LEANING HOW TO BELIEVE IN MYSELF.

Learning to believe in you.

Take me as I am or don't take me at all!
Love me as a person or don't love me at all!
Be what and who you want before you go there!
There are times that the truth hurts but lies hurt even more.
Learn to have love and faith in yourself before love and expect someone else to have love and trust in you!
Learning how to love and trust in you may sound big headed but there's nothing like being sure of yourself first.
If you can't have faith, love, and trust in yourself then be honest with yourself not to have others in your life at all.
For those of you who have hurt people, now does the truth hurt?
Those of us who believe in ourselves learn to love and trust others and we rid of those who have let us down.
It's far too easy for us to blame ourselves when we are hurt.

We are all only human we all make mistakes.
It takes two to tango the blame isn't all on one person.
The most blame is on the person who hurt you and let you go.
You are so much better than they are and there is someone out there for you so much better than what they were.
You just need to stop taking too much of the blame when you are mostly not to blame.

You can’t change what’s happened but you can improve what’s going to happen.

Believe yourself otherwise you will doubt yourself all the while.

Don’t take the pain out on yourself and the person who you love now!
Don't take out on others what you have been through but then time to take care of yourself now than once you have faith, love, and trust in yourself then move on!

Don't bring yourself down to the person who has hurt you for you to hurt someone else, which everyone knows is so easy to do without knowing it but in time think about it then you start blaming yourself so don't give yourself any reason to do!

I'm telling myself as well as telling you, those of us who have been hurt we need to tell ourselves we are mostly not to blame because the main blame is on the losers, we are not.
We showed them love but they didn't know what love is but that's not our fault.
They led us on instead of them not been honest with us and not telling us they aren't interested, they had a relationship with us that lived a lie because they didn't love us.
It may have disappointed us that they didn't feel the same way as us at the time but at least it would have been the truth.
To learn to love you before loving yourself is the best love of all.

To have faith, love, and trust in yourself then you will have the same for your partner.
You can balance between being yourself not being headed because why beat yourself up over things that are not all your fault even though they seem like they are?
Most people like to get in your life to rib your heart apart to a point they want to blame you, don't let them!
Building faith, love, and trust again are so hard to a point we can lose our self-belief it's not easy I know but let's not let it! 30.10.2014 - 8.11.2014

Whatever the choice.

There's no way of getting it right first time.
Even if feels right it not always is yet if it feels wrong it could be right.
Rightly or wrongly you can never please anyone, very often in the end you can't please yourself.
Things aren't always at the end as they are at the start.
Very few of us get it right first time but others just sail through life.
Those who are out there to look out for us but life are just a game of chance.
Yet there's no chance really life so why we here?
There are so many questions that are unknown.
The reasons are unknown to how the world around and how we all came about.
Life is known to try us to see what happens.
It's unknown unless we try yet we can't try all.
Where does it all come from?
What is life all about?
Some luck comes to others but others it doesn't.
Everything is different in different ways, how boring it would be if it was all the same. 30.10.2014 - 8.11.2014

Leave my mind alone.

Leave my mind alone, I don't love you anymore.

Now I love someone else so much better, you have left my life so leave my mind.

You have only left my life because I have walked out of yours.

I have walked out your life for good because you want me more than just friends but then no you want to hurt me again.

I won't let you hurt me again because I won't be in your life.

I'm not walking back in your life again, no way.

All I have left from you is anger and pain.

You are like poison floating through my mind.

Now I have walked away from your game of cat and mouse.

Whatever I wanted you wanted the opposite so I learned you played childish games.

I was far too blind at the time to see that you were playing with my mind.

You are like a silly boy child who has never grown up.

At the time all I could think about is how much I love you but then, in the end, you hurt me far too much to carry staying with you for the rest of life yet you were everything I hoped for not I don't want anymore.

 Yet it's hard to believe that love I have for you for so long has grown into so much hate. 11. 11.14

I'm no more your lover or victim.

First of all I was born to be your victim of love.
I fell for your love so many time but not anymore.
So many times you left me in the dark,
 not really knowing how I really felt for you, knowing I foolishly loved you so much. 

I never had any luck when it came to love.
Now I have learned how to get by with or without love.
Even though I have moved on to what I was I'm still not 100 percent in myself.

I took so much pain and stress from you. shame on you.
Now my life is moving forward not backward.
Now I have learned to put the fault mostly on you, not myself.

Don't try to get back to me, I'm having no more.
No more of your mind games.
No more of your lies.
Stop messing and playing with my mind!

You may have made me a broke woman but I'm fixing
 myself now with or without any man's love.
I feel nothing for you but anger.
I don't lose sleep or waste a tear over you no more.

I'm more your lover.
I've no more your victim.

In the end, I found myself keeping my thoughts and feelings to myself in order to stop loving you.
I gave you all the love I could but what I could give you was never enough for you.

Now, this is the complete end of you and me. there's no going or looking back.
Our love was a big mistake and you led me a lie from start to finish.
There was no love from you to me even though there was from to you.
I lived 13 and a half years in your lies.
Now I'm with someone new there's nothing you can do.

You ripped my heart in half until we completely parted,
 this was happening from the very start but I was far to blind to see what was a head of me.
You threw our love away yet again I was to blind to see what was going to happen to me.
It's far too late now the damage is already done, you can't mend what you broke.
You can't touch anything or anybody without breaking somebody or something.

You may have left my life now you need to leave my mind.
I did everything I could to show you, my love.
Now enough is enough.
My love for you was so strong that in the end ran out for you.

I'm losing no more sleep over you.
I'm wasting no more tears over you.
Now I'm with someone new there's nothing you can do.
Now you have lost me for good, you should have loved me while you had the chance. 19.11.2014

What have you done for me?

What have you done for me?
Nothing at all
Before I knew you I didn't know what was coming to me.
I loved you in thinking you were the man for me, little did I know I was wrong to be.

Even though a lot of people knew the truth of you, I found out myself in the end.
In time I stopped loving you in my own time.
My feelings and walking away from you was hard to cope with at the same time.
You were a hard habit to break for a long time.
This made me learn the hard way.

In time I realized I was wrong to love a man who couldn't
 make up his mind how he felt about me.
How blind was I?
You couldn't make up your mind between me and her.
Wasn't my love good enough for you?
Isn't one love enough for you?

Your charm and sense of humor was what attracted me
 to you but your mind games and lies were hurting me all the time. 
My feelings towards you were keep me there for a long time yet
 I was so blind and out of my mind to have put up with you so long.


It must be sad to be you not knowing what you
 want in life when one lover isn't enough for you.
It seems to take a hell of a lot to make you happy or nothing at all.
A little is never enough for you.

Now it's far too late to kneel, beg, scream and cry back in my life like a boyish child.
Each and every way you're a loser.

In the end, you are your own victim, not the women because the way you treat women,
 you will have no luck at all.
In the end you have made yourself weak and us strong.

All these years I lived  your lie thinking that you loved me but you didn't.
I won't be the first or last to have made that mistake.
I have gained you have lost.
I have gained love but if anyone love you now they won't
 put up with as much mind games and lies as I did.
She won't be as weak as I used to be. 25.11.2014