DECEMBER 2006

I can't see.
I can't see any further than my nose.
I think it's a big long road.
I can't take that big long road; it's far too far for me to walk to see what is there.
I am just scared what will happen when I get there.
I want to get off here before I get there, I can't see myself getting to the end of the road.

So high, when I look up I feel as if I want to fly.
Yet I would be too scared to fly going up high.
I don't know if I would feel strong enough to come back down again.
I don't like the thought of going up high unless I am in a plane.
I don't like seeing thought.

I don't know what I will see when I get there.
Will I go left, right or straight on?
I don't know where to turn.
I am too scared to try so I want to cruel into a hole to die.

The sky seems high rise flats by where I live.
I keep thinking that someone is going to fall out of them.
I keep thinking that they are all going to fall down. December 2006

A lot of people say.
A lot of people find and see poetry boring.
Poetry is only boring if the poet makes it boring.
Mind you I feel bad to say that I have an overloaded mind and it just gets down on paper.

A lot of us poets may write words of sadness but words of truth.
I write words of happiness and sadness.
Most words of happiness are the truth but very little.
When it comes to that it makes us wonder why we are here in the first place.
Most poets, people who write plays, People who write novels and other writers find it hard to let they're feeling out in any other way other than writing.
Writing is not always easy to put into words but then people can't answer you back.
It does not mean you can't be a writer if you find words hard to write on paper, just say what's going through your mind and write it.
Writing is from the mind, not art.
Everyone has a book in them because we live life.
I need to research to give me ideas what to write about.
If your mind is full ideas, write them down.
You can keep at it until you get there; I am still working on it now.
I have been writing for 13 years.

Some people express themselves in painting and drawing, which I do sometimes, that's art. December 2006

The great thing about poetry.
The great thing about poetry is that you can say what you mean.
You can also say what you don't mean as long as you tell your readers you don't mean it.
Mostly you can say how you feel.
Poets should make things understood so readers can read between the lines what the poets say and mean.
Sometimes some things are hard to think about when it comes to thinking about a subject.
Think about what to write: what not to write.
Learn off other poets but not too much, be yourself because we all live so we have a book inside ourselves. December 2006

I don't want to leave you.
You are not the problem, it's me.
I only feel better when I am with you.
You might be the only one keeping me going but I don't feel I can.
The world seems big and larger than life to me, it all seems so far away.
I still have so long to live it scares me.
I don't like it this way, the fear of having walking sticks and frames. December 2006

There are good times and bad.
Today I don't feel too bad.
Tomorrow I may feel down.
Sorry, I must say I will never know.
The good thing is that I am eating a meal; I can smell cottage pie and veg.
When I am low, I don't eat that much.
It makes a big difference when I see people.
I saw my best friend today that's good.
I just wish I would not take my stress out on my lover; he is also my best friend.

May be when I get work one day, I can save up for getting my work published and new clothes.
I will still enjoy my social life all the same.
I can't have everything.
We want different things but can't have everything as we haven't got it. December 2006

You are our loving friends.

      You are our loving friends.
We can't borrow you.
We can't buy or sell you.
We can't fire you.
We can't do much without you.

We can have fun with you.
We can fool around with you.
We can talk to you.
We can do a lot with you.

We will always be around you.
We hope you will be around us.
Whenever you want us we will be there.
When you don't want us, we won't bother you anywhere.
You may think sometimes that you don't have friends but we and other friends are around you are placed somewhere. Written 1998 - 1999.

Every girl’s dream and nightmare.

It's every girl's dream and a nightmare to become a bride.
Not every girl is lucky to meet a man of her kind.
Not every girl meets her prince charming the love of her life.
When becoming a man's wife it can be a story of a woman's life.
The number of years good girls have to wait to be a gentleman's wife.
Having been a gentleman's wife it is not what we think to might.
Some days can be a rather unhappy site to be a man's wife.
A wife might end up blowing into her kite.
Girls, don’t you agree that a lot of men are such mites? Written 1997 - 2000

I love you, Antonio, my longest lasted laddie.

I love you, Antonio, my longest lasted laddie.
Why did you go off with another lassie?
You know I love you so badly and sadly.
Now I will never ever have another laddie.
You have broken my heart you mean Romano.
I fell in love with you so madly, gladly and sadly Antonio.
You are such a baddie but I love you.
I must be blind not to know that you'd treat me unkind.
Don't you have any love, care to understand on your mind?
I so very much wanted to be your bride so I must get that out of my mind. Written 1996 to 1997.

Thank you for my loving caring friends.

Thank you for having trust in me.
Thank you for been trusting friends to me.
Thank you for listening to me what I have to say to you all.
Thank you for advising me and talking to me.
Thank you for giving the life that I really want.
I'd like to think I can do the same for you.
Without you, I will crack up.
I hope my dream will come true to love again.
Thank you for cheering me up when I am feeling down.
Thank you so much for been there when I needed you.
Thank you for being honest with me; I will try my best to be honest with you.
Thank you for helping me through disappointments in life.
I will be more than happy to help you in every way and all the way.
Most of all thank you all for being very good friends and thank you for being you. 1997 – 2000

lOVE.
One always wonders why we are all ever born.
Our parents fall in love and bring us to the world.
Most parents break and then that cause anger, hurt and pain to us all.
We fall in love and the pain of ended love hurts even more.
Love is like a story, love is like a book; please turn over a lot more than a thousand pages your welcome to have a look.
I have got to the stage of thinking either forever love or no love at all the pain is too much to cope with.
I hope I am wrong in thinking I could be so weak, I hope I become strong.
Will I ever meet my forever love?
I have fallen in and out of love so many times every love I have had has a fairy tale dream story and nightmare in them.
Our dreams will more than likely come true but life is one big dream for you and me. 1996