Sucide awareness

 As we all know suicide awareness is not an easy topic to talk about and it is very serious and it can be easy for many people to not take it seriously and many tend to think the person who is facing suicide thoughts is seeking attention.

 It is not something someone makes up, they in enough pain to end feel like ending their lives whether they do or not and it's really their pain they want to end not their life, even though from complete upset they may sound that way. 

They are not lying about how they feel. If words come out wrong it is because they letting someone know how unhappy they are and how much pain they are into a point anything comes out, they are not lying.

I don't want to make anyone feel as if I am getting cross and mad with anyone but when most people face people who are facing suicidal thoughts etc, not all people but some tend to make them feel as if they have something to be ashamed of, guilty, seeking attention.

Yes, I will be honest say suicide like all deaths is upsetting on friends, family, etc but it is not selfish like I said people tend to say it how it sounds because they want to end their pain, not their life. Physical pain can make a person feel this way but mostly emotional pain. 

When living with something in your mind for a long time, it can become too much, like I have said in past posts some people may find it hard to go to see counselors, therapists, etc because as much as these services have laws, policies, etc to keep what people they say private, some people still don't want to tell other people their business. However just because someone may have gone for help doesn't mean whatever they are facing isn't serious enough to a point where they feel they have had enough of life. 

http://www.thecalmzone.net/

http://www.papyrus-uk.org/

http://www.lifelinehelpline.info/

http://www.premier.org.uk/lifeline

https://www.ripplesuicideprevention.com/

http://www.samaritans.org/

https://sossilenceofsuicide.org/

https://theolliefoundation.org/

When I was facing my breakdown, I had a lot of suicidal thoughts, felt like attempting, and even did a few times. I was feeling so down in myself, it was a time in my life I didn't really want my friends, family, etc to see but sadly what I thought then most people knew I wasn't having an easy time. Even years later now I am well over it, it is hard to say how I feel now because I am not in the flame of mind I was then because you don't want to seek attention but in one way I guess if there was a way no knew anything who knows what could happen.

 I was even out every day and night, which my family thought I was doing for the sake of it but I didn't really want to worry them about how I was really feeling at that time in my life. Every day and night was a challenge to wonder if you would get through or not, one thing I knew I always had to get home at the end of the day, even though it was late at night and I was drinking heavily. 

I was rock bottom down and I didn't want my Mum and family to know how life was getting but thinking about they knew but may not how bad, I knew at the time I had no espace from no matter how I tried so the lower I was feeling but then now I see it a different way, although I have become strong now I haven't forgotten. I tend to think even now maybe I shouldn't say anything or maybe I did right doing so even now I don't know to this day, not saying was right but even so people shouldn't judge and I didn't say for attention but every day I was feeling lower, very often I said to some people I have enough, I won't on the planet, etc, then they would say you said the same yesterday, etc and if you meant it you would have done it by now. Now by that never judge anyone and okay, it may not happen but then it may be, just that the person is having enough they wanted to end their pain. Back then though I had no real understanding of how I was making myself sound and having been upset as well, which is natural for anyone in that state of mind and there was very little counseling etc then as well.

 However' someone told me about counseling in the college I was at and at first, I froze at the thought because in my mind then they would think crazy, mad, etc but then as months went on I decided to give it a go and glad I did, not long after I got into writing poetry, which also helped me on my journey to moving forward but different things do and don't help different people.

I am not saying that suicides don't happen because that would be lying but when you are going through what you are going through whatever happens or doesn't you don't think you are going to get through whether you do or not, therefore neither judge a person if they say in so many words, even though it's upsetting they say they feel it's ending because it is their pain they want to end not their life. Don't judge them try to help them. 

Things not to say when someone is feeling suicidal. 

Never tell someone not to talk about the way they feel, they say things like I feel suicidal, I am having suicidal thoughts, I am going to or feel like killing myself.

Never say if you talk about you won't do it. That doesn't mean they will or they won't but you still shouldn't say that. The reason why is that you that they will or may feel as if you don't believe what they are facing, whether or not that is your intentions. They will feel misunderstood guilty, ashamed, which they shouldn't have to feel, they haven't done anything wrong and neither have you,  you don't want to make yourself misunderstood either. No one lies about these things or plans to seek attention, if they say these things something is seriously bothering them to a point where life is too painful for them so please do your best to help them, which these guidelines will advise you how. 

When someone is feeling really low it is a huge concern, they are struggling to think positive in everything including themselves. When comes to counseling, therapy, etc you have a duty as a counselor, thepest to keep everything private that's between you and the client. However' if the person chooses to tell other people their business that is their choice but you are not allowed to tell other people their business other if you the person is in any sort of danger like suicide etc, even then you only tell your manager or and whoever is in charge, which when you will need to tell the client for their own safety you need to let your manager know and why. The reason for this, take suicidal for example, say something happens after you have seen the client and your manager gets called that something has happened to that person, your manager, etc would be asking you if the client said anything to you on those lines whatever it may be and in this situation you no way of hiding this to keep your and being honest with you manage, etc. 

If you facing someone in a public situation who is feeling suicidal even if they tell people and no matter how many they are not lying or seeking attention etc, even more reason to know that this person is struggling to cope with whatever is going through their mind, they don't need judgment but for you to follow these colored guidelines and advice to start to try and help them move forward. In their mind feeling there is no way forward and they are feeling everything negative themselves, they are feeling several depression so they don't need anyone to make them feel guilty or ashamed of how they are feeling because they don't have anything to feel guilty about or ashamed of, neither do you because you doing what you can to try and help them.

How can I help someone who is suicidal?

If someone tells you they are suicidal do not dismiss their feelings but take what you are being told seriously. If someone puts enough trust in you to confide his/her innermost feelings you really need to listen to what is being said.

A person contemplating suicide is often in enormous turmoil inside - perhaps at one moment wanting to die and the next to live. He/she needs to know that someone has listened to and heard their pain, that someone can recognize that he/she is in pain and hurting so try and empathize with the person and repeat back, acknowledge the pain and hurt they are in so the person knows you are trying to understand what they are feeling.

If the suicidal person gives you a reason for feeling this way don't dismiss it that it isn't serious enough to kill himself/herself over. The fact that the person is feeling suicidal means that in his/her mind it is serious enough to not want to live anymore.

Allow the person to talk openly about how they are feeling, how long they have been feeling this way, have they made a plan as to how they will commit suicide, what do they think will happen to them when they die, etc.

Try to encourage the person to seek professional help in order that they are giving someone the chance to explore with them what is happening for them and to see whether they can help the person to see alternatives to suicide.

Show the person you genuinely care - this can often be enough in itself to prevent the person from taking their life at that moment in time.

Remember that you can give a person caring, support, time, patience, empathy but that person may at some stage still make the choice to end their life. If you try to help someone who is suicidal and they take their life it is their responsibility and choice to do that. If someone is that determined and set on killing themselves there is not a lot anyone could do to prevent that and you must never take the guilt or blame on your shoulders. All you can do is do your best for that person but some people can have all the counseling, medical intervention, support from family, friends etc. but still make a choice to end their life.

If you are providing support to someone who is suicidal do not forget to get support for yourself as well.

Useful Websites

www.papyrus-uk.org
Prevention of youth suicide: will help parents and carers of young people who are suicidal to make contact with appropriate sources of support. Papyrus also runs Hopeline UK 0800 068 4141 – for practical advice on suicide prevention

https://www.ripplesuicideprevention.com/
Online monitoring tool designed to present a visual page on a user's device the second they are flagged as searching for a harmful keyword or phrase highlighted within the R; people monitoring tool configuration. Keywords and phrases include any words or terminology which have been identified as displaying potentially damaging online content. The R; people page is presented before harmful online search results are displayed, and acts as an interception to encourage users to visit a mental health support page from one of our charity partners as an alternative to viewing harmful online results.

www.zerosuicidealliance.com
The Zero Suicide Alliance is a collaborative of National Health Service trusts, businesses, and individuals who are all committed to suicide prevention in the UK and beyond. The alliance is ultimately concerned with improving support for people contemplating suicide by raising awareness of and promoting FREE suicide prevention training which is accessible to all. The aims of this training are to enable people to identify when someone is presenting with suicidal throughs/behavior to be able to speak out in a supportive manner and to empower them to signpost the individual to the correct services or support.

 https://www.supportline.org.uk/problems/suicide/