the support.
I guess there was not braille or any other support in the 1600s.
The 1600s was John Milton,s time, life must have been dark for him been blind.
It's hard for someone to understand who is blind.
Blind is not just blind in sight, dyslexia is a word blindness, Autism is a mind blindness.
People with all kinds of disabilities manage more than what people think, even though we are slower because of our disabilities that makes us a better than people who have not got anything to slow them down.
With not seeing you must worry that you are feeling and touching the wrong things.
How do you know if you are touching right people?
The answer only by voice.
It must be hurtful not to see what you have achieved.
I think a lot of people who are clever have disabilities.
The blind may have a lot of support now but not in John Milton,s time. 19.21.8.2002
Like to have the chance to live my life without been put down and turned away from society, if I like many other people with disabilities are not accepted, why are we on this earth?
It hurts to hear the truth of what we don't want to hear but when we have too many people telling us difference things we get confused.
May be if I wait for people they will wait for me.
I am very willing to learn things.
When everyone is not thinking the same of what the rules of people with disabilities right it becomes very confusing.
Support should be given when that person wants it but otherwise help them speak their own minds.
All we need is time and support 12-18.8.2002
How did he write?
How did he read what he wrote?
He must have been a remarkable guy.
How did he write if he was blind?
See people with disabilities are creative, they can get jobs.
We all work in difference ways sense, feel, sight, smell, taste and touch or even all.
How did he know that he was writing what he wanted to write?
How did he get down on paper what was going on through his mind?
I guess he could not see pictures and he may not have got the support.
I guess there was not braille or any other support in the 1600s.
The 1600s was John Milton,s time, life must have been dark for him been blind.
It's hard for someone to understand who is blind.
Blind is not just blind in sight, dyslexia is a word blindness, Autism is a mind blindness.
People with all kinds of disabilities manage more than what people think, even though we are slower because of our disabilities that makes us a better than people who have not got anything to slow them down.
With not seeing you must worry that you are feeling and touching the wrong things.
How do you know if you are touching right people?
The answer only by voice.
It must be hurtful not to see what you have achieved.
I think a lot of people who are clever have disabilities.
The blind may have a lot of support now but not in John Milton,s time. 19.21.8.2002
Jonathan Swift 1667-1745.
He wrote about the ships sailing on the rough sea.
He must have been bought up into the world of sea.
The sails blowing in the wind.
He had epilepsy just like me.
I am so lucky to have tablets to cure my epilepsy.
There always a way of achieving things in life whether you have a disability, health problem or not.
You just need to get the help and support in what you want to do and show willing.
Years ago there were not any chances or support but a lot of frame people with disabilities achieved things at home because they knew society would not accept them but sadly their work was only seen after their death, society knew it was wrong then.
People knew they had things wrong with them back then but did not know what like we do today. 22,23.8.2002
Theses poems are from Christmas short story, ' THE OUTSIDE CHRISTMAS TREE.' Based times when Christmas used to be Christmas.
Christmas Eve.
It was twelve o, clock at Midnight.
The children were a sleep.
Father Christmas came down the chimney.
Good boys and girls get Christmas presents.
Can you hear the bells ringing?
I hope you are fast asleep on Christmas day.
He wrote about the ships sailing on the rough sea.
He must have been bought up into the world of sea.
The sails blowing in the wind.
He had epilepsy just like me.
I am so lucky to have tablets to cure my epilepsy.
There always a way of achieving things in life whether you have a disability, health problem or not.
You just need to get the help and support in what you want to do and show willing.
Years ago there were not any chances or support but a lot of frame people with disabilities achieved things at home because they knew society would not accept them but sadly their work was only seen after their death, society knew it was wrong then.
People knew they had things wrong with them back then but did not know what like we do today. 22,23.8.2002
Theses poems are from Christmas short story, ' THE OUTSIDE CHRISTMAS TREE.' Based times when Christmas used to be Christmas.
Christmas Eve.
It was twelve o, clock at Midnight.
The children were a sleep.
Father Christmas came down the chimney.
Good boys and girls get Christmas presents.
Can you hear the bells ringing?
I hope you are fast asleep on Christmas day.
Christmas day Merry and Sherry opened their presents three o, clock on a snowy Christmas morning.
The girls were half a sleep but too happy to carry on sleeping, they could not wait any longer.
" The presents are not under the Christmas tree, Merry?"
" Why not, where is the Christmas tree Sherry?"
" I think we have got up far too early, Merry."
For some reason Sherry picked up the maroon curtain and looked through the window.
" Look Merry, it's pure white snow out there and there's the Christmas tree."
" Don't be silly Sherry the Christmas can't be outside, Father Christmas may have taken it down thinking we are not a sleep."
" Look through the Window Merry!"
"So the Christmas tree is there Sherry, I must be seeing as I am dreaming."
" It's true, Merry."
" I know Sherry."
The girls opened some presents round the tree in the snow.
In those there were very little children had for Christmas but they were still happy with what they did have.
Merry and Sherry had oranges and nuts but the Christmas been outside was a present for them as it's self that's how happy they were.
There were very little presents the girls could open before Mummy and Daddy got but they still had oranges and nuts. 17.18.10.2002
This poem is from another short story of mine called ' IN THE DAYS ANIMALS COULD TALK.'
Burt the bird.
There was a black bird called Burt.
He sang in so many words.
He ate so many worms that were burned from his wife Mrs Wormy Bird.
It was surprising his throat was not red enough to be burned and hurt.
Mrs Bird would boil all the worms in a saucepan.
The worms would be as black as coal. 29.7.2002 - 14.15.10.2002
EVERYDAY GOD BRINGS A NEW DAY.
When you wake up in the morning light.
The weather could be dull or bright.
The day could be good or bad even a mixer of good and bad.
Whatever kind of day we still have to face life, just can't hide away.
No matter how frightened we may be everyday can't stay the same, even though happiness what we like.
Life goes on, the longer you leave the worse it gets.
Whatever is good it's worth making it better but don't make it any worse if it's bad.
Nothing happens over night, it takes time and sometimes money.
I am not a church goer but I don't have a problem with people who go to church.
Everyone each to their own.
I believe when things are going wrong, where there's a will there's a way.
There's a light at the end of the tunnel one way or another.
Life goes on however it goes on but life is what you make it. 21-27.10.2002
To get along in life.
Keep your head up high to the ceiling and the sky.
Never tell a lie.
Be trustful towards people, then they may well be trusting back towards you.
Never let people walk all over you, never trust them if they do let you down and cross you.
Let what you want in life come to you.
It's easy us saying these things, it's doing or not doing these things because we all make mistakes and we tells lies if we say we don't make mistakes.
We do things that we regret at times, with most things there's no going back and starting again to put things how they should have been the first time.
Don't hurt people because they may turn to hate you.
Turn your back on people who hate you, you don't need them there are plenty of people who will like you if you try hard enough, there's good and bad in everything, just don't make the same mistake to push other people away.
Never hide away from the truth, even if your in the wrong.
You win some: you lose some.
Give the peace to the world then the world give peace back to you.
Be strong, let them go if they are going to go.
Never depend on people to be in your life forever.
You can't do everything by the book.
You can only do your best. 19-18.2.2003
When you wake up in the morning light.
The weather could be dull or bright.
The day could be good or bad even a mixer of good and bad.
Whatever kind of day we still have to face life, just can't hide away.
No matter how frightened we may be everyday can't stay the same, even though happiness what we like.
Life goes on, the longer you leave the worse it gets.
Whatever is good it's worth making it better but don't make it any worse if it's bad.
Nothing happens over night, it takes time and sometimes money.
I am not a church goer but I don't have a problem with people who go to church.
Everyone each to their own.
I believe when things are going wrong, where there's a will there's a way.
There's a light at the end of the tunnel one way or another.
Life goes on however it goes on but life is what you make it. 21-27.10.2002
To get along in life.
Keep your head up high to the ceiling and the sky.
Never tell a lie.
Be trustful towards people, then they may well be trusting back towards you.
Never let people walk all over you, never trust them if they do let you down and cross you.
Let what you want in life come to you.
It's easy us saying these things, it's doing or not doing these things because we all make mistakes and we tells lies if we say we don't make mistakes.
We do things that we regret at times, with most things there's no going back and starting again to put things how they should have been the first time.
Don't hurt people because they may turn to hate you.
Turn your back on people who hate you, you don't need them there are plenty of people who will like you if you try hard enough, there's good and bad in everything, just don't make the same mistake to push other people away.
Never hide away from the truth, even if your in the wrong.
You win some: you lose some.
Give the peace to the world then the world give peace back to you.
Be strong, let them go if they are going to go.
Never depend on people to be in your life forever.
You can't do everything by the book.
You can only do your best. 19-18.2.2003
The World.
Why war on top of crime, is it not unsafe enough?
Why war and crime at all?
Why should we live in fear of becoming victims?
It seems as if the whole world is coming to peace.
If things are how they are now, what will it be like for the next generation?
Wherever we are from, why can't we feel free in our country, instead of having to lock the door and instead having to live in fear of walking down the street?
Why do people have to hurt one another, what happen to the days if you did not like them you would not speak to them?
You would not even go near someone if you did not know them, let alone liking or disliking them, yet we were less frightened to speak to anyone back then.
Today no one knows anyone not even the people who live next door them, it's sad because people had more friends once they knew people next door to them and some people knew every person who lived in their street.
It should not matter who and what we are, we are all human beings and we all want peace.
War gives us more pain so does crime. 3-19.3.2003
Art.
Paints
Crayons
Felts
Coloring pencils
Paper
Board
Frames
Pictures
Art is full of feeling and life, it works like poetry, plays, novels and short stories.
Every picture tells a story. 2-19.3.2003
Childhood.
I was an Autistic child but only very mild.
I used to cry when the light was off at night.
I used to cry when I wet the bed at night.
I used to feel alone even though I was not alone.
I used to hear voices down stairs, I did not want to miss out on a thing. 27.5.2003
This is a poem about a point myself and Anthony were having one of many of our rough patches together, when we were both drink at Christmas time in 2003.
Why war on top of crime, is it not unsafe enough?
Why war and crime at all?
Why should we live in fear of becoming victims?
It seems as if the whole world is coming to peace.
If things are how they are now, what will it be like for the next generation?
Wherever we are from, why can't we feel free in our country, instead of having to lock the door and instead having to live in fear of walking down the street?
Why do people have to hurt one another, what happen to the days if you did not like them you would not speak to them?
You would not even go near someone if you did not know them, let alone liking or disliking them, yet we were less frightened to speak to anyone back then.
Today no one knows anyone not even the people who live next door them, it's sad because people had more friends once they knew people next door to them and some people knew every person who lived in their street.
It should not matter who and what we are, we are all human beings and we all want peace.
War gives us more pain so does crime. 3-19.3.2003
Art.
Paints
Crayons
Felts
Coloring pencils
Paper
Board
Frames
Pictures
Art is full of feeling and life, it works like poetry, plays, novels and short stories.
Every picture tells a story. 2-19.3.2003
Childhood.
I was an Autistic child but only very mild.
I used to cry when the light was off at night.
I used to cry when I wet the bed at night.
I used to feel alone even though I was not alone.
I used to hear voices down stairs, I did not want to miss out on a thing. 27.5.2003
This is a poem about a point myself and Anthony were having one of many of our rough patches together, when we were both drink at Christmas time in 2003.
The next morning.
When I have been drinking too much at night, I feel as if the room is spinning round and round the next morning.
Never again, oh my head, I think I will go to bed to sleep it off.
Oh no I feel sick I must run to the toilet quick.
I must stop, I have no idea what I'm doing.
I don't drink as much as I used to drink.
I saw my boyfriend, now the college is off for the Christmas holidays.
He takes good care of me, he advised me to cut down on my drinking.
I normally only drink heavy Saturday nights, that's when I get carried away.
Life is far too short to waste.
I must eat to get over the hang over.
I must manage to get on with my life without putting at risk.
Have a good time, get drunk but don't kill yourself.
I am just a worried girlfriend. 29.12.2003
You may see some poems about another friend of a friends who sadly died.
Christmas time.
I think about being with you at Christmas.
I dream about you at night and think about you in the day.
Many times I wish I could walk through your door of heaven.
We would have had such a lovely time together.
I can just picture a roaring warm coal fire. 30.1.2003
Cruel world.
I know I am a Church of England.
Why did god, if there's such a man had to take you away from the world so early?
Why did you have to go before we met?
War has spoiled our life together that's never happened but has spoiled it forever.
No memory and no fun.
Not even one thing for you and me to look forward to.
No chance to see what I should have seen, still it was not to be.
Christmas, death days and birthdays upset me more.30.12.2003
I want to Link this poem to my story ' TALKING TO THE GRAVES.'
I must talk to you, even though I don't know if your real or not.
When I have been drinking too much at night, I feel as if the room is spinning round and round the next morning.
Never again, oh my head, I think I will go to bed to sleep it off.
Oh no I feel sick I must run to the toilet quick.
I must stop, I have no idea what I'm doing.
I don't drink as much as I used to drink.
I saw my boyfriend, now the college is off for the Christmas holidays.
He takes good care of me, he advised me to cut down on my drinking.
I normally only drink heavy Saturday nights, that's when I get carried away.
Life is far too short to waste.
I must eat to get over the hang over.
I must manage to get on with my life without putting at risk.
Have a good time, get drunk but don't kill yourself.
I am just a worried girlfriend. 29.12.2003
You may see some poems about another friend of a friends who sadly died.
Christmas time.
I think about being with you at Christmas.
I dream about you at night and think about you in the day.
Many times I wish I could walk through your door of heaven.
We would have had such a lovely time together.
I can just picture a roaring warm coal fire. 30.1.2003
Cruel world.
I know I am a Church of England.
Why did god, if there's such a man had to take you away from the world so early?
Why did you have to go before we met?
War has spoiled our life together that's never happened but has spoiled it forever.
No memory and no fun.
Not even one thing for you and me to look forward to.
No chance to see what I should have seen, still it was not to be.
Christmas, death days and birthdays upset me more.30.12.2003
I want to Link this poem to my story ' TALKING TO THE GRAVES.'
I must talk to you, even though I don't know if your real or not.
I might be here, you might be there but either of us could be anywhere.
Whatever happened nothing has changed for us, it never will.
I saw you looking at the newspaper, you had thick blond curly hair
I started to feel something for you as a person but I thought I may have to control it because you may have a wife.
I knew there was never going to be a you and me because you may be married or not for real.
To my surprise in my dreams you kissed, I could not believe my luck.
The hard thing was I was given a choose bet ween you and your twin brother who as well could be in heaven.
It was just a dream I had that turned into a nightmare, no one knows if you were a story or real that I will never know.
I was so much looking froward to seeing you, when you would have come home from war.
Whether you lived or died it was either a nightmare or a dream but not real.
I was looking forward making a fresh start.
At night, there are so many stars in the sky.
I really do believe that you and all good people in heaven are there. 30.12.2003
Think about!
Think about the good and the bad in today's world.
Drugs give people the worse grief of all in today's world.
Murders, rapes, mugging and many more say it all.
The greatest thing in the world is love and support to us all.
We can't have good news all the while but there's more bad news than good. 30.12.2003
Life.
Why do we moan?
What do we moan about?
Do we stop to think about people worse off than us because they don't moan.
The kind of people who don't have enough money to feed themselves and dress themselves.
People who have to sleep on hard floors.
No toys for children.
No magazines, make up and clothes for teenagers.
Why do they make out they are always happy yet they don't have anything at all.
30.12.2003
Whatever happened nothing has changed for us, it never will.
I saw you looking at the newspaper, you had thick blond curly hair
I started to feel something for you as a person but I thought I may have to control it because you may have a wife.
I knew there was never going to be a you and me because you may be married or not for real.
To my surprise in my dreams you kissed, I could not believe my luck.
The hard thing was I was given a choose bet ween you and your twin brother who as well could be in heaven.
It was just a dream I had that turned into a nightmare, no one knows if you were a story or real that I will never know.
I was so much looking froward to seeing you, when you would have come home from war.
Whether you lived or died it was either a nightmare or a dream but not real.
I was looking forward making a fresh start.
At night, there are so many stars in the sky.
I really do believe that you and all good people in heaven are there. 30.12.2003
Think about!
Think about the good and the bad in today's world.
Drugs give people the worse grief of all in today's world.
Murders, rapes, mugging and many more say it all.
The greatest thing in the world is love and support to us all.
We can't have good news all the while but there's more bad news than good. 30.12.2003
Life.
Why do we moan?
What do we moan about?
Do we stop to think about people worse off than us because they don't moan.
The kind of people who don't have enough money to feed themselves and dress themselves.
People who have to sleep on hard floors.
No toys for children.
No magazines, make up and clothes for teenagers.
Why do they make out they are always happy yet they don't have anything at all.
30.12.2003
Animals.
Animals are loving to us if we are loving to them.
Not all people are kind to animals.
Some animals like some people can be frightened of strangers until they get to know them.
Some people can be frightened of people until they get to know them.
Some animals can be frightened of animals until they get to know them.
Anything can happen in animal and human nature.
In a lot of way animals are brighter than human beings.
Most of us find it hard to understand animals, may be animals understand us better than we understand them.
We are not clever to understand how animals talk but they can understand us when we talk.
If we hurt we can hurt back but animals can hurt people even harder if they hurt but you can't blame them.
At the end of the day animals know more what they want than human beings do.
Not all animals can stick up for themselves just like not all people can stick for their selves.
( Who will and can stick for animals been picked by human beings and other animals?)
Most people treat animals like soft toys rather than living animals.
( Why do pick on living things that can't fight back?)
We are frightened of something coming back to us.
We should not start it in the first place.
It come only comes back on us in the end, we have to accept that it services us right. 30.12.2003
Spiders.
Big black spiders.
Big black bodied spiders.
Eight black legs.
Spiders come rushing without you knowing.
Some of us love them.
Some of us hate them.
Most of us are scared of them.
Some of us have nightmares about spiders.
Most of us catch spiders in jars and keep them as pets.
I am not scared of them, I just don't like them mostly when they are there when you don't know they are there.
I don't like them around me.
What about you? 12-16.4.2004
Animals are loving to us if we are loving to them.
Not all people are kind to animals.
Some animals like some people can be frightened of strangers until they get to know them.
Some people can be frightened of people until they get to know them.
Some animals can be frightened of animals until they get to know them.
Anything can happen in animal and human nature.
In a lot of way animals are brighter than human beings.
Most of us find it hard to understand animals, may be animals understand us better than we understand them.
We are not clever to understand how animals talk but they can understand us when we talk.
If we hurt we can hurt back but animals can hurt people even harder if they hurt but you can't blame them.
At the end of the day animals know more what they want than human beings do.
Not all animals can stick up for themselves just like not all people can stick for their selves.
( Who will and can stick for animals been picked by human beings and other animals?)
Most people treat animals like soft toys rather than living animals.
( Why do pick on living things that can't fight back?)
We are frightened of something coming back to us.
We should not start it in the first place.
It come only comes back on us in the end, we have to accept that it services us right. 30.12.2003
Spiders.
Big black spiders.
Big black bodied spiders.
Eight black legs.
Spiders come rushing without you knowing.
Some of us love them.
Some of us hate them.
Most of us are scared of them.
Some of us have nightmares about spiders.
Most of us catch spiders in jars and keep them as pets.
I am not scared of them, I just don't like them mostly when they are there when you don't know they are there.
I don't like them around me.
What about you? 12-16.4.2004
Why am I unhappy.
I never seem to sleep well.
The boyfriend and I tend to be jumping down each others' throats.
My Mother is on my case, when she's here don't need but when she's not here I need help.
The Job center not my case to get work but they don't want me to work because of my benefits.
I want to work though, I'd love to work but I get turned away because of my disability. 15-16.4.2004
Depression.
I can wake up and feel low in the mornings for no reason at all.
Sometimes I can feel as if I am going to cry but it does not always.
How strange is that?
Sometimes I start laughing but once I do I have a job to stop the same as crying or I can feels as if I am going to do either but I can't do neither.
I can feel sad for no reason yet I can feel happy for no reason. 19.4.2004
Life goes on.
The children play.
The teenagers dress up, grow up, have boyfriends, girlfriends.
Most adults become Mums, Dads, Grans, Granddads.
Going out and getting drunk.
Going to college and getting a job.
Getting old with a walking stick.
Look around the condor, life has gone.
Where has it gone?
Life and time has not gone anywhere.
What are we doing here in the first place?
Why are we here?
Who and what has bought us here?
Who knows?
Are we going to another world?
These are questions that can't be answered. 20-21.4.2004
I never seem to sleep well.
The boyfriend and I tend to be jumping down each others' throats.
My Mother is on my case, when she's here don't need but when she's not here I need help.
The Job center not my case to get work but they don't want me to work because of my benefits.
I want to work though, I'd love to work but I get turned away because of my disability. 15-16.4.2004
Depression.
I can wake up and feel low in the mornings for no reason at all.
Sometimes I can feel as if I am going to cry but it does not always.
How strange is that?
Sometimes I start laughing but once I do I have a job to stop the same as crying or I can feels as if I am going to do either but I can't do neither.
I can feel sad for no reason yet I can feel happy for no reason. 19.4.2004
Life goes on.
The children play.
The teenagers dress up, grow up, have boyfriends, girlfriends.
Most adults become Mums, Dads, Grans, Granddads.
Going out and getting drunk.
Going to college and getting a job.
Getting old with a walking stick.
Look around the condor, life has gone.
Where has it gone?
Life and time has not gone anywhere.
What are we doing here in the first place?
Why are we here?
Who and what has bought us here?
Who knows?
Are we going to another world?
These are questions that can't be answered. 20-21.4.2004
Home for me
Home for me to bed for the night.
Home for me to feed my month, then out for the night.
Home for me to study.
Home for me to work on my computer.
How for me to draw, write poetry and short stories.22.4.2004
My nightmare.
To look in the mirror to see that I am old and gray.
To see every day of my life waste away.
To scream at seeing wrinkles on my face.
To grow old and moan like my Mother.
To turn not as good looking as I used to be.
I just want to be me, no change when I could be spending money on my health. 23.4.2004
Have I been sleeping: have I been dreaming?
I close my eyes, I hear a heavy storm.
Am I hearing, sleeping or and dreaming?
When I open my eyes, I don't feel as if I have been a sleep at all.
I can't sleep until the following night.
Some nights I feel as if I have no sleep.
Other nights I feel as if I have been to sleep forever. 26-27.4.2004
Home for me to bed for the night.
Home for me to feed my month, then out for the night.
Home for me to study.
Home for me to work on my computer.
How for me to draw, write poetry and short stories.22.4.2004
My nightmare.
To look in the mirror to see that I am old and gray.
To see every day of my life waste away.
To scream at seeing wrinkles on my face.
To grow old and moan like my Mother.
To turn not as good looking as I used to be.
I just want to be me, no change when I could be spending money on my health. 23.4.2004
Have I been sleeping: have I been dreaming?
I close my eyes, I hear a heavy storm.
Am I hearing, sleeping or and dreaming?
When I open my eyes, I don't feel as if I have been a sleep at all.
I can't sleep until the following night.
Some nights I feel as if I have no sleep.
Other nights I feel as if I have been to sleep forever. 26-27.4.2004
It's not easy to make myself understood.
I am not the person I appear to be.
Apart of me is me because I have to be even though of me is what I want to be.
There are things in life I have face that I don't want, If you love me you'd at least try and accept with me.
Like a lot of people I have not much money but I still have to have a life.
I hate depending on people to help me out a lot, mostly I like to do things myself.
You don't make it easy for me, it would be nice just to get a bit of support off you complaining about, without us fall out and without us been close to spiting up.
If you are going to be so silly to let the hard times of society slit us up, well you just can't love me enough.
I get so many strange looks off people because I have a boyfriend who can't seem to understand my tough situations.
I don't want people to feel sorry for me, so stop making a fool out of me!
I hate people saying you don't buy me a drink when you do.
Please don't let society and the people in it get to you, nothing should stop us from loving one another otherwise you don't love me at all.
A lot of people tend to think I beg money off people because I don't have much money myself, that not true I find a way to get through on my own somehow.
Jobs are hard to find for anyone but if you have a disability like myself, it's even harder.
If you have fits like myself and you live alone, your frightened of not waking up.
This is the life I have to face, either love me or don't love me but make up your mind either way!
They just things in life we can't chose to have, it's there whether we like it or not.
As human beings we don't have to everything we say and do.
Mainly the things we don't have a choice is with the government. 22-25.7.2004
What flowers do I like?
Roses
Daffodils
Daises
Bluebells
Buttercups 26.7.2004
I am not the person I appear to be.
Apart of me is me because I have to be even though of me is what I want to be.
There are things in life I have face that I don't want, If you love me you'd at least try and accept with me.
Like a lot of people I have not much money but I still have to have a life.
I hate depending on people to help me out a lot, mostly I like to do things myself.
You don't make it easy for me, it would be nice just to get a bit of support off you complaining about, without us fall out and without us been close to spiting up.
If you are going to be so silly to let the hard times of society slit us up, well you just can't love me enough.
I get so many strange looks off people because I have a boyfriend who can't seem to understand my tough situations.
I don't want people to feel sorry for me, so stop making a fool out of me!
I hate people saying you don't buy me a drink when you do.
Please don't let society and the people in it get to you, nothing should stop us from loving one another otherwise you don't love me at all.
A lot of people tend to think I beg money off people because I don't have much money myself, that not true I find a way to get through on my own somehow.
Jobs are hard to find for anyone but if you have a disability like myself, it's even harder.
If you have fits like myself and you live alone, your frightened of not waking up.
This is the life I have to face, either love me or don't love me but make up your mind either way!
They just things in life we can't chose to have, it's there whether we like it or not.
As human beings we don't have to everything we say and do.
Mainly the things we don't have a choice is with the government. 22-25.7.2004
What flowers do I like?
Roses
Daffodils
Daises
Bluebells
Buttercups 26.7.2004
Life is too short to waste.
Choose what you want out of life, when you get a choice.
Gap life with both hands, with a lot of things in this life you only get one chance.
Never mind the good and the bad, life is here to enjoy and make the most of however long or short it lasts.
Try not to get too stressed out with the bad things in life but enjoy the good. 29.7.2004 - 1.8.2004
Most of these poems are written to tell life as it is in the 21st century.
Christmas.
There would be no point of Christmas without children.
If we think about it there would be no children without Christmas.
Children don't like Christmas forever because children soon grow up and learn Christmas is not like it used to be when they were children.
In the terms of Christmas in the 21st century, Christmas cost more money than it did in the 20th century so it's not as much fun for today's children than it was for yesterday's children.
There again today's children have a lot more than yesterday's children.For eg; even though I have a computer now, I did not have a computer as a child but I was still happy though.
There does not seem to be any white Christmases anymore, in fact I can't remember when the last white Christmas was sometime in the 20th century I guess.
Christmas is just a fairy tale, you spend your childhood thinking there is Father Christmas, then you soon find out truth when your nearly reaching adulthood. 30.12.2004
How I hate Sundays.
I hate Sundays because the days and nights are too short.
It's even worse on dark winter nights, when the days are short and the nights are long but I find Sunday short all day.
The buses either run every hour or every half an hour. 31.12.2004
Choose what you want out of life, when you get a choice.
Gap life with both hands, with a lot of things in this life you only get one chance.
Never mind the good and the bad, life is here to enjoy and make the most of however long or short it lasts.
Try not to get too stressed out with the bad things in life but enjoy the good. 29.7.2004 - 1.8.2004
Most of these poems are written to tell life as it is in the 21st century.
Christmas.
There would be no point of Christmas without children.
If we think about it there would be no children without Christmas.
Children don't like Christmas forever because children soon grow up and learn Christmas is not like it used to be when they were children.
In the terms of Christmas in the 21st century, Christmas cost more money than it did in the 20th century so it's not as much fun for today's children than it was for yesterday's children.
There again today's children have a lot more than yesterday's children.For eg; even though I have a computer now, I did not have a computer as a child but I was still happy though.
There does not seem to be any white Christmases anymore, in fact I can't remember when the last white Christmas was sometime in the 20th century I guess.
Christmas is just a fairy tale, you spend your childhood thinking there is Father Christmas, then you soon find out truth when your nearly reaching adulthood. 30.12.2004
How I hate Sundays.
I hate Sundays because the days and nights are too short.
It's even worse on dark winter nights, when the days are short and the nights are long but I find Sunday short all day.
The buses either run every hour or every half an hour. 31.12.2004
In the mood to write.
I open up a page to write, then my mind goes blank.
There's either too much on my mind or nothing at all.
When I have a lot of my mind my pen writes with it, at the same time I don't find it very easy to take notice how it looks on paper.
My writing always seems to look very untidy, then I type it if I can make sense of what I have written in the first place.
I try to tidy my work up on paper after I have written it but I may support to do so because I don't always notice every mistakes, which is due to my dyslexia. 31.12.2004
Understanding people with Autism.
We are not always what we look like.
We are not always what we seem like.
We may the same the wrong things through misunderstanding without meaning to anyone or anything an harm.
We feel unhappy and cross when people get unhappy and cross us because of our disability and being understood.
Sometime we appear to be who and what we are not.
Sometimes we seem selfish but we don't mean to be.
We tend to feel down because of having to appear misunderstood it's does not make us feel as if we are having equal lives to non - disabled people.
Every person with a disability wants to teach people to understand, Autism is not only disability that get misunderstood lot's of people with difference disabilities get misunderstood.7.1.2005
The world today.
What are we we missing in the world?
We are not missing anything.
The good things in life are very few but the world is not all black and white.
Good and bad is however you look at life in each and every way.
Mobile phones.
Computers.
The internet on computers and mobile phone.
In some ways it may make life easy for you but in other ways it could make life hard for you.
The internet is good for searching for information, is that good for you or does it take the old fashioned ways of doing things?
Are we doing less things for ourselves than we used, may be we end up depending on computers too much?
I open up a page to write, then my mind goes blank.
There's either too much on my mind or nothing at all.
When I have a lot of my mind my pen writes with it, at the same time I don't find it very easy to take notice how it looks on paper.
My writing always seems to look very untidy, then I type it if I can make sense of what I have written in the first place.
I try to tidy my work up on paper after I have written it but I may support to do so because I don't always notice every mistakes, which is due to my dyslexia. 31.12.2004
Understanding people with Autism.
We are not always what we look like.
We are not always what we seem like.
We may the same the wrong things through misunderstanding without meaning to anyone or anything an harm.
We feel unhappy and cross when people get unhappy and cross us because of our disability and being understood.
Sometime we appear to be who and what we are not.
Sometimes we seem selfish but we don't mean to be.
We tend to feel down because of having to appear misunderstood it's does not make us feel as if we are having equal lives to non - disabled people.
Every person with a disability wants to teach people to understand, Autism is not only disability that get misunderstood lot's of people with difference disabilities get misunderstood.7.1.2005
The world today.
What are we we missing in the world?
We are not missing anything.
The good things in life are very few but the world is not all black and white.
Good and bad is however you look at life in each and every way.
Mobile phones.
Computers.
The internet on computers and mobile phone.
In some ways it may make life easy for you but in other ways it could make life hard for you.
The internet is good for searching for information, is that good for you or does it take the old fashioned ways of doing things?
Are we doing less things for ourselves than we used, may be we end up depending on computers too much?
Fro eg; the spell check puts our spelling mistakes right but do we remember how spell the right word it has shown us?
It shows that old fashioned spelling tests have gone out the window.
Mind you for years we used book dictionary, how many of us learned the word as we found the word?
How many of us try to work out a sum before going on the calculator?
If we are not careful could on computers so much that we won't be learning anything ourselves, well could be the next generation anyway.
The internet could save us going to the library but then put the libraries out of business.
It can be good to listen to our music and could save us a lot of money in cds and that.
Save us a lot of work with pens and paper, if you make a lot of mistakes clear the screen rather than wasting loads of paper and getting through load of pens.
Like I said it is not all good and not all bad, it can save and cause you to spend
a lot of money in many ways, mainly with all these down loads. 12.5.2005
It shows that old fashioned spelling tests have gone out the window.
Mind you for years we used book dictionary, how many of us learned the word as we found the word?
How many of us try to work out a sum before going on the calculator?
If we are not careful could on computers so much that we won't be learning anything ourselves, well could be the next generation anyway.
The internet could save us going to the library but then put the libraries out of business.
It can be good to listen to our music and could save us a lot of money in cds and that.
Save us a lot of work with pens and paper, if you make a lot of mistakes clear the screen rather than wasting loads of paper and getting through load of pens.
Like I said it is not all good and not all bad, it can save and cause you to spend
a lot of money in many ways, mainly with all these down loads. 12.5.2005
The bad in today's life.
Today more lives turn into death through murders, rapes, muggings and many nasty things in the world today.
Illnesses are very few and in between hospitals have equipment and research they used to have.
Children are now hurting their parents and teachers.
Adults can get sent to jail if they stick for themselves.
I would not like to think of the world in the next generation because we will be having to let children do what they want to.
Thank god, I will never know how worse it's going to get.
If that is not true, is it true that dead people look down on us, if so what would they think about this generation now?
This does not mean to say there is not any good in the world today.
I just hope we are more opened minded to the world than what we were or are we too opened minded, who knows!
Sometimes too much said can take respect away : not enough said nothing gets heard or and done.
Years ago it was hush hush or no one knew a thing.
Children were seen not heard. 13.5.2005
Today more lives turn into death through murders, rapes, muggings and many nasty things in the world today.
Illnesses are very few and in between hospitals have equipment and research they used to have.
Children are now hurting their parents and teachers.
Adults can get sent to jail if they stick for themselves.
I would not like to think of the world in the next generation because we will be having to let children do what they want to.
Thank god, I will never know how worse it's going to get.
If that is not true, is it true that dead people look down on us, if so what would they think about this generation now?
This does not mean to say there is not any good in the world today.
I just hope we are more opened minded to the world than what we were or are we too opened minded, who knows!
Sometimes too much said can take respect away : not enough said nothing gets heard or and done.
Years ago it was hush hush or no one knew a thing.
Children were seen not heard. 13.5.2005
The good about today's world.
It's good that we can use our voice and say how we feel about life.
It's also good that we can use our voice in private as well as public.
We really need to support one another more than we ever did before, may be we are aware of so much more.
People's problems have come a lot more out in the open than what they were, mainly when it comes to crime, relationship break ups and other things too.
There was a time when people never knew how to talk about these things because they were never taught how to.
You carried out pictures out in your minds not knowing how to talk about, whatever happened was either not talked about or it would take a long time to be said.
Most of the time it was never understood once it was said, depending what was said.
In the eyes of society no one knew anything, now no one knows no one because you don't know who you can trust with too much crime about.
If you spoke, you could not explain because you were seen not heard.
Doctors and nurses are more educated than they used to be or should be.
You can talk more open that you used to but we still have a long way to go.
Changing for good and bad will never stop.
We can go on forever on what's better and worse in today's world. 14.5.2005
Remember, never forget.
Never forget the hungry people in the 3rd world.
Why do we have to be reminded by reading newspapers and television?
Why can't we just remember these things in our minds, how selfish are we?
We spend too much time complaining and moaning about our own problems when there are people worse off than ourselves.
We have homes and money, these people have nothing.
They smile, we are as unhappy as if we have the whole world on top of us.
What is life all about? Who knows!
It all does not seem to make sense. 15.5.2005
It's good that we can use our voice and say how we feel about life.
It's also good that we can use our voice in private as well as public.
We really need to support one another more than we ever did before, may be we are aware of so much more.
People's problems have come a lot more out in the open than what they were, mainly when it comes to crime, relationship break ups and other things too.
There was a time when people never knew how to talk about these things because they were never taught how to.
You carried out pictures out in your minds not knowing how to talk about, whatever happened was either not talked about or it would take a long time to be said.
Most of the time it was never understood once it was said, depending what was said.
In the eyes of society no one knew anything, now no one knows no one because you don't know who you can trust with too much crime about.
If you spoke, you could not explain because you were seen not heard.
Doctors and nurses are more educated than they used to be or should be.
You can talk more open that you used to but we still have a long way to go.
Changing for good and bad will never stop.
We can go on forever on what's better and worse in today's world. 14.5.2005
Remember, never forget.
Never forget the hungry people in the 3rd world.
Why do we have to be reminded by reading newspapers and television?
Why can't we just remember these things in our minds, how selfish are we?
We spend too much time complaining and moaning about our own problems when there are people worse off than ourselves.
We have homes and money, these people have nothing.
They smile, we are as unhappy as if we have the whole world on top of us.
What is life all about? Who knows!
It all does not seem to make sense. 15.5.2005
Go for it!
If it's moves round in your hand, draw it paint it and write about it!
If you want to do something in life, then do it, never waist your own or anyoneles' time.
Tomorrow will never come unless you make it come.
Today is too long without doing anything at all.
There will be no looking back, you cannot make yesterday into today.
If it stays, draw it!
Draw it with a pencil.
Paint it with a paint brush.
That's the picture you get, that tells the tales and stories in words.
If you want to do something never waste time.
Tomorrow may never come, you sadly may well be gone.
There will be no looking back at time that has gone past.
So go for it now!
You will never know what's round the condor.
You only live once go for it!
You may live to hear the tale. 1.6.2005
Life.
There's nothing wrong with asking one's name.
What some people say and do can be difference things, including me.
We are young and stupid hoping to become older and wiser.
No I am wrong, I mean younger and wiser but it does not work that way.
The night is dark: the morning is light.
In time you will see that light at the end of the tunnel.
You can't always get what you want : good things can come to those who wait.
Never make a promise you can't keep, we are all to blame for that at some point in our lives. 11.6.2005
If it's moves round in your hand, draw it paint it and write about it!
If you want to do something in life, then do it, never waist your own or anyoneles' time.
Tomorrow will never come unless you make it come.
Today is too long without doing anything at all.
There will be no looking back, you cannot make yesterday into today.
If it stays, draw it!
Draw it with a pencil.
Paint it with a paint brush.
That's the picture you get, that tells the tales and stories in words.
If you want to do something never waste time.
Tomorrow may never come, you sadly may well be gone.
There will be no looking back at time that has gone past.
So go for it now!
You will never know what's round the condor.
You only live once go for it!
You may live to hear the tale. 1.6.2005
Life.
There's nothing wrong with asking one's name.
What some people say and do can be difference things, including me.
We are young and stupid hoping to become older and wiser.
No I am wrong, I mean younger and wiser but it does not work that way.
The night is dark: the morning is light.
In time you will see that light at the end of the tunnel.
You can't always get what you want : good things can come to those who wait.
Never make a promise you can't keep, we are all to blame for that at some point in our lives. 11.6.2005
Breaking point problem at times.
Never take too much on that you can't cope with.
Never have nothing to do so your life won't be full filled.
There's no such word as psychology when the human brain is hard to understand.
There are no real answers to why we think like we do.
It's worse when the mind is confused and when the person does not know what to do.
If there are no heads, there are no brains.
Brain is not a word: it's just inside the mind of one's head.
It just gives one a message to tell them what to say.
As human beings, we are not clever, we just say what our brains tell us to say which normally a load of rubbish anyway. 12.6.2005
Silly sayings.
If you don't meet the light at the end of the tunnel, then climb the mountain but don't fall.
If happiness still does not go your way, built a brick wall brick by brick.
Built the wall starting from the bottom and work your way to the top.
Slowly you will get what your aiming for.
Another step is step by step.
Take one step to another until you get to the top.
Don't except it to happen over night, except to take as long as it takes. 13.6.2005
It's another world.
Make believe is fiction, make believe is not the truth.
Non - fiction is not make believe, non - fiction is the truth.
You don't get what you wish for but you can only hope for what you want.
You can't except what you want to come true.
It's better to create characters out of your head.
Base these characters on real life.
Places can be create out of real life or everything can be made up out of one's head. ( Make believe your in another world.) 14.6.2005
Never take too much on that you can't cope with.
Never have nothing to do so your life won't be full filled.
There's no such word as psychology when the human brain is hard to understand.
There are no real answers to why we think like we do.
It's worse when the mind is confused and when the person does not know what to do.
If there are no heads, there are no brains.
Brain is not a word: it's just inside the mind of one's head.
It just gives one a message to tell them what to say.
As human beings, we are not clever, we just say what our brains tell us to say which normally a load of rubbish anyway. 12.6.2005
Silly sayings.
If you don't meet the light at the end of the tunnel, then climb the mountain but don't fall.
If happiness still does not go your way, built a brick wall brick by brick.
Built the wall starting from the bottom and work your way to the top.
Slowly you will get what your aiming for.
Another step is step by step.
Take one step to another until you get to the top.
Don't except it to happen over night, except to take as long as it takes. 13.6.2005
It's another world.
Make believe is fiction, make believe is not the truth.
Non - fiction is not make believe, non - fiction is the truth.
You don't get what you wish for but you can only hope for what you want.
You can't except what you want to come true.
It's better to create characters out of your head.
Base these characters on real life.
Places can be create out of real life or everything can be made up out of one's head. ( Make believe your in another world.) 14.6.2005
There were days of respect.
There were days when we had bonnie old in wide rain, tied up scarfs and turned in framed glasses.
These old ladies chatted at the bus stops, took up the seats of buses.
Many of them lived next door to one another as they used to talk to another over the fences.
These were times everyone know everyone: now through crime no one knows no one.
Not that there was not crime then but very little was found out.
There again you had to give people respect, even old ladies would gab you by your ears if you disrespected anyone.
They would walk you round and round until they found your family members.
If you were good though they would make you a cup of tea and a piece of cake.
If they didn't know you, they would give you a sweet or two.
No one took rudeness off anyone.
Everyone loved everyone and they would put them right when you did wrong because they wanted children to grow up to be nice and respectable adults. 15.6.2005
Difference worlds.
Whether they knew you or not, you could not get away with anything.
You could not be naughty or rude, very few children grew to be robbers or murderer.
Very few children grew up to harm people in any kind of dangerous ways.
What is wrong in the world today, the government has gone mad?
Everyone knows that change can happen in good and bad ways but our changes are in dangerous ways in the rules of our government.16.6.2005
There were days when we had bonnie old in wide rain, tied up scarfs and turned in framed glasses.
These old ladies chatted at the bus stops, took up the seats of buses.
Many of them lived next door to one another as they used to talk to another over the fences.
These were times everyone know everyone: now through crime no one knows no one.
Not that there was not crime then but very little was found out.
There again you had to give people respect, even old ladies would gab you by your ears if you disrespected anyone.
They would walk you round and round until they found your family members.
If you were good though they would make you a cup of tea and a piece of cake.
If they didn't know you, they would give you a sweet or two.
No one took rudeness off anyone.
Everyone loved everyone and they would put them right when you did wrong because they wanted children to grow up to be nice and respectable adults. 15.6.2005
Difference worlds.
Whether they knew you or not, you could not get away with anything.
You could not be naughty or rude, very few children grew to be robbers or murderer.
Very few children grew up to harm people in any kind of dangerous ways.
What is wrong in the world today, the government has gone mad?
Everyone knows that change can happen in good and bad ways but our changes are in dangerous ways in the rules of our government.16.6.2005
You yourself.
You yourself are alone in the world.
People can tell you what they think of the way you live your life but only you can decide what you want out of life.
Only you can walk out the door, walk down the road and know where to go.
Only you can decide which direction to turn, decide what to do as well as where to go.
It's ups to you to do what's right for you. 17.6.2005
Where do we go?
Where is heaven if there is such a place?
Where do we go when we get there?
What do we see when we get there?
Why be born at all if we can't come back to earth?
What is it like to be in heaven?
Ok I know no one knows the answers to these questions: those questions do go through a lot of our minds.
A lot people say human beings come back as animals and even objects.
Animals could come back as human beings but objects never die because they are already still.
It's all unknown so who knows!
It's hard to say that anyone knows.
If we have these questions inside our heads, why were we born if our questions can't be answered?
Why is there a world?
More to the point why is there us? 18.6.2005
You yourself are alone in the world.
People can tell you what they think of the way you live your life but only you can decide what you want out of life.
Only you can walk out the door, walk down the road and know where to go.
Only you can decide which direction to turn, decide what to do as well as where to go.
It's ups to you to do what's right for you. 17.6.2005
Where do we go?
Where is heaven if there is such a place?
Where do we go when we get there?
What do we see when we get there?
Why be born at all if we can't come back to earth?
What is it like to be in heaven?
Ok I know no one knows the answers to these questions: those questions do go through a lot of our minds.
A lot people say human beings come back as animals and even objects.
Animals could come back as human beings but objects never die because they are already still.
It's all unknown so who knows!
It's hard to say that anyone knows.
If we have these questions inside our heads, why were we born if our questions can't be answered?
Why is there a world?
More to the point why is there us? 18.6.2005
About me.
I can be a very serious person.
I can feel very sad.
I can be a cheerful person.
I can feel very happy.
I lack conditions in myself.
I might make you laugh without myself knowing it.
I might have a sense of humor without knowing I have.
I might click with a joke sometimes but sometimes I may not.
It may well take me a while to get a joke but I may not get it at all.
Sometimes I am more cheerful than other times but I do have the odd moody times.
It depends if I have a good or bad day, which is no more difference to most people. 19.6.2005
British weather.
One day rain, next day shine and another snow.
We do get days where we get four seasons in one day.
Whatever the weather, we never seem to be happy.
It's either too hot, too cold but rarely it's just right.
We can never win the weather game.
Today the seasons are never the same.
In Britain the weather can't make make up it's minds, may be it's like some British people.
Still it would be boring if things and people were all the same. 30.6.2005
Our world.
Today the world is strange.
In some ways we have big changes in our lives.
In other ways we have small changes in our lives.
Some things get better: other things get worse.
In other ways some things never change.
This could depend on when and what way life wants to be cruel and kind to us.
A lot of things are the way they are, we can't do anything about that.
Tonight the bus station is quiet in Wolverhampton, in fact too quiet not many people there.
There was a guy with a bold head smoking his cigarette and drinking a bottle of WKD.
When the bus came he ran up stairs as fast as he could so the bus driver did not see him with a bottle of booze in his hand.10.5.2005
I can be a very serious person.
I can feel very sad.
I can be a cheerful person.
I can feel very happy.
I lack conditions in myself.
I might make you laugh without myself knowing it.
I might have a sense of humor without knowing I have.
I might click with a joke sometimes but sometimes I may not.
It may well take me a while to get a joke but I may not get it at all.
Sometimes I am more cheerful than other times but I do have the odd moody times.
It depends if I have a good or bad day, which is no more difference to most people. 19.6.2005
British weather.
One day rain, next day shine and another snow.
We do get days where we get four seasons in one day.
Whatever the weather, we never seem to be happy.
It's either too hot, too cold but rarely it's just right.
We can never win the weather game.
Today the seasons are never the same.
In Britain the weather can't make make up it's minds, may be it's like some British people.
Still it would be boring if things and people were all the same. 30.6.2005
Our world.
Today the world is strange.
In some ways we have big changes in our lives.
In other ways we have small changes in our lives.
Some things get better: other things get worse.
In other ways some things never change.
This could depend on when and what way life wants to be cruel and kind to us.
A lot of things are the way they are, we can't do anything about that.
Tonight the bus station is quiet in Wolverhampton, in fact too quiet not many people there.
There was a guy with a bold head smoking his cigarette and drinking a bottle of WKD.
When the bus came he ran up stairs as fast as he could so the bus driver did not see him with a bottle of booze in his hand.10.5.2005
To build a story.
To create a human being in it's own character.
This human character needs feelings.
There needs to be an event in a place with atmosphere around the character.
We need adjectives to our readers about our characters, places they go and live. 13.5.2005
This poem is from a teenage love story I wrote many years ago, which has never been know whether it's good enough or not, it's called 'THE BIRD WATCHER WHO SPIES'.
The bird watcher who spies.
Joanne and Dan met at High school in London in 1960.
Dan's friend Lee asked the teacher Mr Johns if he could do a bird project for home work.
Mr Johns did not see why could not do a bird project at the time.
Joanne and Dan met at Saint Jame's park on a Saturday afternoon at 2.00pm.
Lee found Joanne and Dan's private place in the park, without them looking he spied on them with his Dad's binoculars as Joanne was wearing a pink bikini.
Joanne went mad at Lee because he woke Dan up in the park.
On Monday morning , Mr Johns asked Lee for his home work.
Lee gave Mr Johns a piece of paper saying, Pink tit bird.
Mr Johns was not very happy with Lee wasting his time, the rest is in the story.
Mr Johns asked the whole class to look in their books for the Pink tit bird.
Joanne and Dan were very happy with Lee. 15.7.2005
To create a human being in it's own character.
This human character needs feelings.
There needs to be an event in a place with atmosphere around the character.
We need adjectives to our readers about our characters, places they go and live. 13.5.2005
This poem is from a teenage love story I wrote many years ago, which has never been know whether it's good enough or not, it's called 'THE BIRD WATCHER WHO SPIES'.
The bird watcher who spies.
Joanne and Dan met at High school in London in 1960.
Dan's friend Lee asked the teacher Mr Johns if he could do a bird project for home work.
Mr Johns did not see why could not do a bird project at the time.
Joanne and Dan met at Saint Jame's park on a Saturday afternoon at 2.00pm.
Lee found Joanne and Dan's private place in the park, without them looking he spied on them with his Dad's binoculars as Joanne was wearing a pink bikini.
Joanne went mad at Lee because he woke Dan up in the park.
On Monday morning , Mr Johns asked Lee for his home work.
Lee gave Mr Johns a piece of paper saying, Pink tit bird.
Mr Johns was not very happy with Lee wasting his time, the rest is in the story.
Mr Johns asked the whole class to look in their books for the Pink tit bird.
Joanne and Dan were very happy with Lee. 15.7.2005
Why are we ever born?
Why are we are born if we die anyway?
It just seems so unfair if we mostly on this planet to to stuffier every day unhappiness.
No one is saying life is all bad but there is more bad than good so then we question that future that can not be answered.
What can happen to lives of children?
How are children going to grow up?
A lot of people say parents are too blame when they can't keep an eye on children twenty - four hours a day.
No one can tell today who is a good or bad parents because you can't bring them up how the last generation was bough up anyway.
I have no answers to these questions to give.
The law creates crime, either children get hurt from crime or they create crime.
No one is saying that adults don't create crime but you knew of very few children creating crime years ago.
Thanks today's laws, parents won't get any thanks off their children.
What is the future for children?
No one knows and we all dread to think about.
Jobs are hard to find, lots of places closing down.
Education is hard to find with courses slowly cutting back too.
Young people having less things too do, this could make the crime grow.
This could be the future of today's children so what will it be like for tomorrow's children?
If I am wrong, I am sorry but I can't be right all the time. 15.7.2005
I went to bed with the clock as a child.
When I was a little girl, I went to bed with the clock.
I think I loved the clock more than my toys, even if I had the toy clock, I still learned to tell the time at three years old.
12 o, clock was two fingers up the center of the clock.
40 to the hour was 8 to the hour.
Quarter to the hour was 9 to the hour.
10 past the hour was 2 to the hour.
Quarter past the hour was 15 to the hour.
20 past the hour was 4 past the hour.
25 past the hour was 5 past the hour.
30 past the hour was 6 past the hour.
35 past the hour was 7 past the hour
5 to the hour was 11 to the hour.
Why are we are born if we die anyway?
It just seems so unfair if we mostly on this planet to to stuffier every day unhappiness.
No one is saying life is all bad but there is more bad than good so then we question that future that can not be answered.
What can happen to lives of children?
How are children going to grow up?
A lot of people say parents are too blame when they can't keep an eye on children twenty - four hours a day.
No one can tell today who is a good or bad parents because you can't bring them up how the last generation was bough up anyway.
I have no answers to these questions to give.
The law creates crime, either children get hurt from crime or they create crime.
No one is saying that adults don't create crime but you knew of very few children creating crime years ago.
Thanks today's laws, parents won't get any thanks off their children.
What is the future for children?
No one knows and we all dread to think about.
Jobs are hard to find, lots of places closing down.
Education is hard to find with courses slowly cutting back too.
Young people having less things too do, this could make the crime grow.
This could be the future of today's children so what will it be like for tomorrow's children?
If I am wrong, I am sorry but I can't be right all the time. 15.7.2005
I went to bed with the clock as a child.
When I was a little girl, I went to bed with the clock.
I think I loved the clock more than my toys, even if I had the toy clock, I still learned to tell the time at three years old.
12 o, clock was two fingers up the center of the clock.
40 to the hour was 8 to the hour.
Quarter to the hour was 9 to the hour.
10 past the hour was 2 to the hour.
Quarter past the hour was 15 to the hour.
20 past the hour was 4 past the hour.
25 past the hour was 5 past the hour.
30 past the hour was 6 past the hour.
35 past the hour was 7 past the hour
5 to the hour was 11 to the hour.
Even today I love the sound of the ticking clock.
I have a clock on my bedroom, living, kitchen and even on my mobile phone.
The only place there is not a clock is the bathroom but I don't take them to bed with me anymore.
Oh not forgetting my alarm clock when I get the right battery to help the clock wake me up. 16.7.2005
This poem is a message to society to accept people with disabilities as human beings and treat us equal to non - disabled people with the right support.
People with disabilities.
At one time people though people with disabilities were thick.
People though people with disabilities were mad and dangerous.
People though they could frightened people with disabilities because people with disabilities more than likely frightened non - disabled people more.
People with disabilities became strong in ourselves.
All what was wanted for us was the right support.
We now don't feel a lone but we don't want people to feel sorry for us.
There are people worse off than people with disabilities but some disabilities are worse than others.
At one time we were taught to see life in black and white because society did not know any other way.
Now that things have moved on a bit it's a little but not good enough we still have a long way to go which takes time and money.
It can never be a perfect world but it could get better. 17.7.2005
I have a clock on my bedroom, living, kitchen and even on my mobile phone.
The only place there is not a clock is the bathroom but I don't take them to bed with me anymore.
Oh not forgetting my alarm clock when I get the right battery to help the clock wake me up. 16.7.2005
This poem is a message to society to accept people with disabilities as human beings and treat us equal to non - disabled people with the right support.
People with disabilities.
At one time people though people with disabilities were thick.
People though people with disabilities were mad and dangerous.
People though they could frightened people with disabilities because people with disabilities more than likely frightened non - disabled people more.
People with disabilities became strong in ourselves.
All what was wanted for us was the right support.
We now don't feel a lone but we don't want people to feel sorry for us.
There are people worse off than people with disabilities but some disabilities are worse than others.
At one time we were taught to see life in black and white because society did not know any other way.
Now that things have moved on a bit it's a little but not good enough we still have a long way to go which takes time and money.
It can never be a perfect world but it could get better. 17.7.2005
Disability people's ability.
Most of us can paint, others can draw or even do both as artists.
There are people with disabilities who can take pictures.
Some of us are writers in poets, playwright, short story tellers and writers.
There people with disabilities who are novelists.
There are even people with disabilities who can sing.
May be we are slower than other people at our jobs but we can do creative jobs with the right support.
A long time ago people with disabilities used to be disliked.
The reason for this is because the lives of people with disabilities are affected due to their disabilities.
Over the years society has discovered with the right support people with disabilities should get by just the same as people who are non - disabled.
It can be very hard when disabilities are not seen.
Only because a person and walk and talk, it does not mean that they have not got a disability.
It is really up to the people with disabilities to tell people they have disabilities.
People must learn to understand if people disabilities don't anything and you think something is wrong.
Have you ever thought that even now there are people that turn a blind at people with disabilities, people with disabilities may feel scared, embarrassed and even ashamed to say so?
How would you feel if you were us?
We should not be made to feel that way but in some cases of our lives society still see us as hard work and completely useless.
Why don't society look at the strong parts of people with disabilities and give us a chance to bring what comes easy to us to life!
Society should let us believe in ourselves as human beings.
They would not like if people were saying they could not do this, that and other. 18.7.2005
This a poem I think will link to the story 'TALKING TO THE GRAVES.'
Most of us can paint, others can draw or even do both as artists.
There are people with disabilities who can take pictures.
Some of us are writers in poets, playwright, short story tellers and writers.
There people with disabilities who are novelists.
There are even people with disabilities who can sing.
May be we are slower than other people at our jobs but we can do creative jobs with the right support.
A long time ago people with disabilities used to be disliked.
The reason for this is because the lives of people with disabilities are affected due to their disabilities.
Over the years society has discovered with the right support people with disabilities should get by just the same as people who are non - disabled.
It can be very hard when disabilities are not seen.
Only because a person and walk and talk, it does not mean that they have not got a disability.
It is really up to the people with disabilities to tell people they have disabilities.
People must learn to understand if people disabilities don't anything and you think something is wrong.
Have you ever thought that even now there are people that turn a blind at people with disabilities, people with disabilities may feel scared, embarrassed and even ashamed to say so?
How would you feel if you were us?
We should not be made to feel that way but in some cases of our lives society still see us as hard work and completely useless.
Why don't society look at the strong parts of people with disabilities and give us a chance to bring what comes easy to us to life!
Society should let us believe in ourselves as human beings.
They would not like if people were saying they could not do this, that and other. 18.7.2005
This a poem I think will link to the story 'TALKING TO THE GRAVES.'
Walking into a dark hole.
I walked through the dark tunnel, it was like a dark hole.
I was holding my torch, it was a very dusty atmosphere.
I couldn't hardy breathe, there was hardy any air.
I walked around, I don't I could see a thing even with the torch.
I fell over tins, bottles and goodness knows what else.
Somehow I managed to get hold of a rug, then put over me and slept in a load of dirt and dust from the mines.
When I woke up a I saw a man asleep, his face was covered in cuts and goodness knows what.
I felt guilty I must have been in a deep sleep.
Some must have really beat him.
At first he was thanking me for giving him water, then he was in this world of heaven. 23.7.2005
Unknown title.
I know I did not know you.
I am not sure you are real or inside my head.
You are a person waiting to come out of me, I am not sure you are real until I built you up to put in this story.
Are you interested in me, I am talking to you inside your grave.
You are a kind character in this story, you saved disabled people's lives in the Gulf war.
You are a hero who sadly lost your own life.
I had a dream about a character like you, from there having been working on a story.
I know I am prod of that you are my character hero even if you may not be real.
When your life was taken away from you, it still took my life away too even though I did not know you.
I may well be still here but I have nothing to look forward to without you.
What difference does it make with the whole world falling to pieces anyway?
There's risk of shooting in the world without war. 11.8.2005
' TALKING TO THE GRAVES'.
I walked through the dark tunnel, it was like a dark hole.
I was holding my torch, it was a very dusty atmosphere.
I couldn't hardy breathe, there was hardy any air.
I walked around, I don't I could see a thing even with the torch.
I fell over tins, bottles and goodness knows what else.
Somehow I managed to get hold of a rug, then put over me and slept in a load of dirt and dust from the mines.
When I woke up a I saw a man asleep, his face was covered in cuts and goodness knows what.
I felt guilty I must have been in a deep sleep.
Some must have really beat him.
At first he was thanking me for giving him water, then he was in this world of heaven. 23.7.2005
Unknown title.
I know I did not know you.
I am not sure you are real or inside my head.
You are a person waiting to come out of me, I am not sure you are real until I built you up to put in this story.
Are you interested in me, I am talking to you inside your grave.
You are a kind character in this story, you saved disabled people's lives in the Gulf war.
You are a hero who sadly lost your own life.
I had a dream about a character like you, from there having been working on a story.
I know I am prod of that you are my character hero even if you may not be real.
When your life was taken away from you, it still took my life away too even though I did not know you.
I may well be still here but I have nothing to look forward to without you.
What difference does it make with the whole world falling to pieces anyway?
There's risk of shooting in the world without war. 11.8.2005
' TALKING TO THE GRAVES'.
I wish.
I wish I could see your grave to see if you are the person I was told you are.
Your ghost may come to life if there is any such thing.
Would it not be magic if you came alive?
I wonder what and who you could be.
Could you be an animal, object or human being?
Would you stay back with us until you are a great old man?
You could be an old man looking like a young man?
Would it really matter as long as we see you in heaven or and earth one day forever?
What happened to you, if any thing did or are you not real? 12.8.2005
All change.
It does not seem like a long time ago but times have changed like they do.
We all know nothing stays the same.
Very little money kept a family going during in the first and second world war.
Children never had a lot but they were happy with what they had got.
The only sadness there was, was losing the people you loved in the war.
The main people were friends and family.
Children's toys did not cost a lot, we are greedy with money today.
Hide and seek did not cost anything.
Today takes a lot to keep children happy.
A lot of children do not seem to be happy with what they have got.
This generation has a lot to learn.
We do not know we are born. 16.8.2005
I wish I could see your grave to see if you are the person I was told you are.
Your ghost may come to life if there is any such thing.
Would it not be magic if you came alive?
I wonder what and who you could be.
Could you be an animal, object or human being?
Would you stay back with us until you are a great old man?
You could be an old man looking like a young man?
Would it really matter as long as we see you in heaven or and earth one day forever?
What happened to you, if any thing did or are you not real? 12.8.2005
All change.
It does not seem like a long time ago but times have changed like they do.
We all know nothing stays the same.
Very little money kept a family going during in the first and second world war.
Children never had a lot but they were happy with what they had got.
The only sadness there was, was losing the people you loved in the war.
The main people were friends and family.
Children's toys did not cost a lot, we are greedy with money today.
Hide and seek did not cost anything.
Today takes a lot to keep children happy.
A lot of children do not seem to be happy with what they have got.
This generation has a lot to learn.
We do not know we are born. 16.8.2005
Talking to the Graves.
Are you laying down in your coffin?
Is your coffin lid opening?
Is it hot or cold in your coffin or can't you feel it?
Are you reading the news paper?
What did you look like in person, have you turned to skeletion?
Am I just dreaming?
If only I knew your life story, if only I could put you into a fiction story.
You must be up there with your skeletion friends talking about heaven and earth.
I know I can't see you : may be you are able to see me.
May be you were taken away from the earth too soon. 19.8.2005
The story ' Talking to the graves' still goes on.
How unkind life can be.
You should not be inside a coffin, under a grave stone.
You should be with me in the lovely sunshine.
We should in a romantic wood, just you and me.
We should be spending time together on a Sunny afternoon watching the birds sing.
You should not be in heaven, if you are I am too.
I may well be in this unhappy world but only without you.
There's hardy much happiness in the world today.
Now that I am in heaven with you, I know I will be missed by a lot of people on earth but that's just a dream.
I must be on earth because it is cold, there's no joys of spring just cold winter weather. 20.8.2005
Are you laying down in your coffin?
Is your coffin lid opening?
Is it hot or cold in your coffin or can't you feel it?
Are you reading the news paper?
What did you look like in person, have you turned to skeletion?
Am I just dreaming?
If only I knew your life story, if only I could put you into a fiction story.
You must be up there with your skeletion friends talking about heaven and earth.
I know I can't see you : may be you are able to see me.
May be you were taken away from the earth too soon. 19.8.2005
The story ' Talking to the graves' still goes on.
How unkind life can be.
You should not be inside a coffin, under a grave stone.
You should be with me in the lovely sunshine.
We should in a romantic wood, just you and me.
We should be spending time together on a Sunny afternoon watching the birds sing.
You should not be in heaven, if you are I am too.
I may well be in this unhappy world but only without you.
There's hardy much happiness in the world today.
Now that I am in heaven with you, I know I will be missed by a lot of people on earth but that's just a dream.
I must be on earth because it is cold, there's no joys of spring just cold winter weather. 20.8.2005
Why keep it quiet.
There's still things we don't understand.
We can't let it go until we understand our own lives.
People think that we should know what's wrong.
Why do we both feel so down, things are going wrong yet we still love one another.
Why do you care about people think anyway?
Why do you let people get bet ween us.
I am sick and tire of people telling me that you are the wrong person for me, yet it could be true.
I can't help it if I am in love with you.
Yet you tell me that people say I am the wrong person for you, may be it could be true but so what about what people say?
I know people think we are out of our minds.
May be we are not right for one another but it's hard to control love. December 2006
I never know what I want.
I never want to stay in but there are times I don't want to go out and do myself in with how I feel at the moment.
I get so depressed but don't ask me why.
I love been around people and I need something to keep my mind busy.
Like all of us I have good and bad days.
Today there are still too many bad things said about race.
This is society let's us down.
Too much crime in the world.
It's hard to believe happiness in today's world.
There's always been wars around as it is and still is today.
This is why the world depresses me more. December 2006
There's still things we don't understand.
We can't let it go until we understand our own lives.
People think that we should know what's wrong.
Why do we both feel so down, things are going wrong yet we still love one another.
Why do you care about people think anyway?
Why do you let people get bet ween us.
I am sick and tire of people telling me that you are the wrong person for me, yet it could be true.
I can't help it if I am in love with you.
Yet you tell me that people say I am the wrong person for you, may be it could be true but so what about what people say?
I know people think we are out of our minds.
May be we are not right for one another but it's hard to control love. December 2006
I never know what I want.
I never want to stay in but there are times I don't want to go out and do myself in with how I feel at the moment.
I get so depressed but don't ask me why.
I love been around people and I need something to keep my mind busy.
Like all of us I have good and bad days.
Today there are still too many bad things said about race.
This is society let's us down.
Too much crime in the world.
It's hard to believe happiness in today's world.
There's always been wars around as it is and still is today.
This is why the world depresses me more. December 2006
Why do I write sad poems.
Take me like a pinch of salt not too serious.
Poetry is just my way of writing about how I feel from day to day.
Some poems may be happy others may be sad.
I hope one day my poems will get better.
I hope one day I will be happy and not feeling like taking my own life.
I hope one day I will feel strong enough to leave the partner I am with now and love someone who is right for me and who loves me.
I hope to get work one day rather just be stuck where I am now, signing being on benefits is making me depressed and it's breaking me and my partner up but may be it would not be a bad thing.
I don't think black and white all the time, I believe there is a light at the end of the tunnel some way and some how.
I have not got there yet but I know I will one day.
I have fallen down and got back up again before, I will do it again.
Life is not just about me.
I just wish I did not love the wrong mind you who is the right one? December 2006
In a difference world.
It would be lovely to see the angels.
It would be lovely to see the fairies.
Forget the witches may be remember the wizards.
Become the ghost of love. December 2006
Poor times.
Washing lines.
Children dressed in rags begging for money around street condors.
Rats wondering round getting wet in the pouring rain.
People living on bread and water.
Young boys as well as men working down the mines.
Young boys down the chimney sweeps.
Now what is the world coming to with unemployment? December 2006
Take me like a pinch of salt not too serious.
Poetry is just my way of writing about how I feel from day to day.
Some poems may be happy others may be sad.
I hope one day my poems will get better.
I hope one day I will be happy and not feeling like taking my own life.
I hope one day I will feel strong enough to leave the partner I am with now and love someone who is right for me and who loves me.
I hope to get work one day rather just be stuck where I am now, signing being on benefits is making me depressed and it's breaking me and my partner up but may be it would not be a bad thing.
I don't think black and white all the time, I believe there is a light at the end of the tunnel some way and some how.
I have not got there yet but I know I will one day.
I have fallen down and got back up again before, I will do it again.
Life is not just about me.
I just wish I did not love the wrong mind you who is the right one? December 2006
In a difference world.
It would be lovely to see the angels.
It would be lovely to see the fairies.
Forget the witches may be remember the wizards.
Become the ghost of love. December 2006
Poor times.
Washing lines.
Children dressed in rags begging for money around street condors.
Rats wondering round getting wet in the pouring rain.
People living on bread and water.
Young boys as well as men working down the mines.
Young boys down the chimney sweeps.
Now what is the world coming to with unemployment? December 2006
Us
We met one another in our twenties.
We are both in our mid to late thirties now.
I know we have been together on and off.
Who would have thought that we would get back together?
Deep down I did hope but may be I am starting think it was the wrong thing to do.
One is a problem is that feeling called love.
Good, bad, wrong or right, feelings are hard to control.
I still love you now but I am sure you love me too. December 2006
You took my world away.
You left me crying every day and night.
At night I could not sleep.
When I looked through my window, sky was dull and gray without you.
My fears were that you'd never love me anymore.
I kept on hoping that you would love me again.
I was going to tell you that I forgive you for hurting me, how mad am I?
It took four years for us to get back together. December 2006
We met one another in our twenties.
We are both in our mid to late thirties now.
I know we have been together on and off.
Who would have thought that we would get back together?
Deep down I did hope but may be I am starting think it was the wrong thing to do.
One is a problem is that feeling called love.
Good, bad, wrong or right, feelings are hard to control.
I still love you now but I am sure you love me too. December 2006
You took my world away.
You left me crying every day and night.
At night I could not sleep.
When I looked through my window, sky was dull and gray without you.
My fears were that you'd never love me anymore.
I kept on hoping that you would love me again.
I was going to tell you that I forgive you for hurting me, how mad am I?
It took four years for us to get back together. December 2006
The days are long.
It does not matter what time I get up, the days still seem long.
I am sitting by my computer on the internet and writing poetry.
To me the time is click slowly.
Time never seems to end.
When I go to college, the day can take as long and short as it wants to.
When I am at home it feels like a prison cell until the evening time.
It's such a sense of freedom to get out and about, it stops me feeling sorry for myself.
It stops me doing and thinking silly things.
The mind is like a box that you can take the lid of see what's inside.
If it thinks something it should not, crack it like a nut.
It won't hurt, you are just taking control over your own feelings like I should with love.
You are just trying to get yourself to think right when you could either be silly or wrong. December 2006
Romance.
Lighten up my life with a candle light.
Send me flowers and give plenty of power.
Come with me, we will get in the shower for half an hour.
Please be sweet do not be sour.
I love you and you love me.
Is that not enough to see?
I kiss you and you kiss me.
Just may be we can be happy to be.December 2006
Everyday feelings.
Some days I could be in a hot mood.
Other days I could be in a cold mood.
Friday I felt tearful, Saturday I felt sad, anger and tears .
Sunday my feelings kept on changing from happy to sad, this happen all week long.
Tomorrow is just another day. December 2006
It does not matter what time I get up, the days still seem long.
I am sitting by my computer on the internet and writing poetry.
To me the time is click slowly.
Time never seems to end.
When I go to college, the day can take as long and short as it wants to.
When I am at home it feels like a prison cell until the evening time.
It's such a sense of freedom to get out and about, it stops me feeling sorry for myself.
It stops me doing and thinking silly things.
The mind is like a box that you can take the lid of see what's inside.
If it thinks something it should not, crack it like a nut.
It won't hurt, you are just taking control over your own feelings like I should with love.
You are just trying to get yourself to think right when you could either be silly or wrong. December 2006
Romance.
Lighten up my life with a candle light.
Send me flowers and give plenty of power.
Come with me, we will get in the shower for half an hour.
Please be sweet do not be sour.
I love you and you love me.
Is that not enough to see?
I kiss you and you kiss me.
Just may be we can be happy to be.December 2006
Everyday feelings.
Some days I could be in a hot mood.
Other days I could be in a cold mood.
Friday I felt tearful, Saturday I felt sad, anger and tears .
Sunday my feelings kept on changing from happy to sad, this happen all week long.
Tomorrow is just another day. December 2006
I wish I was a difference kind of person.
I wish I could be a writer but that could be wishful thinking.
I wish I could live with my boyfriend without losing my benefits but that could be wishful thinking.
Everyone hates paying tax but life goes on, without work there's no life at all.
Why should I be any special to anyone else but why should I be trapped to benefits?
All I wish for is a peaceful life, then I wish to die old, otherwise I wish to die young if life is not worth living.
Other than a flat I have a good education but what's the point of that if there's no job in the end.
Oh I just want to work part time even if it's a little bit of pocket money.
Depression has or is taking over my life. December 2006
Where am I going?
It seems like a very long walk.
It's so dark, it seems very far away.
What will I see when I get to the end?
I am so scared, I just want to stop dead.
Will I stay standing up or will I full down?
There's no saying when and where it will end if it ever will.
Will I break or mend?
I will still love you, can't you see that?
Just tell me if you want to be free.
I will live in sadness if I have to.
May be I will be happy and one day I may not love you anymore.
There's happiness and unhappiness but not everyone is lucky enough to love until death. December 2006
How long?
How long and high is it to get to the sky?
When I get to the sky I will fly when I die.
I will like a butterfly and bird in the sky.
I will fly like an angel with wings then lye.
I will fly like a fairy with wings then cry. December 2006
I wish I could be a writer but that could be wishful thinking.
I wish I could live with my boyfriend without losing my benefits but that could be wishful thinking.
Everyone hates paying tax but life goes on, without work there's no life at all.
Why should I be any special to anyone else but why should I be trapped to benefits?
All I wish for is a peaceful life, then I wish to die old, otherwise I wish to die young if life is not worth living.
Other than a flat I have a good education but what's the point of that if there's no job in the end.
Oh I just want to work part time even if it's a little bit of pocket money.
Depression has or is taking over my life. December 2006
Where am I going?
It seems like a very long walk.
It's so dark, it seems very far away.
What will I see when I get to the end?
I am so scared, I just want to stop dead.
Will I stay standing up or will I full down?
There's no saying when and where it will end if it ever will.
Will I break or mend?
I will still love you, can't you see that?
Just tell me if you want to be free.
I will live in sadness if I have to.
May be I will be happy and one day I may not love you anymore.
There's happiness and unhappiness but not everyone is lucky enough to love until death. December 2006
How long?
How long and high is it to get to the sky?
When I get to the sky I will fly when I die.
I will like a butterfly and bird in the sky.
I will fly like an angel with wings then lye.
I will fly like a fairy with wings then cry. December 2006
Please never change.
I love you because you are you to me.
I hope that's the way to be.
I hope this will never change for you and me. December 2006
On my own.
I am in my flat.
The clock is clicking slowly.
I can't wait to walk out the door.
I will soon be with my boyfriend or and my best friend.
Come home at night, I am back looking at the four walls.
I stop up listening to my music and I put my computer on then time for bed.
The same stars again tomorrow.December 2006
Love.
What is love all about?
Look for it you can't find it.
Don't look for it, it's right there.
Once you feel love for someone and they do for you, it's hard to control.
It can go wrong and end in tears but still hard to control.
It can take long time to move on and love someone else.
You have to dust yourself up and start all over again.
It can become a risk loving, it can be very much be about trust.
You just take chances if it does not work keep moving on what will be will be.
Whatever good chance you get take it, those good chances don't have often. December 2006
I love you because you are you to me.
I hope that's the way to be.
I hope this will never change for you and me. December 2006
On my own.
I am in my flat.
The clock is clicking slowly.
I can't wait to walk out the door.
I will soon be with my boyfriend or and my best friend.
Come home at night, I am back looking at the four walls.
I stop up listening to my music and I put my computer on then time for bed.
The same stars again tomorrow.December 2006
Love.
What is love all about?
Look for it you can't find it.
Don't look for it, it's right there.
Once you feel love for someone and they do for you, it's hard to control.
It can go wrong and end in tears but still hard to control.
It can take long time to move on and love someone else.
You have to dust yourself up and start all over again.
It can become a risk loving, it can be very much be about trust.
You just take chances if it does not work keep moving on what will be will be.
Whatever good chance you get take it, those good chances don't have often. December 2006
For life to be worth living.
Forget the rain and the clouds.
Forget the frost, fog, sleet and snow.
What about the green grass covered in daffodils?
What about a few green leaves on the trees?
What about being warm instead of cold?
What about the bright yellow sun in the deep blue sky?
If that was the case, may be we will be less depressed.
When Christmas is here life is a mess and come January, many people are in debt.
That's when life is not at it's best. December 2006
Say goodbye to life.
I say good bye to the bad things in life.
Take the easy way out, go to heaven.
I say hello to the good things in life, leave earth.
What here for us all?
Nothing but bad news.
Too much crime and the list goes on.
Too many companies closing down, there's nothing for young people anymore.
I find it hard to see the good life.
Other than my boyfriend's friends, family and education that's my life.
Society is depressing but may be there is a way forward one day. December 2006
I don't think I have anything to get upset about.
Some how I feel low but I wish I knew the reason why.
I also feel very upset and angry.
I feel as if I don't want to live anymore.
I might be just depressed.
Whatever it is I will find a way to get over it but I am not sure how to other than writing poetry.
I feel as if I want to disappear into another world.
I just want to die and never come back.
I don't want help.
I just want to cope on my own.
I wish I could be happy again.
It's hard to see what will happen next. December 2006
Forget the rain and the clouds.
Forget the frost, fog, sleet and snow.
What about the green grass covered in daffodils?
What about a few green leaves on the trees?
What about being warm instead of cold?
What about the bright yellow sun in the deep blue sky?
If that was the case, may be we will be less depressed.
When Christmas is here life is a mess and come January, many people are in debt.
That's when life is not at it's best. December 2006
Say goodbye to life.
I say good bye to the bad things in life.
Take the easy way out, go to heaven.
I say hello to the good things in life, leave earth.
What here for us all?
Nothing but bad news.
Too much crime and the list goes on.
Too many companies closing down, there's nothing for young people anymore.
I find it hard to see the good life.
Other than my boyfriend's friends, family and education that's my life.
Society is depressing but may be there is a way forward one day. December 2006
I don't think I have anything to get upset about.
Some how I feel low but I wish I knew the reason why.
I also feel very upset and angry.
I feel as if I don't want to live anymore.
I might be just depressed.
Whatever it is I will find a way to get over it but I am not sure how to other than writing poetry.
I feel as if I want to disappear into another world.
I just want to die and never come back.
I don't want help.
I just want to cope on my own.
I wish I could be happy again.
It's hard to see what will happen next. December 2006
How do we explain?
People say it's all in our minds.
We should snap out of it.
We would if we were not be feeling like we do.
Yes I have a reason to give, the world, government and society.
There have many times I felt low for no reason, that's the same for other people too.
I have cried not knowing I have been crying for.
In the end I have felt foolish and guilty but then when tears catch your eyes that's what you can't control. December 2006
Why do I feel?
Why do I feel I don't want to eat a lot?
Why do I feel as if I don't want to go to bed?
Why do I wake up just any time when I do sleep.
I have no job and not much money and no where to go other to see the man I love.
If I can just about get some kind of work and a little pay, I'd be ok.
I am still on earth, I don't think I will be happy until the day I die.
I want die young and in peace. December 2006
What's the matter with me?
I feel ashamed that I feel sad.
I think I have got more in life than I know about.
I have a boyfriend, family and friends.
I have a good education, I am not bullied like I was in school.
I know life does not live around me but most teenagers and people in their twenties don't have respect these days.
Manners have gone through the window.
People are getting off buses pushing into people.
No one seems to be polite anymore.
The government has given us far too many rules to cope with.
The only thing with my life is being disabled and wanting a job. December 2006
People say it's all in our minds.
We should snap out of it.
We would if we were not be feeling like we do.
Yes I have a reason to give, the world, government and society.
There have many times I felt low for no reason, that's the same for other people too.
I have cried not knowing I have been crying for.
In the end I have felt foolish and guilty but then when tears catch your eyes that's what you can't control. December 2006
Why do I feel?
Why do I feel I don't want to eat a lot?
Why do I feel as if I don't want to go to bed?
Why do I wake up just any time when I do sleep.
I have no job and not much money and no where to go other to see the man I love.
If I can just about get some kind of work and a little pay, I'd be ok.
I am still on earth, I don't think I will be happy until the day I die.
I want die young and in peace. December 2006
What's the matter with me?
I feel ashamed that I feel sad.
I think I have got more in life than I know about.
I have a boyfriend, family and friends.
I have a good education, I am not bullied like I was in school.
I know life does not live around me but most teenagers and people in their twenties don't have respect these days.
Manners have gone through the window.
People are getting off buses pushing into people.
No one seems to be polite anymore.
The government has given us far too many rules to cope with.
The only thing with my life is being disabled and wanting a job. December 2006
I wish there was a way to disappear.
When I am walking outside I wish there were some magic powers to make me disappear up in heaven if there is any such name and place.
Please take me away from this depressing earth?
I would have wings on my arms and flippers on my feet, then up and away I would go.
What will be there for me? who knows?
I want to run away and hide from the world
I want to say goodbye to earth.
I want to run away from the same old things everyday.
Find a place to hide and die.
If I carry on living in this world I won't be happy because it is depressing towards everyone. December 2006.
It drives me mad.
I look at the tall block of flats, I picture myself flying in the air.
If I am inside a high rise flat, the ground seems a long way down.
If I am waiting up stairs on the bus as the bus moves, I keep think I am going to fall down.
I don't know why I think I am falling down as I am going up.
The end of my life seems so far away, how much longer do I have to stay, I can't stand the pain as longer?
When I am going down, I know if I fall, I won't fall up, I will fall down. December 2006
December 2006
When I feel down.
When I feel down, I can't be bothered with anything at all.
Whether there is something the matter with me or not.
I just want to get away from the four walls.
The end of my life seems so far away, how much longer do I have to stay?
I want to live to be old but only when I feel happy again. December 2006
When I am walking outside I wish there were some magic powers to make me disappear up in heaven if there is any such name and place.
Please take me away from this depressing earth?
I would have wings on my arms and flippers on my feet, then up and away I would go.
What will be there for me? who knows?
I want to run away and hide from the world
I want to say goodbye to earth.
I want to run away from the same old things everyday.
Find a place to hide and die.
If I carry on living in this world I won't be happy because it is depressing towards everyone. December 2006.
It drives me mad.
I look at the tall block of flats, I picture myself flying in the air.
If I am inside a high rise flat, the ground seems a long way down.
If I am waiting up stairs on the bus as the bus moves, I keep think I am going to fall down.
I don't know why I think I am falling down as I am going up.
The end of my life seems so far away, how much longer do I have to stay, I can't stand the pain as longer?
When I am going down, I know if I fall, I won't fall up, I will fall down. December 2006
December 2006
When I feel down.
When I feel down, I can't be bothered with anything at all.
Whether there is something the matter with me or not.
I just want to get away from the four walls.
The end of my life seems so far away, how much longer do I have to stay?
I want to live to be old but only when I feel happy again. December 2006
Winter time.
Look at the cold, dull and gray skies that depresses us more!
When the day turns to night gray turns to black.
When I go out it's a long way to walk through those block of flats to the bus stop.
Those flats seem a long way when it's dark when I come back home at night.
There are very few street lights as you walk through the dark alleys where you turn right.December 2006
It feels as if it's there for life.
Everyone has good and bad days.
We all can feel down in the dumps at anytime.
We can feel happy anytime but at the moment I am feeling up and down through the day like most people with depression.
A lot of people would say it's all in people's head but you only have to have kind of tragedy and we are out of our minds.
I don't think people are surprised by that because stress kills more than thousands in the world. December 2006
Where do I go next?
The shy is blue and the sun is yellow.
Sand is yellow and the sea is blue too.
I will feel the air coming down to feet as the tide pushes me in the sea.
I will see angels under my feet as I fly like a bird.
I will haunt earth as an angel, I will keep earth safe. December 2006.
It won't be: it will be.
It won't be fires.
It won't be knives.
It will be tablets, pills and water.
When I get up there, I will be a fairy with lots of frills. December 2006.
Look at the cold, dull and gray skies that depresses us more!
When the day turns to night gray turns to black.
When I go out it's a long way to walk through those block of flats to the bus stop.
Those flats seem a long way when it's dark when I come back home at night.
There are very few street lights as you walk through the dark alleys where you turn right.December 2006
It feels as if it's there for life.
Everyone has good and bad days.
We all can feel down in the dumps at anytime.
We can feel happy anytime but at the moment I am feeling up and down through the day like most people with depression.
A lot of people would say it's all in people's head but you only have to have kind of tragedy and we are out of our minds.
I don't think people are surprised by that because stress kills more than thousands in the world. December 2006
Where do I go next?
The shy is blue and the sun is yellow.
Sand is yellow and the sea is blue too.
I will feel the air coming down to feet as the tide pushes me in the sea.
I will see angels under my feet as I fly like a bird.
I will haunt earth as an angel, I will keep earth safe. December 2006.
It won't be: it will be.
It won't be fires.
It won't be knives.
It will be tablets, pills and water.
When I get up there, I will be a fairy with lots of frills. December 2006.
I would love.
You just don't show love towards me anymore.
Never mind I get paid tomorrow as you seem to want to rid of me.
I may have enough money to buy myself a beer tomorrow night.
I hope to get a job next year and may be a bit of cash one day. December 2006.
If I end my time.
I don't like heights.
I don't like knives.
I like water but not tablets or pill but less painful way to die.
I don't mind what happens to my body as long as I am in peace not pain. December 2006.
You just don't show love towards me anymore.
Never mind I get paid tomorrow as you seem to want to rid of me.
I may have enough money to buy myself a beer tomorrow night.
I hope to get a job next year and may be a bit of cash one day. December 2006.
If I end my time.
I don't like heights.
I don't like knives.
I like water but not tablets or pill but less painful way to die.
I don't mind what happens to my body as long as I am in peace not pain. December 2006.
It's so easy to take it out on other people.
Something without ever knowing, you snap and hurt someone's feelings.
You know afterward you feel bad about what you have said and done.
You just want to break down and cry.
You don't want to live you want to die.
The guilt cuts you up like a knife.
I am just going out of my mind. December 2006
It's too much.
There is nowhere to run and hide from my feelings of love.
Life is hard work for us all at times.
Don't ask me why that is because I don't know.
Sometimes I feel down for silly reasons.
There was a time people thought you were mad if you were down for no reason, I have lived in those time.
Even on happy days I can hide the sadness yet on sad days I can't.
You want to put things behind yourself but in most of us it's hard to do.
I mainly get depressed when I worry about thing which could be silly things.
I know what a lot of people would say is worrying gives you an early grave, may be that's what is happening to me because I can't help the way I am.
When that happens I act as if it's the end of the world, I have always been like it's part of my disability I was told.December 2006
I want to leave earth before I am 40.
I hate the thought of having curly gray hair, walking stick and frame.
I don't want to line up for my pension money, I want to be gone long before I get to that age.
I don't want to end up in a old people's home I sooner be gone well before then.
I want to leave the world as young as possible.
The thought of going through the change scars me. December 2006
Something without ever knowing, you snap and hurt someone's feelings.
You know afterward you feel bad about what you have said and done.
You just want to break down and cry.
You don't want to live you want to die.
The guilt cuts you up like a knife.
I am just going out of my mind. December 2006
It's too much.
There is nowhere to run and hide from my feelings of love.
Life is hard work for us all at times.
Don't ask me why that is because I don't know.
Sometimes I feel down for silly reasons.
There was a time people thought you were mad if you were down for no reason, I have lived in those time.
Even on happy days I can hide the sadness yet on sad days I can't.
You want to put things behind yourself but in most of us it's hard to do.
I mainly get depressed when I worry about thing which could be silly things.
I know what a lot of people would say is worrying gives you an early grave, may be that's what is happening to me because I can't help the way I am.
When that happens I act as if it's the end of the world, I have always been like it's part of my disability I was told.December 2006
I want to leave earth before I am 40.
I hate the thought of having curly gray hair, walking stick and frame.
I don't want to line up for my pension money, I want to be gone long before I get to that age.
I don't want to end up in a old people's home I sooner be gone well before then.
I want to leave the world as young as possible.
The thought of going through the change scars me. December 2006
Why?
Why, if life can't be that bad why does it feel that way?
When you feel down, it does not always happen with a reason.
I keep wanting to close myself up so I don't depress people even though I am but I find it hard to control.
Writing poetry is the only thing that's keeping me going so don't take what I say too much to heart, take it like a pinch of salt.
I can understand that I not get or any of you reading this work but I need to get these things off my chest which is hard to do without putting on people.
I am sorry, I will just say nothing one day so people don't know.I don't feel the same person as I was before. December 2006.
Crying and tears.
What has causes a lot of us to cry for no reason?
Who know why?
I don't know myself so no one has to know the answer to that question.
Why do a lot of us get down for no reason?
That's no one's guess.
Why do we feel it's the end of the world?
Why cry over silly things?
What is life really about?
Goodness knows.
How can some people just sail through life yet others just crack up?
I think if you believe your a strong person then you take life as it comes.
I think I am stronger than I think but I think I am strong enough to think I am strong.
Yet for some reason I am one of the worse worriers.
Whether something is on my mind or not, if I feel tears it comes out.
I just feel silly.
Should I feel silly or not?
That's another question hard to answer. December 2006
Why, if life can't be that bad why does it feel that way?
When you feel down, it does not always happen with a reason.
I keep wanting to close myself up so I don't depress people even though I am but I find it hard to control.
Writing poetry is the only thing that's keeping me going so don't take what I say too much to heart, take it like a pinch of salt.
I can understand that I not get or any of you reading this work but I need to get these things off my chest which is hard to do without putting on people.
I am sorry, I will just say nothing one day so people don't know.I don't feel the same person as I was before. December 2006.
Crying and tears.
What has causes a lot of us to cry for no reason?
Who know why?
I don't know myself so no one has to know the answer to that question.
Why do a lot of us get down for no reason?
That's no one's guess.
Why do we feel it's the end of the world?
Why cry over silly things?
What is life really about?
Goodness knows.
How can some people just sail through life yet others just crack up?
I think if you believe your a strong person then you take life as it comes.
I think I am stronger than I think but I think I am strong enough to think I am strong.
Yet for some reason I am one of the worse worriers.
Whether something is on my mind or not, if I feel tears it comes out.
I just feel silly.
Should I feel silly or not?
That's another question hard to answer. December 2006
I want to get out of here.
May be no one knows how I feel.
I feel like walking away from Wolverhampton before my life ends.
I feel moody and depressed.
I feel I can't wait to get out of here.
I don't want to travel the world, I want to get out of it.
I don't know how to feel good anymore, I don't think I ever did.
I don't want help, I just want to leave the earth, I will never be happy until I do.
I don't know the first thing to do to change my mind about how I feel.
I only wish I did not feel this way.
I just feel so confused as if the world is too much for me. December 2006
One day everything will come to an end.
We all hate sadness but we all like the truth.
There are times that sad things are the truth and it hurts.
Humans and animals live and die.
Flowers and plants die.
Nothing lasts forever so why are we here in the first place?
We all go through happiness as well as sadness.
How confusing the reasons are for us being on earth in the first place.
It can't be anymore confusing than it already is but how boring it would be if it just worked one way.
You just can't have it good all the time.
You just can't have it bad all the time.
It all ends in the end.
All good things come to an end. December 2006
May be no one knows how I feel.
I feel like walking away from Wolverhampton before my life ends.
I feel moody and depressed.
I feel I can't wait to get out of here.
I don't want to travel the world, I want to get out of it.
I don't know how to feel good anymore, I don't think I ever did.
I don't want help, I just want to leave the earth, I will never be happy until I do.
I don't know the first thing to do to change my mind about how I feel.
I only wish I did not feel this way.
I just feel so confused as if the world is too much for me. December 2006
One day everything will come to an end.
We all hate sadness but we all like the truth.
There are times that sad things are the truth and it hurts.
Humans and animals live and die.
Flowers and plants die.
Nothing lasts forever so why are we here in the first place?
We all go through happiness as well as sadness.
How confusing the reasons are for us being on earth in the first place.
It can't be anymore confusing than it already is but how boring it would be if it just worked one way.
You just can't have it good all the time.
You just can't have it bad all the time.
It all ends in the end.
All good things come to an end. December 2006
Drinking.
Drink can cause people to break down relationships.
Drink can cause family break downs.
Death can drive people to drink.
Drunk drivers are danger to themselves and other people.
Drink can drive people to death whether they drink heavy or not.
My world was empty without you so I wanted to leave the world without you.
I couldn't stand anymore, I tried to leave the world before.
I did not feel strong enough to cope with the pain so here I go again.
I almost drank myself to death.
I ate less and less and I became light headed.
I still forgive you but I don't forget what happened, that's only because I love you.
I understand the past is the past but I can't but talk about every now and then because you hurt me very badly.
I am willing to put behind now but you will have no more chances if you hurt me again. December 2006
What is life like now.
I am sitting in my living room looking through my window, the sky is half blue and half white.
It's an early Monday afternoon but it is a Bank holiday that does not feel like a Bank holiday.
There's hardy anyone about outside.
How strange is that?
You may say why don't you get out?
I will tonight.
I have hardy any money to spend.
I am not asking for the world but it would be nice to have a little bit more money in my pocket.
Jobs are not easy to find these days.
There are far too many people unemployed, which causes people to go through depression.
No spaces, not enough exams, too many exams, not enough training, too much training, age, disability, place closing down and many more reasons. December 2006
Drink can cause people to break down relationships.
Drink can cause family break downs.
Death can drive people to drink.
Drunk drivers are danger to themselves and other people.
Drink can drive people to death whether they drink heavy or not.
My world was empty without you so I wanted to leave the world without you.
I couldn't stand anymore, I tried to leave the world before.
I did not feel strong enough to cope with the pain so here I go again.
I almost drank myself to death.
I ate less and less and I became light headed.
I still forgive you but I don't forget what happened, that's only because I love you.
I understand the past is the past but I can't but talk about every now and then because you hurt me very badly.
I am willing to put behind now but you will have no more chances if you hurt me again. December 2006
What is life like now.
I am sitting in my living room looking through my window, the sky is half blue and half white.
It's an early Monday afternoon but it is a Bank holiday that does not feel like a Bank holiday.
There's hardy anyone about outside.
How strange is that?
You may say why don't you get out?
I will tonight.
I have hardy any money to spend.
I am not asking for the world but it would be nice to have a little bit more money in my pocket.
Jobs are not easy to find these days.
There are far too many people unemployed, which causes people to go through depression.
No spaces, not enough exams, too many exams, not enough training, too much training, age, disability, place closing down and many more reasons. December 2006
I can't see.
I can't see any further than my nose.
I think it's a big long road.
I can't take that big long road, it's far too far for me to walk to see what is there.
I am just scared what will happen when I get there.
I want to get of here before I get there, I can't see myself getting to the end of the road.
so high, when I look up I feel as if I want to fly.
Yet I would be too scared to fly going up high.
I don't know if I would feel strong enough to come back down again.
I don't like the thought of going up high unless I am in an plane.
I don't like seeing thought.
I don't know what I will see when I get there.
Will I go left, right or straight on?
I don't know where to turn.
I am too scared to try so I want to cruel into a hole to die.
The sky seems high rise flats by where I live.
I keep thinking that someone is going to fall out of them.
I keep thinking that they are all going to fall down. December 2006
I can't see any further than my nose.
I think it's a big long road.
I can't take that big long road, it's far too far for me to walk to see what is there.
I am just scared what will happen when I get there.
I want to get of here before I get there, I can't see myself getting to the end of the road.
so high, when I look up I feel as if I want to fly.
Yet I would be too scared to fly going up high.
I don't know if I would feel strong enough to come back down again.
I don't like the thought of going up high unless I am in an plane.
I don't like seeing thought.
I don't know what I will see when I get there.
Will I go left, right or straight on?
I don't know where to turn.
I am too scared to try so I want to cruel into a hole to die.
The sky seems high rise flats by where I live.
I keep thinking that someone is going to fall out of them.
I keep thinking that they are all going to fall down. December 2006
A lot of people say.
A lot of people find and see poetry boring.
Poetry is only boring if the poet makes it boring.
Mind you I feel bad to say that I have a over loaded mind and it just gets down on paper.
A lot of us poets may write words of sadness but words of truth.
I write words of happiness and sadness.
Most words of happiness is the truth but very little.
When it comes to that it makes us wonder why we are here in the first place.
Most poets, people who write plays, People who write novels and other writers find it hard to let their feeling out in any other way other than write.
Writing is not always easy to put into words but then people can't answer you back.
It does not mean you can't be a writer if you find words hard to write on paper, just say what's going through your mind and write it.
Writing is from the mind not art.
Everyone has a book in them because we live life.
As long as you have research to work on when you have a writer's block.
If your mind is full ideas, write them down.
You can keep at it until you get there, I am still working on it now.
I have been writing for 13 years.
Some people express themselves in painting and drawing, which I do sometimes, that's art. December 2006
The great thing about poetry.
The great thing about poetry is that you can say what you mean.
You can also say what you don't mean as long as you tell your readers you don't mean it.
Mostly you can cay how you feel.
Poets should make things understood so readers can read bet ween the lines what the poets say and mean.
Sometimes somethings are hard to think about when it comes to thinking about a subject.
Think about what to write : what not to write.
Learn off other poets but not too much, be yourself because we all live so we have a book inside ourselves. December 2006.
A lot of people find and see poetry boring.
Poetry is only boring if the poet makes it boring.
Mind you I feel bad to say that I have a over loaded mind and it just gets down on paper.
A lot of us poets may write words of sadness but words of truth.
I write words of happiness and sadness.
Most words of happiness is the truth but very little.
When it comes to that it makes us wonder why we are here in the first place.
Most poets, people who write plays, People who write novels and other writers find it hard to let their feeling out in any other way other than write.
Writing is not always easy to put into words but then people can't answer you back.
It does not mean you can't be a writer if you find words hard to write on paper, just say what's going through your mind and write it.
Writing is from the mind not art.
Everyone has a book in them because we live life.
As long as you have research to work on when you have a writer's block.
If your mind is full ideas, write them down.
You can keep at it until you get there, I am still working on it now.
I have been writing for 13 years.
Some people express themselves in painting and drawing, which I do sometimes, that's art. December 2006
The great thing about poetry.
The great thing about poetry is that you can say what you mean.
You can also say what you don't mean as long as you tell your readers you don't mean it.
Mostly you can cay how you feel.
Poets should make things understood so readers can read bet ween the lines what the poets say and mean.
Sometimes somethings are hard to think about when it comes to thinking about a subject.
Think about what to write : what not to write.
Learn off other poets but not too much, be yourself because we all live so we have a book inside ourselves. December 2006.
I don't want to leave you.
You are not the problem, it's me.
I only feel better when I am with you.
You might be the only one keeping me going but I don't feel I can.
The world seems big and larger than life to me, it all seems so far away.
I still have so long to live it scars me.
I don't like it this way, the fear of having walking sticks and frames.December 2006
There are good times and bad.
Today I don't feel too bad.
Tomorrow I may feel down.
Sorry, I must say I will never know.
The good thing is that I am eating a meal, I can smell cottage pie and veg.
When I am low, I don't eat that much.
It makes a big difference when I see people.
I saw my best friend today that's good.
I just wish I would not take my stress out on my lover, he is also my best friend.
May be when I get work one day, I can save up for getting my work published and new clothes.
I will still enjoy my social life all the same.
I can't have everything.
We want difference things but can't have everything as we haven't got it. December 2006
You are not the problem, it's me.
I only feel better when I am with you.
You might be the only one keeping me going but I don't feel I can.
The world seems big and larger than life to me, it all seems so far away.
I still have so long to live it scars me.
I don't like it this way, the fear of having walking sticks and frames.December 2006
There are good times and bad.
Today I don't feel too bad.
Tomorrow I may feel down.
Sorry, I must say I will never know.
The good thing is that I am eating a meal, I can smell cottage pie and veg.
When I am low, I don't eat that much.
It makes a big difference when I see people.
I saw my best friend today that's good.
I just wish I would not take my stress out on my lover, he is also my best friend.
May be when I get work one day, I can save up for getting my work published and new clothes.
I will still enjoy my social life all the same.
I can't have everything.
We want difference things but can't have everything as we haven't got it. December 2006
Mixed feelings, mixed thoughts and mixed life. (Strange poem.)
It's funny to think I am sitting in The 'GOOSE IN THE CITY ' tonight in Wolverhampton in my home town.
England is playing Crocrasa.
I don't like football but every time I seem to read my book, England seems to score.
I wonder why that is, only that my book is called 'A BOX OF TRICKS' by Jeff Phelps.
It's also strange to think I can hear more men cheering.
Even in this day and age very few women cheered the football match.
I don't want to be someone's Mother or daughter, I want to be someone's lover.
Now end result for England is 5 - 1. 9.9.2009
Same time and same place.
I am sitting in a pub in New Brighton on a warm September sunny day.
I look through the window and sadly see that I am not in New Brighton, I am in dirty Wolverhampton.
It seems very strange to think I went to a writer's group in July, I met the writer Jeff Phelps of ' A BOX OF TRICKS.'
So many things tend to be in common with that book and some of my Father's life.
My Dad used to live in New Brighten in the sixties, this book was written about the same place and the same time, the mods and the rockers.
Sooner my Dad left New Brighten he met my Mother in Wolverhampton where he was born himself.
There are things likes Bowling alleys in New Brighten but my parents met in Bowling alley in Wolverhampton.
Just before I was born, my parents parted, my Dad lived over South London and I lived with my Mother in Wolverhampton.
Apart from when I was just born, I did not see my Dad until I was twenty - one years old when he came back to Wolverhampton to live.
The reasons for me not seeing my Father until I was twenty - one is a very long story.
I would have loved to have spend my childhood in New Brighten with my Dad, near the seafront, fish and chips.
I had traveled round myself a bit to Wales and Shropshire for a number years in my late teens and early twenties . 9.9.2009.
It's funny to think I am sitting in The 'GOOSE IN THE CITY ' tonight in Wolverhampton in my home town.
England is playing Crocrasa.
I don't like football but every time I seem to read my book, England seems to score.
I wonder why that is, only that my book is called 'A BOX OF TRICKS' by Jeff Phelps.
It's also strange to think I can hear more men cheering.
Even in this day and age very few women cheered the football match.
I don't want to be someone's Mother or daughter, I want to be someone's lover.
Now end result for England is 5 - 1. 9.9.2009
Same time and same place.
I am sitting in a pub in New Brighton on a warm September sunny day.
I look through the window and sadly see that I am not in New Brighton, I am in dirty Wolverhampton.
It seems very strange to think I went to a writer's group in July, I met the writer Jeff Phelps of ' A BOX OF TRICKS.'
So many things tend to be in common with that book and some of my Father's life.
My Dad used to live in New Brighten in the sixties, this book was written about the same place and the same time, the mods and the rockers.
Sooner my Dad left New Brighten he met my Mother in Wolverhampton where he was born himself.
There are things likes Bowling alleys in New Brighten but my parents met in Bowling alley in Wolverhampton.
Just before I was born, my parents parted, my Dad lived over South London and I lived with my Mother in Wolverhampton.
Apart from when I was just born, I did not see my Dad until I was twenty - one years old when he came back to Wolverhampton to live.
The reasons for me not seeing my Father until I was twenty - one is a very long story.
I would have loved to have spend my childhood in New Brighten with my Dad, near the seafront, fish and chips.
I had traveled round myself a bit to Wales and Shropshire for a number years in my late teens and early twenties . 9.9.2009.
Monday, 29 June 2009
You are our loving friends.
You are our loving friends.
We can't borrow you.
We can't buy or sell you.
We can't fire you.
We can't do much without you.
We can have fun with you.
We can fool around with you.
We can talk to you.
We can do a lot with you.
We will always be around you.
We hope you will be around us.
Whenever you want us we will be there.
When you don't want us, we won't bother you anywhere.
You may think sometimes that you don't have friends but we and other friends are around you are place some where. written 1998 - 1999.
Every girls dream and nightmare.
It's every girl's dream and nightmare to become a bride.
Not every girl is lucky to met a man of her kind.
Not every girl meets her prince charming the love of her life.
When becoming a man's wife it can be a story of a woman's life.
The amount of years good girls have to wait to be a gentleman's wife.
Having been a gentleman's wife it is not what we think might.
Some days can be a rather unhappy site to be a man's wife.
A wife might end up blowing into her kite.
Girls would you agree that a lot of men can be mites. Written 1997 - 2000
I love you Antonio my longest lasted laddie.
I love you Antonio my longest lasted laddie.
Why did you you go off with another lassie?
You know I love you so madly and sadly.
Now I will never ever have another laddie.
You broken my heart you mean Romano.
I fell in love with you so madly, gladly and sadly Antonio.
You are such a baddie but I love you.
I must be blind not to know that you'd treat me unkind.
Don't you have any love, care understanding on your mind?
I so very much wanted to be your bride so I must get that out of my mind. Written 1996 to 1997.
We can't borrow you.
We can't buy or sell you.
We can't fire you.
We can't do much without you.
We can have fun with you.
We can fool around with you.
We can talk to you.
We can do a lot with you.
We will always be around you.
We hope you will be around us.
Whenever you want us we will be there.
When you don't want us, we won't bother you anywhere.
You may think sometimes that you don't have friends but we and other friends are around you are place some where. written 1998 - 1999.
Every girls dream and nightmare.
It's every girl's dream and nightmare to become a bride.
Not every girl is lucky to met a man of her kind.
Not every girl meets her prince charming the love of her life.
When becoming a man's wife it can be a story of a woman's life.
The amount of years good girls have to wait to be a gentleman's wife.
Having been a gentleman's wife it is not what we think might.
Some days can be a rather unhappy site to be a man's wife.
A wife might end up blowing into her kite.
Girls would you agree that a lot of men can be mites. Written 1997 - 2000
I love you Antonio my longest lasted laddie.
I love you Antonio my longest lasted laddie.
Why did you you go off with another lassie?
You know I love you so madly and sadly.
Now I will never ever have another laddie.
You broken my heart you mean Romano.
I fell in love with you so madly, gladly and sadly Antonio.
You are such a baddie but I love you.
I must be blind not to know that you'd treat me unkind.
Don't you have any love, care understanding on your mind?
I so very much wanted to be your bride so I must get that out of my mind. Written 1996 to 1997.
When you are frightened to love but frightened of being lonely without.
You are frightened of being alone but frightened to love the days and nights seem dull.
The future never seems to come because it's hard to believe that things will get better.
You are worried about getting hurt all over again which brings sadness and pain more and more.
You can feel shame, anger, guilt and happiness can be the only word that you aren't feeling at that moment.
You know that your not getting any younger and the future seems dull because the present is.
Trying to think about when you were happy is hard.
I can see myself just being an old maid because I can't seem to have trust in men.
Lynn you have taken all my happiness away I hope you will be more happy with Antonio than I was.
Antonio you never told me your reason for going off with Lynn, I guess I was never good enough for you.
I just need to learn how to get you out of my head and get on with my life, I should not have hung around where I was not wanted.
When a relationship has ended after such a long time it becomes a big shock.
Finding the best happiness is hard to find, it could take never or a long time.
Could you be wondering
what could become in the end. written 1997.
You are frightened of being alone but frightened to love the days and nights seem dull.
The future never seems to come because it's hard to believe that things will get better.
You are worried about getting hurt all over again which brings sadness and pain more and more.
You can feel shame, anger, guilt and happiness can be the only word that you aren't feeling at that moment.
You know that your not getting any younger and the future seems dull because the present is.
Trying to think about when you were happy is hard.
I can see myself just being an old maid because I can't seem to have trust in men.
Lynn you have taken all my happiness away I hope you will be more happy with Antonio than I was.
Antonio you never told me your reason for going off with Lynn, I guess I was never good enough for you.
I just need to learn how to get you out of my head and get on with my life, I should not have hung around where I was not wanted.
When a relationship has ended after such a long time it becomes a big shock.
Finding the best happiness is hard to find, it could take never or a long time.
Could you be wondering
what could become in the end. written 1997.
Thank you my loving caring friends.
Thank you for having trust in me.
Thank you for been trusting friends to me.
Thank you for listening to me what I have to say to you all.
Thank you for advising me and talking to me.
Thank you for giving the life that I really want.
I'd like to think I can do the same for you.
Without you you all giving me advice I would have cracked up.
I hope my dream will come true to love again.
Thank you for cheering me up when I am feeling down.
Thank you been there when I need you.
Thank you for been honest with me, I will try my best to be honest with you.
Thank you for helping me through disappointments in life.
I will be more than happy to help you you in every way and all the way.
Most of all thank you all for been very good friends and thank you for been you. 1997
Thank you for having trust in me.
Thank you for been trusting friends to me.
Thank you for listening to me what I have to say to you all.
Thank you for advising me and talking to me.
Thank you for giving the life that I really want.
I'd like to think I can do the same for you.
Without you you all giving me advice I would have cracked up.
I hope my dream will come true to love again.
Thank you for cheering me up when I am feeling down.
Thank you been there when I need you.
Thank you for been honest with me, I will try my best to be honest with you.
Thank you for helping me through disappointments in life.
I will be more than happy to help you you in every way and all the way.
Most of all thank you all for been very good friends and thank you for been you. 1997
want to be a writer 1997 - 2000
I want to be a writer, can you please help me write my first book?
My first book is my life story, can you please help me to set out to the pubic?
I am special needs and I need extra help than a writer who is not disabled.
Can you please help me?
I am very interested in short stories, novels, plays and poetry.
This poem was just about me wanting to be a writer.
Having friends.
Everyone should have friends everywhere.
Everyone's friend should be with them there.
Friends should be there to care and do things together for one another.
Keep hold of your friends but love comes and goes.
When I was a girl my school days were the worse days of my life.
I don't know why adults used to tell me that school days are the best years of your life.
The day I left school I felt peace.
School used to really get to me because in every school I went to there were bullies everywhere.
Bullies were my worse nightmare.
Bullies were the death of me.
I learned more out of school than in.
I was born in Wolverhampton but sadly there's no sand and sea.
There's no summer year round to to be.
To me Wolverhampton is just where I live.
Roads, traffic, paths, houses, shops, pubs, night clubs and hospitals.
The traffic is a big danger to any animal and human being.
Wolverhampton is very dull and boring place to be.
My first book is my life story, can you please help me to set out to the pubic?
I am special needs and I need extra help than a writer who is not disabled.
Can you please help me?
I am very interested in short stories, novels, plays and poetry.
This poem was just about me wanting to be a writer.
Having friends.
Everyone should have friends everywhere.
Everyone's friend should be with them there.
Friends should be there to care and do things together for one another.
Keep hold of your friends but love comes and goes.
SCHOOL BULLING AND BAD FRIENDSHIP.
When I was a girl my school days were the worse days of my life.
I don't know why adults used to tell me that school days are the best years of your life.
The day I left school I felt peace.
School used to really get to me because in every school I went to there were bullies everywhere.
Bullies were my worse nightmare.
Bullies were the death of me.
I learned more out of school than in.
I was born in Wolverhampton.
I was born in Wolverhampton but sadly there's no sand and sea.
There's no summer year round to to be.
To me Wolverhampton is just where I live.
Roads, traffic, paths, houses, shops, pubs, night clubs and hospitals.
The traffic is a big danger to any animal and human being.
Wolverhampton is very dull and boring place to be.
Wolverhampton was bad enough when I wrote this poem but now due to smoking ban and credit crunch it's got even worse with very few people going in the pubs.
Peace and quiet is a lovely sound for me because there's no nose to hear.
No war of guns and bombs outside our doors.
No fire works going off through the midnight wind.
We have seen and heard everything that there is to hear.
Children go out to have fun without parents worrying whether there children are still living on this earth.
Adults should be able to know their children are safe, not anymore those days are gone.
This poems explains that it is not a peaceful world now it's got even worse with anti - social behavior.
Peace and quiet for you and me.
Peace and quiet is a lovely sound for me because there's no nose to hear.
No war of guns and bombs outside our doors.
No fire works going off through the midnight wind.
We have seen and heard everything that there is to hear.
Children go out to have fun without parents worrying whether there children are still living on this earth.
Adults should be able to know their children are safe, not anymore those days are gone.
This poems explains that it is not a peaceful world now it's got even worse with anti - social behavior.
Father Ray.
When I was a baby and small child, Father Ray use to take carry me, here there and everywhere.
He use to held my hand everywhere in Fathering care.
Father, Ray use to kiss and cuddle me with tender loving to be.
Father, Ray was always there to make sure I ate all my tea.
When I was fifteen years old he drove round the night clubs in Margate looking for me.
Father, Ray is such a gentleman and Dad to me better than my real Father has been.
In emergency Father, Ray is always there to care and to share.
Father, Ray is a loving Dad as much as he can be.
When it was my birthday Father, Ray was still here with me.
When my Mother told me that my Father was not Ray, I was confused not knowing what was happening to me.
I was mad, angry and I cried.
I was frightened to go to sleep that night in case I had nightmares.
When I was ill Father, Ray took care of me.
Confused parents make confused children, it does not help their relationships either still that's life. In my case I have just left a confused man over mouth ago after 15yrs. I am not confused now at least I hope not anyway.
LOVE.
One always wonders why we are all ever born.
Our parents fall in love and bring us to the world.
Most parents break and then that cause anger, hurt and pain to us all.
We fall in love and the pain of ended love hurts even more.
Love is like a story, love is like a book, please turn over a lot more than a thousand pages your welcome to have a look.
I have got to the stage of thinking either forever love or no love at all the pain is too much to cope with.
I hope I am wrong in thinking I could be so weak, I hope I become strong.
Will I ever met my forever love?
I have fallen in and out of love so many times every love I have had has a Farly tale dream story and nightmare in them.
Our dreams will more than likely come true but life is one big dream for you and me.
When I was a baby and small child, Father Ray use to take carry me, here there and everywhere.
He use to held my hand everywhere in Fathering care.
Father, Ray use to kiss and cuddle me with tender loving to be.
Father, Ray was always there to make sure I ate all my tea.
When I was fifteen years old he drove round the night clubs in Margate looking for me.
Father, Ray is such a gentleman and Dad to me better than my real Father has been.
In emergency Father, Ray is always there to care and to share.
Father, Ray is a loving Dad as much as he can be.
When it was my birthday Father, Ray was still here with me.
When my Mother told me that my Father was not Ray, I was confused not knowing what was happening to me.
I was mad, angry and I cried.
I was frightened to go to sleep that night in case I had nightmares.
When I was ill Father, Ray took care of me.
Confused parents make confused children, it does not help their relationships either still that's life. In my case I have just left a confused man over mouth ago after 15yrs. I am not confused now at least I hope not anyway.
LOVE.
One always wonders why we are all ever born.
Our parents fall in love and bring us to the world.
Most parents break and then that cause anger, hurt and pain to us all.
We fall in love and the pain of ended love hurts even more.
Love is like a story, love is like a book, please turn over a lot more than a thousand pages your welcome to have a look.
I have got to the stage of thinking either forever love or no love at all the pain is too much to cope with.
I hope I am wrong in thinking I could be so weak, I hope I become strong.
Will I ever met my forever love?
I have fallen in and out of love so many times every love I have had has a Farly tale dream story and nightmare in them.
Our dreams will more than likely come true but life is one big dream for you and me.
TO FANNY BRAWNE LOVE FROM JOHN KEATS.
My future is very dark without you, I can't see the light of life at all.
I don't have any happiness to look forward to without you at all.
I don't have love inside me for anyone but you.
Fanny you are the sweetest girl of all.
I want to hide away from life, I can't live any longer without you.
Without you my dear I can't think very clear.
People don't like the fact that my feelings are so strong towards you.
They told me that you'll hurt me, yes you did when I caught you making eyes at another man yet I still foolishly love you all the same.
People think I should get on with my life may be they are right.
My feelings are here for you that I can't help.
Can I face tomorrow without tears?
Fanny if you want me to stay alive please give me your love. 1996 - 1997
John Keats was the first poet I could relate to because he experienced in his time nearly the same as what I experienced in my time. All the love letters he wrote to Fanny Brawne and I think what she wrote to him were in his coffin with him.
Why do I like poetry?
I like poems because I can write about how I feel about life.
Mostly I write about love and romantic.
I try to be a romantic person but then I get hurt.
One thing you will lean romantic poets are loving people but the people they love can easy hurt them.
Poetry gets us through life.
A lot young poets have died young through not be able to cope with relationship break ups for eg John Keats.
Like everyone we have gone through a lot of good and bad which goes into our poetry.
Through childhood I dreamt of my Farly tale love.
I always dream of true love but I keep on learning by mistakes.
I now do my best protect myself from getting hurt again but I feel bed if I upset my partner and it never stops me from loving again someone who I love who loves me for me.
There's very few of us in this world who is lucky enough to meet the right person mainly today.
Even true love has it's ups and downs.
I hope we will do it right this time. Written 1996 - 1997.
I don't have any happiness to look forward to without you at all.
I don't have love inside me for anyone but you.
Fanny you are the sweetest girl of all.
I want to hide away from life, I can't live any longer without you.
Without you my dear I can't think very clear.
People don't like the fact that my feelings are so strong towards you.
They told me that you'll hurt me, yes you did when I caught you making eyes at another man yet I still foolishly love you all the same.
People think I should get on with my life may be they are right.
My feelings are here for you that I can't help.
Can I face tomorrow without tears?
Fanny if you want me to stay alive please give me your love. 1996 - 1997
John Keats was the first poet I could relate to because he experienced in his time nearly the same as what I experienced in my time. All the love letters he wrote to Fanny Brawne and I think what she wrote to him were in his coffin with him.
Why do I like poetry?
I like poems because I can write about how I feel about life.
Mostly I write about love and romantic.
I try to be a romantic person but then I get hurt.
One thing you will lean romantic poets are loving people but the people they love can easy hurt them.
Poetry gets us through life.
A lot young poets have died young through not be able to cope with relationship break ups for eg John Keats.
Like everyone we have gone through a lot of good and bad which goes into our poetry.
Through childhood I dreamt of my Farly tale love.
I always dream of true love but I keep on learning by mistakes.
I now do my best protect myself from getting hurt again but I feel bed if I upset my partner and it never stops me from loving again someone who I love who loves me for me.
There's very few of us in this world who is lucky enough to meet the right person mainly today.
Even true love has it's ups and downs.
I hope we will do it right this time. Written 1996 - 1997.
If getting over the one I love is to be.
If getting over the one I love is to be, I must get over the pain I am in.
It's very hard to get love when feeling is not something one can control.
No matter what they put you through you feelings do control.
It's hard to get over love that means such a lot to you.
He still means a lot to me.
New heart please come to me under the sea.
I must put the past behind, there must be someone out there who loves me a lot better than he did.
I used to think I had trust in love but I am not sure I believe in true love anymore.
The love I lost now feels like death.
My happiness has passed away.
I am so frightened to fall deeply in love again, I do not think I can bare the deep pain.
I do not think I want the chance of a high romance. Written 1996 - 1997.
Moving on and trying again.
This new lover of mine is very kind.
Now I have a new heart that belongs to mine.
Once upon a time Antonio was mine.
Lynn took Antonio's heart away from mine.
I did not think she was very kind at the time.
Looking back now she was very kind, I can get on with this lovely new life of mine.
My longest relationship has gone may be this relationship may be even longer.
I don't want him back anymore, a new love has come to my door.
I live my life everyday hoping that my new will come my way. Written September 1997.
He no more any love of mine.
He walked walked out my life after two and a half years, with another lover on his mind.
He will never find another love like mine, he was warned that he was making a big mistake.
It services him right, now it's too late for him to love me again.
Now I have a new lover he's very kind I hope he knows his own mind. Written September 1997.
If getting over the one I love is to be, I must get over the pain I am in.
It's very hard to get love when feeling is not something one can control.
No matter what they put you through you feelings do control.
It's hard to get over love that means such a lot to you.
He still means a lot to me.
New heart please come to me under the sea.
I must put the past behind, there must be someone out there who loves me a lot better than he did.
I used to think I had trust in love but I am not sure I believe in true love anymore.
The love I lost now feels like death.
My happiness has passed away.
I am so frightened to fall deeply in love again, I do not think I can bare the deep pain.
I do not think I want the chance of a high romance. Written 1996 - 1997.
Moving on and trying again.
This new lover of mine is very kind.
Now I have a new heart that belongs to mine.
Once upon a time Antonio was mine.
Lynn took Antonio's heart away from mine.
I did not think she was very kind at the time.
Looking back now she was very kind, I can get on with this lovely new life of mine.
My longest relationship has gone may be this relationship may be even longer.
I don't want him back anymore, a new love has come to my door.
I live my life everyday hoping that my new will come my way. Written September 1997.
He no more any love of mine.
He walked walked out my life after two and a half years, with another lover on his mind.
He will never find another love like mine, he was warned that he was making a big mistake.
It services him right, now it's too late for him to love me again.
Now I have a new lover he's very kind I hope he knows his own mind. Written September 1997.
0h please stay with me, please never leave me.
Oh please stay in love with me until the end of our time.
Other men have given me such a hard, it's muck up my mind.
Please promise me not to leave me alone other wise I will cry, I will take my own life.
Your always on my mind, I love you and miss you all the time.
After having goodness knows how many boyfriends ended it with me leaving me so sad and blue, I don't think I can't get through.
I love you more than just a true friend.
Please can I trust you as my true boyfriend?
I really want a love who will want me forever.
I only hope that you are the gentleman for me.
Please do not rush into our love, I'd hate to lose you so much.
It's seems to me that you are so true, that you won't leave me blue.
One day at a time I slowly hope to become your bride.
Please please please give me loads of plenty of time.
Please don't worry darling, I never dream of ending it will you. Written September 1997
Oh please stay in love with me until the end of our time.
Other men have given me such a hard, it's muck up my mind.
Please promise me not to leave me alone other wise I will cry, I will take my own life.
Your always on my mind, I love you and miss you all the time.
After having goodness knows how many boyfriends ended it with me leaving me so sad and blue, I don't think I can't get through.
I love you more than just a true friend.
Please can I trust you as my true boyfriend?
I really want a love who will want me forever.
I only hope that you are the gentleman for me.
Please do not rush into our love, I'd hate to lose you so much.
It's seems to me that you are so true, that you won't leave me blue.
One day at a time I slowly hope to become your bride.
Please please please give me loads of plenty of time.
Please don't worry darling, I never dream of ending it will you. Written September 1997
When we were lovers.
What a kind sweet gentleman he used to be.
Whatever has happened to we?
He was full of love, happiness and joy to be.
He used to be a lovely gentleman and boy.
He still has lovely brown eyes.
People think he has lost his mind.
People think he's gone blind.
Now that I have lost him, I am very weary who I find.
What if they don't replace the love I lost?
Where's the man's voice that made me laugh?
Where's his handsome face that made me smile?
Where's the touch of his arms?
Where's the touch of his charm?
Where's the man who walked me home in the dark and the rain.
Where's the man I'd dreamt about in my sleep without a doubt.
Where's the man who beauty me every time he looked at me. written 1997
My lover has gone forever.
My lover has gone forever, my history fellow.
I feel lonely without Tony Romany.
Is everything going very slowly?
Sadly enough I won't be able to love Tony Romany ever again.
Isn't he a dear fellow, feeling under the weather. written 1997.
I love the sea.
I love the beach and the sea.
The beach and the sea is a romantic place to be.
I love the sun shining and rising over the deep blue sea with a lovely yellow sun set.
I think it's the place to be.
I love the yellow sand; it's lovely to lovely make sand castles with children by the sea. 1997 - 2000
Whatever has happened to we?
He was full of love, happiness and joy to be.
He used to be a lovely gentleman and boy.
He still has lovely brown eyes.
People think he has lost his mind.
People think he's gone blind.
Now that I have lost him, I am very weary who I find.
What if they don't replace the love I lost?
Where's the man's voice that made me laugh?
Where's his handsome face that made me smile?
Where's the touch of his arms?
Where's the touch of his charm?
Where's the man who walked me home in the dark and the rain.
Where's the man I'd dreamt about in my sleep without a doubt.
Where's the man who beauty me every time he looked at me. written 1997
My lover has gone forever.
My lover has gone forever, my history fellow.
I feel lonely without Tony Romany.
Is everything going very slowly?
Sadly enough I won't be able to love Tony Romany ever again.
Isn't he a dear fellow, feeling under the weather. written 1997.
I love the sea.
I love the beach and the sea.
The beach and the sea is a romantic place to be.
I love the sun shining and rising over the deep blue sea with a lovely yellow sun set.
I think it's the place to be.
I love the yellow sand; it's lovely to lovely make sand castles with children by the sea. 1997 - 2000
try to be romantic.
I try to be romantic, that's the way I want to be.
If it's not right for women to be romantic I won't be, I will only show my feelings out in poetry.
My feelings towards someone who means a lot to me yet I don't mean a lot to him anymore, he loves another woman.
He hurt me very badly.
I can't help the way I am I was born to be soft and romantic yet I can't help who I fall for either.
He may well rip my heart into a thousand pieces yet I love him like there's no other man on this earth.
Now I find it hard to stop writing poetry as my feelings are uncontrolled.
Believe me that man was not as special as I made him out to be in this poem, I only thought he was. How blind was he not to understand how much I loved him but how blind was I to not understand that he did not really love me? Then we may have just loved one another as much as we could. We were both blind in our ways in our minds. written 1997.
If only I knew whether you are right or wrong for me.
From the day I first met you I thought you were the right person for me.
You left me sad, lonely and blue.
You know it's true that even now I still love you but you don't feel the same way anymore.
I don't understand why I still love someone who has not got the time a day for me.
Sometimes I feel like locking myself away in my bedroom and never coming out but other times I feel lonely.
Live in the bedroom with a kettle, food, toilet but I need to cut down on my heavy drinking.
Not seeing the world again to get away from pain is how I feel.
I don't feel very strong at all, there doe not see to be an end to all this but there must be an end to pain somewhere and somehow.
Surly I can't keep on feeling depressed like this, there's got to be light at the end of the tunnel somewhere.
All I do is write pages and pages of romantic poetry about you, it shows how mad and crazy I am about you which makes me mad and crazy when you don't feel the same about me.
How strange is that?
I feel ashamed to love someone who does not love me but my feelings have so much control over me.
There must be someone better out who loves me for me but I find it hard to believe that I will love him because foolishly my feelings are still with you.
I must love the wrong man, what is it about love it just blinds you?
Now you have gone, I must move on I must carry on without you.
It's hard to do because I miss you so true.
Everywhere I stand I see lovers kissing and hugging everyday.
They must think I have lost my way. Written 1997.
I wrote this poem to say I love you.
I wrote this poem to say I love you whatever you have put you have put me through.
I must be mad to have you back but I still love you, don't you dare hurt me again because you won't get another chance.
I thought I stopped loving at one point but that's too hard to do.
One day we looked into one another eyes but we have known one another too long to say no.
There's only so much I can take, if hurt me again I will break.
If you hurt me again you will be full of regrets because I can't keep giving chances when it suits you to love me again.
Think this through carefully because one day I could be with someone who sticks to his word, who does not mess around like you do.
If I meet this person it will be too late for you to change your mind.
I'd be sure about your feelings if I were you and stick to my word. written 2001
Tell me why you left me?
Tell me why you made me cry?
Tell me why you left me?
Did you just make one silly mistake.
I must be mad to take you back.
You must have known you hurt me really bad.
It will take me a while to get my trust back you again but my love is still there for you.
I wish I did not love you then I would worry in case you hurt me again but my love for you is far too strong to let go of you. written 2001
They must think I have lost my way. Written 1997.
I wrote this poem to say I love you.
I wrote this poem to say I love you whatever you have put you have put me through.
I must be mad to have you back but I still love you, don't you dare hurt me again because you won't get another chance.
I thought I stopped loving at one point but that's too hard to do.
One day we looked into one another eyes but we have known one another too long to say no.
There's only so much I can take, if hurt me again I will break.
If you hurt me again you will be full of regrets because I can't keep giving chances when it suits you to love me again.
Think this through carefully because one day I could be with someone who sticks to his word, who does not mess around like you do.
If I meet this person it will be too late for you to change your mind.
I'd be sure about your feelings if I were you and stick to my word. written 2001
Tell me why you left me?
Tell me why you made me cry?
Tell me why you left me?
Did you just make one silly mistake.
I must be mad to take you back.
You must have known you hurt me really bad.
It will take me a while to get my trust back you again but my love is still there for you.
I wish I did not love you then I would worry in case you hurt me again but my love for you is far too strong to let go of you. written 2001
I lost you once I don't want to lose you again.
Monday and Tuesday I miss you, I think about you and dream about you.
I can't close my eyes at night you are on my mind all the time.
After the break I am happy to see you.
The nights without you go far too slow.
Mondays and Tuesdays I count the hours when I see you again.
The rest of the week goes far too fast.
As soon as we are together again the lights turn then off.
When I am at home alone I study, maths, draw type and write.
I still manage to do my best job, even I do think about you. written 2001
I used to wonder what was the point?
What was the point us been together?
My point is that I loved you for you, only yesterday but today and always.
Even if we don't have enough time to spend together, I will look forward to it when we do.
The most important thing in my life is you, after working those long hours you need you sleep. written 2000
My thoughts
My thoughts are now quiet about you but my poems are public about you as they are written down on paper.
I need to get my thoughts off my chest at my best.
I need to tell the world how I love you.
I know there's nothing I can do to win your love back.
The bright side is the happy memories we had together.
Those memories are here to stay with me and never go away.
I'm missing you so much but I feel so unloved.
Being without you causes so much sadness for me. written 1997 - 2001
I need help!
Monday and Tuesday I miss you, I think about you and dream about you.
I can't close my eyes at night you are on my mind all the time.
After the break I am happy to see you.
The nights without you go far too slow.
Mondays and Tuesdays I count the hours when I see you again.
The rest of the week goes far too fast.
As soon as we are together again the lights turn then off.
When I am at home alone I study, maths, draw type and write.
I still manage to do my best job, even I do think about you. written 2001
I used to wonder what was the point?
What was the point us been together?
My point is that I loved you for you, only yesterday but today and always.
Even if we don't have enough time to spend together, I will look forward to it when we do.
The most important thing in my life is you, after working those long hours you need you sleep. written 2000
My thoughts
My thoughts are now quiet about you but my poems are public about you as they are written down on paper.
I need to get my thoughts off my chest at my best.
I need to tell the world how I love you.
I know there's nothing I can do to win your love back.
The bright side is the happy memories we had together.
Those memories are here to stay with me and never go away.
I'm missing you so much but I feel so unloved.
Being without you causes so much sadness for me. written 1997 - 2001
I need help!
I need help to build my happiness back.
I need joy back in my life again.
I need help to end sorrow and pain.
It's hard to know if I will see a better day tomorrow.
The only way I can get on with life is write about how I feel about in my poetry day by day.
I know I need to help myself but I believe that will happen slowly.
I am not alone in this happiness, joy, sadness and sorrow.
It happens to every man, boy, girl and woman.
When problems have everyone needs their family and friends round them.
When help is given, things get taken on people when someone is stuffing from a break down.
The good thing is that you end up helping someone to get over the same thing as what you went through. written 1997
I miss my high romance.
I once had a high romance I'd have it back if I had a chance.
I don't think I will ever have the chance to get it back.
I will sleep, then see what tomorrow brings.
Before I sleep I puff the pillows up and weep.
I don't dream anymore, my dreams have turned to nightmares that's why I can't sleep.
I have nightmare of been hurt and nightmares of been alone.
I don't have any feelings of love to let out, I am just mixed in my mind.
I only have love inside me for one person but he does not love me.
My beauty in love has been loved but lost.
Now there's no beauty left to love.
I need joy back in my life again.
I need help to end sorrow and pain.
It's hard to know if I will see a better day tomorrow.
The only way I can get on with life is write about how I feel about in my poetry day by day.
I know I need to help myself but I believe that will happen slowly.
I am not alone in this happiness, joy, sadness and sorrow.
It happens to every man, boy, girl and woman.
When problems have everyone needs their family and friends round them.
When help is given, things get taken on people when someone is stuffing from a break down.
The good thing is that you end up helping someone to get over the same thing as what you went through. written 1997
I miss my high romance.
I once had a high romance I'd have it back if I had a chance.
I don't think I will ever have the chance to get it back.
I will sleep, then see what tomorrow brings.
Before I sleep I puff the pillows up and weep.
I don't dream anymore, my dreams have turned to nightmares that's why I can't sleep.
I have nightmare of been hurt and nightmares of been alone.
I don't have any feelings of love to let out, I am just mixed in my mind.
I only have love inside me for one person but he does not love me.
My beauty in love has been loved but lost.
Now there's no beauty left to love.
May be I thought I was in love but I was not.
It's hard to know If I am in or out of love. written 1997
Lye in bed.
I lye bed wondering what kind of future I have left.
I'm trying to think about what I should do next.
I am trying to work out what is the right thing to do.
I never forget the first day we met it was the happiest day of my life yet.
My mind is so mixed up and confused about you I can't rest yet.
When you told me it was over, I knew I had lost you for good.
The sadness feels like death.
Very happy memories of you never forgotten.
I wish happiness and love with your future loves.
I know I can't change how you feel you love her not me. written 1997.
It's hard to know If I am in or out of love. written 1997
Lye in bed.
I lye bed wondering what kind of future I have left.
I'm trying to think about what I should do next.
I am trying to work out what is the right thing to do.
I never forget the first day we met it was the happiest day of my life yet.
My mind is so mixed up and confused about you I can't rest yet.
When you told me it was over, I knew I had lost you for good.
The sadness feels like death.
Very happy memories of you never forgotten.
I wish happiness and love with your future loves.
I know I can't change how you feel you love her not me. written 1997.
A man I thought I loved and lost.
There was once a lad I thought I had.
He was so charming at the time I thought he was the man.
He was such a bad lad, I must have been mad.
In the end he made me so sad.
When he was not in my life anymore I was gland.
He was such a Jack the lad, he went after so many girls with so many curls.
He put his untrue charm that didn't get him very far.
He lied to me, he told me he had a flash car that also didn't get him very far.
His name was Preen, who pretended to been keen.
He wasn't keen, he was mean.
He's a loser, who doesn't give a dam about any woman only having their money off them.
He was a con man and woman beater, user and abuser.
We talk about the man, gentleman and mouse, Preen wasn't either of them Preen was an evil rat!
He would sleep with girls, frightened them and give them fear of other men.
He would talk about their private life, he would break other relationships with a knife.
He gave me so much fear for many years in the relationship I had after, I am only just starting to trust now.
I was on my own for six mouth after me and Preen finished, I never thought I'd love again.
I regret ever knowing him let a lone going with him.
My next lover was alright but even though I loved him I had a job to trust him which drove him to another woman in the end.
I said to myself for a long time to be friends with someone and see how it goes.
I want someone who will get me over my fright and fear after all those years.
Did you get me through this dear?
No you didn't I got over it myself somehow.
I want someone who understands my problems, someone who has been there himself.
Now I have long come terms with what Steven Preen put me through but it took good many years to get over that.
He once loved me no he didn't it was a silly nightmare of mine.
I wanted someone who cared about me and who could help me come out of my problems.
My partner after Steven coped with it for a while then he could not stand anymore and then he came back to then now it's clashed for good. written 1997 - 2009.
There was once a lad I thought I had.
He was so charming at the time I thought he was the man.
He was such a bad lad, I must have been mad.
In the end he made me so sad.
When he was not in my life anymore I was gland.
He was such a Jack the lad, he went after so many girls with so many curls.
He put his untrue charm that didn't get him very far.
He lied to me, he told me he had a flash car that also didn't get him very far.
His name was Preen, who pretended to been keen.
He wasn't keen, he was mean.
He's a loser, who doesn't give a dam about any woman only having their money off them.
He was a con man and woman beater, user and abuser.
We talk about the man, gentleman and mouse, Preen wasn't either of them Preen was an evil rat!
He would sleep with girls, frightened them and give them fear of other men.
He would talk about their private life, he would break other relationships with a knife.
He gave me so much fear for many years in the relationship I had after, I am only just starting to trust now.
I was on my own for six mouth after me and Preen finished, I never thought I'd love again.
I regret ever knowing him let a lone going with him.
My next lover was alright but even though I loved him I had a job to trust him which drove him to another woman in the end.
I said to myself for a long time to be friends with someone and see how it goes.
I want someone who will get me over my fright and fear after all those years.
Did you get me through this dear?
No you didn't I got over it myself somehow.
I want someone who understands my problems, someone who has been there himself.
Now I have long come terms with what Steven Preen put me through but it took good many years to get over that.
He once loved me no he didn't it was a silly nightmare of mine.
I wanted someone who cared about me and who could help me come out of my problems.
My partner after Steven coped with it for a while then he could not stand anymore and then he came back to then now it's clashed for good. written 1997 - 2009.
It's hard to keep it quiet that I love you.
It's very hard to keep it quiet that I love you.
There are times I feel happy.
There are times I feel sad.
That depends on whether things are good or bad.
It's hard to love someone else after loving you so long.
Now I am upset more.
Don't get me wrong, I must tell myself that it's not the end of my life.
You did not have to love me for life.
Why does love and loneliness cause so much pain?
I understand now that I don't have to have a lover I can just have a good friend.
It's hard to explain, you can't live without love but you can't live with it either.
Whatever you do, do what makes you happy.
One thing I have learned in life, whatever it it is if you sussed try and try again but if someone let's you down in love and friendship, it's not going to work, I know I have had the pain more than once. written 1997 - 2001
Marriage.
Marriage should full of love and support.
Nine out of ten marriages end in divorce.
Marriage should be full of happiness and joy.
Marriages should be full of laughs not cry.
Marriages should be full of a girl and a boy.
We must accept love and marriage is not a bed of roses.
If it was perfect it would be boring.
Like all walks of life, marriage is either a success or it is not. Written 1997
It's very hard to keep it quiet that I love you.
There are times I feel happy.
There are times I feel sad.
That depends on whether things are good or bad.
It's hard to love someone else after loving you so long.
Now I am upset more.
Don't get me wrong, I must tell myself that it's not the end of my life.
You did not have to love me for life.
Why does love and loneliness cause so much pain?
I understand now that I don't have to have a lover I can just have a good friend.
It's hard to explain, you can't live without love but you can't live with it either.
Whatever you do, do what makes you happy.
One thing I have learned in life, whatever it it is if you sussed try and try again but if someone let's you down in love and friendship, it's not going to work, I know I have had the pain more than once. written 1997 - 2001
Marriage.
Marriage should full of love and support.
Nine out of ten marriages end in divorce.
Marriage should be full of happiness and joy.
Marriages should be full of laughs not cry.
Marriages should be full of a girl and a boy.
We must accept love and marriage is not a bed of roses.
If it was perfect it would be boring.
Like all walks of life, marriage is either a success or it is not. Written 1997
You beauty is love forever.
Your beauty and love is forever.
Please sit and dream of wonderful love my lovely fella.
You will met the love of your life when it's lovely weather.
I can't say the love you choose will be me.
I hope and wish happiness for you to be.
May be one day you will met a lovely lady that will swim with you under the deep blue sea, I wish her to be sweeter than me.
I know it won't be me. Written 1997
He will know when he's met the love of his life.
He will know when he has met the love of his life.
He will enjoy love better when the weather is better.
He will met the love of his life when the time is right.
He will live with and marry her to be his bride in time for the rest of his life . Written 1997.
The lover that was mine.
The one I love is burned alive.
He used to be a lover of mine but not at the end of time.
I do not want or love him anymore, he is no longer my lover.
I now have a have a new lover who is like no other.
I love my new lover ten times more than I loved my old lover.
I thought my new lover would find it hard to find me but it was not that hard after all.
This new lover is very very kind to me.
Now that I have a new heart that belongs to mine I can learn to get Antonio off my mind.
Once upon a time Antonio was mine.
Lynn took Antonio's heart away from mine, at the time I though she was not very kind but now I know I need to get him off my mind.
No matter how hard I try, I just can't get him off my mind. Autumn to winter 1997
Your beauty and love is forever.
Please sit and dream of wonderful love my lovely fella.
You will met the love of your life when it's lovely weather.
I can't say the love you choose will be me.
I hope and wish happiness for you to be.
May be one day you will met a lovely lady that will swim with you under the deep blue sea, I wish her to be sweeter than me.
I know it won't be me. Written 1997
He will know when he's met the love of his life.
He will know when he has met the love of his life.
He will enjoy love better when the weather is better.
He will met the love of his life when the time is right.
He will live with and marry her to be his bride in time for the rest of his life . Written 1997.
The lover that was mine.
The one I love is burned alive.
He used to be a lover of mine but not at the end of time.
I do not want or love him anymore, he is no longer my lover.
I now have a have a new lover who is like no other.
I love my new lover ten times more than I loved my old lover.
I thought my new lover would find it hard to find me but it was not that hard after all.
This new lover is very very kind to me.
Now that I have a new heart that belongs to mine I can learn to get Antonio off my mind.
Once upon a time Antonio was mine.
Lynn took Antonio's heart away from mine, at the time I though she was not very kind but now I know I need to get him off my mind.
No matter how hard I try, I just can't get him off my mind. Autumn to winter 1997
Do I hope?
I will believe in myself a bit more.
I will get stronger in my self a stream if you know what I mean.
I will get rid of fears.
I have hope for the future rather than feeling as if I don't want to be on this planet anymore. Written 1997.
I know I can't expect all good luck.
Bad luck comes at it's worse.
When a lot of bad things can come at once then it all can be too much.
It does not hurt to turn to good luck. Written 1997.
For two old good friends of mine, I think wanted to get together back but I never understood why they did not get together as a couple.
I will believe in myself a bit more.
I will get stronger in my self a stream if you know what I mean.
I will get rid of fears.
I have hope for the future rather than feeling as if I don't want to be on this planet anymore. Written 1997.
I know I can't expect all good luck.
Bad luck comes at it's worse.
When a lot of bad things can come at once then it all can be too much.
It does not hurt to turn to good luck. Written 1997.
For two old good friends of mine, I think wanted to get together back but I never understood why they did not get together as a couple.
Why do I fancy you?
You are my hero of my heart.
The more I see you the more I love you.
You are the most important person in life.
You mean the wide world to me.
You make sure that I don't come to any harm.
You are the only gentleman that cares for me so far.
Every night you are in my dreams.
Everyday you are in my heart.
You are my only dream lover of all.
You are the only gentleman that is part of my flat as well as part of my life.
I never ever want to lose you, I love as mine until the end of my time.
Please give me a call as a friend if that's what you want!
Please never ever forget the way I feel about you.
To try carrying hard as a close friend is hard but that is nice for the rest of our lives as long as I am with you.
If we were to have been lovers it would have been just as lovely.
What does it matter as long as you give some kind of love?
This is what we have always had from another love whether we have been friends or lovers.
It would be a big surprise if you were to become the lover of my life.
I will live with whatever you want me to do as long as you are close to me.
All I can do is think of you and dream about you every day and night in every way. Written 1997 - 1998.
You are my hero of my heart.
The more I see you the more I love you.
You are the most important person in life.
You mean the wide world to me.
You make sure that I don't come to any harm.
You are the only gentleman that cares for me so far.
Every night you are in my dreams.
Everyday you are in my heart.
You are my only dream lover of all.
You are the only gentleman that is part of my flat as well as part of my life.
I never ever want to lose you, I love as mine until the end of my time.
Please give me a call as a friend if that's what you want!
Please never ever forget the way I feel about you.
To try carrying hard as a close friend is hard but that is nice for the rest of our lives as long as I am with you.
If we were to have been lovers it would have been just as lovely.
What does it matter as long as you give some kind of love?
This is what we have always had from another love whether we have been friends or lovers.
It would be a big surprise if you were to become the lover of my life.
I will live with whatever you want me to do as long as you are close to me.
All I can do is think of you and dream about you every day and night in every way. Written 1997 - 1998.
The love has come back to my heart.
My love has come back into my heart but I know that we live so far apart.
We must not upset the apple cart, we will look forward to seeing one another when we do. Written 1997.
Tonight I will sleep without you but I will still feel your love.
I wish now I could win your love for good.
You are too far away for me to love but I love very much.
I really hope our love will never ever end. Written 1997.
Love calms.
Love is like a breath of fresh air for a lad and lass to share.
When you are young you can never know how long it will last.
Love can be such a painful thing.
The dart hit the human love of his heart. Written 1997
When my lover has gone away.
When my lover has gone away, my whole life feels as if it's going down the drain.
What have I got, I won't want to be lonely but that's the way it is?
At the moment I need help off my friends.
I just need a man to love.
Could be any man?
In 1997 I though Ian Hutchinson was the man for me.
Would I believe in love at first site?
I am yet to see it once and the last time in my life.
That is a good question, I wish I really knew the answer. Written 1997
My love has come back into my heart but I know that we live so far apart.
We must not upset the apple cart, we will look forward to seeing one another when we do. Written 1997.
Tonight I will sleep without you but I will still feel your love.
I wish now I could win your love for good.
You are too far away for me to love but I love very much.
I really hope our love will never ever end. Written 1997.
Love calms.
Love is like a breath of fresh air for a lad and lass to share.
When you are young you can never know how long it will last.
Love can be such a painful thing.
The dart hit the human love of his heart. Written 1997
When my lover has gone away.
When my lover has gone away, my whole life feels as if it's going down the drain.
What have I got, I won't want to be lonely but that's the way it is?
At the moment I need help off my friends.
I just need a man to love.
Could be any man?
In 1997 I though Ian Hutchinson was the man for me.
Would I believe in love at first site?
I am yet to see it once and the last time in my life.
That is a good question, I wish I really knew the answer. Written 1997
After a long time crying.
After a long time crying, I awake my crying eyes into happy eyes from my sleep.
The sere ct is that I love you again, I think I am falling back on my feet after a long crying sleep.
I faint back in my seat of the thought of being loved again.
When I awake again from a long nightmare, I open the curtains ( What do I see?)
I see the hot sunshine looking at me with blue blossoms on the tall trees.
Open the windows for fresh, smell or the blossoms.
Finely walk my lover in here, I am in the arms of the tender lips that will kiss.
His tender eyes appear with his tender happy smile.
He has a lovely sweet smile.
When we are together our hearts become on fire, only cold water can cool our desire. Written 1997.
Coming to terms with you and me apart.
I know I could not forget you if I wanted to.
I could not stop feeling in love with you.
When I did not see you I still could not stop loving you.I could stop caring for you. Written 1997.
Which is it to be love or loneliness for me?
Which is it to be love or loneliness for me to be?
Plenty of people have told me there are plenty more fish in the sea you see.
The amount of loves I have loved, I hope I will catch the fish or will he catch me?
There's always a fear back in my mind that my fish may jump back in the sea as they mostly do.
To be brave is the way to aim to be, otherwise I will always be frightened to love again. Written 1997.
After a long time crying, I awake my crying eyes into happy eyes from my sleep.
The sere ct is that I love you again, I think I am falling back on my feet after a long crying sleep.
I faint back in my seat of the thought of being loved again.
When I awake again from a long nightmare, I open the curtains ( What do I see?)
I see the hot sunshine looking at me with blue blossoms on the tall trees.
Open the windows for fresh, smell or the blossoms.
Finely walk my lover in here, I am in the arms of the tender lips that will kiss.
His tender eyes appear with his tender happy smile.
He has a lovely sweet smile.
When we are together our hearts become on fire, only cold water can cool our desire. Written 1997.
Coming to terms with you and me apart.
I know I could not forget you if I wanted to.
I could not stop feeling in love with you.
When I did not see you I still could not stop loving you.I could stop caring for you. Written 1997.
Which is it to be love or loneliness for me?
Which is it to be love or loneliness for me to be?
Plenty of people have told me there are plenty more fish in the sea you see.
The amount of loves I have loved, I hope I will catch the fish or will he catch me?
There's always a fear back in my mind that my fish may jump back in the sea as they mostly do.
To be brave is the way to aim to be, otherwise I will always be frightened to love again. Written 1997.
I have had a lucky escape.
I have had a lucky escape, a lassie has taken my laddie Antonio away from me.
Now I am happy to say I have my new lover on my way.
At the end of the day happy history memories have melted away.
I hope I will be just as happy with this lover as I was with the other.
My new happiness washes my tears away.
I just hope my new lover is here to stay.
My old lover really truly hurt me.
I am glad to say that Antonio has gone away.
Now at last slowly my life is getting back together again.
It may well not be the same as what it used to be like.
I know deep inside my heart, I have had a lucky escape.
I never ever want my old lover back again.
I hope my new love won't turn out like my old love.
I will never forget the day we met on the 16th May 1994.
My older lover and I fell in love at first site, we should have known it was not right.
Now I have had a lucky escape I can move on with my life. Written 1997.
What is love, where is love?
Love can be full of romantic wonderful things.
The happiest times should be when the birds sing in spring.
You just catch the right fish in the sea, that can be hard to be.
Sometimes love can end with anger, sorrow and pain.
Sometimes love can be such a strain.
Sometimes love can be anywhere to be.
Sometimes you can met love in the most strange places to be.
Love can happen anywhere to be, it could be under the sea. Written 1997
I have had a lucky escape, a lassie has taken my laddie Antonio away from me.
Now I am happy to say I have my new lover on my way.
At the end of the day happy history memories have melted away.
I hope I will be just as happy with this lover as I was with the other.
My new happiness washes my tears away.
I just hope my new lover is here to stay.
My old lover really truly hurt me.
I am glad to say that Antonio has gone away.
Now at last slowly my life is getting back together again.
It may well not be the same as what it used to be like.
I know deep inside my heart, I have had a lucky escape.
I never ever want my old lover back again.
I hope my new love won't turn out like my old love.
I will never forget the day we met on the 16th May 1994.
My older lover and I fell in love at first site, we should have known it was not right.
Now I have had a lucky escape I can move on with my life. Written 1997.
What is love, where is love?
Love can be full of romantic wonderful things.
The happiest times should be when the birds sing in spring.
You just catch the right fish in the sea, that can be hard to be.
Sometimes love can end with anger, sorrow and pain.
Sometimes love can be such a strain.
Sometimes love can be anywhere to be.
Sometimes you can met love in the most strange places to be.
Love can happen anywhere to be, it could be under the sea. Written 1997
Some Men
I have had many friends but only one as a boyfriend if and when I have one.
Should say men friends or baby boys, friends, depending on whether they act their age or shoe size?
Do men ever grow up?
Where are these men to be?
When men goes down the pub women don't always see them unless the men are drunk.
Men will then go home and go to sleep.
Why can't I find love, who wants me?
Why can't there be a match bet ween their feelings and mine?
At the end of the day, they should know where their bread is buttered.
Women ask men anything then they keep too much to their chest. ( What's on your mind love?)
He should also know how to make the bed at his best.
If he does not know how to make his bed, he can still lye in it.
Sometimes I wish I was an animal, I would not cause any problem to other animals.
Whatever god wants me to be I must if god is to be.
A human being I was born to be.
I wish my love felt like a wild red rose.
I am a young lass who does not drink splits very often but when I do I land on my knees.
Through the hot summer I lye along the glass catching the sun on my body dreaming about the next gentleman to be.
Some men lock themselves in a room keeping their problems to their chest.
That's one thing woman do not do, they share their problems mostly with each other.
Men never really tell woman what is on their minds but woman tell men what's on their minds.
Girls are the best at getting things off their chests, men kept problems to their vests.
Some men tell their wives and girls to keep out their way to make the females worry about them.
Some men don't tell women anything.
It may hit some men more when love comes to an end. Late 1996 to mid 1997
I have had many friends but only one as a boyfriend if and when I have one.
Should say men friends or baby boys, friends, depending on whether they act their age or shoe size?
Do men ever grow up?
Where are these men to be?
When men goes down the pub women don't always see them unless the men are drunk.
Men will then go home and go to sleep.
Why can't I find love, who wants me?
Why can't there be a match bet ween their feelings and mine?
At the end of the day, they should know where their bread is buttered.
Women ask men anything then they keep too much to their chest. ( What's on your mind love?)
He should also know how to make the bed at his best.
If he does not know how to make his bed, he can still lye in it.
Sometimes I wish I was an animal, I would not cause any problem to other animals.
Whatever god wants me to be I must if god is to be.
A human being I was born to be.
I wish my love felt like a wild red rose.
I am a young lass who does not drink splits very often but when I do I land on my knees.
Through the hot summer I lye along the glass catching the sun on my body dreaming about the next gentleman to be.
Some men lock themselves in a room keeping their problems to their chest.
That's one thing woman do not do, they share their problems mostly with each other.
Men never really tell woman what is on their minds but woman tell men what's on their minds.
Girls are the best at getting things off their chests, men kept problems to their vests.
Some men tell their wives and girls to keep out their way to make the females worry about them.
Some men don't tell women anything.
It may hit some men more when love comes to an end. Late 1996 to mid 1997
I put my head in the sand.
No one seems to agree with my way of thinking when it comes to love so now my head is in the sand and my thoughts are kept to myself.
My head is in between hands I may not make the right choices in my life.
There seems to be no where forward than feeling as if I am sitting inside a train as it's driving through a dark tunnel that has not got to the light, it seems to go on forever.
There must be an end a dark tunnel somewhere.
Turn on the light please or is there no light?
I am scared of the present and the future.
I feel very lonely and very sad.
A lot of frights and fears are inside my mind.
Every time I tell people my thoughts it does not pleases them but it's pleases me, what pleases them does not please me, it's just time to wait and see or life is the end for me.
I understand people are only protecting me from getting hurt but my feelings have control over me, can't they see?
How can I love without being blind?
I may as well do what I want and let people talk all they like.
One thing I feel like is living my life in sin, no man does not seem to be right for me and I do not seem to be right for them. Written 1997.
You are my lover and your love is sweet.
You are my lover who gives me such a romantic time.
Lovely romance, so glad I have taken the chance.
I while make the most of it while this romance lasts.
I am a lass who loves to enjoy the chance of love and romance.
I love romantic gentlemen but there are not many about.
I could never ask for a romance to last forever because that's too much to ask.
When you kiss my lips your far to good to forget.
I miss your tender loving lips to bits.
One day my dear I fear that you may break my heart like many men have, then you will move onto another heart. Written 1997
No one seems to agree with my way of thinking when it comes to love so now my head is in the sand and my thoughts are kept to myself.
My head is in between hands I may not make the right choices in my life.
There seems to be no where forward than feeling as if I am sitting inside a train as it's driving through a dark tunnel that has not got to the light, it seems to go on forever.
There must be an end a dark tunnel somewhere.
Turn on the light please or is there no light?
I am scared of the present and the future.
I feel very lonely and very sad.
A lot of frights and fears are inside my mind.
Every time I tell people my thoughts it does not pleases them but it's pleases me, what pleases them does not please me, it's just time to wait and see or life is the end for me.
I understand people are only protecting me from getting hurt but my feelings have control over me, can't they see?
How can I love without being blind?
I may as well do what I want and let people talk all they like.
One thing I feel like is living my life in sin, no man does not seem to be right for me and I do not seem to be right for them. Written 1997.
You are my lover and your love is sweet.
You are my lover who gives me such a romantic time.
Lovely romance, so glad I have taken the chance.
I while make the most of it while this romance lasts.
I am a lass who loves to enjoy the chance of love and romance.
I love romantic gentlemen but there are not many about.
I could never ask for a romance to last forever because that's too much to ask.
When you kiss my lips your far to good to forget.
I miss your tender loving lips to bits.
One day my dear I fear that you may break my heart like many men have, then you will move onto another heart. Written 1997
I dream.
I dream of a young gentleman sweeping me off my feet.
Someone who I can have for the rest of my life which happens to very few people these days.
I dream of living to a great age and having no pain just a peaceful death.
Sitting and laying forever together by a sunny stream would be a perfect dream.
I dream of love and happiness for me and you but slow love not fast, that's how I want it to be, do you want the same too?
I hope our love will stay true.
I hope our love is not blind.
As a little girl I used to look at the fishes in the sea wondering the right fish in sea is for me.
I am still waiting for the right fish for me but I don't think I will ever catch him he may not even catch me.
I would love to think that our love is tender and kind to pass away.
Are you who I have been waiting for all my life?
I hope you are the gentleman for me.
I dream of us holding hands by the stream.
I dream of our love growing stronger and for longer and longer.
I hope that my love life is not just a dream.
I hope love is for you and me. Written 1997.
My heart is so full of love for you.
My heart is so full of love for you.
My lips is so tender enough to kiss you tender lips.
The summer sunshine should make our love rose enough.
I hope that we still love in heaven.
You are more than just the love of my life you also my best male friend.
For such sweetness you have it's hard to explain in words how I feel about you.
I want my future with you I hope it will happen to both of us.
I love you more than the earth and sea.
We love and rest at our best.
I will keep your heart when you need me and want me, you undo my heart with your key.Your heart is tender enough for me. Written 1994 to 1996.
I dream of a young gentleman sweeping me off my feet.
Someone who I can have for the rest of my life which happens to very few people these days.
I dream of living to a great age and having no pain just a peaceful death.
Sitting and laying forever together by a sunny stream would be a perfect dream.
I dream of love and happiness for me and you but slow love not fast, that's how I want it to be, do you want the same too?
I hope our love will stay true.
I hope our love is not blind.
As a little girl I used to look at the fishes in the sea wondering the right fish in sea is for me.
I am still waiting for the right fish for me but I don't think I will ever catch him he may not even catch me.
I would love to think that our love is tender and kind to pass away.
Are you who I have been waiting for all my life?
I hope you are the gentleman for me.
I dream of us holding hands by the stream.
I dream of our love growing stronger and for longer and longer.
I hope that my love life is not just a dream.
I hope love is for you and me. Written 1997.
My heart is so full of love for you.
My heart is so full of love for you.
My lips is so tender enough to kiss you tender lips.
The summer sunshine should make our love rose enough.
I hope that we still love in heaven.
You are more than just the love of my life you also my best male friend.
For such sweetness you have it's hard to explain in words how I feel about you.
I want my future with you I hope it will happen to both of us.
I love you more than the earth and sea.
We love and rest at our best.
I will keep your heart when you need me and want me, you undo my heart with your key.Your heart is tender enough for me. Written 1994 to 1996.
I had splendid love he was the best gentleman I had ever had.
I thought he was the best I ever had, how wrong was I.
I thought he gave me what I wanted in life, he was my lover.
I don't think we will ever love one another again.
May be I will be with him in heaven.
Now I am without him my life is like hell.
If only he still loved me or if only I did not love him anymore.
If only he would have stayed with me he would have been still with me now.
If only he still wanted me.
The year is 1997, Monday 16th May 1994 we met, would have been three years today if we would have still together.
Whatever went wrong bet ween us for it to come to this?
Why did he leave me in the dark alone? Written May 16th 1997
Love poems.
I love you more than just a true friend.
Please would you be my true boyfriend or is that too much ask?
I have had so many men who have ended it with me so blue, I really want a love that's forever true.
It seems to me that you are true, I have a lot of trust in you.
Please don't rush things, I would really truly hate to lose you.
I love and miss you just as much.
May be one time I will become your bride but not for a long time yet, we have loads of time.
Please don't worry I would not dream of ending it with you because I easy get upset too.
I mean what I say is true, it's the whole truth nothing but the truth.
I hope you believe me too. Written 1997
Love and life.
Love can hurt you enough like a knife that goes through your veins.
When love ends it brings so much pain, strain and shame.
When love begins it can bring the sweetest of things.
With any luck your love will be mine right up to the end of time.
Sometimes love can be so mean when you are so keen, it sends up blind right until the end of your time. Written Late 20th century to early 21st century.
I thought he was the best I ever had, how wrong was I.
I thought he gave me what I wanted in life, he was my lover.
I don't think we will ever love one another again.
May be I will be with him in heaven.
Now I am without him my life is like hell.
If only he still loved me or if only I did not love him anymore.
If only he would have stayed with me he would have been still with me now.
If only he still wanted me.
The year is 1997, Monday 16th May 1994 we met, would have been three years today if we would have still together.
Whatever went wrong bet ween us for it to come to this?
Why did he leave me in the dark alone? Written May 16th 1997
Love poems.
I love you more than just a true friend.
Please would you be my true boyfriend or is that too much ask?
I have had so many men who have ended it with me so blue, I really want a love that's forever true.
It seems to me that you are true, I have a lot of trust in you.
Please don't rush things, I would really truly hate to lose you.
I love and miss you just as much.
May be one time I will become your bride but not for a long time yet, we have loads of time.
Please don't worry I would not dream of ending it with you because I easy get upset too.
I mean what I say is true, it's the whole truth nothing but the truth.
I hope you believe me too. Written 1997
Love and life.
Love can hurt you enough like a knife that goes through your veins.
When love ends it brings so much pain, strain and shame.
When love begins it can bring the sweetest of things.
With any luck your love will be mine right up to the end of time.
Sometimes love can be so mean when you are so keen, it sends up blind right until the end of your time. Written Late 20th century to early 21st century.
I thought I would never love again.
I thought I would be brave enough to love again.
When I love again ups and downs well start again but that's life.
Love can be wonderful, romantic, lovely and good.
Love can turn evil and bad.
If long lasting couple stay together forever.
They go round the bend if they spend too much time together.
Old and gray will pass their days.
No energy of love brings their happy young days back. Written September 1997.
What is love?
Love can be a wonderful thing when it makes the birds sing.
Love can be a hurtful thing then it becomes a painful thing.
Love can put you on a piece of string when it stings.
Love can be full of summer and spring.
You are my lover, there's no other like you.
Beauty is love of a rose and thorn, one goes where the other one goes.
When young gentleman gives young ladies flowers, it bring men plenty of powers.
Please do not fear anymore, please love more.
Oh please let's kiss your lovely tender lips that I miss.
I will look forward to the summer's days in hoping love will be.
The lovely daises come out in the spring of may.
I have had so many loves that have broken my heart, I hope that my heart is art. September 1997.
I thought I would be brave enough to love again.
When I love again ups and downs well start again but that's life.
Love can be wonderful, romantic, lovely and good.
Love can turn evil and bad.
If long lasting couple stay together forever.
They go round the bend if they spend too much time together.
Old and gray will pass their days.
No energy of love brings their happy young days back. Written September 1997.
What is love?
Love can be a wonderful thing when it makes the birds sing.
Love can be a hurtful thing then it becomes a painful thing.
Love can put you on a piece of string when it stings.
Love can be full of summer and spring.
You are my lover, there's no other like you.
Beauty is love of a rose and thorn, one goes where the other one goes.
When young gentleman gives young ladies flowers, it bring men plenty of powers.
Please do not fear anymore, please love more.
Oh please let's kiss your lovely tender lips that I miss.
I will look forward to the summer's days in hoping love will be.
The lovely daises come out in the spring of may.
I have had so many loves that have broken my heart, I hope that my heart is art. September 1997.
The feeling of love and pain.
When your heart aches it brings sadness and pain, people get hurt everyday.
You feel so unhappy, drinking is the only way to accept that this person has gone.
Lost love feels like death, you feel as if your whole life is going down the drain.
Days and nights pass sadness does not last but happiness does not last either.
It makes you wonder if there is such a word as love, if so love should last forever.
Enjoy happiness while it lasts, please try for your own sake to get over the past.
For a long time tears have run down my eyes when I have been alone without love.
For a long time I have been frightened to love but I never thought I'd love again.
Now I will love small until I get to know them, I must not rush into things.
I was left standing in the dark without love for a long time, now I am happy.
Sadness fills your life with tears living with a broken heart for years.
When someone you dearly love breaks your heart it cuts you up like a knife.
When my heart is broken I never sleep, I just lye in bed with tearful eyes.
You never forget the old love yet but the memory of your old love lives on.
The love that let's love go, desires to live their lives to regret what they have done. 1997 - 2000
True love.
My true love has got a heart.
My true love has my heart.
I hope we will never ever part.
I hope he is even truer than the last heart.
When I lost my old heart, it felt like death because he was my longest heart.
Now I have a new heart it's as if I never knew the old heart. 1997 - 2000
When your heart aches it brings sadness and pain, people get hurt everyday.
You feel so unhappy, drinking is the only way to accept that this person has gone.
Lost love feels like death, you feel as if your whole life is going down the drain.
Days and nights pass sadness does not last but happiness does not last either.
It makes you wonder if there is such a word as love, if so love should last forever.
Enjoy happiness while it lasts, please try for your own sake to get over the past.
For a long time tears have run down my eyes when I have been alone without love.
For a long time I have been frightened to love but I never thought I'd love again.
Now I will love small until I get to know them, I must not rush into things.
I was left standing in the dark without love for a long time, now I am happy.
Sadness fills your life with tears living with a broken heart for years.
When someone you dearly love breaks your heart it cuts you up like a knife.
When my heart is broken I never sleep, I just lye in bed with tearful eyes.
You never forget the old love yet but the memory of your old love lives on.
The love that let's love go, desires to live their lives to regret what they have done. 1997 - 2000
True love.
My true love has got a heart.
My true love has my heart.
I hope we will never ever part.
I hope he is even truer than the last heart.
When I lost my old heart, it felt like death because he was my longest heart.
Now I have a new heart it's as if I never knew the old heart. 1997 - 2000
Love verse one.
I once fell in love with who I thought was a gentleman I thought he was so handsome and sweet.
I feel so guilty for seeing him, I just can't keep my eyes off him.
After two and a half years he went off with someone else.
Find the right heart.
The memory of history love is never in the mind forgotten but we should learn to talk less about the past to look to the future.
As hard as it is be strong, keep trying to love, you know you may well meet the right lover for you.
Sometimes hearts break so bad it puts you off loving anyone at all.
Sometimes you may well want your older lover back, no one else will do.
Sometimes love can end for the best reasons but then in other cases for the worse reasons.
Sweet love should never die.
Love should be perfect enough to keep love but no one should except to keep love because it does not last forever.
Sadness get's far out of control, love then dies. 1997 - 2000
I miss you so much.
I miss you so much, I dream about you such a lot.
When I sleep, I sleep deep than a log.
When I am at the disco, you really truly make night.
When I get I miss you as if I missed you all my life.
May be for once in my life I might have found the love. 1997 - 2000
I once fell in love with who I thought was a gentleman I thought he was so handsome and sweet.
I feel so guilty for seeing him, I just can't keep my eyes off him.
After two and a half years he went off with someone else.
Find the right heart.
The memory of history love is never in the mind forgotten but we should learn to talk less about the past to look to the future.
As hard as it is be strong, keep trying to love, you know you may well meet the right lover for you.
Sometimes hearts break so bad it puts you off loving anyone at all.
Sometimes you may well want your older lover back, no one else will do.
Sometimes love can end for the best reasons but then in other cases for the worse reasons.
Sweet love should never die.
Love should be perfect enough to keep love but no one should except to keep love because it does not last forever.
Sadness get's far out of control, love then dies. 1997 - 2000
I miss you so much.
I miss you so much, I dream about you such a lot.
When I sleep, I sleep deep than a log.
When I am at the disco, you really truly make night.
When I get I miss you as if I missed you all my life.
May be for once in my life I might have found the love. 1997 - 2000
Love is for you and me forever.
You sweet kiss of your sweet lips is like a wild red rose.
Tear drops running on my clothes when I do not see you.
When I walk outside the moon light always shines.
I weep in the time I do not see you as tears run down my face.
Very often I hold my brave tears inside my eyes.
My feelings for you my dear are hard to hide.
Why do we love, if we can't keep thy love.
What is the answer for falling in and out of love?
Who is the person that I love? You are the person who I love.
I miss you sweet kiss from your tender lips.
To be kind is to be fair to your love.
I miss you so much when you aren't here with me.
Beauty and kindness is to care, share and be there.
To fall in and out of love can be blind but it does not stop us all. 1997 - 2000
He is the love of my life.
My dearest love, I hope I become your bride.
I will not tie you down though, you can have your freedom.
At the disco we meet again showing our love together.
I hope we will be together forever until our dieing day.
Love should be full of happiness, love should be of laughter.
Love should live happily ever after for every man and woman. 1997 - 2000
You sweet kiss of your sweet lips is like a wild red rose.
Tear drops running on my clothes when I do not see you.
When I walk outside the moon light always shines.
I weep in the time I do not see you as tears run down my face.
Very often I hold my brave tears inside my eyes.
My feelings for you my dear are hard to hide.
Why do we love, if we can't keep thy love.
What is the answer for falling in and out of love?
Who is the person that I love? You are the person who I love.
I miss you sweet kiss from your tender lips.
To be kind is to be fair to your love.
I miss you so much when you aren't here with me.
Beauty and kindness is to care, share and be there.
To fall in and out of love can be blind but it does not stop us all. 1997 - 2000
He is the love of my life.
My dearest love, I hope I become your bride.
I will not tie you down though, you can have your freedom.
At the disco we meet again showing our love together.
I hope we will be together forever until our dieing day.
Love should be full of happiness, love should be of laughter.
Love should live happily ever after for every man and woman. 1997 - 2000
Court in couples.
Lovers behind the trees in the fields.
The laddie loves the lassie endlessly.
She stands by smelling the red roses in the park singing a sweet song.
He stops her from singing by kissing her as he kisses her red sweet lips.
They have loved so many times before but their love has been more and more blind.
It's four o, clock in the morning, the cuckoo is calling.
It's a very warm spring morning that's dawning.
The cuckoo bird will sing for joy for the freshness of spring.
When it comes to lying in the sand, summer love is on it's way.
How quiet and peaceful early hours of the morning can be.
How romantic the whole world could be when it wants to be.
To be old and unhappy together fall too love together.
Falling in and out of love far too long, enough is enough time to end love for good.
Moving on love happens and ends again until the end of life.
When death comes it's a loss sorrow, sadness and pain.
From earth to heaven you will love again. Written September 1997
I once fell in love with you.
I once fell madly in love with you.
I thought you were the one for me but how wrong was I?
I thought you were handsome and the most sweetest guy of all.
One night at the Walsall disco I met someone just nice and sweet as you.
After two and a half years I found it hard to stop loving you.
You went off with another lassie and broke my heart in two. Written September 1997
Lovers behind the trees in the fields.
The laddie loves the lassie endlessly.
She stands by smelling the red roses in the park singing a sweet song.
He stops her from singing by kissing her as he kisses her red sweet lips.
They have loved so many times before but their love has been more and more blind.
It's four o, clock in the morning, the cuckoo is calling.
It's a very warm spring morning that's dawning.
The cuckoo bird will sing for joy for the freshness of spring.
When it comes to lying in the sand, summer love is on it's way.
How quiet and peaceful early hours of the morning can be.
How romantic the whole world could be when it wants to be.
To be old and unhappy together fall too love together.
Falling in and out of love far too long, enough is enough time to end love for good.
Moving on love happens and ends again until the end of life.
When death comes it's a loss sorrow, sadness and pain.
From earth to heaven you will love again. Written September 1997
I once fell in love with you.
I once fell madly in love with you.
I thought you were the one for me but how wrong was I?
I thought you were handsome and the most sweetest guy of all.
One night at the Walsall disco I met someone just nice and sweet as you.
After two and a half years I found it hard to stop loving you.
You went off with another lassie and broke my heart in two. Written September 1997
Love verse two.
I can picture your handsome face very clear indeed.
I hope our love will work out to be.
I miss you so much.
I try to sleep but I weep.
I love you so much, I could eat like a pig.
I want to give you wild red roses.
I want to give you my love. Written September 1997
What is love: where is love.
Love can romantic and full of wonderful things.
The happiest time should be spring.
You have to catch the right fish in the sea,( that can be very hard to be.)
Sometimes love can end with so much anger, sorrow and pain.
Sometimes love can be such a strain.
Sometimes love can be anywhere to be.
Sometimes love can met in the most strange places to be.
It could be under the sea. Written September 1997.
Is Mr Mate worth the wait?
When me and you slit my life fell to bits.
I have never felt the same since.
I never thought I'd ever want to love again.
After a long wait I have met Mr Mate.
I just hope Mr Mate was worth the wait. Written September 1997.
I'm the lover of my lad.
I'm the lover of my lad.
I hope spring is around then condor.
It would be great for us to hear the birds sing. Written September 1997
Only you I trust.
When I am not with you, I sometimes feel sad.
When I am not with you, I sometimes feel lonely.
Every night and day I worry about you more than I show you.
I care about you a lot more than I show you.
Sometimes I feel guilty and bad because I don't want to upset you.
I am very often worried in case my feelings are far too heavy for you but I am very fond of you.
I just hope I give you enough space from me, the freedom what you want to do but at the same time I really miss you.
I can picture your handsome face very clear indeed.
I hope our love will work out to be.
I miss you so much.
I try to sleep but I weep.
I love you so much, I could eat like a pig.
I want to give you wild red roses.
I want to give you my love. Written September 1997
What is love: where is love.
Love can romantic and full of wonderful things.
The happiest time should be spring.
You have to catch the right fish in the sea,( that can be very hard to be.)
Sometimes love can end with so much anger, sorrow and pain.
Sometimes love can be such a strain.
Sometimes love can be anywhere to be.
Sometimes love can met in the most strange places to be.
It could be under the sea. Written September 1997.
Is Mr Mate worth the wait?
When me and you slit my life fell to bits.
I have never felt the same since.
I never thought I'd ever want to love again.
After a long wait I have met Mr Mate.
I just hope Mr Mate was worth the wait. Written September 1997.
I'm the lover of my lad.
I'm the lover of my lad.
I hope spring is around then condor.
It would be great for us to hear the birds sing. Written September 1997
Only you I trust.
When I am not with you, I sometimes feel sad.
When I am not with you, I sometimes feel lonely.
Every night and day I worry about you more than I show you.
I care about you a lot more than I show you.
Sometimes I feel guilty and bad because I don't want to upset you.
I am very often worried in case my feelings are far too heavy for you but I am very fond of you.
I just hope I give you enough space from me, the freedom what you want to do but at the same time I really miss you.
I really enjoy your company.
I really enjoy your fun.
I really enjoy talking to you.
I really enjoy listening to you.
I really enjoy your love.
It seems like your the only man who understands where I am coming from because you are in nearly the same situation as me.
I hope you feel the same about me too.
That does not mean that I want push you into doing what you don't want to do, I enjoy your friendship far too much for that.
I will go along with whatever you want, very close friends or lovers, you are only man I trust.
I hope you trust me the same way. 17.8.1999
I really enjoy your fun.
I really enjoy talking to you.
I really enjoy listening to you.
I really enjoy your love.
It seems like your the only man who understands where I am coming from because you are in nearly the same situation as me.
I hope you feel the same about me too.
That does not mean that I want push you into doing what you don't want to do, I enjoy your friendship far too much for that.
I will go along with whatever you want, very close friends or lovers, you are only man I trust.
I hope you trust me the same way. 17.8.1999
My longest love.
I used to try to sleep but could not I just used to weep.
When morning has risen I could not hardy eat.
I used to think I had nothing to look forward to, the winter was so cold and dull without my longest love, I would just weep even more so.
I used to wonder what to do with myself the depression was that bad.
I wanted to give him roses.
I wanted to give him love.
The long cold nights were lonely and not very nice without him.
The hot summer nights lovers were on their way.
Here I was too frightened to love again, I needed to cool down in my den.
Now I am learning to understand that we are not right for one another after all.
Now he has gone out of my life, I love again I just hope he loves me better than he did.
Now I feel I have a better fella. September 1997.
I used to try to sleep but could not I just used to weep.
When morning has risen I could not hardy eat.
I used to think I had nothing to look forward to, the winter was so cold and dull without my longest love, I would just weep even more so.
I used to wonder what to do with myself the depression was that bad.
I wanted to give him roses.
I wanted to give him love.
The long cold nights were lonely and not very nice without him.
The hot summer nights lovers were on their way.
Here I was too frightened to love again, I needed to cool down in my den.
Now I am learning to understand that we are not right for one another after all.
Now he has gone out of my life, I love again I just hope he loves me better than he did.
Now I feel I have a better fella. September 1997.
The open rose that goes. ( part two.)
I used to feel sad to lose your love.
Now I am glad that I have a new love.
I lost the ring you bought, I don't know where I lost it but that's when I knew that our love has gone for good.
Then I found the ring onto of my wardrobe.
Why should I give it back to you?
You bought this ring for me.
Why should I live my life in sin because of you?
I am loving again without more difficulty. September 1997
He has gone.
He has gone out of my life.
I am very sad and very lonely without him.
He left me for another lassie.
I wonder if he still thinks about me? I shouldn't think he does.
I have a very sad feeling he'll never love me again, may be he never did and never will.
My eyes are full of tears after two and a half years.
I don't feel as if anyone is here but me I feel so alone.
I do not feel as if anyone else is out there for me.
No one and not even me can bring him back to me.
I lye on my pillow, wondering what the future will bring and whether my life is worth living or not.
I may meet my next true love under the sea but I wish it could be he.
He has gone out of my life forever, I do not know whether it makes my life worse or better.
I wish he'd send me a letter then may be I would feel better knowing how he really feels.
My heat wonders and breaks.
I wonder whose living a worse life me or him. mid autumn to early winter 1996.
I used to feel sad to lose your love.
Now I am glad that I have a new love.
I lost the ring you bought, I don't know where I lost it but that's when I knew that our love has gone for good.
Then I found the ring onto of my wardrobe.
Why should I give it back to you?
You bought this ring for me.
Why should I live my life in sin because of you?
I am loving again without more difficulty. September 1997
He has gone.
He has gone out of my life.
I am very sad and very lonely without him.
He left me for another lassie.
I wonder if he still thinks about me? I shouldn't think he does.
I have a very sad feeling he'll never love me again, may be he never did and never will.
My eyes are full of tears after two and a half years.
I don't feel as if anyone is here but me I feel so alone.
I do not feel as if anyone else is out there for me.
No one and not even me can bring him back to me.
I lye on my pillow, wondering what the future will bring and whether my life is worth living or not.
I may meet my next true love under the sea but I wish it could be he.
He has gone out of my life forever, I do not know whether it makes my life worse or better.
I wish he'd send me a letter then may be I would feel better knowing how he really feels.
My heat wonders and breaks.
I wonder whose living a worse life me or him. mid autumn to early winter 1996.
The last time I saw the man I love.
Whether he still loves and cares about me I don't know.
Most of all I know he does not want to talk to me.
He's mind seems very twisted to me.
Surly he can't have got over me just like that.
The last time I saw the man I love he he seemed so confused.
He seemed so full of guilt and hurtful pain.
He has a new love, why isn't he happy at all?
Why does he seem more unhappy than what I do?
There must be many men out there as true as he used to be.
Where are these men to be?
Why can't I find the love I want for me? Autumn to winter 1996
I love you dear.( That's what they all say.)
I love you dear.
Your lying to me dear,
I am not like the rest of the men dear, you don't have a thing to fear.
Oh no you can't be true to me dear, I am not that lucky every man hates me.
Don't be silly dear, you fear too much dear.
I love you dear, I don't hate you dear. Written 1997
We could understand one another.
Me and my ex lover could understand one another in our hearts and minds all the time.
We used to trust one another but I am not sure about now after he broke my heart so badly.
I have no answer to my mind other than the fact that I am so blind to love.
We loved one another so kind or we thought we did.
Looking back it was just a happy dream I have woken up to sadness.
That sadness I will get used to because it's true then it will turn to happiness.
May be I am better off away from him.
I wish I could get him off my mind, he seemed so kind but in the end he hurt me so. Written 1997.
Whether he still loves and cares about me I don't know.
Most of all I know he does not want to talk to me.
He's mind seems very twisted to me.
Surly he can't have got over me just like that.
The last time I saw the man I love he he seemed so confused.
He seemed so full of guilt and hurtful pain.
He has a new love, why isn't he happy at all?
Why does he seem more unhappy than what I do?
There must be many men out there as true as he used to be.
Where are these men to be?
Why can't I find the love I want for me? Autumn to winter 1996
I love you dear.( That's what they all say.)
I love you dear.
Your lying to me dear,
I am not like the rest of the men dear, you don't have a thing to fear.
Oh no you can't be true to me dear, I am not that lucky every man hates me.
Don't be silly dear, you fear too much dear.
I love you dear, I don't hate you dear. Written 1997
We could understand one another.
Me and my ex lover could understand one another in our hearts and minds all the time.
We used to trust one another but I am not sure about now after he broke my heart so badly.
I have no answer to my mind other than the fact that I am so blind to love.
We loved one another so kind or we thought we did.
Looking back it was just a happy dream I have woken up to sadness.
That sadness I will get used to because it's true then it will turn to happiness.
May be I am better off away from him.
I wish I could get him off my mind, he seemed so kind but in the end he hurt me so. Written 1997.
My soft mind.
I can't believe that I believed a dream to be true.
It now seems like an a nightmare but it's the truth.
How silly I was thinking you loved me but you did not.
The fact you have gone out of my life it hurts because I still love you.
It's true that I knew you but a silly dream that you loved me.
I feelings are far too strong to forget the memories.
I find it hard to believe that I thought you were a gentleman. Written 1997.
When I fall in love.
When I fall in love I can't eat or sleep.
I always now fear that my love will never keep.
In some ways love makes me feel strong but in other ways it makes me feel weak.
Night after night, day after day I pray that one day love will come my way.
It will never come my way any day. 1997
The love he found made him blind.
The man I loved who I thought was a gentleman I loved him.
I must have been dreaming because I don't think he loved me.
He is in love with someone else now but it all must be his head, he is so blind to her like I was to him.
He could do better than her but she does not have to be me, she needs to be someone who does not make him blind to the rest of the world.
May be he could meet better than me.
May be I'd be blind to the sunshine in my eyes. 1997
Does my new love still want me?
I wrote a letter, does it make things worse or better?
What would he do if I turned up on his door step?
Will he love me more or less? End of 1997.
I can't believe that I believed a dream to be true.
It now seems like an a nightmare but it's the truth.
How silly I was thinking you loved me but you did not.
The fact you have gone out of my life it hurts because I still love you.
It's true that I knew you but a silly dream that you loved me.
I feelings are far too strong to forget the memories.
I find it hard to believe that I thought you were a gentleman. Written 1997.
When I fall in love.
When I fall in love I can't eat or sleep.
I always now fear that my love will never keep.
In some ways love makes me feel strong but in other ways it makes me feel weak.
Night after night, day after day I pray that one day love will come my way.
It will never come my way any day. 1997
The love he found made him blind.
The man I loved who I thought was a gentleman I loved him.
I must have been dreaming because I don't think he loved me.
He is in love with someone else now but it all must be his head, he is so blind to her like I was to him.
He could do better than her but she does not have to be me, she needs to be someone who does not make him blind to the rest of the world.
May be he could meet better than me.
May be I'd be blind to the sunshine in my eyes. 1997
Does my new love still want me?
I wrote a letter, does it make things worse or better?
What would he do if I turned up on his door step?
Will he love me more or less? End of 1997.
Is my love blind?
When I have fallen in love I have always been blind.
Being blind is always at the back of my mind.
I feel love sick yet I could be blind.
There so many emotions going through my possible blind mind.
Am I blind enough to not know that my love may die.
I hope that my love will stay alive.
I hope that he will always be mine.
No matter many years I have loved I have always been blind. Written end of 1997.
What happened to us?
I loved you, did you love me?
I think we loved each other as much as we could but I don't think you believed how much I really loved you.
Then I question in those two and a half years did you love me.
May be I used to dream that you loved and that I am starting to wake up from that dream sadly knowing you did not after all.
What happened to us, what did we both do wrong to one another?
You were my longest true love, that's why I can't forget your love.
I know I can't live in hope, all I can do is get on with life to see what happens.
Now I don't mind what you want to do, as long as you are happy.
This poem is written from me to you to tell you that I still love and care about you.
Don't worry I am not saying we should get back together, we will never be how we used to be.
I just want you to be happy with or without me, I must learn to feel that way about you too. Written 27.2.1999.
When I have fallen in love I have always been blind.
Being blind is always at the back of my mind.
I feel love sick yet I could be blind.
There so many emotions going through my possible blind mind.
Am I blind enough to not know that my love may die.
I hope that my love will stay alive.
I hope that he will always be mine.
No matter many years I have loved I have always been blind. Written end of 1997.
What happened to us?
I loved you, did you love me?
I think we loved each other as much as we could but I don't think you believed how much I really loved you.
Then I question in those two and a half years did you love me.
May be I used to dream that you loved and that I am starting to wake up from that dream sadly knowing you did not after all.
What happened to us, what did we both do wrong to one another?
You were my longest true love, that's why I can't forget your love.
I know I can't live in hope, all I can do is get on with life to see what happens.
Now I don't mind what you want to do, as long as you are happy.
This poem is written from me to you to tell you that I still love and care about you.
Don't worry I am not saying we should get back together, we will never be how we used to be.
I just want you to be happy with or without me, I must learn to feel that way about you too. Written 27.2.1999.
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